Foolish Me

Prologue :: The Beginning Or the End

Onew threw the door to the room open in a fit of rage. His eyes widen as he observed the scene in front of him and he stumbled a few steps into the room almost falling flat in his face in his hurry. However, before he could make himself more of a fool, he felt strong hands steadying him in place and a warm, very firm chest pressing against his back.

“Calm down.” He heard Minho’s quiet whisper, his hot breath touching the back of his neck, one of his most sensitive spots; the intimate gesture was so sudden and unexpected that for a moment he almost forgot where he was, his mind taking him to another place, to another time, a soft bed of silky, white sheets, a room no one else knew about but them, he could hear his own moans echoing inside those four walls begging for the other to stop that they needed to stop before it was too late, even though he was hot, hard and more than ready to surrender to his every touch. He let out a soft gasp and it was as if he felt cold water rushing through his insides waking up from his daydream and even though he wasn’t sure why this time his voice and the feel of him so close was enough to remind him why he was there and what he had to do.

As he composed himself his eyes narrowed at Seungho for a few seconds before he turned all his attention to the man standing on his knees in front of the other. He could only see his back from the door but what he saw was more than enough. His eyes were stuck on the too fresh whip marks tainting his smooth flesh. Onew felt his blood boil and for a moment felt guilty, his confused mind reminding him to take deep breaths while he tried to suppress the need to do something he would regret later for sure. But it was just too painful to watching his beautiful Joon on his knees, with his head low, like a disobedient slave waiting for his punishment.  

While he watched silently, a voice inside of him screamed for him to get out, that he shouldn’t be here, to leave him alone, to just let him go, and then he recognized that voice as Joon’s when he had turned away, the very last time. He could remember his dark eyes filled with tears as he yelled at him, telling not to touch him that it was over that he was going to go and not come back, and Joon had been more than clear when he said he didn’t want him, that he didn’t want anything else from him ever again. And still, right now, all he wanted was to take him away from this place, something that his mind and heart for once both agreed on.

He felt Minho fingers tighten on the back of his shirt locking him in place; he didn’t even notice how his feet were betraying him and how he almost walked towards them.

“Stand up, Joon.” Onew said in a firm and composed voice that he almost couldn’t identify as his own. He saw the way his back straightened in front of him, how he slightly trembled at hearing his voice, how he clenched his hands on his knees and how he refused to look back at him. “Don’t make me say it again.” This time he was made sure to put all his power and status in his voice, something he wasn't used to doing yet. The light haired man was sure his rage was so palpable everyone in this room, no, in the entire mansion, could feel how angry he was. But the man that was kneeled in front of Seungho was probably also the only one that knew the extent of his pain at the moment.

“He was the one that came to me. Get out.” His eyes returned to Seungho at the sound of his cold voice, but Onew just glared at him in such a vicious manner so unlike his usual carefree and cheerful persona that he knew the other man had to know how restless and desperate he was. However,  the black haired man just smiled sadly at him shaking his head. “He wants this.” The whip in his hand, probably the cause of the pink, fresh marks in Joon’s back, touched the kneeled man shoulder softly, and Onew had to suppress the sudden urge to hit Minho when the hold around him tighten. "Go away now."

He wasn’t sure about what was going on, and that was his own fault. All he knew was that there was a huge hole in his heart since Lee Joon had left him two days ago. He didn’t know anything, because he had let things get this far without wanting to know anything. He refused to go deeper in the dark, even though he knew there was no other path for him but that one, still he had ignored and turned blind to everything he didn’t want to look at. He knew he had been hurting Joon and Minho because of his own unsecurity and stubbornness.

However, he knew this wasn’t Joon’s place. Not on his knees like a dog waiting to be disciplined. Not because of him.

“Seungho! Don’t do this!” He screamed this time, so out of control, his mind so full of all the things he had done wrong and all the things he should have done when he had the time that he decided he would resort to begging if he had to.

He staggered in Minho’s arms when he was hit by the whip. Seungho has thrown it at him with so much strength he could feel blood trickling from a cut on his cheek and now he was looking at him with such hate that Onew paused for a moment in surprise. And then he elbowed Minho with impatience and he heard the other scoff before his arm was again around his waist. He knew he was trying to protect him but he was tired of being treated like a child. This was the way everyone treated him, his team, his leaders, even his enemies. Everyone always thought him too naïve, too innocent, too stupid to take action, no one ever acknowledged him, everyone just kept underestimating him.

“I’ll tell you one last time. Onew.” Seungho’s voice started as cold as ice. “He was the one that came back. He knew what was going to happen when he did. It was his choice. Stop making a fool of yourself and leave.” He didn’t listen to a single word he was saying, he didn’t care to listen to it.

“Joon. I’m sorry. Please don’t do this. You don’t belong here. Not anymore. Please.” Onew tried to put months of memories together into his pleading. He wasn’t sure why he had come back here, not after everything that had happened between them, even if he didn’t want them to be together anymore he knew this was wrong. This place was a past that Joon had been happy to get rid of. He lowered his head staring at the floor, his mind running with odd useless thoughts while others like pieces to a puzzle started to fall together. “Joon..I’ll do anything..” He murmured softly in distress when the other didn’t answer or even moved. “.. Please. This is not-”

“I’m sorry, Jinki. Just go.” And at that moment when he heard the soft and low whisper he gave up. He never thought that his beloved voice could break his heart into one thousand tiny pieces.

A/N: Damn it seems like I haven't written anything decent in ages.. and this is two pages of y writing. I'm so not happy with it and I got no idea where I'm going with this story, which also pisses me off.. but I'm kind of excited to get into it, so I'll leave it like this..

Not sure when the next chapter will be out because I got another thing to write before I start it (that Onho ty pretty thing I got in my mind.. just need to throw some of my embarrassment away first..) but.. I'll give it a little hint for this: The next chapters will be in the past. I'll slowly get into how Onew and Joon got to meet and how they got together.. there will be also Minho.. uhh.. I think I should have left him out of this.. but while I was writing this I just couldn't do without Minho, everyone else in his place felt wrong!

Anyway.. I hope someone looks forward to this.. just don't be too excited.. *coughs* because it will take some time for me to update this..