Dear Diary,

 

Today is the day that I am going to start my life as a new person. At first, I still feel doubt with my decision but until when do that I need to hide myself. This is my life. I couldn’t keep living liked this. If there is someone who are really care about me and ask me “How do you feel?” I might answer her question by telling “I am fine.” although it was a completely a lie.

 

 

With a sigh, you closed your diary and throw your gaze outside the window. Today is mark 5 months you were hiding yourself. After what has happened to you in the past, you are no longer a same person that everyone is talking about. You put down your diary inside your drawer and locked it. This is your little secret and no one is allowed to know and read it. You walking to a large mirror and standing in front of it. Before this, your hair was dark but after what has happened, you deciding to change it. You cut it short and highlight it with another color. You tried to smiles but who are you trying to kidding with. Although with that smiles, you are still looks miserable.

                                                                                                                                     

You made your way to the kitchen and pour a glass of coffee. Out of nowhere, your younger brother appeared and snatched the glass away from you. “Thank you.” he said without looking at you. You pour another glass of coffee and hopped yourself on the counter. Your brother suddenly went back to the kitchen and his mouth wide open. “What happen to your hair? What have you done with it?” You rolled your eyes. Sometimes you brother could be over reacted. Although he is liked that, you are still love him since he is the only family you got.

 

“I cut it.”

 

“Why? I love your longer hair. Why you cut it?” he pouted. This is your hair that you were talking about but looks at your brother. He reacts like his hair was the one who is being cut. “Do you prefer me to hide myself in my room, Jiho?” He shook his head and at that time, his gazed soften. You know that looks and you hate it when someone looking at you liked that.

 

“Noona..How are you feeling?”

 

Worst. Bad. Died. What else you could say. That was all your feelings for the past 5 months without him. You hopped down from the counter and washed your glass. You do aware Jiho’s eyes following your movement. Fixing the strap of your bag, you went to ruffling his hair until it messy. “Let’s go. We don’t want to be late for our first day, right?”

 

“Not mine but yours.” he retorted.

 

Since the distance from your house and school is not far, you decide to walk over there although at first Jiho object the idea but after being force with you, he goes with you.

 

“So noona...Have you planned what are you going to eat at lunch?”

 

“Nah, I don’t. I will think about that later.” You winked. There are a lot of students arriving there. Jiho saw his friends and immediately running towards them. You smiled. It is good to see your little brother have friends, not liked you. As soon as you stepped your foot inside, all the eyes were on you. Some of them were looking at you with shock while some of them were looking at you with their hatred eyes. You took a deep breath and walk inside with confidently.

 

Along the walk, you could hear their bad comments about you. At first, you tried to ignore it but it become worst. Some of the comments really hurting you. Putting a poker face, you went to your usual seat. You put your legs on your desk while plugged an earphone in your ears. At least, this thing could block you from hear all the bad comments. “You are back.” A beautiful and petite girl sat in front of you. You ignore her. She sighed.

 

“Eun, stop pushing me. I am your best friends.”

 

You stopped the music and looking at her. “I never consider you as my friends and my best friends. Back off.” Even your voice is icy than a cold. You saw she flinched but you don’t give a damn about that at all. All of them are only want to show their pity to you. That is the last things you want from them. “You never think me as your best friends but I always think you as mine, Eun. If you have anything to tell, don’t hesitate to find me. I am willing to spend my time with you.” She touched your hand before looking at the front.

 

You place your hands on your laps while biting your lower lips. You can’t. This is not the time for you to cry. You can’t show your weak side to anyone. Not now and not never. The bell rang and students start to pill inside the class. You also notice the stares that they were giving to you. The rest of your day continues just like usual. Not even once you paid an attention to the lesson and you also caught so many times with your teacher but who cares. It is a lunch time. You made a mental note to meet with your little brother. Out of nowhere, she clings on your wrist and looking at you with her puppy eyes. You tried to shake her hands away from you but it’s useless. “What do you want?!”

 

“As your best friends, it is my priority to spend my lunch time with you. Come on. I am really hungry and you don’t want me to die in a starvation right?”

 

“Like hell I care about that.”

 

“Eun, language. You couldn’t say a bad word with your beautiful mouth. “

 

You rolled your eyes. Seeing her, reminds you with Jiho. She and Jiho could be a best friend. Without caring your protest, she pulled you with her to the cafeteria. Students stop from eating and looking at you with the corner of their eyes. Man, this is . “What are you guys looking at?! Stop staring at her, you !”

 

That’s really caught your attention. She was standing up for you. After all the bad things you done to her, she still treat you like a human being. This girl is really weird. I don’t even know her name. “Why don’t you find a seat first while I buy the food?”

 

Whatever. You spotted Jiho not far away and made a way to his table. His friends squirmed with uncomfortable. “Hey noona. I saw you made a new friend. She is beautiful.” You blinked your eyes before rolling it playfully. “You are developing a crush with her?” Jiho sputtered the food.

 

“Eww. Just eww, Jiho. You are disgusting me.”

 

“Stop saying something that bull.”

 

“What? I just stated the fact.” His friends are looking at the two of you both. “What? Stop looking at us and eat, skunk.” From the corner of your eyes, you saw Jiho shaking his head, not liked with your attitudes towards his friends. The only one that you are going to treat kindly is your brother.

 

“Are we going to seat at here? “ That annoying girl who you describe with yourself just now asking you with a tray of food. You look at the amount of food. “Are you a cow? Look at the amount of food.” You said with disbelief.

 

“What? I am not the only one who is going to eat it. You are going to eat it too, with me.” You snatched fries from Jiho’s plate and munched it. “As you can see, I am eating with my brother, so get lost.”

 

If you describe yourself as a stubborn girl, then she is twice than you. She never takes “NO” as an answer. With her poker face, she took a seat in front of Jiho. She shoots a smile to Jiho’s friends and all of them blushed. “Kids nowadays.”

 

“Noona, that’s my fries. Go eat with her. “

 

You faked a gasped. “You’re hurting me, Jiho. How dare you?!” Jiho pushing your head playfully and thanks god that he is your brother, if not, you already kick his ball. “You guys look cute together.” Annoying bee comment while put a plate of fries in front of you. You scoffed. “Noona..Behave.”

 

“See..Who are you to her, boy?”

 

Jiho look at you and her back and forth. Is this girl is really dumb or what? Didn’t she hear Jiho called me noona? “Not your business, annoying bee. Shut up and eat. After that, get lost from here.” You said it with your mean tone. She pouted and ate her fries silently.

 

“I am really sorry on behalf on my sister. She just..You knows girl problem.” You hit his head with a plate. “If you are talking about PMS, not I am not, Jiho. I just hate these people!” With those words, everyone stop from doing whatever they did and looking at you. The noisy cafeteria suddenly changed to silent just with a word coming from you.

 

“Eun..”

 

“You shut up! I am not talking to you and you..Don’t ever talk to me again.”

 

“I don’t get it. Why are you so mean to her? Where is the old Eunji? I hate this side of you, noona.”

 

You froze. The old Eunji. The old side of you. With an emotionless face and cold gaze, you answered your brother question. He was taken aback with your expression. “The old Eunji is death. She does no longer exist in this world.” You spat. “Eunji-ah.”

 

You stormed out from the cafeteria, ignoring all the stares you received. You wiped your tears that are threatened to going out. “I will never cry. I won’t. “ You are too busying with your emotions until you didn’t notice the guy in front of you. Both of you collided and you fall on top of him. Your eyes widening in surprised, same with the guy too. At first he looks really startled but suddenly, he is smiling to you, showing his dimple. “I found you.” 

 

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I made it..This is only just  a beginning and I really hope you guys are going to like it..

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