I don’t know what had gotten into me. Why I’m so crazy about this person. I guess cupid’s arrow really hit me hard deep when I met him. He looked so innocent and vulnerable, but he wasn’t what he seemed to be. He was far from that. It wasn’t easy to ask him out on a date. But I’m a persistent person. The type of person who puts a lot of effort into something, so I always get what I want. I asked him on a date countless times. But he wouldn’t even look at me. I followed him. He still didn’t bother to look at me. I even tried to sleep on his doorstep, begging for a chance, finally getting his attention.

“I will go out with you, but only if you change your hairstyle. I don’t want to see your forehead.” Those were the first words he spoke to me. That wasn’t endearing at all. I loved him. I knew I loved him. I loved him so much, so I let it pass. The next day I changed my hairstyle. It was a little uncomfortable since I was used to spiking my hair, but because of him I changed it. I tried to just simply brush my hair. My bangs fell and I let them cover my forehead which he disliked. I showed up with my new hairstyle. And I guessed he was pleased. He gave me a pleased smile and then looked at me from head to toe, probably looking for something to ridicule.

“I guess you’re not that bad anymore.” He was the only person to ever say that to me, but I let it pass again. I wanted to date him.

“So will you go on a date with me?” I asked him tentatively. He just chuckled at my uncoolness. I was cool, but he melted all the ice in me ever since the day he stole my heart and now I was so helpless.

“Sure.” I sighed in relief as soon as I heard him. I heard him giggle and I swear that it was a giggle that sounded like a girl.

On our first date, I asked him out for a movie. I waited for him for four hours outside the theater. He asked me to wait for him there instead of picking him up. I agreed and didn’t expect I would be waiting for him for long. It was too cold, but I didn’t mind. I’d wait for him even if it took a week. When he came, he apologized, saying it was the traffic jam that kept him on the road. I easily let it pass, consoling myself that it was better to be late than to ditch me on our first date. I would remember that day when I heard him laugh, because of the movie we watched. I swear I was paying more attention on him than the movie. I can’t it. I love staring at him.

Days passed since he became my boyfriend. I didn’t know what really happened, how it happened, but I was happy he was finally mine. He was mine. Just a word. I was more like a puppet to him. Even though he stated that I was his boyfriend, it didn’t seem that way. He was constantly ditching our dates because of some excuses. He never told his friends that I was his boyfriend. He always said I was his friend. Sometimes I would just let pass like usual, but sometimes I couldn’t bear it. It was just too much. It really pained me when he denied me and I couldn’t even say I was his boyfriend because I felt that I didn’t have a right to. How can I scream he was mine when he was already denying me? I didn’t complain how he treated me, but I was getting tired of it. Begging for his love was the hardest thing I ever did. I forgot the existence of my ego. I threw away my pride. Sometimes I wanted to hit my head on the wall to wake myself up from this awful dream.

“I’m sorry I couldn’t tell them you’re my boyfriend. I just broke up with my ex. I don’t want them to think I’m desperate.”

Rebound. My mind screamed, but I quickly suppressed the thought. He was looking at me with puppy eyes and a pout. His irresistible aegyo always killed me. Who could resist that look? I couldn’t resist him. He was impossible to resist. I always melted when he gave me that look.

After that day, nothing changed. He kept denying me and I didn’t think he had any plans to announce our relationship. He flirted with every other guy. I hated to see it. No one knew how much I wanted to pull him away from those guys. No one knew how much it hurt to see someone you loved flirting with another guy. No one knew how much blood my heart lost. No one knew how my heart shuttered. Not even him. I tried to smile despite my pain, but it killed me deep inside. I didn’t want to feel the pain anymore. I guess I was finally awake without hitting my head on the wall. I was tired of trying. I was tired of being fooled. I was giving up on him. If he didn’t love me, then I shouldn’t force him to. I had to learn how to give up. I had to let go in order to lessen the things weighing on me.

“Let’s go to the club.” I heard one of his friend’s scream from the top of his lungs. As though it wasn’t loud enough to break my eardrum.

“Woo, you should come. I heard Doojoon is coming. It’s your chance to date him.” Wooyoung looked at me and I looked back at him. I kept my face expressionless. I wouldn’t show how much I was breaking. He really loved to see me break and I wouldn’t like to count this day. His friends looked at me as well then at Woo, waiting for his response.

“Are you coming?”

“Uhm..sure.”

I swallowed hard. That’s all I needed to hear. His friend left the two of us after his confirmation. I composed myself as much as I could. I kept silent and pondered on what to say. There would be no reason to hold no now. I can’t force myself to like someone, but I can tell myself I deserve better and try to move on.

“Uhm..Khun..”

“It’s ok. Just go. Just like what you say, we’re friends so I don’t have a right to stop you.” He was shocked hearing what I said. His mouth agape in shock and stared at me as though I did something unbelievable. He probably didn’t expect me to say those words, but I did. I reached my limit. Somehow I was relieved. I finally said something that would get me out of my situation. Without looking at him, I walked away. I was afraid if I looked at him I would forget whatever I said and be a fool again.

I didn’t show up after that day. I didn’t go to school either knowing it would be inevitable to see him. He tried to call but i ignored it. I didn’t open his messages. By that time, there was only one thing on my mind. Move on. During my miserable days, I had Tiffany by my side. She took care of me and I was glad because she still cared for me despite the many rejections she got from me. I didn’t think it was right, but the only way to cure love is another love and there was nothing wrong if I gave us a chance. Gave her a chance and myself a chance. With Tiffany, I was able to finally return to school and meet him. I thought I was quite ready but there was still anxiety in me, but I needed to attend school. I was just hoping I wouldn’t bump into him somewhere in school. But then I remembered that almost all the classes I took were the same as his. So unfortunate.

I walked Tiffany to her class and headed to first period. I couldn’t shake off my nervousness as I was nearing the classroom. I tried to calm myself by breathing deeply before I entered the class. I didn’t expect his eyes would be the first thing I would see. I was mentally frozen, but I tried real hard to pull myself together. I averted my eyes from his and went straight to my seat which was right next to him. I felt his eyes on me, but I kept mine focused on the front of the classroom, avoiding his stare. I wanted the clock to move faster, but what happened was just the opposite. Time was moving slowly. So I kept my cool. When the class ended, I quickly excused myself from the room, but I felt something tug on my shirt.

“Khun..” My ears perked up with just him calling my name. I couldn’t avoid him now. Not even now that he was holding my hand. “Can we talk?”

“Nichkhun!!” I sighed in relief when I saw Tiffany running towards us. She was flailing her hands. I waved to her and smiled slipping my hand from Woo’s grip. “Khun..let’s have lunch together.” Usually I would ask Wooyoung, but not this time. I was moving on. I was moving on with Tiffany’s help. I grabbed Tiffany’s hand and interlocked our fingers.

“Uhm..sorry Woo I can’t talk to you right now. Maybe we could some other time.” I smiled and turned my back to him. I didn’t understand the expression on his face, but it hurt me to see it. He didn’t say anything, but I could feel his eyes on me. I felt guilty, but why would I? I didn’t do anything wrong. Did I? Ugh. He really messed with my head. That’s what he did best. I shouldn’t have come to school so soon, but it’s too late to think of that. I was going to move on and he would just be a beautiful mistake

It's finally done here's first chapter. This chapter is basically on Nichkhun's POV. Next chapter will be on Woo's. Hence you'll know his side. I will probably update it tomorrow so see y'all tomorrow~

Btw..thank you mel for editing this fic..kkk~ I know you're busy but you still give some of your time to edit this. Thank you so much^^