When the next day arrived, neither felt the familiar urge to wear a mask and go to school but they still forced themselves to. They were met with the sight of their friends waiting for them when they reached the school before Luhan and Baekhyun instantly asked if the pair were alright and every other question they could think of, both paying far more attention to Minseok than necessary, leaving Jongdae to linger on the edge of their friends.

That was how Jongdae spent the day, even more invisible than ever before. Minseok had noticed, sadly, that Baekhyun and Luhan were paying special attention to him, making sure that he was alright, that he had lunch, that he was talking to the others. During lunchtime, Minseok had planned to spend a little time in silence, giving himself to think, but instead they had dragged him into the conversation. It was ironic really, that they were making sure Minseok did all these things and yet it was Jongdae who had known them the longest, he was the one who was the most miserable, hadn’t eaten and remained silent. But Minseok was the only one to notice these things and he regrettably didn’t do a thing about it, he wasn’t really given the chance, every time he was about to tell the younger to eat he was pulled back into the conversation. He had nudged Jongdae’s knee in an attempt to comfort him, to show that he knew he was still there, but it was wrongly received because a few seconds later Jongdae had shuffled away slightly.

By the end of the day, Minseok was ready to tear his hair out, he hadn’t been given a second to himself, let alone anyone other than Luhan or Baekhyun. He appreciated that they were concerned but their actions weren’t helping, they were hindering if anything. He felt suffocated, like they had wrapped him in bubble wrap and now all he wanted to do was escape. Though he didn’t get freedom, instead he got dragged to a bubble tea shop with the pair, plus Sehun and Chanyeol, and then forced to go back to Baekhyun’s to watch movies with them. This had left Jongdae by himself, who had felt slightly confused when Minseok had been dragged away with the promise that they would return him in one piece. By the time Minseok had returned, Jongdae had completed his homework, studied, showered and in the process of making himself sleepy by watching a film. “Hi” Minseok greeted as he stood in the living room doorway. Jongdae lazily waved in reply. “I’m sorry that I was gone, they didn’t give me the chance to say no” Minseok commented as he went to sit next to Jongdae.

“It’s fine, did you have fun?” Jongdae asked.

“Not really, the whole time Sehun was draped over Luhan and Chanyeol kept sneaking kisses and touches to Baekhyun.” Minseok replied. “What about you?” He asked.

“I got things done so I can’t complain” Jongdae gave a small shrug.

“Ah… That’s good then” Minseok looked down, he knew that what he had done must have hurt Jongdae in some way. “Are you alright?” He asked.

“Yeah” Jongdae replied.

“O-Oh” Minseok faltered, Jongdae had gone back to lying about the truth which was clear as day on the other’s face. “I’m just going… I’m going to shower” He mumbled before getting up and walking off.

Once Minseok was out of earshot, Jongdae sighed, visibly deflating and sinking into the couch, resuming the position he had been in before Minseok had come back. He tried to pay attention to the film that he had been watching. Being left alone with his thoughts had always been arduous and so having someone who understood that leave him to be alone with just his thoughts for company, it had hurt. He was fully aware that Minseok was also facing his own problems but what about all the days previous when he had made sure to be there for the other? Was he no longer seen as necessary and so thrown away by the older male? He reached for the remote, no longer wanting to watch the romantic comedy playing on the screen. He felt like it was mocking him, as if bragging about how much better the fictional characters’ lives were in comparison to his own. If only life was like movies, where everything miraculously gets better and then suddenly they can smell the roses, a happy ending for everyone except for that one character. Unless he was that one character? Maybe he was just a character in another person’s film, a lesser known character that disappears or dies pretty early on. Whatever his role was, he wished it would hurry up and become apparent because he was beginning to get frustrated with being just a lonely student that had a particularly depressing life so far.

He was snapped out of his thoughts when Minseok appeared in the doorway, hair wet and messy and his pyjamas on. “Have you eaten yet?” He asked as he stepped into the room.

“Yeah” Jongdae nodded, staring at the blank screen, not trusting himself to look up at the other as he knew he would feel guilty for lying, the other may have left him on his own, but he didn’t deserve to be lied to. Even about something so small. Minseok could tell when someone lied easily, this one was no exception. “Ok” He replied before going into the kitchen. The others had ordered take out but he had protested, stating that he wasn’t hungry when in actuality, he had simply wanted to eat with Jongdae. He set about making dinner for two, knowing that the other wouldn’t have the choice to refuse. So when he set down two steaming plates and pulled Jongdae into the kitchen, the younger reluctantly went over to the table before sitting down. “Why did you cook for me when I just told you that I already ate?” Jongdae asked.

“Because I know that it was a lie” Minseok replied.

“How did you know?” Jongdae asked quietly.

“I just knew” Minseok shrugged. “Just like I know that the others taking me out upset you” He added. Jongdae choked.

“Wh-What?” He spluttered.

“Come on, you can’t tell me that you were completely fine with it, even I wasn’t” Minseok replied.

“I-” Jongdae went to argue but was cut off.

“No, I know it hurt you and I’m sorry for it, I should have protested or something” Minseok commented.

“You shouldn’t apologise, it is fine, I mean, you have your own problems so I shouldn’t trouble you with my own” Jongdae replied as he began eating again. Minseok looked down at his food, suddenly put off. Jongdae had basically described what Minseok had done to him, telling him his problems openly even though he knew Jongdae had his own. He felt like he was clutching at straws with Jongdae, one minute they were close enough to hold hands and the next he felt a million miles away from him, not even being able to get him to tell the truth. “I… I’m sorry” Minseok found that his voice had gone hoarse, noticeably weakening as he found himself on the verge of tears. Just as he felt as though he was getting somewhere with Jongdae, the younger would distance himself so far away that he felt as though if he reached out, he wouldn’t be able to hold him. He felt alone again, for what it was worth, he felt like he was sat at the table by himself. He reminded himself that he would always be alone now whilst he forced himself not to think about the way his heart gave a painful tug. Ignoring the concerned look that Jongdae expressed, Minseok slid off his seat and walked out, opting to go upstairs and into his room. He sat down on the edge of his bed, for once refusing himself the permission to cry. Could he really not survive on his own? Would he always need someone to cling onto? What if he needed Jongdae so much more than Jongdae needed him? He wondered why he was putting himself through the motion of overthinking about being lonely again, the only difference this time was that he wasn’t crying. Yet.

“Minnie?” Minseok could hear Jongdae’s voice from the bottom of the stairs. “Minnie?” Jongdae called again, sounding as though he had reached the top. “Minseok?” Worry became evident in his voice. Minseok closed his eyes, wanting Jongdae to give up and go back downstairs. Though Jongdae didn’t leave it alone, as it was Minseok, he would never leave it alone. Minseok’s gaze flickered up to Jongdae’s as he appeared in the doorway frowning. “What’s wrong?” He asked, coming to sit next to Minseok on the bed.

“Nothing” Minseok replied, looking away from Jongdae.

“What is it? Don’t lie to me” Jongdae asked.

“I can’t lie to you but you find it perfectly acceptable to lie to me?” Minseok snapped, suddenly irritated by Jongdae’s words. “Hypocrite” He muttered.

“I didn’t lie to you” Jongdae replied.

“You didn’t lie to me? You lie to me every time you tell me you’re fine, you lied to me when you said you ate, would you like me continue?” Minseok asked, looking at Jongdae.

“No” Jongdae stated. “I’m sorry, just, please, you can tell me” He added in a softer tone.

“It’s just” Minseok began, his annoyance at the younger male disappearing. “I keep being reminded that they’re gone” He finished. “I-” He added before cutting himself off.

“What is it?” Jongdae asked.

“I’m scared that I can’t live on my own” Minseok admitted.

“Why are you worrying about that sort of thing now?” Jongdae questioned.

“You’re probably going to leave soon” Minseok commented quietly.

“When did you get that idea?” Jongdae asked, having not even thought about it himself.

“I didn’t, I just assumed…” Minseok trailed off.

“Minnie, I’m not going anywhere, I’ve told you before and I’ll tell you a thousand times, you’re not alone” Jongdae commented as he reached down to take Minseok’s hand. Minseok swallowed, his brain reminded him to enjoy this moment while it lasted, because it wouldn’t be long before the younger pulled away. “But you have to go home” He stated softly.

“I’ll phrase it differently, I won’t leave your side unless you want me to or unless you walk away” Jongdae replied, being painfully honest.

“You’ll be stuck here a long time then” Minseok commented.

“Gladly” Jongdae smiled. Minseok smiled back, appreciating the other’s words. They’re just words. They mean nothing at the end of the day. His brain decided, causing him to mentally shake himself. “Let’s get some sleep” Minseok decided, feeling himself grow tired. Jongdae agreed, leading to them preparing for bed and then slipping under the covers in darkness.

-

Another day, another night. Nothing particularly mattered to the pair, only if the other was alright. It seemed foolish to them both, not caring about schoolwork and family. Immersed in their own little world, one which was gradually building up each day, they were oblivious to their watching friends and concerned teachers. No one understood what was going on between the two, being left to guess. Little did they know that Jongdae would silently seek out Minseok’s hand and grasp it firmly, not letting go when there were no prying eyes, or how Minseok’s gaze would linger on the younger for a little longer than necessary. They both found comfort in these little gestures, neither of them realising how they wanted them to last longer than they actually did.

They constantly found themselves at the other’s side, no matter what they were doing, whether it was homework or cooking, they seemed to help each other out with them. The only time they parted was when they had separate classes or when they showered, though it would never be long before they reunited themselves. It was easier for them both to plaster on fake smiles to the rest of the world, like they had an unspoken agreement, as if it would change reality, transform it so that Minseok’s parents were home, not waiting to be buried and that Jongdae’s mother was perfectly healthy and they lived as a happy family. Smiling seemed to make possible the idea that the truth could turn out to be a lie. They believed in it falsely, wanting to cling to anything left. The pair knew it was futile and yet they still tried, the only reassurance being that they were doing so together.

-

When Friday rolled around, they were both thankful that they only had a day left before they could relax their exaggerated smiles. Minseok was stood in front of the mirror in the hallway, styling his hair whilst Jongdae watched, witnessing as the elder finished with his hair and let his mask seamlessly fall into place. Yet another day with a façade. When would they get to stop wearing them? When would the air clear and let them finally breathe? Why couldn’t they stop acting? What if their smiles became real? Jongdae toyed with the idea that the masks could become unneeded, left at home unused. He was pulled from his thoughts when he noticed Minseok was stood facing him, bag hanging off one shoulder. “Ready?” He asked. Jongdae nodded, slipping his shoes on and grabbing his bag before they walked out.

Upon reaching the school, they greeted their waiting friends as usual, walking inside with them. They stayed with them for as long as they could before departing for lessons. Jongdae wandered to class, not feeling rushed to get there in time, it was chemistry and although he wanted, needed, to get good grades he couldn’t find it in himself to care at that moment. He paid attention though, scribbling notes down as he did so. “Jongdae” He heard someone whisper before he felt a foot kick the side of his leg. He sighed, remembering who he was sat next to. “What do you want Baek?” He asked quietly as he continued writing.

“How’s Minseok?” Baekhyun asked. I’m great thanks. Jongdae stared at his notebook in front of him for a few seconds, debating on whether to ignore him or reply before giving in. “He’s fine” He muttered.

“Good to hear” Baekhyun whispered.

“Is that all?” Jongdae asked.

“It’s not like I’m interrupting you anyway, you’re still writing” Baekhyun replied.

“I would be writing quicker if it wasn’t for you talking to me” Jongdae stated quietly.

“Anyway, I was wondering, what’s up with the two of you?” Baekhyun asked. Jongdae paused in his writing.

“Am I interrupting something Jongdae and Baekhyun?” The teacher questioned from the front.

“No, sorry” Jongdae replied quickly before beginning to write again.

“So?” Baekhyun prompted after a few minutes.

“There’s nothing ‘up’ with us” Jongdae muttered.

“Are you sure?” Baekhyun asked.

“Yes!” Jongdae replied, wincing as he was a little louder than he expected.

“Only asking” Baekhyun mumbled before going back to his work. Jongdae stared at the board, it seemed that he couldn’t keep up appearances today. “I’m sorry” He whispered. Baekhyun glanced at him. “I’m just stressed out” Jongdae commented. Baekhyun nodded in understanding.

“You know, I find going out is sometimes quite relieving, just don’t go with Chanyeol, he makes it so much worse” Baekhyun replied quietly. Jongdae chuckled.

“So going into a busy town, bustling with people, calms you down?” Jongdae clarified.

“Not what I meant!” Baekhyun commented. “I just mean, go for a walk in the park, go casual shopping and don’t pay attention to anyone else, go buy ice cream or something” He added.

“Yeah because eating ice cream in the cold is a great idea” Jongdae replied.

“I was just suggesting ideas!” Baekhyun muttered.

“Byun Baekhyun, do you wish to spend your lunchtime with me?” The teacher asked as she spun on her heels to look at him. “If you do, keep talking” She added before turning back to the board. Baekhyun gaped slightly, pointing to Jongdae before pouting. “If I get detention because of you, I’m going to hurt you” Baekhyun muttered.

“Excellent job, Baekhyun, you now have detention” The teacher stated, never turning away from the board. Baekhyun cursed under his breath and kicked Jongdae again.

When they were finally dismissed, the pair parted ways to go to their next lessons with Baekhyun promising to hurt Jongdae later. “I’ll get Kyungsoo to punch you” Baekhyun stated before walking away. Jongdae chuckled before walking to his next to class.

True to his word, when Kyungsoo stepped into the cafeteria, the first thing he did was find Jongdae and punch his arm. Jongdae yelped, quickly covering his arm. “Why’d you do that?” He asked.

“Baekhyun told me that you were spreading rumours about me and Jongin” Kyungsoo commented before he seated himself at the table.

“I never said a thing!” Jongdae complained. Baekhyun sat down next, grinning at Jongdae who glared in return. Jongdae turned to Minseok and pouted slightly. “Minnie, my arm hurts” He commented quietly, rubbing the area on his arm where the other had hit him. Minseok chuckled.

“That’s what you get for spreading rumours” He replied.

“But I didn’t do it! It’s only because I got Baekhyun into detention! It wasn’t even my fault, he kept talking!” Jongdae stated.

“Is this true?” Minseok asked as he looked at Baekhyun who stared down at his lunch, avoiding eye contact.

“No” Baekhyun replied.

“Baekhyun” Minseok said warningly.

“Ok! Fine! It was a lie!” Baekhyun confessed. Kyungsoo promptly hit Baekhyun on the arm too before flashing Jongdae an apologetic smile. “How did you get out of detention anyway?” Jongdae asked.

“I used my charms to get out of it” Baekhyun declared.

“Charms? You have charms?” Jongdae asked, giving a short laugh incredulously.

“Hey! I could!” Baekhyun defended himself.

“What did you really do?” Kyungsoo asked.

“I promised not to talk in lesson anymore” Baekhyun replied. The others joined them then, occupying the empty spaces around the table. They all began a conversation, one which Jongdae and Minseok tuned out of. Jongdae glanced at the others, noting that they were all absorbed in their conversation so he slowly slid his hand off the table and reached for Minseok’s, threading their fingers together before letting their hands hang in the space between their chairs. Minseok gave Jongdae a small smile. They were snapped out of their trance by Baekhyun clicking his fingers in front of their faces. “Sorry, what?” Minseok looked at the others.

“We said what are you doing after school today?” Luhan asked. Minseok looked at Jongdae, wondering what to tell them. “Um, nothing?” Minseok replied, gaze flickering to Luhan.

“We were wondering if you wanted to hang out” Jongin commented.

“Oh, sure” Minseok agreed after Jongdae gave his hand a squeeze. He looked back to Jongdae, wondering if that invitation was for him too. “What about you?” He whispered, leaning closer to the other.

“It’s fine, I can do homework” Jongdae commented softly.

“Wait, we meant you as well” Yifan stated, overhearing Jongdae.

“You did?” Jongdae blinked in surprise.

“Of course, we aren’t going to leave you out” Junmyeon commented.

“Oh” Jongdae spoke quietly.

“Oh? Do we normally leave you out?” Baekhyun asked.

“Um, no” Jongdae shook his head before looking down at the table. Realisation hit Baekhyun.

“I’m so sorry!” He blurted. Jongdae looked up sharply.

“What?” He blinked.

“When we took Minseok out, we didn’t take you with us” Baekhyun commented.

“When was this?” Junmyeon asked.

“Ah, the other day” Baekhyun said off-handed, trying to down play it. “It wasn’t anything major” He added.

“Yeah, we just went to the bubble tea shop and then Baekhyun’s to watch films” Chanyeol piped up.

“You went to Baekhyun’s?” Kyungsoo clarified. Chanyeol nodded, oblivious to his boyfriend who was frantically trying to tell him to say no. Baekhyun sighed and swatted Chanyeol’s shoulder. “You-!” Kyungsoo broke off, glaring at Baekhyun.

“What’s wrong with that?” Jongin asked.

“He told me that I couldn’t come and see him because his house was being painted” Kyungsoo replied. The others chuckled.

“And you believed him?” Jongin commented. Kyungsoo folded his arms and looked down at the table. 

“Have they only left you out that one time?” Yifan asked, wondering if his friend was upset by it.

“Yeah, it didn’t even matter” Jongdae mumbled. Minseok exhaled tiredly, knowing that it was yet another lie, though this time it wasn’t directed at him.

“Then it’s settled” Junmyeon declared. “We’re all going out after school!” He added.

-

Tiredness had long since settled in Minseok, making each step he took feel like he was lead, it was taking more energy than he had. He glanced at Jongdae next to him, wondering why he was so tired and if the other felt the same. “Are you tired?” He whispered, not wanting the others in front to hear them.

“Not really, are you?” Jongdae replied.

“I’m ready to sleep the weekend away” Minseok commented.

“You sleeping the weekend away? Why do I get the idea that you’re exaggerating?” Jongdae chuckled.

“It’s not my fault you’re lazy” Minseok replied, giving the younger a playful shove.

“So you thought you’d push me into the road? Thanks” Jongdae stated sarcastically.

“Push you into the road?” Minseok swallowed nervously, his pace slowing to a stop. Jongdae froze, scolding himself for being an idiot, reminding himself that the male in front of him had no parents because of a damn car crash. “I didn’t mean to make you think of that” Jongdae said quietly, stepping closer to the elder as the others continued on oblivious. “I’m sorry, I wasn’t thinking” He added.

“No, its fine, I shouldn’t have thought about it” Minseok shook his head, trying to clear his thoughts.

“I’m an idiot” Jongdae muttered.

“That you are, but not because of that” Minseok joked, trying to lighten the mood.

“I’m an idiot in general” Jongdae agreed.

“Guys!” Junmyeon called from down the road, having only just realised they were missing two people. Jongdae wordlessly took Minseok’s hand, despite the others watching, before catching up to them. “Sorry, we got distracted” Jongdae gave a sheepish smile. Minseok nodded numbly, Jongdae was holding his hand, in front of everyone. He could feel the butterflies in his stomach before he felt the heat in his cheeks. Everyone continued walking, feigning ignorance to the hand holding.

When they arrived at their destination, they stared up at the sign on the door. “Dammit Junmyeon! You made us walk all this way and it’s closed!” Chanyeol complained.

“I didn’t know!” Junmyeon defended himself.

“Why didn’t you check?” Luhan asked.

“I didn’t think to” Junmyeon sighed, having only wanted to spend time with the others.

“You sound like Yixing” Zitao muttered.

“Hey!” Yixing began but lost his words. “I do not, not think, I do!” He decided to phrase it awkwardly, it was better than nothing.

“Sure” Zitao replied sarcastically.

“Where should we go instead?” Kyungsoo asked, cutting in before the two could argue.

“Let’s go to Yifan’s” Chanyeol stated.

“Why mine?” Yifan asked.

“Because your house is one of the biggest” Baekhyun commented.

“Junmyeon’s is bigger!” Yifan replied before looking at Jongin and Zitao who were holding back laughter. “I don’t want to hear it you two” He added.

“Hear what?” Zitao asked innocently.

“Don’t even try it” Yifan instructed.

“Did you want to go to mine?” Junmyeon offered. The others debated on it for a few minutes before agreeing and setting off in the direction of his house.

“My feet hurt” Sehun complained as they slipped their shoes off once they were inside Junmyeon’s.

“Doesn’t everyone’s?” Baekhyun muttered. They all collapsed onto the sofas and chairs around the living room.

“Let’s watch a horror film” Sehun suggested.

“No” Junmyeon shot the idea down.

“Why not a normal film? One that isn’t going to make anyone cry or feel sick” Baekhyun replied.

“A comedy?” Minseok suggested. Jongdae looked over at him, noting that the elder would probably be asleep within the first five minutes of the film.

The comedy film had been rolling for fifteen minutes before Minseok’s head had fallen onto Jongdae’s shoulder. Someone began poking Jongdae’s other shoulder, causing Jongdae to turn and meet Luhan’s gaze. “Is he asleep?” Luhan whispered, pointing at Minseok. Jongdae nodded. “Why is he so tired?” Luhan asked. Jongdae shrugged his free shoulder, making sure not to jostle Minseok. Luhan turned back to the television, lips pursing as he thought about it. Jongdae let out a quiet breath before leaning his head on top of Minseok’s, eyes falling closed, oblivious to the two nervous eyes that looked up, trying to see him.

Jongdae felt someone shaking him, rather hurriedly, pulling him from his sleep. “What?” He mumbled, rubbing his eyes.

“Wake up” Minseok’s face was close to his.

“Why?” Jongdae blinked.

“Your phone won’t stop ringing” Minseok replied. Jongdae pulled his phone out of his pocket, seeing that he had six missed calls from his father. His eyebrows furrowed. What does he want? Knowing there was a reason behind the calls. He quickly excused himself and walked out into the hallway, hitting redial. It was answered after the second ring. “Jongdae?” His father’s voice came through the phone.

“Hello?” Jongdae replied.

“Why haven’t you been answering your phone?” His father asked.

“I was asleep” Jongdae stated.

“Oh, anyway, are you going to visit your mother?” His father replied bluntly. Jongdae blinked.

“What?” He didn’t know what to say.

“Are you going to visit her? She phoned today, asked to see you” His father stated.

“But… Why?” Jongdae asked.

“I don’t know, she said something about having a talk with you” His father commented. “Now are you going to go and see her soon or not?” He added.

“Uh, sure” Jongdae replied before hearing the click of his father hanging up on him. Jongdae rubbed the side of his face, already deciding that agreeing to go was a bad idea. What if she yelled at him for being a useless son? His mind began swimming with questions, questions he didn’t want an answer to. Minseok gave him a concerned look as he sat back down. Jongdae shook his head and mouthed ‘later’. After the second film, they both decided to leave, quickly saying goodbye before leaving. When Junmyeon’s house disappeared from sight, which took some time, Minseok spoke. “What happened?”

“It was my father” Jongdae replied. “Mother phoned him and said that she wanted to see me” He added.

“She did?” Minseok looked at Jongdae in surprise.

“Yeah, I have no idea why though” Jongdae commented, answering Minseok’s next question.

“When were you thinking of going?” Minseok asked instead.

“I don’t know” Jongdae replied.

When they arrived home, Minseok was still tired, more so than before, even becoming tired of smiling. His cheeks were actually beginning to hurt as a result. They both agreed on going to straight to sleep, letting Minseok give in to his tiredness and curl up in Jongdae’s arms as the younger kept a secure hold on him. As Minseok succumbed to sleep, Jongdae decided that he was one person that he was willing to let see behind the mask completely.

-

When they woke the next morning, their eyes fluttered open at the same time. “Morning” Jongdae smiled at Minseok who gave a tired smile in reply before climbing off the bed and strolling to the bathroom. Jongdae forced himself out of bed before walking downstairs, going to get started on breakfast. Minseok appeared a few minutes later, still clad in his pyjamas. “What did you want to do today?” Minseok asked, sliding into a chair at the kitchen table.

“I don’t know” Jongdae shrugged as he stood in front of the cooker. “Are you feeling any better after yesterday when you were tired?” He asked.

“Yes, I’m just getting tired of plastering a smile on all the time” Minseok replied.

“How about” Jongdae began, an idea forming in his head. “We go out today?” He added.

“Sure” Minseok agreed.

“Without our masks?” Jongdae suggested. Minseok stared at him wide eyed.

“Are you serious?” He asked.

“Yes, come on, it might make you feel better” Jongdae replied.

“No, it’s a bad idea” Minseok stated.

“It isn’t! Think about it, no pretending, nothing. Just ourselves” Jongdae commented, walking over to Minseok.

“Just ourselves?” Minseok looked down at the table, it sounded quite tempting, though he couldn’t. What if someone saw who wasn’t Jongdae? Jongdae could tell that the elder was worrying. He took Minseok’s hands in his own. “Just one time?” Jongdae said quietly. Minseok looked down at their hands before his gaze flickered up to Jongdae’s eyes, the sincerity that shone in his eyes told Minseok that he was being painfully honest. “Sure” Minseok gave a small nod.

“Really?” Jongdae perked up at the acceptance.

“Yes, but if I get uncomfortable with it-” Minseok was cut off.

“If you get uncomfortable then tell me and you can put your mask straight back on and we’ll come home” Jongdae interrupted him. He let go of Minseok’s hands and went back to making breakfast.

After they had eaten and gotten ready, they paused in front of the door. “Ready? In three we both have to let go of our masks, ok?” Jongdae watched Minseok nervously. They both may have been revealing themselves slowly, but this would reveal everything right this second. Minseok nodded and took a deep breath. “Three” Jongdae breathed in. “Two” He could feel his anxiousness growing. “One” He swallowed. “Go” He released the breath he had been holding, as did Minseok and they both looked at each other with completely open faces. Minseok’s eyes no longer shielded the pain hiding there and Jongdae’s didn’t obscure the tiredness and frustration. “I’m Kim Minseok” Minseok gave a small smile and Jongdae had to try not to grin, it was the most genuine one he had seen so far.

“I’m Kim Jongdae” Jongdae replied. They both watched the other, committing their true selves to memory before either one could put their mask back up. “Can I be honest?” Jongdae asked to which Minseok nodded in reply. “You look amazing without a mask” He admitted quietly. “All those painted emotions don’t even come close to that small smile” He added. Minseok felt his cheeks flush.

“Thank you” He mumbled. “You don’t look so bad yourself” He added. Jongdae gave a small laugh.

“So where do you want to go Kim Minseok?” Jongdae asked as a small smile fell into place on his own lips.

“What about a coffee shop? Oh! A park! No, the mall! Ah, town!” Minseok began to reel off place after place.

“Let’s go to all of them!” Jongdae replied, cutting Minseok off before he could begin listing countries. “Let’s start with the park” He added. Minseok nodded before they walked out. Jongdae felt his hand brush Minseok’s as they made their way towards the park, he decided to take hold of the other’s hand and give it a light squeeze before meeting Minseok’s surprised gaze. “Why does it have to be cold?” Minseok mumbled as they reached the park. They walked in silence for a few minutes, something that was no longer uncommon for the pair. Minseok squeezed Jongdae’s hand, making the younger’s breathing catch as a result. “Thank you” Minseok said quietly.

“For what?” Jongdae asked.

“Staying beside me” Minseok replied. “No one ever has and I didn’t know how much longer I could’ve gone on without someone, I’m thankful that it’s you” He added.

“I… I suppose I should thank you too, you know” Jongdae commented.

“Why?” Minseok asked as he turned to face Jongdae.

“You’re currently seeing behind my mask, aren’t you? No one else has ever even tried” Jongdae replied.

“Just don’t go putting it back up too quickly” Minseok stated.

“Only if you do that too” Jongdae commented.

“We can try” Minseok replied before continuing to walk.

“I never thought I would become close to someone” Jongdae confessed.

“I never thought someone would find me” Minseok admitted. They both glanced at each other, Minseok idly wondering if this could be considered a date before flushing and shaking his head to clear his thoughts of such trivial matters.

“How about that coffee now?” Jongdae looked over at Minseok just as he shivered. Minseok nodded and so they turned around and headed towards the city centre.

They found an empty table at their favourite little coffee shop and so they quickly slid into the two seats with their drinks. The familiar silence settled upon them, neither one wanting to ruin the serene moment. Though Jongdae managed to find his voice to ruin it.

“So how do you feel without your mask?” Jongdae asked.

“I… I feel quite vulnerable if I’m honest, I don’t know if I like it” Minseok admitted. “I guess it’s better than smiling when everything’s falling down?” He added. “What about you?”

“I’m just tired of keeping up appearances, you know? I feel like I should be charging people for a show” Jongdae didn’t really know how to voice his thoughts.

“We would be billionaires” Minseok stated, joining in on trying to lighten the mood.

“Minnie, can I ask you something?” Jongdae asked, causing Minseok to subconsciously hold his breath. “Do you think it’s wrong of me not to want to visit my mother?” He asked. Minseok felt his heart drop.

“No, you have a valid reason” Minseok replied, remembering that he couldn’t hide how he felt, not when they were meant to be so open, he had been hoping for a different question.

“If I go… Will you go with me?” Jongdae asked.

“If you want me to” Minseok stated.

“I don’t think I’d be able to go otherwise” Jongdae commented. Minseok nodded in understanding before sipping his drink.

“So after this, how about the mall?” Minseok asked.

“Sure, it’s on the way to town anyway” Jongdae replied.

“I haven’t been anywhere near town since the accident” Minseok admitted.

“I only go when I’m with the others usually” Jongdae commented before draining his cup.

“Ready?” Minseok chuckled, watching Jongdae wipe the corners of his mouth. Jongdae nodded before flashing him a smile. Minseok chuckled as he got up and grabbed the cups.

“What are you doing?” Jongdae asked.

“I’m taking them up to the counter” Minseok replied. Jongdae nodded, beginning to walk out as Minseok went up to the counter and placing them down.

“Thank you! Enjoy the rest of your date!” The male behind the counter smiled widely at him. Minseok gave them a smile back before quickly walking out, nearly bumping into Jongdae. “Where’s the fire?” Jongdae asked.

“Come on” Minseok mumbled, beginning to walk in the direction of the shopping mall.

“What’s wrong?” Jongdae asked.

“Nothing” Minseok replied.

“Minnie” Jongdae stopped walking. Minseok knew what he was doing, he wasn’t going to move until he told him what was wrong.

“Nothing’s wrong, it’s just the guy in there said enjoy the rest of your date” Minseok stated quietly.

“He thought we’re on a date?” Jongdae thought about it.

“That’s what he said” Minseok replied.

“He must think we would make a good couple then” Jongdae commented, this caused Minseok’s steps to falter.

“What?” He said numbly.

“Don’t you think we would?” Jongdae asked. Minseok gulped. Was this really happening? He wondered whether to pinch himself or not.

“I-I don’t know” Minseok replied before continuing to walk. “Do you?” He asked.

“I’ve never thought about it” Jongdae stated. In all honestly, he never really had thought about it, though thinking about it now, he didn’t dislike the idea, rather the opposite.

Minseok felt his shoulders droop a little, obviously the other wasn’t thinking like he was. “I guess we’ll never know” He commented. Jongdae frowned at him. Did he just get rejected?

They reached the mall, both still thinking about the conversation from moments ago. Minseok walked around with a heavy heart, not really interested in shopping anymore. Jongdae had grown confused, unsure of what Minseok had meant by his earlier comment. He was also beginning to wonder about what it would be like to date Minseok. The idea was definitely appealing to him, it would mean that he wouldn’t need an excuse to stay beside the elder, he could be with him simply because he could. As he wandered about in his Minseok-induced daze, he neglected to realise that he had left said person in a shop. Minseok only noticed the other’s disappearance a little while later, after shifting through a clothes rack. He looked around panicked, noting that the other was no longer in the same shop so he walked out quickly, trying to find the other in amongst the other shoppers but it was no use, he couldn’t see him anywhere. He felt like hitting himself, he had left his phone at home, not wanting it to ruin the outing. He found a bench nearby and sat down, figuring Jongdae would come looking for him.

Jongdae had found himself entering another shop, he looked around before his gaze landed on a glass counter. Wandering over to it he noticed a display stand on top of the counter with various bracelets attached to it. He looked down at them, thinking that the infinity symbol on one seemed to suit all the times he had told the elder that he would never leave him, maybe this would reinforce it? Maybe it would show him that he meant what he said and that he was determined to stick to his promise. “You know, these make brilliant couple bracelets” A voice said sweetly from behind the counter. Jongdae looked up.

“They do?” He was beginning to wonder whether he should back away slowly and walk out, he wasn’t even with the other and yet he still felt the woman behind the counter was referring to him.

“Yes, you can pick either the same colour or different matching colours” The woman gave him a smile. Jongdae bit his lip, wondering if this would end badly for him before giving a small smile, it might even cheer the elder up. Are you really going to buy one just to cheer him up? Remembering the times when they had woke up in the morning together, when they had watched films together and Minseok had talked about falling, when they were there for one another, he decided to buy them. Was he being blind? What if he was missing something? He was unsure why people referring to them as couple was affecting him so much. He knew that when he was around the other everything seemed to calm down, seemed to become manageable and sure he had wanted to get close to the other, get him to open up but that didn’t mean he loved him. He tried telling himself that he didn’t love the way the older male shared small smiles with him, he didn’t love the way his hand felt in his and he didn’t love the way he would snuggle closer to him when they slept but a part of him seemed to break away, falling straight into the others lap, without him even noticing. He had never realised how much he had treasured those moments.

He remembered where he was, noticing the woman giving him a concerned look. He shook himself mentally before pulling his wallet out, quickly checking the price before handing her the exact amount. “Which colours would you like?” She asked. He looked over them, they must have had every colour he could think of, in different shades too. He pointed to two, thinking they would match. “Nice choice, no one’s ever put them two together, Persian blue and blue-violet” She commented. Jongdae smiled at her, thinking they were just purple and blue. He took the small bag from her, quickly stuffing it into his coat before walking out and trying to find Minseok. It wasn’t difficult, said male was sat on a bench opposite the store, his hands were in his pockets as he stared at the floor. “How long have you been sat there?” Jongdae asked, stepping in front of the elder.

“A while” Minseok shrugged.

“I’m sorry” Jongdae apologised as Minseok stood up.

“Its fine, I think” Minseok paused, looking away from Jongdae. “I want to go home” He said quietly. Jongdae nodded, understanding that he was probably upset at him for vanishing.

They began walking back, Jongdae growing excited at the prospect of giving one of the bracelets to Minseok whilst the other wanted to just go home and sleep. Jongdae purposefully made his hand brush Minseok’s, shifting closer so he could take the other’s hand. Well that had been his plan before the other moved his hands, tucking them into his pockets again. Jongdae looked down at the ground as he walked, wondering if he had really hurt the other, why was he avoiding him?

Minseok sighed, it had been a bad idea, he had said it that morning and he had thought it when he had begun living with Jongdae. He almost wished he could go back in time and listen to himself, almost. He cared too much about the younger male to want to go back. After unlocking the door, he slipped his coat off and hung it up before stepping out of his shoes. He began to walk upstairs. “Where are you going?” Jongdae asked. Minseok turned around on the stairs.

“I’m going to bed” He replied.

“It’s three in the afternoon” Jongdae commented.

“I don’t care” Minseok stated before continuing upstairs. Jongdae felt panic rising within him, Minseok was beginning to shut him out. He dropped his coat on the floor, retrieving the bag before following Minseok. “Wait” Jongdae held his hand out to catch the older male, even just his short sleeve, but it was too late, the other had shut the door in his face. Jongdae looked at the door sadly, it meant he wouldn’t be able to talk to the other. He stepped back and opted to sit on the top step, waiting for the other to emerge. It never happened.

Jongdae felt his head drooping, eyes falling closed before remembering he was at the top of the stairs and shaking himself. He hadn’t checked the time for quite a while, all he knew was that he had been there for long enough. He climbed to his feet, going back to stand in front of Minseok’s bedroom door. Slowly pushing it open, he peered inside, noting that Minseok was fast asleep. He stepped inside and quickly approached the bed. He took the blue bracelet out of the bag and leant over the bed, reaching for Minseok’s wrist before securing the bracelet. He stepped back, grabbed the bag with the remaining one in and walked out, closing the door quietly behind himself. He flicked lights off as he went, noting that it was now seven o’clock. Lying down on the sofa, he dropped the bag onto the coffee table and closed his eyes.

Hello again! I feel as though I haven't updated this in ages but I'm here now! I tried to make this longer to make up for the lateness... Apologies for any mistakes, I've gone over it but knowing me I've probably missed something.

Though I can now officially say that I feel bad for being a silent reader... So many of you are so quiet T_T

Don't be a stranger! ^^