Apart of Hyung Jun who was still eating my breakfast it took around five minutes for each of them to recover from the shock. First one was my best friend who hugged me fast as worrying it may be just  joke.

-          I knew it – she whispered.

-          And I know your little dirty secret – I answered.

-          What secret? – she pretended to be confused.

I didn’t answered just looked at Junnie who was finishing my coffee. Jung Min in mean time tried to pushed everyone behind the door. It seemed like they had been glued to the floor. Their eyes big and mouth fully open. I giggled. It seemed to woken them up as they all move in one second and crashed me on the bed hugging me. They landed on So Yun. Hyung Jun managed to grab the table before they landed on me. If he wouldn’t do it, there would be a lot of cleaning to do.

-          Congratulations  - each of them patted Jung Min’s back.

He was happy but embarrassed too.

-          Yah guys, that’s enough. I need shower – I threw pillow – Get out.

They have been forced by Jung Min to leave the room. So Yun walked out behind them looking at me from time to time. I think she was worried I will spill the bins. I smiled then run to the bathroom and get myself to appealing state. We ate breakfast together then decided to spend next two days doing crazy things. It wasn’t till next day when leader found out that DBSK staying in Korea and will attend a special charity concert, then will join them in two weeks. He  said it’s even better as Jae could keep me company over the next month. So Yun decided o visit her parents so she left for the two weeks. She said she will be back when Jae lives so I won’t feel lonely. I knew spending a month alone after such a confession and taking my feelings to another step will be hard. But it wasn’t something I couldn’t handle.

There have been a lot of interest from Media on the day of their departure. I went with them to airport. I needed to say goodbye before they had been attacked by their fans. Jae as Hyun Joongs said was there to keep me company and get me back safely home. I was asked to pose to few ictures by some off SS501 fans. Jae also gave some autographs and smiled to all flashes around. We were forced to leave before plane took off, as I was worried Jae might loose all his hair as fans started to grab his head. At the beginning it was awkward between me and him. I was rather quiet since I didn’t know him well. Sure he was heavenly handsome and new Hyun Joong well but he made me feel shy for some reason. It took us whole ride home before we actually started taking.

It was getting more and more comfortable and he asked me to join them in the dancing studio. We talked about website I was looking after for them and he thought it was great idea to see them in action. I agreed. I needed to find a bit more about them, if I wanted to run fansite smoothly. I have made a phone call to my boss and told him about the plans. He agreed that it was an amazing idea.

For the next few days I was constantly with Jaejoong, staking practises of DBSK, radio shows, meetings. During their photoshoot for one of the popular kpop magazine I was sitting in the sofa of the studio with my laptop. I made a blog and was discovering DBSK “Secrets” to fans. Of course I didn’t put anything that could hurt boys but was describing their days and funny moments. Fans loved it and traffic on web increased five times in two days. Somehow I manage to stay in shadows but there came a time when fans noticed me. As they already knew my face it was a big mystery for them, why I am around Jaejoong. Most of them probably thought I was in Japan.  Boys tried to cover this up but it wasn’t that easy. At the beginning everyone believed in a simple explanation. I offered to distance myself from them but Jae said it’s not needed.

-          To be honest I like you having here – he said one day. I must admit it scared me.

I did like all of them. And Jae was an amazing guy but I couldn’ t stop thinking about Jung Min. I got a bit shy around him again and it came to time when he actually decided to talk.

-          Joey? Can e have a word? – he was serious. It was one of late afternoons at the end of first week.

-          Sure – I responded a bit shaky.

I was praying silently that he wouldn’t have some crazy idea in his head.

-          Can you tell me what is wrong today? – he looked at me.

-          What do you mean? – I asked pretending I have no clue what is he talking about.

-          Since I tell you last time I like having you around, you became weird…. Wait a minute…. – something came to his mind. –You think I …. No .. Really? – M face went red. – Joey you have nothing to worry about. I like you…. But as a little sister. I am sorry if I made you feel uncomfortable – he giggled and ruffled my hair like I was a kid.

-          Are you honest? – I double checked.

-          Positive – he smiled. – Come I will drop you off home.

Since then we came back to our normal selves. We became rather close. Of course when I talked with Jung Min on the phone I told him everything. He called me “pabo” and kept saying he missed me. Days were going fast. Last of my days  with DBSK I watched their charity concert. They had been awesome. I could only look from back of stage as I didn’t want to get any media attention. My relationship started to get quiet in papers and internet. I remember that one of their song reminded me how I have met Jung Min, and from one to another I told Jae my story. We had been backstage after concert. We talked for a while waiting as fans calm down outside a bit. He was shocked learning that my relationship with Jung Min was fake at the beginning. His face changed when I finished my story. Telling him that made me even closer to him. Little I knew then, that my story will backfire on me.

When DBSK left  I started to spend my days on designing web and eating out with So Yun. She told me about million times how great her holidays were. We also established that I will keep her little secret.

I was really missing Jung Min and the boys. I grew to be around them and now when Jae was also gone I became a bit lost. It was day before his return when something caught my attention online. I also noticed people following me in town. I admit I had few fans but I swear these people belonged to media. Something wasn’t right. I checked one of kpop sites and I almost got  heart attack. In the first page there was a picture with me and Jae backstage. There was no mention of romance or anything. There was something worse. I wasn’t sure what to do. In big letters there have been a post:

“Joanne admits that her relationship with SS501 Park Jung Min is fake”

I started crying. I didn’t know what to do at all. I tried calling each boy but there was no answer. So Yun found me at home in pieces.

-          It will be ok – she said.

-          I have made a mess – I said – There was someone listening.

-          Don’t you think Jae could say something? – she asked.

-          No – I said even so I wasn’t sure. I was only hoping he would not betray me. Sure we knew each other short time but we got on so well.

In the evening I received voice message from Jung Min. He said they had photo shoot whole day and he couldn’t answer. How did  I suppose to tell him? He asked me however to not meet him at the airport. I guess he was already mad on me for what I did. He knew it was all my fault.

It surprise me when next day, around an hours after boys landed Jae stood in my door. I was confused. Jung Min didn’t want to see me.

-          Joey, I got something for you? – he said giving me a box.

I opened it and inside was a beautiful dress and shoes.

-          Get ready, put them on and I will take you somewhere.

I was confused. Didn’t he say he is not in love with me? And where was my best friend? Even so I was scared not knowing what is going on  I have put the dress on and did make up. I was stressed.

-          Don’t worry. We just need to fix the situation. We will talk to press.

I didn’t say anything but many thoughts were in my head now. Where were Jung Min and why Jae was here. I still followed Jae to his car and let me drove me to some kind of old hotel. It was even more suspicious now. Why would he took me to hotel? Did he hate me? Did he wanted to put me into another scandal?

As soon as we left the car there were many flashes and cameras around. For a moment I thought there was Makoto not far away. I guess I was more stressed than I thought. We entered a big room.  I was blindly following Jae. People were shouting and taking pictures. I was close to tears. Then at the other end of the room  I have noticed boys and So Yun?. They all have been dressed in suits and smiling. I wasn’t sure what to made up from it. And then from behind of Kyu Jong Jung Min came out. He was more handsome than ever. He was beautiful. He started at me then around. He came closer placing a soft kiss on my forhead. Then he turned around towards people around.

-          When I was doing activities in Japan something happened. There had been a rumour about our relationship – he looked at me with concern in his eyes. I didn’t see him for a month and missed him. And I couldn’t even say sorry. – As you all heard our engagement was called fake…. You were right…

My heart stopped at this moment and there have been a gasp in the room. That was it I thought. But then lights changed. It was more darker now, showing off the beauty of the room.

-          True is that we are not engaged… - he continued. I was trying to hide my face… - We never were…. – more gasps – But it’s not what you all think. It was media who assumed we are already engaged. We just didn’t deny it.

What did he try to do.

-          That’s why I would like to prove something tonight. This lady here is not my fiancé… yet….But I hope it will change tonight

I looked at him confused. Room was very quiet to the point you could hear breathing. With one swift movement Jung Min took out little box from his pocket. He kneeled in front of me. I stared at him shocked, believe red and confused.

-          We have been together but not engaged. Therefore I want you all to witness this moment.

Then he looked at me with his big shiny, eyes.

-          I know you  think I am arrogant and annoying – there were giggles in the room – I know see me acting as a kid sometimes. True is since that night when we accidently met, you have been my driving force. I want you to stay by my side. I know I am asking much. I know you hate attention you got because of me but please endure it because I don’t think I will be able to go on without you now. Will you do me an honour and marry me?

I stood there in shock. I had tears in my eyes. I was analyzing every word he said. He made it official. He wanted me in his eyes. Now I needed to make a decision if I am ready to fully step into his life and live in it….