You POV

      A day went by and today was very different from yesterday. The weather seemed to be very bipolar In  Korea. I gazed up at the clear, bright blue sky. Not a single cloud was seen which was really strange. The brightness of the sky blinded my eyes and caused them to water which forced me to look away. I found myself outside my uncle's shabby house in his garden. I enjoyed this place because it was very different, more like peaceful and quiet. Now I understand why my mother used to love this place. Not a single thing can be heard here except my guitar's strumming and my voice. I sang a song I composed which is called Hello To myself (originally from JYP and sang by Yenny-wonder girls). The song wasn't too bad but not my best. It did give me strength though, when I needed it. I grew bored and stopped at once. I sat there enjoying the view of the beautiful garden. I suddenly thought about the first day of school which will be tomorrow. My oppa(Kyuhyun) is only one year older than me so he might show me around the school. He commented to me that many celebrities currently attend the school Hanlim Arts. I felt butterflies in my stomach and I clutched it. 

     "Aigoo...I don't know why I suddenly feel nervous..." I mumbled to myself. Honestly, I have no idea how korean schools are. Maybe I did once when I was younger, but because I have lived in America most of my life, I forgot. It makes me sad, realizing that I have forgotten half of my chilhood that happened in Korea. I sighed in fustration and grabbed the granola bar that was sitting next to me. I munched gloomily on the granola bar as I set my guitar gently on the grass. I laid on my back allowing the sun rays to hover on me while I slowly closed my eyes.

♦ 당신은 아름다워요 ♦

After what seemed forever, I finally opened my eyes. I wasn't facing the bright blue sky anymore but I found myself in the living room, watching my younger-self laying on the blood red couch. I looked around noticing that this memory was from seven years ago. I heard a familiar chuckle coming from behind me. Time froze and I gasped faintly. Slowly I turned to the direction that the chuckle came from and my jaw drop.

You: Umma....

My mother smiled at me and just when I was going to return the smile, she magically went through me.  My eyes widened and I looked faward, watching her walk towards my younger self. She caressed my cheek and I saw myself wake up. 

Mom: Have you been losing sleep? You even fell asleep on the grass...Do you know how much you weight? You have to start losing weight...

The younger me rubbed her eyes and nodded. 

My eyes began to sting. The woman that I haven't seen for years...was in front of me, scolding me.

Mom: Aish..see I told youYou go to sleep early..

I wiped my tears and and watched my mother smile brightly

I heard the front gates open and watched my younger self hop off the couch and run out the door. I followed myself out the door and froze once again. The man I once called father was standing in front of me. My younger self jumped on him and he received me with a big tight hug. I kissed his cheek and greeted him. 

you: Anneyong appa! how was work?

He smiled widely and walked towards inside the house. 

Appa: It was tiring but now that I see you I am all better now!

Both of me smiled and my brother came out the house.

Kyuhyun: Anneyong appa!

He ruffled my hair and I pouted. 

You: Oppa!

My father chuckled and my mother also came out of the house 

Umma: Yoboe!

She kissed my father's cheek and my father kissed her back on the lips. I smiled at the sight as tears exit there way out of my eyes. 

I knew that this was a dream. There was no way going back in time even though it's my greatest desire besides bringing my mother back to life. 

I wish this weren't a dream.

Or even if it was, I wish to never wake up.

But something told me to wake up. 

My eyes fluttered opened and I faced the now dark blue sky. The happiness that I used to have was gone. Taken away from me. My heart frowned and I clenched my fist. I wish I could go back to that time, because even though my mother was sick at that time I was still happy. Ever since I found out that my father had a secret affair I can't even look into my father's eyes without feeling hate towards him. A layer of water formed in my eyes and I tried my best not to cry. Its useless crying. I've cried everyday because of this memory. As hard as I try to forget everything, my efforts are thrown away when it suddenly comes back to me. I stood up, tears unexpectedly coming out. I felt irritated, how I couldn't be strong at times like this. I hate being weak. I hate hating my father. I only allowed myself to come back here for one only that reason. My brother and uncle. For more than half of my life I haven't seen them. Our mother had migraine-a powerful headache that occurs on one side of the head-and had to go to America so that our uncle could give her medication. She decided to bring me with her and I gladly accepted her desicion in bringing me. When we arrived to America, my father obviously didn't have to be as sneaky as he used to be to meet with his lover. A close friend of my mom found out and told my mother, knowing that do to her illness, it could kill her. Just as she thought, my mother died of shock and the powerful headche. The pain was too much for her to bear. I still remember finding her, laying dead on the kitchen floor. I also remeber hearing the conversation my uncle had with my father. My father sobbed as he confessed that he killed her and that this haunts him, which he deserves. No matter how many times he apologizes to me, I have no intensions for forgiving him.

Two reasons.

1. He didn't cheat on me, he cheated on mom.

2. He took away the person that can never be replaced. My mother.

I wiped the tears off my cheek and grabbed my guitar. I was heading inside the house until my uncle came out reading the newspaper.

 He stopped and looked at me.

 Uncle: Oh Daehyun. Keanchana? 

 He stared at my crying eyes. 

 I looked away and cleared my throat, hoping that my  voice wouldn't crack.

 You: Aniyo. I think ts the pollen thats irritating my eyes. 

 He looked at me suspiciously and sighed.

 Uncle: Don't lie. You at lying. You were thinking about noona weren't you?

 I  couldn't lie to him. He was aware of how I feel. I slowly noded and stared at    him. 

 He placed his hand on my shoulder and looked into my eyes. I could see   sadness in his eyes, feeling my pain since he also lost his older sister.

Uncle: Don't be afraid to cry or admit anything. If you need to cry, cry. Its better than having to hold everything inside you. 

He smiled sincerely and took his hand of my shoulder.

Uncle: By the way, I made dinner. You are getting too skinny so make sure to eat, arrasso?

I nodded and he walked towards the garden. He was right. Ever since my mother died, I haven't eaten as much as I used to. The thought of her pained me. I walked inside the house and headed towards my room. I was glad that my uncle allowed me to live with him. He kept my mother's house-which my father also used to live in after my father moved out-so that he could take care of the garden that my mother loved so much. My father lives miles away, which makes me feel a bit better. Of course it would be better if we didn't even like in the same country but I guess that isn't possible. I opened my door's room and shut it, placing my guitar in its place. I jumped on my bed and grabbed my laptop, placing the covers on me. I began to email my friends in America who've been curious how I've been.

From: Eun_Hae258

At 10:53 AM

How was the flight? Did you see Kyuhyun Oppa? 

*******

From: Vhenyse_Encarnation789

At 4:03 AM

Have you arrived yet? Did you see SHINee's van?? I miss you though :`(

*******

From: Stephen_559

At 7:09 AM

Hey Bunny! How are you? Did you arrive safe? Have you seen your brother? I miss you so much! email me as soon as you read this!

I smiled as read my three best friends email. I had more emails but I felt like only reading theirs. I replied back to them quickly.

From: Eun_Hae258

At 6:53 PM

How was the flight? Did you see Kyuhyun Oppa? 

From: Daehyun_bunny240

I miss you tooo! ^.^The flight was looooooooong but I caught up on my sleep! And ne, I saw Kyuhyun. I didn't recpgnize him though when I was at the airport. 

__________

From: Vhenyse_Encarnation789

Have you arrived yet? Did you see SHINee's van?? I miss you though :`(

From: Daehyun_bunny240

I arrived already. Actually I had an incident with the maknae. He isn't who you think it is, that jerk. Anywho I miss you too! I miss your kpop obssesion, which I usually get irritated. Email me every chance you get, arrasso?

__________

From: Stephen_559

Hey Bunny! How are you? Did you arrive safe? Have you seen your brother? I miss you so much! email me as soon as you read this!

From: Daehyun_bunny240

ne, I arrive safe. I saw my brother and he is handsome! Too bad he is my brother...kekeke. I miss you too! Send me all of your football games, arasso? 

I closed my laptop and laid on my bed. I smiled to myself as I thought of my friends. They are amazing people who will be extremely hard to forget about. I heard a knock on my door and I stood up.

You: Come in.

The door opened and my uncle came inside, turning on the lights as he held a tray with dinner.

Uncle: Didn't I tell you to eat? I brought you your dinner.

He placed it next to my bed and sat on my bed.

Uncle: Why do you keep the lights off?

You: I like the dark plus I am already used to it.

He nodded and took a look around my room.

Uncle: It didn't change much to you, did it?

You: Aniyo. I'm glad you didn't change anything. It would be hard for me to get used to a room that I wasn't familiar with.

He smiled.

I was suddenly curious about my uncles feelings. 

You: Uncle, do you miss umma?

His smile disappeared and he stared at the floor. I saw him slowly nod. 

Uncle: She was the only one that was always on my side. As nagging as she was, she was still the sister that I loved with all my heart. When that bast-I mean your father killed her, my heart broke. I miss her. A lot. i would do anything to bring her back alive but its impossible. 

He stared at me and I looked into his red eyes. I know how he feels. Losing someone who you love is the worst pain anyone could ever feel. He cleared hsi throat and stood up.

Uncle: Make sure you eat your food, arasso? If you need anything, I'll be in my office. 

He walked away, closing the door behind him and I suddenly felt empty again. I sighed and chewed on the food my uncle brought me. This moment, I wanted to cry again. Although its tiring, it never ends. At this rate my eyes will wear out. 

I thought about my new life that I will be starting in Korea. Tomorrow I will start school. I'll have to make new friends and am going to have to get used to this routine. I'll have to forget my life in America. I continued eating my food and drank a bit of my orange juice. Finally when I felt full, I sat on my bed, staring in space. 

My life has changed now, and it'll never be the same, sadly. It breaks my heart having this feeling of emptiness. I hope one day this all changes. I hope that I one day find someone who isn't cruel like my father but someone like my uncle or brother who can fill my heart and help me forget these times that I felt like this.

And I hope I find that Person soon...

SHINee POV 

After we arrived to our house, everyone sat on the couch. Taemin coughed and Key tsk.

"Aigoo. I don't know what was so important that you had to run in the rain like that. Hurry and change clothes you babo!" He nagged.

Taemin rolled his eyes and groaned as he walked upstairs to grab a new set of dry clothes and to wash. He was fustrated of what happened today. 

"Aish...I need to get Sulli of my mind. I keep seeing her evrywhere. I eaven thought that guy was her.." He mumbled to himself. He shrugged and continued to wash himself.

Minho was in his room, laying sown on his bed,  throwing a ball up and down as he pondered. He wasn't sure how he was going to tell Taemin the truth. 

Should I tell him....or should I not?

He's been asking himself this question ever since he and Sulli began to date. He knew what taemin felt for her since he shared his secret. Honestly, how can you not like a cute girl? Its almost impossible! All korean guys love girls that are tall, cute, girly and so on. That's basically the ideal type of girl. he sighd and sat up.

Taemin is going to kill him if he finds out that they have been going out. He's asked Sulli to keep it a secret form everyone, including F(X) members and SHINee members. Its been hard having to meet up in secret but not impossible. He laid down again and continued to throw the ball up in the air.

Jonghyun wored his reading glasses and read his favorite books. Its been a while since he's read so he must catch up on his reading. Onew often made fun of him and called him an ahjumma because he looks like an old lady with glasses.

Key wore his pink apron and began to cook the SHINee members a nice warm meal. Its been a while that they've eaten Key's cooking so they were all looking foward to eating it. He began to place the dinner and as expected, Onew was already sitting down waiting for him. 

"Agoo. Such a pig.." Key mumbled as Onew chuckled.

"Taemin! Minho! Jonghyun!"Food's ready!" He informed the other members. They imediatley rushed to the kitchen and sat.

"Gomawo Key!" They all said happily. He simply nodded and ate along with them. 

"Taemin remember ot drink medicne, arasso?" He reminded the maknae who was already close to finishing his meal.

"Neeeee." He responded.