Over time you can return to the top of the circle. Things are back to their place, and develop normally as before – when nothing has to happen to create a whole new thing – while dreams are now what I don’t want, the lies means something  - they hurt and cut my heart in pieces – and the memories I treasure vanish magically – like angels that no longer sing and are hiding in hell -

It’s like a movie, with a beginning and an end that is not open to the options – because there are not options anymore – playing it  over and over again in just a masochistic satisfaction borned from hatred itself – and foreign -

The days, months and weeks had passed – I count the hours, minutes and seconds that resonate in my head every time I’m near a clock  – things change – bloom – things are different and yet the same – they are strange -

Our worlds are separated again – never were one – but my person seems to keep running to catch up - I keep myself behind him beyond the cruel fate that divides us – as my reflection not accept my decision to let him go and continue with our lives – forming a new bottle with glass fragments that are scattered along the way - the pieces that I left there the last time I went through that area.

My heart will go on after all, perhaps weaker than before – or stronger, I’m not sure – but still there… hidden, unconscious, hopeful – maybe -

“Jiyong Hyung...”

But the stares have not stopped, as the concerned and anxious smile full of pity that I receive from my “friends”.  Like the one Seungri giving me this time.

it’s sad to think that I can´t stop them – because my smile faded away and my eyes no longer shine – cuz my reflection took everything with it until I choose to raise our hands again… write another promise on our skin and swear him that the disappointment that he feels will be the last. That Jiyong will never be hurt again, that G-dragon will be there to help – or something -

It’s part of the circle I run again – this time alone – I though. As the youngest of the group wrapped me in his arms and my hair, my head resting in his chest – hearing a strange heartbeat, one that I not desire – lost in the whispers over the other side of the room than in the actions of my friend.

It’s desire what is shining in his eyes, I told myself when Lee Seunghyun left his place near me to go with the others – as always – leaving me in the dark of the moon and the pained smile of my reflection on the other side of the room.

An opportunity, I said aloud as my fingers touched – as several months ago – the icy fingers of my other self. An opportunity, he repeated, pressing lightly the grip of our fingers and pretending a calm smile. We need him. I said. My forehead pressed against it while my eyes were close tightly. No!! No!!

“Jiyong?..”

My reflection shook his head and I nodded. Both silent while I lean back comfortably against him.  The moonlight shining upon us in this dark room. The coldness of his body counteracting mine. The warm breeze of a spring night freely hovering around us.

I need him, I whispered. And he let me free, his eyes covered in rage. We need it, I repeat this time without any hint of conviction in my voice, biting my bottom lip to hold back the tears as his fingers caress my cheek.

 “G...”

 “You want him?”  I uttered no sound. Do you need him, Jiyong?, he asked with narrowed eyes and slightly tightening the grip of our hands. Anger still not vanished from his eyes, disappointment appeared again...

“Ji?”

“G..” I whispered, turning off the echo of the voice of Seunghyun at the other side of the door. Completely ignoring the butterflies fluttering inside me. “I’m sorry” I spoke  with dry lips. He just smile at me and kissed my cheek before turn his back at me again. T.O.P stare him as Seunghyun stare at me. Both in silence.

“I’m going back to my apartment, I came to say goodbye, the other gone so...”

“Want to eat with me, Hyun?”

“Do you?” G-dragon smiling inwardly as TOP. I just nodded my head as I stood and walked toward the kitchen to prepare dinner. Seunghyun followed me in silence, measuring the uncomfortable atmosphere at some point emerged between us.

It was like the times when our worlds were united, but the feeling is different now. It’s like the first night he kissed me, but now I feel nothing. It’s like the first time he wrapped his arms around my waist, just like now...

“Ji..”

His breath against my neck, his smell and warm bright me back memories. The same that had disappeared  months ago. Along with feelings like butterflies fluttering around me – flying past my eyes and hiding in the moonlight – his  smile shut down my fears, and the desire in his eyes silenced my cry – no sobbing, salted drops have dried – the flight of the butterflies it’s gone...

The loneliness of others is stronger than loneliness itself, I though. His fingers intertwined with mine, his lips pressing on mines. Its going back to what we were, what I don’t want -  to see lies in front on me again – dreams that doesn’t come true because the destiny doesn’t want them to be real… what I fear. It’s knowing that I failed once when I tried to change the fate, what scares me and repress me – a large cracks in a bottle almost new -

“I’m afraid, Hyun...”

They are pretty words, I though. They are nice words what I hope could escape from his lips. No matter if they are not real anymore, but I want it. Those words that people said to calm the soul, comfort the spirit – shut down the cry – and keep me from falling.

“Ji...” he whispered in my ear, pulling me back against his body into a tight hug – full of what I conscious and badly threw before – full of what my reflection took away from me to protect me – to protect himself – before kiss me deeply.

You want him, I said to the other side of my room. “You need him, him and nobody else” he whispered with a smile plastered in his face as he leaned in TOP`s arms around his body. And I simple nodded, taking refuge in the arms of the man I give myself again. Hoping that the dream didn’t end there – that I didn’t wake up with tears in my eyes – that I finally do not have to wake up alone again...

“Try, Ji...”

And I let myself fall…

A.N: and the final~~ to the readers...i hope you have liked it.