Precious Winter’s Child

Chapter 1

Kyuhyun was tired. That was to be expected of course. The last month or so had been nothing short of a whirlwind for him, from award shows to albums, concerts to fanmeets, spread across three countries at atleast and he was not even talking about having to rush from Malaysia to Korea to jump right into his MCing commitments. At some point in time, something would have to give and he can’t claim he is surprised that it’s his body.

It’s always the first to go though. The aches and pains sneaking up on you until you don’t know what to do, or what to say, wanting to scream at everyone you know that your back hurts and all you want to do is sit and read a comic or maybe play a game and sleep in a warm bed with a warm body. Yet despite that sort of feeling, all you end up doing is hiding the cold and smiling as brightly as you could since they were all tired as well and you refused to be a burden to any of them, to worry that very special person.

 He rather fake the smile than let anyone worry about him in that moment, pushing the tiredness down , so as not to make anyone concerned, so as not to have him worry endless….though he does think he could do with a bit of his coddling right about then.

He sincerely thinks warm hands and bright eyes will be the cure for his illness, much better than the glass of French Bordeaux Pomerol that he was casually sipping. He can admit though, that the sweetness and texture of a fine vintage does tug on his higher consciousness, making his mind more open to the feeling of lightness that a good vintage always evoked in him, yet wanting to whack that annoying voice in the back of his mind insisting that the scent of coffee and cinnamon was a lot more intoxicating, wanting to murder it for always drawing his mind to that point, yet smiling secretly to himself as he remembered the last time he was able to drown in such sweetness, frowning when he notes that it was much too long ago. The endless schedules damaging his time with his personal form of intoxication, feeling resentment all of a sudden for stupid schedules and idiot beloveds that couldn’t seem to allocate enough time for him.

It was all really pitiful, stretching his neck, feeling a cramp, which had been happening frequently, the soft pains a feature of his life currently, twisting his neck to pull in back into place, sniffling a groan, sipping at his delicious vintage he had ered Changmin into buying, smiling at the thought of his best friend having to shell out the considerable figure required for him to be permitted to sip on such a vintage.

 He doesn’t even feel guilty.

It’s the least a friend could do for a friend about to celebrate his 26^th birthday, especially after you insisted on dragging that friend out for a drink even after you were told that he was dead tired and was in the midst of a horrible promotion period in another country and trying to learn Mandarin and quite possibly aware that he missed his significant other, who had been annoying him as of late. So really with all that being said, Changmin should be grateful he only wanted the wine and nothing else.

He had just finished with Music Core recording and then a gruelling practice session for them to fix the choreography for when they performed the both versions of the song  when his idiot best friend and Minho had corned him at the practice room, insisting that he go out with them to celebrate his birthday the following day. He honestly wasn’t in the mood, feeling his back lurch and his shoulders stiff and he still had to do it all again on the following day for Inkigayo, having spent the majority of the week doing weird things on variety shows in China, his back still hurting from his fail bowling, Eunhyuk and Siwon still laughing at him at any opportunity that they could, his pride taking a beating that he did not appreciate.

Seriously! He needed to get out more and be more active.

He was turning out to be quite a fail when it came to sports and it was starting to worry him. He had never been the outdoor type he had to admit, but never considered himself to lack athletic ability at any point in time. Now that was coming into question was not a good thing, even Yesung with his annoying self, sparing the time ask if he was incapable. Kyuhyun was rather displeased thereafter to be expected.

Clearly, if he had the time to annoy Kyuhyun with cheeky questions then he should be willing to accept his share of the blame. Kyuhyun was positive that Yesung's entire need to be a ‘Fail’ at things was starting to rub off on him. That was his story anyway and he was determined to stick to it. He was going to blame it all on Yesung. 

Thankfully the knowledge of his failing sporting nature seemed to have eluded his best friends, particularly Minho, who may have had his hide just had the sheer horror of the thought of being associated with someone who lacked such supporting ability. He supposes thought, that if they were intent on dragging him out to celebrate with them, mentioning his lack of skill would not have been the best method. He had in fact been very reluctant to accept their invitation.

By the time Changmin approached him, he was dead tired with the stage and the waiting and just the general frustration of a much too long week away from his personal energizer and was actually rather keen on just going back to the dorms and getting some sleep. It really was that long of a week. So long and tedious that he was actually willing to forsake a good vintage for some sleep. Life had been hard on his he decided. 

He tried telling Changmin that he wanted to sleep, but the idiot would just say that was nonsense and drag him out of the room. He thought that the other members would make an objection on his behalf, but Donghae and Siwon had insisted that he should go out and have some fun with his friends. He supposed that they were just trying to help him or maybe they thought he could use the fun. He could see the logical argument and he could admit that deep inside he knew it could and more than likely be fun, but that tiredness was warping his mind and making him feel very lethargic and unwilling to do anything but sleep and sleep curled up with a particularly warm body at that, but he didn’t know how likely that was, so maybe the drinking would be a better alternative.

With that decided he allowed Changmin to promise his manager that he would be home safely and that they would be careful and keep out of trouble and then drag him to the car where Minho was waiting, apparently deciding that he really was not in a position to say no. He supposed he should have known that with a stubborn bastard like Changmin, he never had a real chance of escaping, pushed into the backseat, and forced to settle, thereafter listening to the chatter, contributing a teasing remark or two ever so often.

Minho it seems decided on a private lounge that they visited sometimes, Kyuhyun actually expecting them to go to Changmin’s new apartment, where they wouldn’t have to be so jumpy and they could just relax, but he supposed they would all be tired of being cooped up in small rooms and maybe felt that a change was in order. He didn’t care to complain, at that point willing to embrace the change in circumstances, thinking quite firmly that since he could not exactly escape he might as well try to enjoy, pushing the tiredness to the back of his mind, trying to be cooperative.

The lounge was exactly as he remembered it, dark and tastefully decorated, carrying that cabaret feel to it, dark earthy colours and dim lighting, the sort of place a man drowned his sorrows in bourbon, lost to the imaginary fog that places like that always seem to carry. It was not the activity of a nightclub or the openness of a bar, just a place that they could sit at a nice oddly cosy corner lounge and get lost in the darkness, away from fans and even friends. It was always that sort of feeling and he supposed that was why they chose that place.

 They were probably aware that he was not up for anything too active and figured some quite privacy would be the right course of action and maybe, if he was being kind to his friend, supposed that Changmin remembered that the lounge carried one of the best collection of red wines in the city and was the perfect place to be if that was your drink of choice. At that hour of the night and the fact that he would have endless schedules the following day, there was not a chance in hell he would be drinking anything other than red wine, so all in all it was a good choice, getting lost in the small corner, warmer than outside thankfully, taking off his coat and trying to embrace the atmosphere, suggesting to Changmin that he get them a nice bottle of, 1999 Chateau Trotanoy, Pomerol ,Changmin’s eyes widening, aware that it did not come cheap, shocked when his friend was willing to shell out atleast $500USD for a bottle of wine for him, Changmin shaking his head as he made the order.

Kyuhyun was more than surprised, but couldn’t say he regretted it as he sat there sipping on the silky fruity, earthy flavour, thinking that it was his only salvation, body lounging against the soft sofa like chair, letting his sore muscles find some peace, nursing the pretty, well shaped, glass in his long fingers, trying to enjoy the peacefulness or rather, would be peacefulness, of the lounge if Changmin would just shut up for two minutes. He wasn’t annoyed though, more amused than anything else, or he would have been if he could get his mind to settle, unfortunately somehow returning to a place it shouldn’t, feeling sort of sulky for some unknown reason.

Well….maybe he did know.

It was the tiredness and the frustration and the residual anger and the fact that he missed him so damn much and just everything falling down on him, trying his hardest not to get into that negative sort of mindset, aware that he was purposely overdramatic, but it was just that sort of feeling, his mind sated in this sort of haze, neither unhappy or happy, thinking of is future, worrying about the days to come, about missing someone more than he should, aware that each year meant that sooner or later he would have to make choices that would bring him pain, the dark days ahead, forced to wonder if it would be like the week he was having. He was tired of airplanes and he was dead tired of schedules, but he could endure all of that.

What could not do however, was be so apart from someone special.

It felt like a lifetime since he was able to hold him close and just be with him. Somehow or the other the older man was busy and with his schedule he didn’t even have breathing room, much less the time to spend with him, hyper aware now that every second was precious. It was his birthday though. He was one year older, and hopefully he would be more mature, thinking that he really should just learn to get accustomed to that sort of feeling, vaguely aware that it was just not something that a person got accustomed to. He was resigned to being sulky there after, positive that nothing could shift his mood exactly, trying hard however to feel more relaxed and to embrace the opportunity.

He honestly did not have much time to spend with his friends, not having a free day since the New Year, either in China or Japan most of the time, aware that he was probably not a good friend in recent times. Take it as it was, and it would be a golden opportunity for him. He supposed that was why the others insisted that he go out rather than return to the dorms, probably thinking that now was the only time he would probably get to celebrate his birthday with his friends. Since he had a schedule the following day and had practice, his time would be short, aware that he would be expected to atleast go see his parents and probably have a meal, something that he was looking forward to as well, then his brothers may want to have a small party for him, and that would take a little time, and most importantly he wanted to atleast try and sneak a few hours with Yesung somewhere in the middle of the day.

He couldn’t spend his birthday without him, but tempered by the fact that he was not sure what the other man had planned for the day and a little worried about where he would fit it all into the day, positive that he would not have had the opportunity to spend any time with Minho or Changmin, so was thereafter resolved to make the best of the situation, smiling to himself as he listened to Changmin.

Kyuhyun biting back a snicker, covertly shaking his head as he listened vaguely to Changmin complain endlessly on about his other member, his friend going into detail as to why Yunho annoyed the hell out of him as of recent. Kyuhyun was not surprised by the content of his complains; Changmin being prone to complaining about his leader and perhaps ‘better half’ , once more biting back a snicker.

Changmin was by nature really whiny and was better suited to indifference than he was to petty complaints but somehow all that maturity and self containment seemed to disappear when it came to Yunho, generally having endless grievances against the older man, that he repeatedly deemed to be a ‘childish idiot’, that apparently ‘annoyed the hell out of him’, since it would seem ‘Yunho can’t take care of his *words Kyuhyun wouldn’t repeat since even in his mind he heard Yesung's disapproving voice* self’.

The worst part was how serious he was about it all.

 It was like he didn’t even realize how ridiculous it was all, especially when he grumbled endless about how clingy he thinks Yunho and his desire to be free of the bastard. Kyuhyun thinks it’s all hilarious to be honest. If he were in a better mood he would have probably be laughing his off by now, just amused by the stupidity of his friends. He really wonders when Changmin would just admit that missed Yunho. The more he complained, the more obvious it was that he missed his band mate more than he should, Kyuhyun remembering Changmin mentioning that Yunho would be off shooting his drama and not be around as much anymore, their schedules conflicting, except for their concerts. The longer Yunho is busy, the more Changmin would miss him and then the complaints would just get worse.

 Kyuhyun sort of felt sorry for the idiot.

 It must be hard to miss Yunho that much, unable to stop the loud snicker when Changmin started on his now famous habit of listing all the things he was grateful for now that he lived alone and not with Yunho, Kyuhyun rather amused as he recounts the happiness of his toothpaste tube that no longer had to endure the barbaric hands of Yunho, Changmin muttering out loud that he wondered how Yunho was coping on that front, the situation much too ridiculous for Kyuhyun to keep a straight face even in his less than stellar mood, after that one, snickering quite comprehensively, Changmin stopping in mid rant to look at him.

“Why?” simple question directed to Kyuhyun, the other man looking at him with a raised eyebrow, his eyes slightly mismatched as he regarded him with more intensity than he should, Kyuhyun supposing that he really should stop snickering but Changmin’s face was much too funny, the other man looking much too interested and curious, his eyes narrowing the longer Kyuhyun took, Minho looking between the two, a small smile playing on his lips.

 Kyuhyun was positive Changmin knew what he was laughing at. This sort of thing was common with Changmin now and they both generally allowed him to complain as much as he wanted, listening politely or atleast they tried not to laugh at him openly, normally biting back the snickers or chuckles, depending on how bad his complaints were, ranging in degree and scope. Normally it didn’t take long, just maybe ten minutes of so, but the more he seemed to miss him the more the complaints came and the willpower it took to not laugh at him was always strained at that time. Kyuhyun honestly couldn’t hold it in much longer and thinks Changmin should be grateful that he was too tired to really take the piss out of him.

“When are you going to admit that you just miss having him around?” Kyuhyun questioned, aware that it was rude to answer a question with a question, but in that case he thinks it was fairly well acceptable and judging by the fact that Changmin’s eyes had just gotten wider and looks rather offended if the pull of his thin lips is anything to go by.

Changmin’s once wide eyes narrowing nearly dangerously, pulling to glare at Kyuhyun, his jaw taking a rigid countenance, almost as if he didn’t believe Kyuhyun would be so bold as to suggest something like that to him. If he expected Kyuhyun to back down though he would have been rather foolish, Kyuhyun never in a mood to back down and could see no reason to do the same now. Changmin was not truly upset, but he was practically begging to be teased.

Why did he pretend that he did not miss Yunho was beyond Kyuhyun’s understanding.

He didn’t think he would ever understand the sort of relationship Changmin had with Yunho. He knew that Min adored the older man however and all his complaints were really just his frustration and the emotion involved. He honestly thought it would be better if Changmin just accepted that he was unnaturally attached to Yunho and put all of them out of their misery. Pretending the man annoyed him or rather pretending that he did not miss him couldn’t be good for his psyche. He was sure Yunho annoyed Changmin though, which was actually really funny. The way the older man got under his friends skin and yet seem to evoke that sort of fondness that Changmin refused to acknowledge was always, as a general rule, amusing to him. He supposed that he should be a little less provoking but in his sulky state maybe that was what he needed most. It was not as if Changmin couldn’t take it. The glare that he was shooting, clearly saying supporting that believe.

“When are you going to admit that are you always thinking about almond shaped eyes?” Changmin asked right back when it became clear to him that Kyuhyun had no intention of retracting his statement, lifting his eyebrows in a mocking way. As far as he was concerned, two could play that game, and he dare say he was much better that it....Missing Yunho?? ...pfff!!! like that was possible!

Kyuhyun however, regarding the other with a subdued expression, trying not to react in the truest form. He knew that Changmin really was not one to be underestimated, but he really did not think he would go there. He expected a thinly veiled threat and him making a scathing comment about Kyuhyun sensibilities or lack of sporting ability, not for him to mention Kyuhyun’s deep dark secret, especially not for him to mention it with the unaware Minho sitting right there, capable possibly of discerning what the other could of meant. It was sort of a low move really, Kyuhyun trying not to freak out too much and give Changmin the satisfaction, giving Changmin a challenging stare as to indicate that it was not over in the least and to fake bravado, his heart thumping in his chest, wondering if he were obvious with his thoughts and  left to wonder if Changmin was just trying to bait him.

There was no realistic way that he could have known that Kyuhyun was thinking about Yesung…right? He prayed he was not that transparent, trying to fix his face and give no indication of the panic that was previously settling in his heart, wondering how he should respond in such an instance, whilst being aware that Minho now looked slightly confused and he was threading on thin ice, Changmin looking much too pleased with himself and it was annoying Kyuhyun.

“The same day that you stop acting as if you don’t need Yunho” Kyuhyun shot back with some intensity, his voice low and suggestive, challenging to say the least, not taking his eyes off Changmin, ensuring that the other man knew that he was just as intent on following through as he was, never the sort to back down from a challenge and he was sort of offended that Changmin played dirty.

Mentioning anything related to Yesung was dirty.

Considering that Changmin knew he was not in a position to confirm or deny anything in relation to that but deliberately went along that line, made it a low move. It was sneaky and the bastard was sly and if he let him get away with it then he would be the laughing of stock of the their little group, though thankfully so far Minho seemed to be lacking a proper understanding of the occurrence, just looking at Kyuhyun with wide eyes.

 Kyuhyun supposed he was just in awe at his bravery.

It was rare anyone would ever have the courage to say something like that to Changmin. His relationship and dependency or lack of it had always been a heated subject, that either provided laughter or some serious disagreement. Kyuhyun was brave enough to chance it and was of the opinion that Changmin had better learn to deal with it. If he wanted to avoid that sort of conversation he should have been sensible enough to know that it was much better to never mention Yesung, Kyuhyun refusing to blush after he had made it so far into the discourse, wanting to kick himself for being so love sick and allowing comments like the previous ones to have an effect, trying his hardest to hold his nerve.

These little games with Changmin were fun but they were surely very dangerous to either of them.

 Changmin knew the secrets he kept even if Kyuhyun refused to admit to it. Kyuhyun on the other hand had no idea what sort of relationship Changmin had with Yunho, other than he was very attached to him and got even more nagging when Yunho was not around to cling to him and supposedly annoy him. It was a very odd situation that Kyuhyun would avoid, but it was also the easiest way to pull Min down a peg or two, the smirk that was forming beautifully on his apparently model features falling away rapidly to form a displeased caught expression.

 It was clear that he was caught whether to immediately deny it, like the delusional idiot he was or if he should try and think it through. Kyuhyun thought it was amusing to see him like that, though he was very much aware that he could figuratively be poking a hornet’s nest, Changmin a worthy rival, who could do as much damage or more to him. Why did they play these games again? He thinks it’s because they are both stubborn and never like to back down or maybe they just like testing the wheels in their minds or maybe they just want to see who really is the most evil of them both. Whatever it was Kyuhyun was always both excited and terrified about these wars of words that they seem to think was appropriate in the circumstances.

Kyuhyun is startled when Changmin looks away, sure that the other man is in no way the type to give up or give way, much too prideful for that sort of thing. Kyuhyun immediately concerned as to what exactly was running through that nearly diabolical mind of his. With Changmin it could be a war stately, Kyuhyun concerned and embarrassed. Normally when someone looked away he was sure he won that little battle, but with Changmin it could mean he was going to be eaten alive.

He was resolved however not to show fear.

 Changmin was formidable but he still had a fairly large arsenal at his disposal and he was not afraid to use it. Changmin had his fair share of weaponry but he would never be able to use that nuclear type ammunition---Not with Minho there with them, sipping on his scotch, looking between the two with raised eyebrows and Kyuhyun knew—keeping score.  It was within his nature to do so, Kyuhyun supposing that they should be pleased that they atleast  could entertain their young friend, even if they both had reason to be concerned whether or not he would decipher the true meaning of their words, or at least Kyuhyun did anyway. Kyuhyun keeping his eyes on the slightly younger man, particularly interested in his response, not sure how to react when Changmin’s face softens and he releases a short chuckle, not touched with bitterness in the least, actually humour filled and Kyuhyun is ashamed to admit that he couldn’t decide what it meant.

“Been having a hard time I see” Changmin observed with a chuckle when he turned back towards him, mismatched eyes sparkling with humour, a small playful smirk kissing his lips, his head lifting just the right way to let the question be challenging in that mocking sort of way, Kyuhyun not buying for a second that Changmin was concerned for his wellbeing, the teasing mocking nature of his words clear to him if not Minho, whose eyes opened in a  manner that indicated that he was weighing the words, wondering Kyuhyun was alright.

 Changmin kept his damning eyes on him, Kyuhyun thinking he should punch him in the face for it. He stupidly wonders if that is how Yesung must fell when dealing with him, finding it annoying yet somehow finding some admiration for the other man’s obvious skill in teasing, Changmin looking pleased with himself. Kyuhyun chuckles but it is not even close to the humour that Changmin had, very much aware that he was indeed having a hard time. Kyuhyun also very much aware that Changmin was in no way referring to his endless schedules, but instead his displeasure at the lack of time he could spend with someone special, Changmin blatantly mocking him.

Kyuhyun was intent however, on staying as calm and neutral as possible, not wanting to give more away than he should, not wanting to tap into his displeasure and his sadness, positive that Changmin was a bastard...a skilled bastard though, once more chuckling, wondering  if he should really go there with Changmin. It would be dangerous of course, but so much fun.

He is precluded from responding however when Minho interrupts.

“What are you guys talking about?” Minho asked with a raised eyebrows and quirked lips, the question embedded in his expression, clearly having reached his end point with the two speaking in what appeared to be some sort of code that he didn’t understand.

 He didn’t think they deliberately intended to make him feel left out or at least he hoped they did not but after a while the curiosity was just too much for him to bear. It was not as if he was unaccustomed to them being like that, ashamed to admit that he was often left out of such discussions, not by intent but probably circumstances, the two taking great joy ribbing each other. He often wished to contribute but could recognize that he was not exactly in their leagues but was happy when he could add his own two scents.

 So far he was willing to sit and listening to the exchanges, find the humour in them and pleased with the fact that his hyungdeul were so amusing and sharp tongued, but that feeling that he was missing something was digging into his chest. It was clear that they were speaking in riddles and he was at least smart enough to recognize that he was missing something significant, especially with Kyuhyun. Changmin’s words were much too curt and cut for it to be anything else, though he could understand why Kyuhyun chose to ask about Yunho. It was a bit of a running joke between him and Kyuhyun, both insistent that Changmin’s complaints were just his attachment to their hyung. This time however, he knew that it had a higher meaning and was honestly just caught in his curiosity, not wanting to be left out further.

He waits a minute for so for the answer he does not get.

The time feels impossibly long for him, especially since both Kyuhyun and Changmin both decide that it was better to look down at their drinks at just that moment, Kyuhyun swirling the wine in the pretty glass, taking a breath before he took a gulp, eyes trained on the cup, only looking up to smile at him half heartedly before he took another generous sip, not seeming likely to open his mouth anytime soon, Minho not sure if it was by circumstance or design, not seeing why Kyuhyun would have a real reason to ignore the question, figuring that he just wanted to continue drinking. Changmin however looked uncomfortable, eyeing Kyuhyun in a mild regretful sort of way, playing with the napkin on the table, trying for a smile that seemed forced in Minho’s estimation, but he was willing to accept that maybe Changmin was displeased with the Yunho talk. He was sort of ill tempered in relation to that. That is what made it so amusing.

Seeing that they did not seem likely to answer as of yet, he wagered that some prodding might be in order.

“Do you like someone Kyuhyun Hyung? Is it someone I know?” Minho questioned as a means to get his curiosity quenched. So far they were much too nonresponsive, so maybe it would have been better if he asked the questions as a means of guiding his hyungdeul into what was really the questions that were at the forefront of his mind.

From what he could gather from the conversation, Kyuhyun seemed to like someone? It did seem likely from the way that Changmin was talking to him. Normally Kyuhyun would just say if he thought some girl was hot or if she had a nice or a well defined chest. He hadn’t mentioned anything serious however in quite a while, but maybe that was what Changmin was teasing him about. Maybe Changmin knew he liked someone? It seemed very likely to him, especially when his mind sort of replayed the conversation that had gone by, noting that Changmin could be alluding to a romance or at least a would be romance.

If he thought about it however, it would seem as if Changmin had an idea who the person was. Is that why he was teasing him about it? Minho figured however, that if Changmin knew who it was then there was a high possibility he also knew who it was. It could more than likely be an acquaintance from within their circle. It is not as if they had the opportunity to meet a lot of people as it was. He wondered....was it Seohyun?.....something wasn’t right there though.

“But Seohyun doesn’t have almond shaped eyes” Minho spoke out loud, his thoughts leaving his mouth before he could stop it, carefully considering it all, his mind supplying him a picture of the fellow maknae, trying to envision her eyes and determine if they were the same almond shaped eyes that Changmin thought haunted Kyuhyun.

In his mind and in his memory however he could see no resemblance, nothing to indicate that it was her eyes. As far as he remembered they weren’t even close to almond shaped, wondering what he was missing. If it wasn’t Seohyun then who was it? He was caught in thought trying to figure out who it could be, verbally ruling out the slightly older girl, wondering who the next candidate could have been when he heard Changmin stifle a laugh at his word vomit, turning to him, to see the older man turning red from the effort to not laugh out loud, Minho thinking he was laughing at him for his misstep, missing Kyuhyun’s expression entirely.

“Why are you laughing Hyung? Kyuhyun hyung is right. You just miss Yunho hyung. You complain even more when you miss him” Minho countered the laugh, with a chuckle of his own , turning firmly to look at Changmin with that proud smile, pleased that he could join in the teasing and conceivably hold his own, that competitive streak making itself known even in such a circumstances , feeling rather proud that he was able to seemingly stomp Changmin.

The older man looking at him with his mouth agape, Kyuhyun now laughing somewhere in the background, Minho pleased and terrified at the same time. Changmin had the ability to slaughter him obviously, but he was really banking on his comment throwing Changmin off, the mention of Yunho and his affection for the older man sometimes having that ability. Minho didn’t see why it was so hard for him to admit that he missed Yunho. He could easily admit that he missed Onew sometimes and when the older man was sick he had genuinely been concerned about him. What was so hard for him to admit that he missed his leader? There was no shame in it as far as Minho was concerned. He did feel as if he were missing something there as well, something that only Changmin and Kyuhyun seemed to share, but he was not going to be presumptuous and think he knew what they were talking about. Instead he was going to take his small victory and stay quiet, the question of Kyuhyun’s crush temporary or permanently forgotten.

“That is not true! I complain all the time!” Changmin asserted as his form of defence, face pulling into an offended stance, bordering on a sneer really, but to the others at the table it just came off as childish and pitiful, his denial much too over the top to be taken seriously.

Why he saw the need to react that way they would never understand, Kyuhyun and Minho erupting into peals of laughter, Kyuhyun nearly choking on the wine he had sipped before, Minho laughing so hard that he started to cough, Kyuhyun reaching a hand out to pat him on the back to ease the choking sensation. Changmin in the meantime was glaring at them both, looking rather displeased but more nervous about making his point.

Really! He couldn’t see why they thought he missed Yunho.

The man was a pain most of the time. He was glad to be away from him. They spent nearly 20hrs a day together normally. He was glad that he didn’t have to deal with his clingy ways, but he may be willing to admit that he sometimes wondered about his wellbeing, or if he ate or if he was tired or if he was in pain or if he was nervous or if he missed being home or if……well he just thought about him sometimes…..at random times during the day and he or may not wonder if Yunho was thinking about him too, but all in all that was normal if you spent such a long time with some. He didn’t think that constituted missing him or anything like that that. Really! He did not miss him!

“So you miss him all the time then?” Kyuhyun threw out in between his laughter, the words coming out breathy and unformed but he just couldn’t stop laughing to get them out properly, his comment having the desired effect though, Minho back to choking on his laughter, hand slapping against the table in his glee, Changmin scoffing at him painfully, Kyuhyun continuing to laugh.

 Changmin’s face was just too funny and it was good for the bastard to suffer a little. He had taken joy in messing with Kyuhyun earlier and it was time now for him to be the one annoyed, finding glee from the fact that Changmin looked slightly murderous, not laughing in the slightest, shaking his head in denial as a reflex action. Kyuhyun felt gleeful or he did until Changmin smiled. It was the sort that spoke of vengeance and sure torture.

Kyuhyun’s laugher dying slowly as Changmin pulled his face into a smirk.

“Do you really want to go there Kyuhyunnie? I am sure you don’t want to talk about small hands” Changmin challenged with an evil smirk, eyes shining in that annoying way, Kyuhyun’s last chuckle caught dead in his throat, Changmin nodding his head in that way that made Kyuhyun want to drown him in a shallow pool brutally, Changmin eyeing him in challenge, that smirk refusing to fall away, feeling much too pleased with himself in that moment, making a show of sipping his glass of wine, Kyuhyun coughing as he tried to deal with the new situation, aware that he was in a tough place now.

Seriously? How could Kyuhyun think it was a good idea to mess with him? He obviously had ammunition to last him a lifetime and he didn’t even have to do anything too extreme. He was still very conscious of Minho being there and whilst he was keen on taking an advantage he was very much aware that it was a protected secret and he was in no way going to jeopardize it.  He was confident however that the teasing was vague enough that Minho would not be able to conceive it. To be fair it was not something that anyone would just think about. It was quite shocking. Sometimes even he couldn’t believe it but Kyuhyun’s happiness was all the proof he needed. Plus Kyuhyun’s stuttering is hilarious.

“Okay…now I really am confused” Minho informed looking form one to the other, his expression pulled and confused, slightly downturn. That last exchange made it quite clear to him that he was indeed left out of the secret. He thought they were on the same page, but that comment about small hands really threw him.

 Why would Kyuhyun not want to take about small hands? They were just hands really, but from the way Kyuhyun reacted they seemed to have significant meaning, his Hyung’s expression falling rather quickly, looking jumpy and nervous, something that he had never associated with Kyuhyun, the older man always calm and suave and rarely missing a step, now seemingly worried. Really what was so special about hands? They were being weird he decided, looking at two, who were coincidentally looking at each other instead, Kyuhyun’s expression stern, Changmin looking slightly apologetic , nodding his head at him.

“Don’t worry about it Minho ah. Just teasing the birthday boy” Changmin explained with a warm smile, though Minho knew instantly that it was a dismissal, Kyuhyun not looking afraid but stern, pulling his face into a forced smile and a nod, clearly endorsing Changmin’s statement, both now looking at each other and him with a blank expression, Minho not satisfied but if they both were in agreement there would be nothing he can get out from either, both united on that front.

He nodded along in understanding, though he frowned unable to dispel the nagging feeling that they were deliberately excluding him. It seems Changmin understood his feeling, grabbing the bottle a little distance away, pulling it towards him and emptying a good helping into his nearly empty scotch glass, smiling at him genuinely, toothy and bright, though his eyes were still a little dim, turning towards Kyuhyun to do the same this time reaching for the bottle of red wine, the other man permitting the refill and gave his gratitude in the form of a smile, though his was more forced still, Changmin pulling his hand with his free hand, a tug he realized it, Kyuhyun looking up to meet their eyes, Minho looking on as well, smiling more genuinely this time, lifting his glass and taking generous sips, looking a lot more relaxed, Changmin finally doing the same, clearing his throat.

“So….did you met anyone hot in China?” Changmin asked casually, trying to change the line of conversation into something a lot more favourable. Kyuhyun seemed genuinely upset when Minho asked that question and he was apologetic.

He knew even if he was not told that whatever Kyuhyun had with Yesung was very special to him and if that was so , that meant automatically that he would be very protective of it. Changmin really didn’t mean for it to get too far and honestly didn’t think it was much of an issue. He could understand Kyuhyun’s uneasiness though and was automatically resolved to fix it as best as he could. Aside from Kyuhyun’s ill temper and revenge thirsty mind, he really just did not want him to be hurt or to hurt is very precious relationship. He was positive a change in topic was required, Minho clearly aware that it was not as simple as it seemed and it was time to deflect and find a new topic to discuss. It was a frivolous choice but the least they could do was amuse themselves, Minho already perking up.

“Come on…tell us! I am sure you met lots of hot girls” Minho added, pulling himself closer to the table to look at Kyuhyun eagerly, rather interested in the new topic, his curiosity momentarily forgotten and left to the wayside, rather choosing to focus on the prospects of a good story and maybe a nice description of a plunging neckline. Seriously, at his age and his hormone level, just the chatter was more interesting than figuring out who Kyuhyun probably liked. He didn’t even care about Changmin laughing at his eagerness, just encouraging Kyuhyun to speak.

“The usual…some of them were gorgeous actually. There was this host though. Her body was smoking hot-“ Kyuhyun continuing to explain the particulars, that mainly involved a very well shaped , nearly heart shaped according to him, a perfect ‘S’ line and just the right amount of curves that a man could want, long legs that left a nice path and thighs plumb enough to create some interest, the best part being her generous cup size and willingness to flaunt it, describing in detail to a captive audience, finally winding down-

 “Not my type though. Way too eager” Kyuhyun concluding his story, shaking his head at the memories of the woman pressing herself against him, making him rather uncomfortable, her red dress though y as hell, somehow grating on his nerves as he only reminded him of someone bored at home that loved red things, her smile much too bright and forthright, much preferring the wonders of shyness and blushing cheeks and it was just very clear to him that no one would come close to him.

He always knew that of course, but it was both terrifying and encouraging when he realized it, smiling politely at the woman but calmly turning down her offer of coffee...really coffee? He really missed the scent of coffee, that feeling of loss settling in his stomach. He thought he was clear on his unwillingness but she thought it was better to persist, making some inappropriate comments towards him. Kyuhyun however was precluded from reacting when Ryeowook popped up from nowhere and glared the fires of hell at her, dragging him away, ranting under his breath about the audacity of some people and some other things that Kyuhyun better not repeat, the eternal maknae a lot more upset than he was, keeping Kyuhyun close until they were allowed to leave the venue, Kyuhyun more than happy to stay under his care. With that being said though, she still had a rocking body and he thought they would be interested in knowing.

“Once she didn’t have a ‘special voice’, she would never do” Changmin quipped with a laugh, back to teasing but in a manner that even Kyuhyun laughed, just very much aware as to the accuracy of his friend’s words.

Once she wasn’t Yesung didn’t matter what she did or said or how she looked, she would never be the one he wanted. That was the power the older man had over him and the state he allowed himself to exist. He was sure that even if she was perfect he would find some reason to be uninterested…maybe her nails would be too long and sleek, not jagged and tiny like him or her hair not the right shade of black or maybe her eyes weren’t bright enough or not almond shaped or have disappear like his did when he laughed.

He knew what it meant of course and couldn’t say he was saddened by it, not even bothering to deny it, as that would be like denying his name or his skill. It was just too truthful to be denied, Changmin laughing amiably and Minho chuckling lightly even if he clearly did not see what was so funny. Kyuhyun not bothering to get upset, aware that the comment was made in jest and not meant to cause any harm, Changmin laughing along nicely.

“She can’t be yours either…not if she actually talks to you” Kyuhyun teased, watching the pleased smile fall away, Changmin’s chuckles pulling down, Kyuhyun instead laughing along, Minho up to speed with this little dig, laughing his head off at the slight dangerous tease, Changmin glaring but its good naturedly.

 They all knew about that little secret that Changmin thought he kept so well, one late night and 6 bottles of wine letting that cat out the bag and Changmin had not been able to live it down since, both and even Jonghyun when he is with them, teasing at whatever opportunity they got, Changmin glaring at them but it is not scary, both of them still laughing in glee. Changmin scoffing, as he reached outwards to smack Minho behind the head to make him stop laughing at him, beyond annoyed that he had made that embarrassing admission.

“Guess I am better than both of you then. Met this girl recently and even got a number. You guys-“ Minho continued to recount the tale of the girl that he had met recently, informing of his grand luck compared to his hyungdeul.

Both Changmin and Kyuhyun satisfied to stop teasing each other and listen to Minho recount the tale of how he had met ‘this girl’ recently that he was acquainted with, refusing to say who she was no matter how much they prodded him, simply saying that it was a secret, and informing that she had the best body ever and they would be envious of his good fortune, going on to describe some of her better features and having great pride, boasting that he had been able to secure a phone number and a first date if he was ever able to get away from his schedules to actually go on it, refusing to acknowledge some of Changmin’s less than constructive advice on escaping from his manager and Kyuhyun’s rather cheap suggestion of skipping the date and going for the good stuff. Minho deciding that he rather not have that sweetness tainted by those two erts he instead recounted the week he had in terms of the hot bodies that he had observed, the three men a lot more comfortable as the alcohol warmed their blood and softened the inhibitions, simply enjoying the drink and the company, and sometimes some of Changmin interesting stories, Kyuhyun’s mood improving significantly.

This nice atmosphere continued for a while, drinking wine and light teasing, Minho regaling them with stories of his greatness and how he is without a doubt the most athletic idol in existence, his stories of conquest in fact quite amusing, Kyuhyun and Changmin rather pleased to listen to them as they sipped at their wine, snacking on a small appetizer that the lounge had provided. Kyuhyun felt a lot more perky, his sulkiness and displeasure being sent away as he was entertained by his friends, rolling his eyes when Changmin yet again complained about Yunho , he and Minho laughing at him but he did not seem to notice, Kyuhyun actually hoping that he realized it himself, though he didn’t, Kyuhyun thankfully entertained.

He was however pulled from his easier laughter by the ringing in his pocket, feeling the vibrations against his leg, the phone blaring lowly a nice cut of Super Junior KRY’s latest single, suspiciously being a cut of mainly Yesung, but if the other two noticed they did not comment on it and as far as he could tell they didn’t, Kyuhyun releasing the wine glass to retrieve the object. With some skill he pulled the small thing out of his pocket, not even bothering to look at the home screen, instead straight to his ear, only ringing numerous times.

“Happy Birthday Brat!” a loud excited voice booming into his eardrums, not even a hello being uttered after his half way greeting when he answered the phone, his mind trying to figure out what was happening as he cleared his thoughts, aware that someone had just said Happy Birthday to him, the attachment of ‘brat’ said in such an affectionate matter however , that it was the smoking gun for Kyuhyun, his mind slowly piecing it all together for him to understand why someone would be so excited to say something like that, waiting for his synapses to finally be on point.

He does get there though in a couple of seconds, the duration feeling much longer to him as he tried to regain some sense. He finally concluded that it was Yesung on the phone greeting him happy birthday. He could kick himself for not recognizing it sooner, the excitement and happiness had to be him…right?

“Hyung?” Kyuhyun questioned into the phone just to be sure. His mind was a little muddle and whilst he thought it was Yesung, the initial words were uttered when he was less than focused and he did not want to be left to be a fool and assume that it was Yesung just like that. He was pretty sure it was him though, even if he was wary of it just being wishful thinking on his part. It was not that they were apart that much either ,just that he would love to hear his voice and it was a little too good for him to comprehend in that moment.

“Who else would call a little demon like you now?” Yesung asked and Kyuhyun thinks he is teasing or he supposed that he would be, his tone not clear enough through the phone to make out the words intention, but the cute little giggle at the end of the comment does make it easier for Kyuhyun to understand that he was in fact teasing him.

Kyuhyun’s heart by that time thumping in happiness, thrilled that they got to him, to know that he was remembered by Yesung. His beloved’s voice making him feel little flutters and a lot of happiness. He was sort a embarrassed by the obvious happiness at just hearing his voice, but as to be expected, the happiness also made him less willing to care about reactions and so on, his face turning a little red and that feeling of lightness settling in the pits of his stomach making a smile bloom on his lips and for his cheek to appear red in the moment

“Hyung I-“ Kyuhyun began to speak, wanting to say thank you, to ask him what he was doing? Where he was? Did he want to meet him? So many things that Kyuhyun wanted the answer to, wanted him to tell him, yet the older man seemed to be unwilling to cooperate, Kyuhyun forgetting the other people sitting near him, Minho still chattering softly, not paying attention to the conversation happening on the phone, just more quiet as to allow him to hear above the noise, Changmin however looking on intently, a smile breaking happily when he saw the dusting of red on Kyuhyun’s cheek, aware automatically as to who it was, Kyuhyun looking a little flustered when his sentence was cut off, Changmin wondering if it was still possible for him to tease a bit.

“I heard that you were out with Changmin ah and Minho-yah. Don’t stay out to late and don’t drink too much. Get home safely. Don’t forget to put on your coat and stuff. It’s cold outside. Happy Birthday again Kyu ah” Yesung greeted in a bit of a rush, getting straight to the point as he listed the things that Kyuhyun was supposed to do, Kyuhyun hearing the worry in his voice about all the things that was mentioned , Kyuhyun smiling as he listened to his hyung worry about it, not even annoyed that he was cut off anymore, the happiness pulsing in his pits, feeling light and thrilled, wondering when the older man would realize that he was not a baby, all of 26 years old now.

He was more than capable of taking care of himself but he still couldn’t see a time when he would love Yesung's pampering any less, subconsciously nodding along to the instructions as he does in Yesung's presence, smiling stupidly as Yesung reminded him about his coat, his heart leaping when he said Happy Birthday to him, Kyuhyun having a sneaking suspicion.

“Hyung-” Kyuhyun began but was cut off once again by an impatient voice, Kyuhyun forced to stop half way in his speech once again, Yesung still doing things to annoy him it would seem, yet somehow not feeling very much annoyed until he heard the next words.

“Stay safe. Bye” Yesung greeting him in a whirlwind, not waiting for him to finish sentences and all of that, speaking into the phone with that deep husky voice of his and with the alcohol warming Kyuhyun’s body all he could think about was the little shivers along his skin at his deep voice, pulled from his happiness daze when he realized that Yesung was disconnecting, trying to stop him and failing, the dial tone in his ear some enough, Kyuhyun scoffing.

“Hyung? Are you there?...Idiot!” Kyuhyun spoke into the phone. He was annoyed. He didn’t get to say goodbye. This idiot really! Why didn’t he even wait for him to say goodbye at least? Kyuhyun pulled the phone from his ear to glare at it as a scapegoat for his idiot hyung that couldn’t realize that Kyuhyun would want to speak to him some more? He really wondered what he would do with the fool, back to smiling like a clown when he looked at the home screen and realized that it was only two minutes after twelve o’ clock on the third of February.

Yesung had been the first one to call him again. Did he wait till the first at midnight? Kyuhyun’s face breaking into splitting grin as he regarded the thought behind that. Yesung had just called him on his birthday at midnight as it had always been. Kyuhyun was very happy in that moment, especially with the feelings that went with it so deep within him. The more he stared at the phone the happier he had become, Kyuhyun’s smile widening in joy, finally being able to hear from him in what felt like a lifetime,  being greeted first as to be expected. He was happy all of a sudden.

“ Well aren’t you happy now ?If you don’t stop your jaw will hurt” Changmin advised as he looked at his friend, noting that the now older man looked quite thrilled, Changmin automatically assuming that it was Yesung that called him.

It was more than likely only possible to get such a smile and that stupid grin and redness from Yesung, Kyuhyun still smiling at the phone like an idiot, mumbling something about idiots and being called first. It was rather disconcerting to see him like that, honestly not accustomed to Kyuhyun being so blushy. Thankfully Minho didn’t seem to notice the difference exactly, or atleast he didn’t seem to be aware of just how foolish their friend had gotten after his phone call. Kyuhyun though finally looked at him, this time with happy eyes that he couldn’t hide and a grin that would split his face, visibly trying to get rid of it, so far having limited success, pulling it down to a wide smile, a glare in Changmin’s direction for disturbing his happiness.

“If you don’t stay quiet yours will too…or maybe you prefer if I called Yunho and told him about that-“ Kyuhyun began in a blistering good mood, Yesung's phone call making his heart light as well as the sheer fact that it was indeed his birthday.

The day naturally special but always more so for him when he remembers the days when everyone thought he wouldn’t be able to celebrate another, always grateful for his second chance at life, plus after Yesung's phone call he was floating on the clouds. He supposed he shouldn’t have physically threatened Changmin, considering they both knew that he was not the physical threatening sort or atleast he was not the sort to actually go about it in any real or clear way. He did think he could punch him in the face but that was unlikely….there was always the greater possibility that he would just call Yunho and tell him something that Changmin wanted to say buried in the earth for an eternity, Kyuhyun watching as Changmin panicked, grinning when he interrupted him, throwing a glance to Minho who was just laughing at the short exchange and now sipping at his scotch. It was clear he did not want it even said out loud, Kyuhyun thrilled with his suffering.

He knew…he was the best friend anyone could have or ever ask for.

“I hate you” Changmin lamented with a shake of his head and a humourless chuckle when Kyuhyun just laughed at his admission. He swore he hated Kyuhyun. The bastard was freaking evil. How could he even threaten to do that? Yunho would kill him and then he would have to be nice to him and do aegyo and arrgghhhh!!! He really needed to get nicer friends he decided.

“It would be kinda awkward if you liked me to be honest” Kyuhyun added just to be a brat, finding himself rather amused at the proceedings thus far, his innuendo seemingly hilarious judging by Minho’s loud laugh and excitement and Changmin’s bitter acknowledged that he was indeed witty, the other man scowling at him from the other side of the table as he laughed it all off, feeling considerably better since the evening began.  He was so on point that he intercepted Changmin before he could make a response.

“Or maybe I should call someone else…though she might not like that” Kyuhyun teased, this time Changmin glaring at him outright, though he sank back into his chair, the fighting spirit leaving him all of a sudden. Well this was turning out to be fun, Changmin sulking a bit which made Kyuhyun laugh and Minho pat his back.

“Alright stop sulking. Let’s celebrate my birthday” Kyuhyun informed cheerfully, this time pouring a glass of wine for Changmin, who was perking up now that the conversation was abandoned, getting into the spirit with his now filled cup, Minho thoughtfully pushing the food in his direction, the best way always to make him feel better, Kyuhyun smiling at his friends.

He thereafter had a nice fun teasing evening, the ribbing continuing now and then, proud to say that he only glanced at his phone once or twice in the forty five minutes that he stayed with his friends further. He was hoping the idiot would call him back, wanting to strangle him for not doing it and ending the call abruptly, but still rather thrilled that he had called in the first place, and it was that happiness that kept the flutters in his stomach and made his mood a lot better, he and Changmin deciding that he and Minho had gotten the easy end of the evening, teasing the younger man about everything they could manage, though Changmin was stumped when Minho asked him how he knew what Yunho would eat at every meal, Kyuhyun laughing at his poor friends.

All in all it was a great evening and after two bottles of wine, they had called it a night, Kyuhyun tipsy and slightly buzzed but generally mainly sober, walking to the car, the designated driver they had called, which was in fact the SHINee manager, meeting them at the lounge, Kyuhyun insisting that he be taken home first, feeling tired and the others were more than willing to oblige, especially since it was his birthday.

He was in the parking garage of the Super Junior dorm at around 1am, spilling out the car to happy birthday greetings, thanking them in kind, ignoring Changmin when he mentioned something about ‘Kyuhyun leaving a special hyung alone’, seeing no point in responding, Changmin laughing to himself, Kyuhyun waving at them till they left, then making his way to the elevator.

♥규 성♥