Jongdae  walked absent-mindedly into the school, not even bothering to greet back when someone greeted him like saying ‘hi’, ‘wassup’, ‘hey Jongdae’ or others to him. There was just too much things for him to think about. Too much problems for him to handle, or that was what he thought. He just looked like a walking-zombie on that day.

    His classmates were left in puzzlement, as he was usually the one who always had the calm aura around him, and to see him in such depressing mode did bothered them a bit. Some whispering could be heard from the students, as they were urging each other to ask the depressed person what had happened, yet no one really had the guts, as one moody Kim Jongdae  is a scary Kim Jongdae.

    It was not until the end of the tiring day that one of his closest group of friends, Jongin asked  him why on earth did he had the kind of the expression that Kris usually have on a beautiful day like that.

    “What do you mean by the expression that I usually have, Kim Jongin? “ Kris hissed, slapping his hand on the younger’s back.

    “Ouch, why are you hurting my fragile body? Ahah, are you jealous because I can dance better than you, hyung? Tsk,tsk,I can sue you on this, you know that hyung!! “ Jongin said, sticking his tongue and trying to make the older angrier.

    “You brat, don’t even test my patience, or I swear you’ll regret it once I lay both of my hands on that pretty face of yours”

    “Uh-oh, you had just admit that I have a pretty face. I would like it better if you said handsome, but pretty is fine too for now “ tapping his chin, the younger one said, smirking.

    “Oh you’ll really get it”

     Kris started to ran after Jongin who was already a few metres ahead from him, before being stopped by Suho.

    “Are you really going to be as immature as Jongin now, Kris? “ Suho asked, raising his brows.

    “Urghh”

     After for about ten more minutes, Jongin came back, headphones on both his ears, walking casually to them. He knew that Kris would not really able to do anything to him, as the guardian of the group would usually be there to calm things out.

    “Alright, now that everyone had settled down again, back to the topic. Why do you look like someone had just killed your little puppy today, Jongdae?” Suho asked, all eleven pairs of eyes now basically were just starring at the said person, who was sitting between Tao and Jongin.

    “I don’t even have a puppy,hyung” he muttered.

    “Oh, I thought you had one. Then  who did Natsu belongs to? “ the older asked, suddenly confused.

   “It was mine, hyung” Chanyeol piped up.

   “And you said that I was the forgetful one, Grandpa” Lay muttered, emphasizing on the word ‘Grandpa’.

   “Yah, I’m not even that old”

   “ Yeah right. Hadn’t you even realize that you had even already got white hairs. “ Baekhyun said, pointing to the older’s head.

   “Eh really? Give me your compact-mirror Baekhyun”

   “I don’t have one”

   “Yeah right, like anyone would trust that” Sehun  snorted.

   “Oh Sehun…” Baekhyun turned to face him and glared, Sehun just simply shrugged it off and drinks his bubble tea quietly, enjoying the evening breeze.

   “ Calm down, hyung. It was just a joke…….that is true though” Kyungsoo patted Baekhyun’s shoulder.

    Jongdae chuckled slightly at the childish behaviour  that were shown by his friends, making they shifted their attention back to him.

    “And you, Jongdae, still hadn’t answer our question” Baekhyun huffed, crossing his arms.

    Jongdae bit his lip, not knowing what he should answered.

   “It’s nothing guys, I was just tired with all the assignments and stuff” he then said.

   “Yeah right. You, Kim Jongdae, tired because of assignments. If it was the others, like Luhan hyung, or Tao, it would made sense, but for you, nope,no.”

    The others nodded except for Luhan and Tao who said that Kris was being mean at them.

   Jongdae sighed deeply, he did not really wanted for the others to worry about him. He was after all an already grown-up teenager now.

   “Alright, fine. It wasn’t really about that. It’s just that I feel like everything is too hectic nowadays.  My family, studies, social life, not that I really have one though. And to be honest, I could not even think properly these days. There were some things that kept interrupting my mind.  Unnecessary things even maybe. And these days, it seems that I couldn’t trust people like I use too anymore, even you guys sometimes. It suffocates me, how I could not even trust my bestfriends .

    Sometimes I even hope that I were not even born in this world. It wasn’t the best feeling, when you felt like maybe everybody else hates you, maybe they were talking bad behind your back, and maybe if you get too close with someone, they’ll eventually hurt you, and the other infinite possibilities. I knew that it was stupid of me to let this negative side takes over my mind, but I couldn’t help it. What if all of these are true? What if the others were hoping the same thing as me,that I shouldn't even exist in this world …….”

    Jongdae trailed off as his tears fell, he felt ashamed at how he could thought so negatively,of others and himself. He kept looking down at his shoes, not daring to see his friends’ faces. He knew that they would never thought that those things would ever troubled his mind,as he was always the more collected one among them,other than Suho that is.

    The members were left in silence, trying to accept what he had just told them,about what he felt. They were also blaming themselves, that not even one of the other eleven of them had noticed this. Jongdae was always so composed and the happy-go-lucky type that they would never thought he would ever thought of himself like that.

    Suho was thinking about what he should said to convince the younger that nobody really thought of him like that. Jongdae was too nice of a person for anyone to think of him like that. He turned to see what the others wanted to say about this.

    They all gave him pleading looks, hoping that he could reassure Jongdae. He knew that they were all worried about the latter, after all they had knew each other for a long time, some even since elementary school. He sighed before turning his head to look at Jongdae.

     “Jongdae- ah” he said softly.

     Jongdae tensed a bit hearing his name been called out, yet he still kept his eyes on the ground. It was not until Suho squat down in front of him and hold his hand in both of his that he finally looked up from the ground, seeing the concern look on the older’s face. He looked around towards his friends, and he noticed the same expressions on their faces too. He felt guilty again, the persons that were playing around just a few minutes ago were being unhappy just  because of his silly problems.  He swallowed the lump that started to form in his throat.

     “Jongdae, look at me” Suho whispered.

    Jongdae shifted his eyes back to the person in front of him. He watched silently as the person started to talk again.

    “ Hear what I’m gonna say carefully, Jongdae.” he paused. When Jongdae nodded his head quietly, he continued what he was going to say.

    “Jongdae-ah, you’re one of our closest friend, and to know that you had suffered silently alone hurt us too. We’re always here for you no matter if you’re gonna be happy and laughed like a crazy monkey….ok, that wasn’t really necessary, but yeah, or need a shoulder to lean on. We’ll always be there for you. If you felt like you couldn’t trust us fully like how you used too, we’ll gain it back. If you felt like there were others who hate you, it’s alright, we’ll always like you for who you are because you’re our precious friend. Although I doubt there are people in their right mind who would even hate you.

    And I really feel like slapping you right now because of even thinking that you should not even exist in this world. A great person like you deserve to exist, more than someone who just spend their life without an ambition. You had done good things in your life, helping people around when the others have problem, that sometimes brought yourself into trouble. We’re grateful that you chose to befriend us, without you, the other eleven wouldn’t be complete. So don’t ever lose your hope again, coz we’ll always be there to help you. After all, that’s what friends are for, right guys? “ Suho smiled, ending his words.

   “Yeah!”

   “You heard that Jongdae”

   “Good one, Grandpa”

   “You can always lean on us”

   “We love you hyung”

    Jongdae let his tears fell again seeing his friends all concerned about him. He chuckled silently at how childish yet how mature they could all be at times. He wiped away his tears and took a breath to relax himself.

    “Thank you” he finally said.

    Those simple words, yet so many meaning behind them. They nodded their head before lunged their body towards Jongdae, capturing in a group hug. He laughed at how Suho who was in the middle of the hug with him kept struggling and shouting that he could not get enough air.

    ‘Thank you guys’ Jongdae thought silently.

    ‘Even if I’ll meet more problems in the future, I’ll not give up, coz I know that I have you guys, my bestfriends, my brothers, my precious’

 A/N i don't even know what crap did I just wrote. Mistakes =i'm sorry ;_;

       if anyone even read this, comment please. It would make my day :)

      till then,goodbye~