Key

Let's just state that for a fact, k?

The name is Kim KEY.

Therefor, i unlock the key to your heart, peasant.

 

Now, i'm not trying to be rude or mean, but it's just the way it is. So you bes be checkin yo'self before you wreck yo'self, you heard me?

 

Now, let me explain my life.

 

I was born in a nice hospital in seoul. I can never remember the name of it. But anyway, i was wrapped in a nice pink frilly blanket after i was welcomed into this world. They took me to this nice warm room where i could sleep. Cuz girl, my dark circles when i was a baby- oh, don't even get me started.

 

My mom decided to name me Kim Kibum, like, after my father, Kim Kibum the first. She said that even when i was a baby, i looked like him.

 

That was a horrible insult.

 

Like, really? Who has ever compared me to my father? He couldn't even swaddle me in my blanket or put eyeliner on me right!

 

Ok, Key, breathe, BREATHEEEE~

 

K, i'm back.

 

So anyway. You are probably thinking.

"Key, the prince of the whole universe, why are you making me sit through your amazing life story?" Well, i haven't gotten to the good part yet.

 

When i was a little kiddie, i was very interested in makeup and glitter. But not dirt. I am not Ke$ha, lemme put that out there. I would always dress up in my moms skirts and borrow her lip gloss... Ah, those where the good old days.

 

Then i realized, hey, i'm not a boy like all of the others in my kindergarden class. I would always stick with the girls and play dolls. I didn't like to play catch with appa, or wrestle. I was the gentle type. And it didn't help that my father wanted me to be a man.

 

"Come on, kibum! You will love it. Football is a man's sport!" He told me. I rolled my eyes.

 

"Yeah. But i don't like football." I said to him.

 

"But you don't even know! Have you watched it?"

"No."

"Seen pictures of it?"

"Nope."

"Listened to it on the radio?"

"They have it on the radio?" I asked in amazement. He slumped over.

 

"Let me tell you something. I think i haven't raised you well, and i want to see you do something i have always wanted to do." He sighed. My eyes brightened and looked to him.

 

"Shopping?!" I asked, excitedly. He frowned.

 

"No, Kibum. I wanted to play football when i was your age. But i never really had the courage to try out." He looked down. I put a hand on his shoulder and gave him a sympathetic smile.

 

"It's ok. I mean. You can go out for one of those old man volunteer teams, right?" I grinned. He pushed my hand off his shoulder and opened the car door.

 

"Kibum, you are trying out, now. Whether you make it or not, just at least try. Please?" He pleaded as we walked into my high school and into the gym where the tryouts were being held.

 

I nodded and tried to smile.

 

I guess i'm gonna have to epic fail.

 

 

"Ok, ladies! Welcome to seoul high school football tryouts. I will start this test with heart and strength endurance. Now. Run in place, you little dogs!" The coach spat at us. I looked over to the side of me to see appa. He was smiling.

 

I hate to do this, but his fabulous son had to.

 

I decided to run really slow. Make it seem like i was weak.

 

The coach walked over to me and glared daggers into my soul.

 

"I told you to run, not prance, pretty boy! Put your effort into it!" He yelled. I flinched and because i was scared of him, decided to go with his words. I ran really fast in place for the remainder of the test.

 

"Ok, now we will do pushups and sit ups! Down on the ground, now!" Coach commanded. I fell on the ground into a plank position and feared for my precious life. I have never done so much work in my life! Diva key never does work.

 

"1...2...3...4...

24...25...26...27...

59...60...61...62..."

 

We ended up doing 100 pushups consecutively. OH MY GAHD! Dad, you better buy me "juicy couture" for a year. My hands hurt and my lungs hurt, like, oh my- i couldn't even.

 

"10 minute break!" He said and once he said those 3 words, i fell back onto the floor, clawing for my bag by me, i took out a bag of grapes and mineral water. Gosh, my whole body hurt like nobodies business.

 

Ok, time for plan B.

 

"Ah! Coach come quick!" I pretended my stomach hurt and started to roll around the (dirty) floor in pain. Coach ran to me.

 

"What is it?" He crouched down and looked at me.

 

"Ah, coach! My torso hurts. I think i broke my... Sarcophagus." I groaned. He rolled his eyes.

 

"Sarcophagus, eh? Well, if you were a mummy, i would be worried. Now, get back up!" He got up and walked off. I sat up.

 

"But that works! That always works! I didn't think he would be that smart!" I pouted and plopped a grape in my mouth. Appa came over and sat down on the ground with me.

 

"So, hows it going?" He asked me with a smile.

"Fine." I lied through my teeth. What was i saying? It was going horrible!

"Well, i'm happy for you. Keep up the good work!" He smiled and patted my sweaty back.

 

Oh god. Key diva does not like this...

 

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Sorry for the crappy first chapter. But i sort of wanted to make it this way so it can involve into better story later. So how do you like it? Key seems a bit... Um, self loving, doesn't he? Hahaha

 

So yeah! I hope you like the story.

 

(UPDATE:

the poster was actually uploaded through my phone, so for all of you guys who are mobile updaters, THERE IS HOPE! Haha

I used wordpress and clicked on the media section. I uploaded the pic from my iPhone's picture library onto there, and then copied and pasted the url into AFF! Easy!

Ok, maybe not. Lol)

 

I will go to bed now. It is 3:30 in the morning and i need sleep. ^^

 

BYEEEEE~