[Your POV]

 

After visiting Kikwang’s grave, I went to his apartment. Once a while, I stopped by here and clean the house. Today on the other hand, I wasn’t planning to clean the house. Suddenly I just felt like coming here. Sitting inside’s Kikwang’s room, I looked around. Nothing had change. It still looks like how it used to look when Kikwang is still alive. I didn’t let anyone touched anything in this house. Kikwang’s umma handed this house to me. She said that Kikwang would want me to have it. Besides, she couldn’t bear to step in the house where her son died. I understand it. At first I was like her but thinking about how hard Kikwang work to buy this house, I change my mind. He said this house will be for us when we get marry. And when we have children, he’ll buy a bigger house for us to live happily ever after. How much I wish that will come true. 

 

I got up and walked around Kikwang’s room. Our picture together still hangs inside his room. All the present I ever gave to him is still sitting neatly inside his room. I walked towards his closet. Slowly I opened it. His cloths are still arranged neatly. From his favorite shirt until his suite that he only wear for formal occasion. I touched it one by one. The image of Kikwang’s wearing all that stuff appeared in my mind. I smiled. There isn’t a thing he didn’t wear in this closet. He wears every single one of it. Even the one he doesn’t like. He said that the cloth might feel sad if he doesn’t wear em’. I always found it stupid but I ended up doing the same now.

 

After a while, I founded a blue shirt folded neatly than the others. I took it out and sat on the bed while looking at the shirt. It was Kikwang’s favorite shirt. I gave it to him on his last birthday before he died. He always loves to wear this shirt. Sometime he felt guilty towards the other shirt because he kept wearing this one. I laughed every time he said that. It was so cute and funny of him to said stuff like that. Then he would pout because I laugh at him. And I would have to make him smile again and the only way to do that is by kissing him. Kissing him always feel like a heaven for me. My heart still beats so fast even when we already dated for three years. It was rather weird actually.

        

“Kikwang-ah, bogo shippoyo! Neaomu bogo shippoyo!” Without me realizing, I was already crying so badly while clutching on Kikwang’s short. I really miss him.

“Why did you leave me? You said you’ll always be here with me but why aren’t you here now? Wea yo Kikwang-ah?! Wea yo?!” My cries become harder. Yes I have live without Kikwang before but that was when I didn’t know him. Now that he became apart of me, how could I survive without him. Why does he have to live me? Why is God so cruel to me? Why does He have to take Kikwang away?

 

As I was crying terribly, suddenly I felt a hand touched my shoulder. I quickly turned around and saw no one. The touched was soft yet powerful. I know that touch. It’s Kikwang’s. I could never forget how his touch feels like. It is strong, soft and full of warmth.  

 “Kikwang-ah! Are you here?” I knew this is stupid but deep inside of me I could feel Kikwang’s presence. It was as if he was in front of me. Looking at me.

“~~~~~~~~-ah? Chagiya?” A tiny voice whispered in my ears. It’s Kikwang’s voice! My eyes widened.

“Kikwang-ah?” I called his name but nothing happens. What is going on with me?

“Am I going crazy?” I asked myself.

“I don’t know what’s going on but if you’re here Kikwang-ah, than why can’t I see you? I miss you so much do you know? I felt like dying.” I know I sound like a crazy people but I don’t care. There might be a chance that maybe Kikwang is here. If not the real him, even his spirit is enough for me.

“If dying is the only way for me to see you again, then I’ll do it.” I really meant it. If that’s the only way for me to see you again Kikwang, I’ll do it.

 

I stared at the blank place for a while. After almost an hour, only than I realized what’s going on. I quickly shook everything off. I couldn’t be like this. What happens before is just a hallucination. I cannot act this way. This is not how Kikwang wants me to live. I have to be happy for him. I have to live so that his spirit will rest in peace. There are still things that I need to do for Kikwang. I have loads of responsibilities now. Not only for me but also for Kikwang’s. In order to do everything, I have to stay healthy and live. After everything is settled, only than Kikwang will me truly in peace. And only than will I’m able to continue my life like how he wanted me too.  

 

[End POV]

[Hyungseung POV]

 

“I’m home!” ~~~~~~~~ announced as she walked inside the house. I quickly ran towards her.

“Where have you been huh?”

“Somewhere. Why are you all worried?” She just acted like everything is fine.

“Yah! Of course I’m worried about you. Who knows what you might do!” I’m always so worry about ~~~~~~~~ even when I know she can take care of herself.

“Oppa, I’m fine. Don’t worry”, she assured me with a smile. I sighed in relief. I really should calm down a bit. ~~~~~~~~ is alright. She can take care of herself. I know she can.

“I worry to much, aren’t I?”

“Yup!” We both sighed and sat on the couch.

“Meet Kikwang’s parents?”

“Yup.”

“How are they?”

“Better.”

“Went to Kikwang’s grave?”

“Yup.”

“The white carnation still there?”

“Yup.”

“Went to Kikwang’s house?”

“Yup.”

“You clean it up again?”

“No.”

“Than what did you do?”

“Nothing. Just sit around.”

“Huh….. Well, get up. You need to get ready”, I got up and pulled ~~~~~~~~ up too.

“Ready? For what?” She looked at me.

“You forget didn’t you?” ~~~~~~~~ scratch her head and smiled innocently. I could only smiled and shook my head.

“To the dance competition.”

“Ah! Ok!” And she went up stairs to get ready.

 

I walked in my room and change to my outfit and fix my hair and all. Than I walked down and saw ~~~~~~~~ is already done. Wow! She’s fast. She was only wearing a white tank top with a blue jacket outside and a black skinny. She let her long hair loose and wears her favorite boots. Hmm! She has good taste in clothing just like me. hahaha! I like to compliment myself a lot don’t I? I learn it from ~~~~~~~~. She used to LOVE complimenting herself but after Kikwang’s death, she changed. It feels like I have switch personality with her. She used to be the cheerful one and I’m the serious one. But everything’s different now. I really miss my stupid clumsy little sister.

 

“Gaja!” Both of us went out. I hope ~~~~~~~ got to enjoy herself tonight. It’s been YEARS since I last saw her really smiling and laughing. Everything is always gloomy with her. Even when she laughs, it feels like she’s crying.

 

[End POV]

[Minzy POV]

 

“~~~~~~~~-AH!!” I waved my hand at her and Hyun Seung oppa when I saw them walked in the club. ~~~~~~~~ smiled and quickly pulled Hyun Seung oppa towards where I was. Hyun Seung oppa looked so dashingly handsome tonight. Actually, he looks dashingly handsome everyday! Ever since I first know him, I’d been falling for him like crazy. If only he would open his eyes wider and notice me. 

 

“Hi oppa!” I smiled cheerfully at Hyun Seung oppa.

“Oh! Hi”, I frowned at his uninterested look at me. Why wouldn’t he realize that I love him like hell?

“I leave you to here for now”, Hyun Seung oppa quickly walked away from there. My frustration becomes worst. It’s bad enough that he never think of me as a woman and now he ignore me! Can’t my life get any worst?

“Don’t worry Minzy. He’ll come around”, ~~~~~~~ smiled reassuring me and tapped my shoulder lightly.

“Will he?”

“Of course! He’s my brother. I know.”

“If you say so”, we both smiled once again and headed towards where Junho oppa was sitting at. As usual, many girls were around him but he ignores every one of it. Aish! I’m never going to get a sister-in-law this way.

 

“Sorry but I have a girlfriend”, Junho opa said to those girls and when he saw me and ~~~~~~~, he quickly took my hands.

“Here she is! She’s my girlfriend and I only love her so please leave us alone”, those girls frowned and gave this death glare at me before walking away.

“Pheww! Finally its over”, Junho oppa let go of me and smiled.

“Oppa, since when am I you’re girlfriend huh? I’m your ONE AND ONLY dongseang!”

“Mianhae Minzy-ah. I need a way to run from those girls.”

“You know, you’re abnormal!”

“I am not abnormal.”

“Yes you are! Guys like it when girls surrounded them but you hated it. Are you sure you’re a guy?” Sometimes I really wonder.

“Of course I am!”

“Then prove it!”

“How?”

“Go date someone!”

“Aish!” Junho oppa just rubbed his forehead.

“Can I just date you ~~~~~~~~-ah?” Junho oppa gave me his naughty wink. ~~~~~~~ laughed.

“Yah! Don’t bring ~~~~~~~~ into this!” She’s too good for you anyway.

“Ahjumma! Stop nagging will you?”

“Ugh!” I glared at him and sat.

 

“Attention please!” Suddenly the MC announced from somewhere.

“The dance competition is about to start. Please proceed to the main area to watch it”.

“Gaja!” The three of us quickly went to the main area where the dance competition will be held. I’m so excited! Hyun Seung oppa will participate in it with his dance students! Fighting oppa!

 

“Let us bring up our DJ of the night! Yoon Doojoon!” The MC said and a guy went up to the DJ booth. I looked at him. He’s quiet cute! That red sweat shirt he’s wearing really makes him noticeable. “~~~~~~~-ah….” I looked at ~~~~~~~ to tell her about the DJ but I was too late I guess. She was already eyeing that guy and to my surprise, she doesn’t even blink while looking at him. It was as if she was captivated by him. Huh…. 

 

“~~~~~~~!!!!” She quickly woke up from her dreaming and looked at me.

“Huh?”

“What’s wrong with you?”

“Huh? I mean nothing. I’m fine.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes. I am.”

“Ok then”, my attention drifted back to the main stage.

 

“Our first contestant would be Hyun Seung and the boys. Let’s give them a big round of applause!”

“Hyun Seung Oppa! Fighting!!” I screamed happily.

 

Hyun Seung oppa started dancing with his students and gosh it was so cool! Why can’t my brother be like Hyun Seung oppa? Cool, handsome, smart and a great dancer. Awwh! I’m falling way deeper for him now. If only he’d notice me as a women. Every time I said to Hyun Seung oppa that I like him, he would just smile and ignore it. No matter what I did, he never saw it so I decided to go search for other guys but none seems to able to knock Hyun Seung oppa from my heart. Loving someone who doesn’t love you back is hard. Aish!

 

[End POV]

[Your POV]

 

“Let us bring up our DJ of the night! Yoon Doojoon!” The MC said and a guy walked up to the DJ booth. I looked up at him and somehow my eyes were locked on him. I didn’t even blink while looking at him. A weird feeling started to develop inside me. My heart….its….its beating again. Like how it once beat for Kikwang. And somehow he felt familiar to my soul. What’s wrong with me? What is this feeling?

 

“~~~~~~~!!!!” Minzy’s voice startled me. 

“Huh?”

“What’s wrong with you?”

“Huh? I mean nothing. I’m fine.” That’s what I think.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes. I am.” I nodded.

“Ok then”, her attention went back to the dance stage where Hyun Seung oppa was dancing perfectly with his students. I tried to ignore those feelings and focus on Hyun Seung oppa’s performance but I just couldn’t. He was like a magnet that keeps on pulling my eyes to watch him.   

 

I just couldn’t keep my eyes and mind away from him. The more I tried the worst it becomes. At one point, my heart started to beat so fast that I felt like I couldn’t breathe. Again I tired to look away but then his eyes drifted towards me and our eyes locked on each other. Somehow at that moment it seems like there’s only the both of us in this whole wide world. No one else exists. It’s just me and him. A flinch of happiness was felt inside of me. What is this? Why am I like this?

 

My eyes stared at his and I saw something familiar. I saw Kikwang! It was as if looking into his eyes, I was also looking into Kikwang’s eyes. How could that be possible? Kikwang is not here anymore but why can I see him inside of this guy’s eyes. My heart started to beat like crazy again. It’s as if I saw Kikwang in front of me again. It was as if Kikwang never left. What if it’s true? What if Kikwang never left me?

 

I quickly shook the taught away and get a grip of myself. There’s no way Kikwang is inside of that guy. It’s impossible. Kikwang is dead. No matter how much I want to deny it, I can’t. It’s the truth. Like it or not, I have to accept it. Kikwang is no longer here ~~~~~~~-ah. He’s gone. You have to accept it and keep on living. That’s what Kikwang wants. Seeing you happy meant everything to him so you have to be happy for the sake of Kikwang.

 

My eyes slowly drifted away from that guy and after I did that, he also looks away and focuses back on his thing. I looked at Minzy who’s next to me. She seems to enjoy herself very much. Of course she is. When it comes to Hyun Seung oppa, everything seems like heaven for her. Just like how it was for me when Kikwang was still here. Things were so much better back then. If only I could turn back time and change everything….

 

[End POV]

[Doojoon POV]      

 

“Yo!” Junhyung came to me and tossed me a bottle of mineral water.

“Thanks”, I quickly gulp the water down my throat. It’s a busy night here at this club. People all over the region stop by here to participate in the dance competition. I heard this year the prize money was twice then last year. Guess that’s why more people decided to join in.

“Where’s Dong Woon?”

“He decided to go back home to study for his exam to morrow”, my dongseang is a nerdy guy.

“Oh!”

 

“Attention please!” Suddenly the MC announced from somewhere.

“The dance competition is about to start. Please proceed to the main area to watch it”.

“Gaja!” Both of us walked towards our respective position.

 

Since I’m the DJ for tonight’s competition, I quickly walked towards the MC. When he announced for me to get up the DJ booth, I quickly got up and I heard everyone cheered for me. Somehow this makes me felt better about myself. Knowing that I meant something to someone gave me warmth.

 

“Our first contestant would be Hyun Seung and the boys. Let’s give them a big round of applause!”

 

The first group of the night walked to the center stage. Junhyung gave me the que from the audience place and I quickly do my thing. Everyone was cheering for this first group. I have to admit that they are great. I’ve seen many people dancing here and trust me; most of them are just wannabe but these guys really is something.

 

I looked around to see the audience reaction until my eyes stopped at one figure who was looking straight at me. At that moment our eyes met and my heart started to beat wildly. Images started to flashed in my mind. What’s wrong with me? I tried to look away but I couldn’t. Our eyes were locked on each other. The more I tried, the harder my heart trembles. Somehow I felt like I don’t want to look away. Looking at her cure the emptiness I’ve always felt all this while.

 

Does she have anything to do with my past? If she does, then why is she looking like it was her first time seeing me but couldn’t look away just like me? What is going on here? Why am I acting like this? Why is she feels so important to me? Why couldn’t I let go of her image? 

 

The girl suddenly looked away. Realizing what was happening; I also look away and tried to focus on my work. It was nothing. Yoon Doojoon, just forget it. It probably was nothing at all. You’re just a bit tired. That’s all. I took a deep breath and focus back on my job.

 

[End POV]

[Your POV]

 

The competition ended fast. Hyun Seung oppa and his boys won it. I know they can do it. He is my oppa after all. Of course he would win it. Hyun Seung oppa is so far the best dancer I have ever seen. No one could beat him. Probably there is someone out there that’s better than him but in my heart, there’s only Hyun Seung oppa. One and only best dancer big brother in the world! I’m so lucky to have him as my oppa. If it wasn’t because him, I wouldn’t know how my life would turn out now.

 

Since I was little, I only have Hyun Seung oppa. Our parents were always away and I rarely meet them so my only family and guardian would be Hyun Seung oppa. He took care of me everyday even until now. When umma and appa died, Hyun Seung oppa stop schooling and started dancing really hard. Somehow he makes a career out of it and was able to support our lives. Now, we’re able to lead a simple life thanks to Hyun Seung oppa. I’m thinking of repaying his hard work on raising me up with buying him the super bike he had been longing to have since high school. I hope he’ll like it.

 

“Hey!” Hyun Seung oppa finally joined us at the table after he took his prize with someone behind him. I couldn’t see who it was because it was kinda dark in here.

“Chukahe oppa!” And as usual, Minzy would be the most excited one.

“Congrats bro. You deserve it” my two oppa lightly tapped each other back.

“Oppa, I’m so proud of you! You were excellent oppa!” like always.

“Thanks. Oh btw, this is Doojoon”, Hyun Seung oppa introduce us to the guy behind him. It’s the DJ guy. The one who’s eyes somehow reminds me of Kikwang. What is he doing here?

“Annyeonghesayo. Yoon Doojoon imnida”, he smiled at everyone as he introduces himself. I couldn’t help but to stare at him.

“You’re the DJ right?” Minzy asked and he nodded.

“Hi! I’m Minzy. This is my brother Junho and this is ~~~~~~~~. Hyun Seung oppa’s dongseang”, after Minzy introduce us to him, he shook hands with everyone and when it was my turn, both of us looked at each other.

“Doonjoon. Yoon Doojoon”, he offered his hand.

“~~~~~~~~. Jang ~~~~~~~~”, as our hand lock, I felt an electric current runs down my veins. Both of us looked up and our eyes meet again. At that moment, it feels like were the only ones in this whole wide world.

 

We stayed there for a few seconds but it felt like hours! His hand, it feels so warm and safe. It’s just like how Kikwang’s hand is. Everything about him reminds me of Kikwang. Why is it? They don’t even look alike. This is weird.

 

“Ehemm!” Minzy cought make both of us came back to the reality. We quickly pulled our hand apart.

“Nice to meet you”, I tried to sound normal but failed.

“Me too”, he flashed a smile that ALMOST took my breath away. Gosh! What’s wrong with me? That moment, the both of us gaze into each other eyes and something inside of me starting to tinkle. Like when the first I met Kikwang, I started to have butterfly in my stomach. My heart started to pound so hard. What is this? Yoon Doojoon, what have you done to me?

 

[End POV]