"There is love in our bodies and it holds us together
But pulls us apart when we're holding each other
We all want something to hold in the night
We don't care if it hurts or if we're holding too tight

There is love in your body but you can't get it out
It gets stuck in your head, won't come out of your mouth
Sticks to your tongue and shows on your face
That the sweetest of words have the bitterest taste"

                                             (The Hardest of Hearts by Florence and the Machine)

When Eunhyuk finally made it to the kitchen all the other members were already there. They lived on two different floors but everyone liked to eat together and to be completely honest: they were all lazy and liked to eat the food Ryeowook made for them. Donghae was sitting between Siwon and Sungmin and he looked dreadful with big, red, puffy eyes. Eunhyuk wondered if Donghae had cried as much as he himself had done that morning. He slide down on the empty chair between Leetuk and Shindong and mumbled a quiet ”good morning.” as he reached for the cereals. He tried to keep his head down, not wanting everyone to see his puffy eyes and be forced to answer their concerned questions. The silence that slowly crept into the room as the members noticed his current state didn’t go unnoticed by him no matter how hard he even tried to ignore it while he was intently staring down in his bowl with cereals. When he reached for the milk however he couldn’t help but glance at Donghae who was only pecking in his cereals, spaced out but as on a cue Donghae suddenly lifted his gaze too and their eyes met for a split second before they both quickly averted their eyes to stare down in their cereals again. Eunhyuk could feel the stares from the rest of the members as they continued to eat their breakfast in silence. 

”Are you and Donghae fighting again?” Sungmin asked at last, tired of the awkward silence. 

Eunhyuk froze with his spoon halfway to his mouth and gazed up at Donghae again that this time continued to stare down in his cereals, pretending to not have heard the question or too spaced out to actually hear it, you could never be certain with Donghae. 

”What? What do you mean? No, we’re not fighting?” Eunhyuk answered him a little surprised, their talk hadn’t been a merry one but why would they be mad at each other? They had just spoken about their unhappy love lives, which of course were miserable for completely different reasons. 

”Come on Hyukjae... Both you and Donghae are looking horrible, like you’ve been crying your eyes out...” Shindong chimed in as he gulped down an egg. 

”Well... That’s for an another reason! We’re not fighting, really!” Eunhyuk protested and took a big gulp of strawberry milk.

”Yeah... Sure...” scattered mumbles said around the table disbelievingly.

”You two really are like a real couple... All these stupid fights over nothing, you’re both like strangely possessive over the other too and so jealous...” Sungmin said as he pointed his spoon back and forth between them.

”Yeah... Maybe our fans aren’t so crazy when they think you two are a real couple?” Eunhae?” Shindong joked in an attempt to brighten the atmosphere. 

”They do have enough couple fights for it to be real.” Kyuhyun said and smirked. 

”Yeah and they even cry when they fight...” Sungmin chirped in.

”Haha, is there anything you’ve forgotten to tell us, hyungs?” Kyuhyun asked in a feign innocent voice, the evil light in his eyes showing that he enjoyed this moment to tease his hyungs a little too much.

”Yeah... Are you hiding something for us?” Ryewook joined the conversation in a playful voice.

Eunhyuk felt as if the world had begun to spin and felt at lost for words at first but then something snapped inside him and he showed his spoon into his cereals a little harder than necessary.

”Cut it! Stop to always make us a couple! It makes me feel sick! Who would want us to be together? We’re friends and were not even fighting!” he said, a little too loud.

The room fell quiet and no one spoke for a few minutes until Leetuk broke the silence.

”Hyukjae! Why are you acting like this? You never get upset? You know that the members only were teasing you and trying to brighten up the mode. Trying to help you get over whatever stupid thing you’re fighting over this time!” Leetuk said in his leader voice.

”I’m sorry, I overreacted, I know you didn’t mean it but I’m just so... tired of it... And we’re really not even fighting this time, I promise!” Eunhyuk said and looked at all the members except for Donghae, with an apologetic look. He couldn’t look at Donghae, it would break his heart. He had just said that he didn’t like Donghae in a romantic way, which perhaps was how it was supposed to be but it wasn’t the reality, and he didn’t want to see Donghae’s indifferent face.

”Hm... Yet neither of you can look the other in the eyes... Donghae? Are you really not fighting this time?” Leetuk said with his worried parental voice. All the members suddenly turned their attention to Donghae who had been unusually quiet during the whole conversation.

”No... We’re not...” a weak, muffled voice whispered as Donghae continued to look down in his cereals, sitting slightly bent over the bowl to hide his face.

”Really?” Leetuk asked him in a disbelieving voice.

”Yes...” Donghae whispered but then the first quiet splash in Donghae’s milk was heard and Eunhyuk watched the ripple as if it moved in slow motion. Then another tear fell and a few seconds later one more. It seemed as everyone in the room except for Donghae had stopped breathing and only hulking sounds from him could be heard. Eunhyuk didn’t know what to do and was about to reach over the table to put his hand on Donghae’s shoulder when Donghae  suddenly rose up and said that he needed to use the bathroom before quickly walking away. The quiet room stayed silent when he had left and head after head slowly turned to stare at Eunhyuk accusingly. 

”What?” He asked and played with his fingers nervously.

”I don’t know what you’ve done this time but you better go after him and fix it right now. Do you hear me, Hyukjae?” Leetuk said with a voice that didn’t do much to hide his anger.

”But we’re really not fighting this time, if you only would listen to my expl...” he tried but Leetuk cut him off with the voice of a person that was about to go mad out of anger.

”Lee Hyukjae. You will go after him and fix this immediately. Now!”

Eunhyuk slowly rose from his seat and walked out from the kitchen with his head hanging low, feeling how s upset stares bore their way into his back. He didn’t understand why Donghae was acting like this. Was it because of the girl he liked or had Eunhyuk said something stupid last night? He couldn’t think of anything he had said or done, except for speaking about love with Donghae and it was Donghae who had brought up the subject. If he was so sensitive about it he shouldn’t have brought it up from the beginning! 

Eunhyuk really didn’t feel like speaking to Donhae right now, he wasn’t sure if he would be able to listen to Donghae cry over some girl. It would shatter his heart into a million small pieces and probably make him cry too. His friend needed him however and no matter how much a loved Donghae he must put their friendship first, even if it meant sacrificing himself. He just wished he wouldn’t need to do it. He stopped outside their little bathroom that only had a shower, a toilet and a sink, it definitely wasn’t made for a big band. He thought about their shower competitions: who could shower the quickest, and all their good memories and he smiled at how they always managed to turn the negative things into positives ones. He would pull this off, he would be there as a good friend for Donghae. He took a deep breath before he knocked on the door and gently whispered Donghae’s name. It was awfully quiet for a moment until the sound of the lock being turned open finally was heard. 

//

Finally had the time to write a new chapter, hope you like it!:)

I think I will start every chapter with a short poem or quote from a song from here on, btw.

And if anyone has any requests for this story, or another one, please leave a comment!:) 

Please comment and subsribe to the story if you like it!:)