Crap double update woooohooooo! Asianfanfic word document is STILL being a BUTTHOLE so I'm sorry if it looks like crap... Yes this chapter was a flash back from my other story, Kidnapped, but hey, it's supposed to be in this story lol so bear with me and just read XD

I knew what I was doing. I knew it was wrong to think that way and I knew I should be trying to get help, but I pushed those thoughts out of my mind. I was fed up and I wanted it to end. I knew they wouldn't stop no matter what I tried, so I was giving up, resolving our problem myself.

Everything that had been in my locker, covered in blood, was in the trashcan. My backpack, my textbooks, my notebooks, my gym shoes, everything, was gone. Not that I cared. I didn't need it anymore.

You would think I would feel at least the little bit afraid, a little scared of what I was going to do, but I wasn't scared at all. I knew what I was going to do. It took me barely any time to plan it all out.

My parents wouldn't notice. They usually didn't check on me. They never noticed me sneaking out, and if they did, they never said anything. They didn't care. So I knew they wouldn't check on me for at least a few days.

But... Key might catch me. He came over every night at 8PM and would stay with me, way after his curfew. He usually left around 12 or 1AM, so I would probably have to wait until then.

I would go to dinner, act perfectly fine and happy, and then go to my room and see Key reading manga, and pretend to be happy like always. But when he left, I would do it. I had my own bathroom and I had just bought a new set of razor blades a few days ago. They would work.

I walked home and opened the gate and then closed it behind me, locking it, just like always. I walked inside and announced I was home, just like always. My dad was reading the paper at the kitchen table and my mom was finishing dinner. Just like always.

"Help me set the table, please." She said, turning to smile at me. I nodded.

"Sure." We set the table, sat down, prayed and ate. My dad asked me about my day and I said it was fine. I didn't mention Mimi and Miki. I didn't give a single hint about anything I was going to do. I felt like I was doing great.

"You okay?" My mom asked, squeezing my shoulder. "You seem tense."

"Yeah, I'm fine. I'm just a little worried about the test I took today. It was kinda hard."

"I'm sure you did fine." My dad said, smiling a bit. He put the paper down. "You've been working hard this year. Your mom and I have been thinking about going on a little trip during summer vacation."

"R-Really?" I asked, my voice seemed to raise an octave.

"Yeah. We thought you might want to think about it though. I know you might want to spend your break with Key and hang out and be a teenager. We don't want you to study this summer, we want you to have fun. You've been doing so well, we thought you deserved a little gift." My mom said, grinning at me. "You decide, okay? There are only a few weeks left of this year, but try to decide soon okay?"

"Ah, O-okay..." I said, standing up. "I'm finished. Thank you for the food."

"Mhmm." She smiled.

I tried to walk slowly to the stairs and up them to my room, but I had a hard time controlling myself. They were going to... let me off for once? I hated studying so much but they made me, telling me they wanted the best for me and that I needed to get into a good college to make them proud. So I wanted to work hard for them, I wanted to be able to have a better life, like they told me I would if I studied. And I was finally getting a break? I couldn't help but smile a bit. I opened my bedroom door, and there was Key, laying on my bed, reading manga, like always. He flipped the page and looked up when he heard the door.

"Hey~" He said, grinning.

"Hey." I said, smiling back. "Where were you today?"

"Aish... I had a dentists appointment but mom never told me so I didn't get to tell you. Mianhae, I didn't want to miss school today..."

"We had that test in English, remember? That big one the teacher made us study nonstop for?"

"AHHH! THAT WAS TODAY?!" He flung the book behind him. It landed on the floor next to my bed. He grabbed his hair in his fists and shook his head. "I can't believe I forgot! And I missed it! CRAP!" He sighed and went limp on my bed, then suddenly flung himself forward, sitting up to look at me. "What was on the test? Was it hard?"

"IT WAS EXTREMELY HARD." I said, throwing myself on the bed next to him. My skirt came up a little in the back, but Key flipped it down, patting my . "I THINK I FAILED." I screamed into my pillow.

"Really? Oh my gosh it must have been REALLY hard. YOU NEVER FAIL ANYTHING."

"I KNOW." I yelled, slamming my head into my pillow again. "It ."

"I'm dooooomed." He moaned, throwing his face into the pillow too. He flung his leg over me and hugged my closely. "If I die, I will give you all of my music. Okay? All of my posters, everything. Everything I cherish."

"EVEN YOUR H.O.T. POSTER? THE ONE WHERE THEY'RE ALL WEARING WHITE AND TONY LOOKS-"

He cut me off. "Um, no, I want to be buried with that. No, wait, I want to be creamated, so I want them to burn it and mix it into my ashes."  We laughed. He let go and rolled over, grabbing the manga he had been reading off the floor, then rolled back over and onto me, squishing me.

"Yah, ow." I laughed, breathing heavily, pushing against him and trying to get him off of me. "Get off, you fatty."

"YAH! I'm not FAT! SEE THIS?! THIS IS PURE SKINNY. NO FAT AT ALL ON MY BODY." He jumped up and lifted up his shirt and smacked his stomach. It was flat and really white. I laughed.

"Stop flashing me you ert." I smacked his stomach before he let his shirt down.

"Jerk."

He grabbed my braids and swung them so that they hit me in my face. "You look so cute today." He grinned, smacking me again with my hair.

"Thanks." I mumbled, smiling slightly.

He jumped off the bed and sat in my desk chair, his knees up to his chin. He spun the chair around and started reading the manga again. Suddenly, I heard my mom call from the stairs.

"KEY! YOUR MOM CALLED! SHE NEEDS YOU HOME NOW!"

"ALRIGHT! THANKS UMMA~" He yelled back. 

"Hey, get out." I said, pushing him towards the window.

Now don't get all flustered. I'm not going to push him out the window so he'll fall to his death. This is how he gets in and out of my house. I swear he doesn't know what a door is.

"Do you mind if I borrow this manga?" He said, fanning himself with it. He stumbled to the window, I had pushed him a little harder. "All of the volumes? I know you have the rest. I raided your stash."

"I don't care." I said, sighing. "Just don't get in trouble with your mom. She'll probably yell at you for being here and not studying."

"Oh who cares. I'll just say we were having a study session."

"She won't believe you. She'll know you were messing around. She already knows you snuck out to get out of studying."

"What, like I do everyday? She needs to get used to it." He laughed, and pecked my cheek, opening the window and sitting on the edge. "I'll be back later when she falls asleep. Around 12PM probably."

I looked at the clock. It was 9PM now.

"Oh just go home. By the time you get here I'll be asleep too. And I need my sleep." I stuck my tongue out at him, then pushed him again, lightly. He made a face at me and grabbed onto the tree branch closest to my window, ready to swing down.

"Whatever. Fine. I'll see you tomorrow." He kissed my forehead and grinned, before throwing himself out the window. He swung from the branch and onto the ground, stumbling a bit. He sent me a thumbs up, then he shoved the manga in his coat pocket, walking away, his hips shaking a bit. I just laughed. He always made me feel better.

But the second he left, I felt the depression from earlier creeping in.

Mimi and Miki's words came flying into my head, killing any good mood I had been in. I was going to do it now. He wouldn't come back and my parents weren't going to come up any time soon. I walked into my bathroom, my heart beating so hard against my chest. I was nervous now. It would hurt. If I did it so that the cut was so deep, that I bled quickly, it wouldn't hurt as much. I opened up the pack or razor blades and picked one out. It was cold in my hand and I realized my hands were sweating. I whiped them on my skirt, then rolled my sleeve up.

I could see my vein, blue, close to the surface of my skin. It led all the way down my arm, where it disappeared at my elbow. It would be easy to cut this one.

My hands shaking, I lifted the razor, pressing it against my skin, lightly. I felt a little bit of pain and I gasped, lifting it away. It had only cut me a tiny bit, but I could see blood rising to the surface. I decided to cut vertically, knowing that it would end so much faster that way.

I could see my notebook, my desk, my locker in the back of my mind. All the hateful words. Fat, , idiot, good for nothing, just die already, it was all there. Tears pricked my eyes. I blinked them away. I wouldn't cry anymore over this. I was done.

So, I lifted the razor again, and pressed it against my skin, ready to slice my skin open and let all of my blood flow free. I heard the bathroom door creak, and my head snapped up to look in the open doorway now.

Key was standing there wide-eyed and pale, his mouth open slightly. I gasped and felt my hand jerk. I accidentally cut myself, not too deep, but it still hurt. Blood swelled to the surface and spilled over quickly. It was an ugly red, so red it looked almost black. It slid down my arm, down my hand and to the floor.

"Oh my G-" Key started, covering his mouth with his hand. "What are you doing?" His voice sounded so angry, I took a step back.

"N-Nothing, why are you here? I-I thought you-"

"DON'T TRY TO CHANGE THE SUBJECT!" He screamed, slamming the door shut behind him, he walked up to me and grabbed my hand, taking the blade, he threw it into the trash. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!"

"It's nothing!! I just-" I tried to cover it up with my hand, but he grabbed my arm to stop me.

"This isn't nothing. This is definitely NOT nothing! Why were you doing this to yourself?!"

His eyes searched mine wildly, and I couldn't take it anymore. I ripped my arm away, letting the blood drip down onto the floor, where a puddle was already forming.

"I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!" I yelled, stepping back. "I CAN'T TAKE IT!"

"Take what?!"

"THE HURT! YOU SEE HOW THEY TREAT ME!"

"WHO?!" He yelled back, his face was so pale, like he had seen a ghost. I remembered that he didn't like blood. His cheeks were flushed and there was a light sheen of sweat on his face, like he was ready to puke. I grabbed a towel and covered my arm with it, trying to help him.

"Who do you think? Mimi, Miki, EVERYONE ELSE IN OUR CLASS, AND THE SCHOOL. EVERYONE. They all pick on me and call me names and I can't take it!" I raked my hands through my hair, ripping it out of it's braids. "Do you know what they wrote in my locker today? DO YOU KNOW WHAT THEY DID TO ME TODAY?!" He shook his head. "BLOOD. THERE WAS BLOOD ALL OVER INSIDE MY LOCKER. AND GUESS WHAT THEY WROTE IN MY LOCKER? GUESS." He didn't say anything, so I said it for him. "JUST DIE ALREADY. THAT'S WHAT IT SAID. And it hurt, Key, it hurt so bad, and I gave up. I've been planning this all day, and you ruined it! I WANT TO DIE! NO ONE LOVES ME, EVERYONE HATES ME!! WHY WOULD I WANT TO LIVE IN A PLACE LIKE THAT?! I DON'T! SO I WANT IT TO END. I just want it to stop."

I started to cry. He stepped forward, hesitantly, and wrapped his arms around me, hugging me so tightly to himself.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry I wasn't there. I'm so sorry." He smoothed my hair back, whispering in my ear. I laid my head against his chest, sobbing into his shirt. The towel fell from my arm. I gripped his shirt in my hands, sobbing harder and harder. "I love you, okay? I love you so much! You're my best friend! I love you! And your mom and dad love you too, can't you see?"

I just sobbed into his shirt. "You're my only friend Key, no one else loves me. They all hate me. Even Zico! He hasn't talked to me in weeks! I don't know what to do anymore, Key! I can't stand the silence from him! I saw him in the hallway this morning, and guess what he did? HE PRETENDED NOT TO KNOW ME. HE DIDN'T EVEN LOOK AT ME WHEN MIMI AND MIKI WERE PULLING MY BACKPACK APART, FOR THE MILLIONTH TIME. I CAN'T TAKE IT KEY!"

"I'm sorry." He squeezed me harder. "I can't believe that idiot, that... I hate him. I HATE HIM. I don't know why he's acting like this, he's supposed to be your friend! He's supposed to be here for you!"

"It's my fault." I sniffled. "I told him I loved him, and he ran away. He doesn't like me. I scared one of my only friends away. I'm so stupid."

"No you aren't." He moved his head and looked me in the eyes. His eyes were full of tears too. "There's nothing wrong with loving someone."

"But why does it hurt so much? I can't stand it!" I cried, still staring into his eyes. His tears fell now. He wiped my tears away with his thumb.

"He doesn't deserve your love. Save it for someone who deserves it." He sighed, sniffling slightly. I used my hand to wipe away his tears, but blood smeared across his cheek.

"Oh, I'm so sorry,"

He shook his head and kissed my forehead. "It's okay. It's fine. It'll all be okay now. I promise. I'll protect you from these people. I promise. They won't hurt you anymore. I won't let them." He sighed again, and chuckled slightly. "I guess I'll introduce you to my friends now."

"Why didn't you before? Are you ashamed of them?"

I had asked him so many times about his friends, Onew, Minho, Taemin and Jonghyun, but he always told me they were too low class for someone like me.

"Yes. I'm ashamed of them."

We laughed. "Come on, let's clean up." He sighed, and bent down, using my bloody towel to wipe up the blood on the bathroom floor.

"What about your mom? Won't she be mad?"

"She can wait. You're more important than her." 

DID IT ? I HOPE NOT XD comment and subscirbe