5zic – Kim Han Gil
Kang Nam – Namekawa Yasuo
Cream – Sim Gi Seok
Sims – Kim Jong Su

His hand slowly slipped into mine and quietly he whispered, “You’ll always be with me in my heart, May. I love you, I love you. I’ll be okay you can fly towards the heavens now.” I could feel the tears threatening to fall, but it would not fall, it could not fall. The clocked ticked and the machine continued to beep. Approximately two minutes passed and my heart rate started to decline. Exhaustion took over and my eyes began to close shut, someone yelled and I felt someone shaking my arm. I tried to open my mouth to say that I’d take only a small nap, but my muscles did not allow me to open my mouth. Finally, everything went silent and I could not hear or feel the shouts or screams. My body felt free. The pain that was once in my chest and legs, the soreness of my head, was replaced with comfort. I felt like I was soaring, soaring towards the sky. I opened my eyes and to my surprise I was in the skies, almost reaching the puffy white clouds that were moving with the winds ever so slowly. A smiled played on my lips and I could feel the warmth of the angels, their hand reaching towards me, ready to welcome me.  Just when my hands were about to touch theirs, I heard a heartbreaking cry. I paused right in front of the angels and turned my head and looked back down to Earth. There he was, the love of my life, sitting in the chair besides my bed, his hands clasping on mine. Tears falling unrelentingly down his beautiful face. I felt myself being pulled towards him. I turned to look at the angels I could see their hands pulling back, as though they knew that it was not my time just yet to go into their arms. Turning back I flew back to him, flew back to be with him.

I stood in the corner of the room as they placed the covers over my face, he was now being held back by Jong Su. Trashing, his tears fell down his beautiful eyes, “NO! You can’t take her! May! May!” He yelled my name countless of times, finally when they pushed my bed out of the room, he fell to his knees, “May… May…”

“I’m sorry hyung,” Jong Su said. Han Gil shook his head holding his face in his hands. Jong Su let him go as he slowly stumbled away from the room.

“Someone has to go with him,” Yasuo said as he looked at the younger boy, “I think he might do something stupid.”

“I’ll go,” Gi Seok said as he followed after the leader.

I followed behind Gi Seok, his shoulders were sagging and he was dragging his feet. He was quite far ahead of me, his strides long as he tried to keep up with Han Gil. I quickened my pace and walked beside Gi Seok, turning to look at him I couldn’t help but notice anguish on his face. I’ve always had a soft spot for Gi Seok. He was like an older brother that I never had. He understood me, he knew me and he helped me through the most painful things in life. He had a hard exterior but he was the sweetest guy I’ve ever met. I frowned as I could see tears threatening to fall down his eyes. I’ve never seen him cry before and it made me hurt to know that I was the one causing so much pain, I wanted to reach out to him I wanted to tell him that he had to stay strong not only for me, but for Han Gil. When we stopped, I turned away from him and stared at the surroundings. We were outside.

“Hyung, where are you going?” Gi Seok asked as he stared at Han Gil’s back.

“I can’t stay in there,” Han Gil’s raspy voice spoke, “I feel like I am suffocating.” Han Gil turned around and I looked at his face, his eyes were red. Gi Seok walked towards the older male and silently stood by him. I watched the two staring up into the cloudless sky.

“Why did it have to be her?” Han Gil asked as he choked up, “Why wasn’t it me?”

“How do you think she’s going to feel, to know that you are saying this? Do you think it will get better by saying all these things?”

Han Gil raised his voice, “She died because of me! I was the one who killed her!”

Gi Seok got angry and grabbed Han Gil’s collar, I wanted to stop them but all I could was stand and stare. “If you think that you’re going to feel better and that the past is going to change because you wished that it was you that died, then you’re dead wrong. Nothing’s going to change! All you can do is look forward, you can’t do anything. We can’t change the past! It was an accident, you have to realize that!” There was silence Han Gil knew that he was right. It was an accident, who knew that there was going to be a drunk driver crossing paths with them? Who knew that on that night, it was going to be the last time that they’d be together.

“I love her, I wanted to marry her,” Han Gil whispered. I felt my lips quiver as listened to what he was telling Gi Seok, “You wanted to marry me?” They couldn’t hear me but I continued to ask, “You wanted to marry me?”

“She was the one. Gi Seok, tell me how am I supposed to live when my other half is gone?”

Gi Seok let him go, “Music. Live for music. She loved it when you would make music for her.”

He was right, yet again. Whenever he’d come running to me with a smile on his face, it was usually because he successfully finished writing another rap or song. I smiled, “Right that is what you have to live for. Then when you find another girl, you’ll forget me…and be happy again.” The thought of him forgetting me hurt, but I knew it would happen eventually. He was not going to only love me in his lifetime, he was young. Love was bound to come again. I stared at Han Gil but I knew nothing was getting into his head. I walked up to the both of them, standing where Gi Seok was, I faced him. Placing my ghostly hands on his face, I felt him shiver, were my touches cold? I withdrew my hands and continued to stare at him, “You’ll be fine,” I whispered. It was as though he could hear me, turning his head to the sound of the wind, he looked directly through me to Gi Seok “Did you hear that?” Gi Seok looked at him curiously and shook his head, “It sounded like May.”

“I didn’t hear anything. I think you’re just exhausted that you’re hearing things. May’s not here. She’s gone.”

“No, I swear I heard her voice.”

“Then tell me what she said,” Gi Seok said skeptically, but going along with whatever the older man was saying.

“She said that I’ll be fine, but how the hell would she know that. She’s not in my shoes.”

 “Eventually you’ll be able to let me go,” I continued, “Don’t be too sad. We’ll meet again. Live on and make the music that I love... become the artist that you dreamed to be since you were young. You have so many things left to do and accomplish. Don’t let my death end your world. I’ll cheer you on like how I always used to do. I’ll always be here for you. I’ll pray for you. I’ll always love you.”

Han Gil started to tear as he heard the faint whispers, “Please. I need you. I want to meet with you. Come back.”

Gi Seok watched as the older man fall to his knees and looking up towards the sky.

I bent down and touched his face out of instinct. He flinched by the coldness of my touch, he looked straight, as though he could see me. I smiled, “Don’t be a baby now, you’re a grown man.”Gi Seok looked down at him and bend down to his level, “Hyung, let’s go back in.”

Han Gil flung his arms and pushed Gi Seok away, “She’s here! Leave me here with her! Go away!”

“Listen to what he has to say… you know that he cares for you.”

“I want you to be with me. I love you, please come back. I only need you,” he pleaded.

Gi Seok looked at him pained, without uttering one more word he got up and left. I watched as he walked towards the entrance of the hospital, “You shouldn’t have done that, you’re pushing people away, you need them.”

“I only need you.”

“I’ve been only gone for a little bit, you can’t be like this.” Han Gil reached towards me and right through me, he knew I was there, but he could not see me. “If you love me, you need to let me go. You need to move on you need to live for me, for yourself. You can’t be like this forever.” He didn’t listen as he continued to grasp the air. I was getting frustrated “You told me that you’ll be okay, that you’ll be fine without me... You said that I can go…”

”I thought I could live without you, but when you left, I felt nothing. I felt like I was dying. I was lying. I need you.”

I smiled. The thought of how much he needed me made me remember the times he’d hold me and tell me I was his world. “You have to listen to me.. I can never come back. You have to move on and live for me.” Han Gil didn’t say anything it was true he knew that I would not come back… I could never come back. I was dead. “Just pretend that I’m on a vacation and that you’ll see me soon. We will meet again in the near future, before then live on and be happy.” He started to sob and my heart broke, “I love you.”

“I love you too.. We will meet again…” he managed to say between the tears. I leaned in and gave him a kiss on the cheek, when I moved back he was touching the side of his face that I had kissed. I looked up towards the sky and again I could see the hands reaching down for me. I slowly got up and closed my eyes, the feeling of freedom finally returned and when I opened my eyes, I was in the angel’s arms. I stared at the angel as she smiled at me, then looking down passed me. I turned to look down as well. Han Gil was getting up, wiping his eyes roughly. The others were exiting the hospital and quickly surrounded him. After some exchanges of words, they all gave him a brotherly hug. I turned back to the angel who now stared at me intently, ever so slowly a smile spread on her lips and she pulled me to the gates of Heaven, where I would wait for him. 

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A/N - the first chapter of my collection, i hope i started off with a good one. comments are apperciated... ok, bye. :)