Ashes in the wind

A stranger lived alone in the cabin on the other side of the forest. It didn’t matter to Tao what his name was, if he even had one, because he was just a Hunter. And it would only be a burden to know the name of the dangerous outsider he must kill.

The wolf-shifter crouched among the trees in his chosen form, a teenager with moonless-night hair. His eyes, slanted almost feline, shone silver against the black. Watching, learning, hating the man-Hunter.

He smelled like everything that Tao hated – fallen trees, metal, and smoke. Ashes from the fire dusted the blonde hair that fell into focused eyes as they scanned the book in his large hands. Everything about the man with broad shoulders represented the end of all that Tao held dear – the forest that was his home and the wolf-shifters who were his people.

And he was here to end that.

Without moving his spot within the trees, Tao lifted his hand and bit the tender flesh of his thumb, drawing blood. He summons the magic deep inside him and ignites it on his life-blood to create a glowing bow. Then he stood soundlessly and pulled the arrow straight back to his ear.

Gaze unwavering, Tao spoke the death-spell. “Good…”

Then it happened. An almost imperceptible move that changed everything. 

The corner of the seated man’s lip did a subtle quirk and it brought Tao’s attention down up, up towards those brown eyes that glinted. There was something in those depths. Something very real and something else that Tao didn’t know…  And that un-knowing scared him.

But before he could figure it out, the sound of tramping boots reached his ears. He had failed. Cursing, Tao turned heel and, changing back into a black wolf, melted back into the forest.

~~~

“What do you mean you could not do it?”

It was later that afternoon and he was back in the lieutenant’s den that Baekhyun had inherited with his new title. The leader’s den had sealed itself to Tao because he had yet to prove himself as the next successor after the death of his father, the previous king of the wolf-shifters. 

Tao doesn’t quite meeting his older brother’s eyes. “I could not do kill him,” he said.

Baekhyun raised a fine eyebrow.

“There was just something...that bothered me,” Tao said. “I don’t know… Something just did not feel right…” It wasn’t quite a lie.

Baekhyun considered this before shaking his head, making his cinnamon hair rustle.

“I understand,” he sighed, crossing his arms.

He picked up a small instrument from the table. It was the catalyst for Baekhyun’s magic and it became the handle for his weapon of choice – a light-whip. Normally, such instruments were used by weaker wolf-shifters who needed the extra strength. However, in Baekhyun’s hands, it worked in the opposite way. Instead of amplifying the flow, it thinned and controlled his magic flow.

“We still have time to do it right. We must exercise caution when dealing with the enemy,” Baekhyun continued. “Hunters are not fools – though, if they were, our job would be far easier.”

The younger nodded and chuckled, the corners of his lips curling up. To anyone else, it was a shy grin.

But Baekhyun knew better. “What’s wrong?” He set the weapon down.

Smile quickly fading, Tao bit his lip. “I… I just don’t know what… to do…”

There was another sigh, soft and worried. Baekhyun reached up and patted brother and best friend on the shoulder. When he spoke again, his voice was reassuring and hopeful at the same time.

“You’ll figure it out. You always do.”

~~~

It wasn’t until Tao had returned to his den that he noticed that he had lost it. The wolf fang necklace that his father had given to him on Tao’s birthday. And the day he died.

Dread sank inside him when he realized that he must’ve dropped it in his haste to escape. He returned to the spot where he had stood and agitatedly scavenged around. The stench of Hunter confused him and threw his scenting off. He snarled in frustration when he cut his hand in his haste and turned to wipe it when –

“Are you looking for this?”

Tao started so violently that he almost reverted to his wolf form. With a fluid movement, he summoned his bow and aimed it at his natural enemy’s chest.

The blonde immediately raised his hands to show that he had no weapons. “Easy there,” he said in a deep voice. Tao didn’t hear him because he saw the necklace in his hand.

“I mean you no harm,” the Hunter said, knowing where his gaze was fixed on. “My name is Kris. Here.” He set the necklace down ground and took a few steps back. “I assume that is what you are—”

In a swift movement, Tao snatched his prize. But – to the Hunter’s obvious surprise – he didn’t run or attack. He just stood there, muscles tense and refusing to break eye contact.

“Is there…?” Kris started hesitantly.

“I do not like owing my enemy,” Tao snarled. “What do you want from me? Tell me what you want.” He knew it was a dangerous promise because the oath of a wolf can never be broken. But he had pride and he had no other choice.

The blonde blinked. “Um…a thank you and name would suffice, I think. Oh and please put that bow away, it’s making me nervous.”

Tao stared. It had to be a trap, it couldn’t be that easy. He must be planning something… But he had already given his word. And, he rationalized, he was an able hand-to-hand fighter so he could still protect himself in case this … Kris … changed his mind.

He hesitated before sealing away his magic and muttering, “Zitao.” He didn’t know why he had used his real name. No one had called him that since Father passed on. “Thank … you.”

The taller’s face broke out in a smile. “Now that wasn’t so hard, was it?” Kris chuckled.

Suddenly Tao’s stomach growled. The younger’s face flushed.

Kris didn’t comment. He just turned his back to Tao and started walking back to his cabin. “Come and stay a while,” he called over his shoulder, beckoning. “I’ve been lonely for a long time.”

Tao didn’t know why, but he wanted to learn more about this strange being that had shown a high act of trust – exposing his back to him. So he waited until Kris was a fair distance before trailing along behind.

~~~

They stayed together the rest of the afternoon.

It was easy, Tao realized, as he couched by the tree outside the door and watched the Hunter. Kris didn’t ask anything of him or try to start conversation. He just went with his business, sitting down to read his book again and stoking the fire. When the food was ready, he just set the plate down and kept his distance.

As soon as Kris stepped out of range, Tao ignored the vegetables and grabbed the deer meat. He ripped through the flesh with a groan of happiness, not caring that he was being rude. It was the best tasting meat he had ever tasted and it was gone before he knew it. He didn’t notice Kris watching him from the corner of his eye, smiling.

It was nice, Tao thought, chewing on the bone, not having to talk or make decisions. That’s how it’s been after his father’s funeral. Even though he knew it was for his people’s good, Tao hadn’t had any breathing room to grieve or have time to himself.

He had forgotten what peace felt like.

Baekhyun had always been flighty as well, bustling here and there so it was only natural to be caught up in the older’s whirlwind.

Tao looked up at Kris. Up close, Kris wasn’t bad looking, though strange. The shadow from the cabin stained his dark blonde hair a deeper shade of gold-brown and accentuates his sharp features. Tao wondered if all Hunters looked like him…

“Do you need help putting that necklace back on?”

Ears flattening, Tao’s lips pulled back and he snarled, “No.”

Unfazed Kris just nodded and went back to his book.

They continued to sit in silence together until the sunlight started to turn red with evening. Shaking his head, Tao got up. He had stayed too long. He was about to leave when…

“See you later.”

Silver eyes met dark brown ones. Smiling, Kris said, “You’re welcome back any time.”

And Tao will never admit that the gentle smile on the older’s face sent a rushing warmth inside him and made him feel safe.

Not aloud at least.

~~~

Somehow, Tao found himself returning to the cabin on the other side of the forest.

Each time, he was greeted by a wave and a brighter-than-the-sun smile. And each time they would just sit together, not talking much. Occasionally Tao would ask what Kris was reading.

He came to love his time with Kris because it was the only time he could be free from his responsibilities. And Kris gave an accepting aura of warmth and calm that demanded nothing. As the days went by, the title of Hunter started to fade away…

One night, Tao showed up at Kris’s doorstep. “I couldn’t sleep,” was his only explanation. Kris nodded and let him in. They settled in before the burning fireplace, Kris sitting on the edge of his bed and Tao wrapped in a blanket on the floor. Both gazing into the dancing flames.

“What did you read about today?” Tao’s voice was barely above a whisper.

“I’m reading a book about a boy who has telepathic powers who is trying to find his place in the world, but he is hiding and suppressing his powers in order to fit in,” Kris said. “He ended up killing the one he loved before committing suicide because he couldn’t handle the pain.” He shook his head. “You should never have to hide who you are. Or be someone you’re not.”

Pulling the blanket closer, Tao considered this before saying, quietly, “K-Kris?”

“Hmmm?”

Tao took a shaking breath. “I-I have something to confess.”

Those dark eyes meet in the semi-darkness. They gazed at each other for a moment before Kris said, “I’m listening.”

“I-I am a wolf-shifter.”

Kris doesn’t respond. There was no surprise or hate or any emotion in any of his body language.

Tao didn’t understand. “Why? Why are you not…?” he asked, eyes searching Kris’s.

The older shrugged. “I had always known.”

Throwing off the blanket and standing up, Tao accused, “You – you deceived me!”

“Did I?”

Tao stopped, unable to think of a response.

Kris stood up too and stalked forward, dark eyes boring into Tao’s. “Did I deceive you? You knew who I was, what I was, yet you kept coming back. Tao, do you even know why I am here alone?” He let out a frustrated sigh. “I am here to break the curse. To break the curse that my ancestor had cast upon the wolf-shifters. Why must you and your people have to suffer for one misunderstanding?”

The bottom of Tao’s lip trembled.

“My great-grandmother had cursed you and your people when she was rejected,” Kris continued. “Yet why must we suffer for her hate? As long as I am alive, the curse lives.”

He slumped down onto the bed and buried his face in his hands. Heart reaching out, Tao settled in beside him.

“So many times I’ve thought of killing myself.” Kris’s voice was muffled. “But all the texts indicate that I cannot do that. Even then, I can’t raise the dagger because I’m a stinking, no-good coward.”

“No.”

This time it was Kris’s turn to stop. He lifted his head.

Tao’s eyes are intent as they meet Kris’s. “Maybe we were supposed to meet and figure this out together. There has to be another way… you don’t have to die… I don’t want you to…”

Kris let out a sound and pulled Tao close. His lips rested gently in Tao’s hair. They had touched before, brushes here and there, but this was the first time anyone had held Tao since his father died. He had forgotten how much he missed someone’s touch. Tao could feel the heat of the tears that fell from Kris’s eyes because they fell from his too.

The night passed on in silence with them wrapped up in each other. When the fire had died out with a small splutter, Kris spoke again.

“You’ve stopped cringing from me,” he noted, deep voice muffled in the rush of Tao’s hair.

It was then that Tao realized that he had forgotten the scent of Hunter. Everything that he hated, everything he should hate yet everything he couldn’t hate because, beneath the scent of cut trees, metal, and smoke, he fell in love with the man.

Tao clutched at the front of Kris’s shirt with trembling hands and somehow, between tears and mingled breaths, their lips met in the quiet darkness. They kissed with a desperate need, the brush of bare skin and heat silent affirmations that in this cold, cruel world, they still had each other.

~~~

Baekhyun found Tao at the forest edge the next afternoon.

“Where have you been? I’ve been—” Thin lips curled back in a grimace. “Tao, you reek of Hunter,” he accused, taking a step back and wolf ears flattening.

“Sorry,” Tao said, not looking up as he continued to test the magic inside him. His head still pounded from that morning.

He had woken and left Kris’s cabin before the older had woken. To his horror, he not only had physical marks against the skin but he also had marks invisible to the eye. Kris’s presence had sapped his magic, leaving him emptier than he had ever been.

He felt Baekhyun’s narrowed eyes on him. “You…” he said. “You have Hunter touch all over you. They have touched you.” Amber eyes widened. “What happened? Did they hurt you? Tao? What is happening to you?”

His piercing eyes search Tao’s face. Then as if he found the answer in Tao’s expression, Baekhyun let out a howl of understanding, anger, and pain. The betrayal flooded his veins and was so overwhelming that Baekhyun almost lost his grip on his form.

“Look at you,” the redhead snarled, shaking with suppressed rage. “Crumbling away like some unnourished flower. And for a Hunter.” He spat the last word. “What have you done, Tao? What have you brought upon yourself, us, your people? Do you not care for them? What would Father think—?”

“I am not Father!” Tao whipped around. His hold on his shape slipped – black hair bristling like fur, lengthening fangs and raised shackles. “Nor am I your puppet.” Silver eyes narrowed. “And how would you know what Father would have wanted?”

Baekhyun was never one to back down from a challenge. His amber eyes flashed.

“You ungrateful brat,” he said. “Do you know what Father, what I have sacrificed for our people’s freedom?” With every question, Baekhyun stepped forward, his fiery presence setting the space aflame.

“Who took care of you – a helpless baby – when Mother died and when Father was away? I did.” Each word crawled through gritted teeth. “Who stood by while Father played favorites? I did. Who gave up his birthright as the firstborn male? I did. Why? All because I believed you would be the better leader.”

The boiling rage inside Tao stole his voice as he fought to control his temper.

“Maybe I was wrong.” The last phrase hung in the air, precariously balanced.

Against his will, the statement stole the anger and replaced it with tears that threatened to fall from Tao’s eyes. He turned away.

Seeing the younger’s watering eyes, Baekhyun calmed. The flames simmered down. When he spoke again, his voice was smooth.

“We should not fight. We both only want the best for our people,” he said. “We are brothers through more than just blood. Speak to me, my brother.”

Still Tao didn’t answer.

“Claim your birthright, Tao,” Baekhyun said, walking over and resting his forehead against Tao’s chest. “I will not rest until you have become king.”

Tao couldn’t help the shiver and the tears that rolled down his cheek.

~~~

“I will kill you.”

Despite knowing that he shouldn’t go back with Baekhyun’s close watch, Tao couldn’t stop himself from going to Kris’s place again. Kris seemed to sense the restlessness when he showed up at his door and pulled Tao into his arms and home without question.

“I know,” Kris replied, trailing his finger against his collarbone. “My death is inevitable at some point. By your hand or by your comrades. This war won't be over in our lifetime.” He looked at Tao. “But I'd rather die by yours. I know you gain new powers if you kill me…”

Tao bit his lip.

“Did you ever want to kill me?”

“No!” The word tumbled out before Tao can stop himself. Then he blushed and ducked his head beneath Kris’s piercing gaze. Loving Kris was better than gaining a thousand new powers, though Tao would never voice that thought.

But Kris seemed to know what the younger wasn’t saying.

Leaning over, the older pulled him close and strung his fingers through Tao’s. “Ah,” Kris breathes into his ear. “That makes all the difference in the world.”

~~~

Tao had always known that their precious moments together were too good to last.

The moon was reaching its zenith when Baekhyun and soldiers ambushed them. Tao yelled out and reached for Kris, but they are pulled apart before he could protect them. While the soldiers pushed Tao to the edge of his range, Baekhyun used his magic to form his shining whip that made quick work of rendering the taller immobile.

“You leave me with no choice, Tao,” Baekhyun snarled. His slender fingers wrapped around Kris’s neck, cutting off his cry. “I have waited long enough. Destiny does not wait for anyone.” His expression deepened. “Maybe I will claim what should have been mine.”

Baekhyun’s amber eyes were pitiless when they meet Tao’s as he struggled against his captor’s. “Tonight we will decide who will be king – you or me.”

“Baekhyun! You can’t – ”

“Do not,” the redhead cut over, “tell me what I can or cannot do. Make your choice, Tao.”

He remembered what Kris had told him not long ago. It was after Kris had revealed that he had known what Tao was all along.

“I know there will be a day when you must kill me,” Kris had said.

Tao bowed his head. His muscles loosened. “Let me go,” he said.

“Have you decided?”

“Yes.”

Baekhyun’s grin widened when he saw the look of defeat. He nodded at the soldiers who did as they were told and stepped back.

Tao stood up slowly. The weight of the moment seemed to steal the fluidity from his limbs until he was stiff and numb. But he felt detached. Still gazing straight ahead, he lifted his hand and bit the tender flesh of his thumb, drawing blood.

“When the time comes, consider me a stranger or yourself an actor. What we say are just lines in a play. It will make it easier.”

Summoning the last reserves of his magic, Tao created his glowing bow, pulling the arrow straight back to his ear. Baekhyun’s smile widened, but Tao barely noticed. He had only eyes for the kneeling man who had seen more of him than anyone else had.

“But I only wish for one thing.”

“Anything.”

A sad smile flickered across those sharp features as Kris pulled him close, his lips warm against Tao’s forehead. “I only ask that the last thing that I see is your eyes.” His hands find and grip smaller ones. Tao felt the tremble in the touch. “I don’t mind facing the darkness if I have moonlight behind me.”

He gazed into Kris’s trusting eyes and, though he quivered, his grip and gaze was strong and didn’t waver. Then, tears streaming down his cheeks, Tao spoke the word.

“Good…bye.”

Kris fell, almost soundlessly.

There was a surge of new power from deep inside Tao as the Hunter slumped, dead weight as the rope-collar cut into the skin of his neck. It pounded inside him like a second heartbeat, overpowering his senses and overthrowing his mind.

Tao’s eyes fluttered close and with one last thought of the man with trusting eyes, his world fades to ash-black, the pieces scattered on the wind.

“Father?”

“Yes, Zitao?”

“Why do you fight so hard against the Hunters?”

That large hand, battle- and weather-worn, reached over to pull him close. “I fight for you, little one,” he said. “So that one day you can live you own life and always run free. So that you will never be hated for what you are. So that you will find someone that you can love above all else and that someday you will be loved in return for who you are.”

----

A/N: Homigod, I swear this sounded so much better in my head /creys/

I’m SO sorry for doing this again (this word vomit and cutting short for contests and contests and word vomit and angst) I'll make sure to edit

I'm so sorry RenaBunny and ClaireKrystalWinters ;A; I hope I didn’t disappoint you ‘cause I’m plenty disappointed in myself.

OHKAI’KAYTHNXBYE.