"You look happy."

Luhan nodded to himself and continued to hum, flipping through another horribly written essay. Really, was it too much to ask to just use spellcheck? And it was just so obvious that the kid didn't even read the book. Ernest Hemminkwey. Luhan felt like crying. There was Google, for crying out loud. He quickly scribbled a messy F on the first sheet and moved onto the next paper. 

"So are you going to talk about it?"

Finally acknowledging Baekhyun, Luhan looked up with a sly grin. "Why should I?"

The freshman Biology teacher gave a low whine. "Come on, Luhan! I need drama! I have to go and start an environmental unit next period."

Chanyeol snorted beside the complainer, revising his lesson plan. He kicked Yixing, lounging on the floor beside him, eating a hastily made sandwich. The Chinese teacher glared up at him and looked away when another entered the small room.

Joonmyun took one glance at the look on Luhan's face and groaned. "Please tell me that we aren't doing this?"

"Oh, we most certainly are," Luhan grinned, setting his pen down on the coffee table. "Is the door locked?"

Suho sighed, slumping down into an old computer chair, rolling forward to join the circle. "Of course the door is locked. The door to the staff room is always locked. You've been here for four years, you should know that."

Luhan rolled his eyes at the Vice Principal and leaned forward in his chair, jostling Jongdae, who was grading a note-reading test at his side. He smiled slowly, trying to gather suspense. 

"Oh, out with it already!" Yixing shouted, earning a disapproving look from Joonmyun as he threw his trash backwards into one of the bins.

"Okay, fine." Luhan scowled. "My ship is sailing," he announced, arms spread wide and eyes closed.

Chanyeol pressed his lips into a thin line. Baekhyun blinked. "No way."

"Yes way!" Luhan exclaimed, shooting off the sofa and onto his feet. "You should have seen it today! They were the cutest thing ever!"

"Sekai is not real," Yixing muttered into a protein bar as Joonmyun curled in on himself and started debating the illegality of all of this under his breath.

"Sekai is too real and this is totally legal," Luhan huffed, pacing around the table, hands behind his back.

"So, go on," Baekhyun prompted, trying not to seem as curious as Chanyeol, who was staring at the blond with wide eyes. 

Luhan grinned. He may not be in charge of the school, or his classroom for that matter, but during lunch break in the staff room, he called the shots. Even Joonmyun was silent, eyes on the Literature teacher, albeit slightly fearful. This was the way it had been for a year, ever since Baekhyun had admitted to seating those two kids together to spark a relationship between the two. And then Luhan had done the same in his class. He and Baekhyun were undoubtedly the most eager members of the staff in the pairings of students and gossiping in the staff room, and between the two of them, had scared off almost every other teacher in the school. Those that remained dutifully attended the sporadic lunch meetings, eager for gossip and arguments, even if they were good at not showing it. For example, Joonmyun.

"I just can't see Jongin with Sehun," the Vice Principal admitted, pursing his lips. 

"That's because you haven't seen them," Luhan argued. "I made a test today and they cheated. It was the cutest thing ever. They've made up little signs for A, B, C, and D. They thought they were being secretive. It was adorable."

"Sehun dropped his pencil once, in class," Baekhyun admitted, the story bursting from him. "Jongin walked all the way across the class to pick it up and give it back to him. I swear Sehun even blushed."

Luhan made a strangled noise and fell onto the sofa. "My OTP."

Yixing rolled his eyes. "Still not real."

Luhan glared at the teacher and flopped onto Jongdae's lap. "Why are you destroying my ship?"

"Actually," Jongdae began with a smile, setting his graded papers down on the wooden table. "I think I've begun to ship Kaisoo."

Luhan was up like a shot. "What. What the hell is that? Who the hell is that?"

"I've got this charming kid in my last class, sings like an angel. Really quiet. Do Kyungsoo."

Baekhyun gasped. "I have him, too! He's the best student ever." 

Luhan wasn't convinced.

"Anyways, I put Kai-Jongin, whatever the hell you call him, in the seat beside him, hoping the kid could calm that delinquent down. He broke one of my guitars last week."

Chanyeol emitted a devastated gasp.

"Well, he really likes the kid. They share practically everything now. If you saw them on the street, you'd think they were together."

Luhan gaped. "What? No! That's bull!"

"You know, Sehun and Jongin could be, dare I say it," Yixing paused with a overdramtic gasp, "just friends."

"Bull!" Luhan cried, feeling like he wanted to throw something. "Wait a minute. Was it you that left that hate mail in my pigeon hole?"

"I have no idea what you're talking about." Yixing examined his nails. 

"You're going to-"

"Actually that was me." Jongdae jumped in, hand raised. "I don't think you understand how much I ship Kaisoo. They're my OTP. Sehun can go get transferred for all I care."

Baekhyun and Luhan shared a collective gasp.

"Well, I mean.... remember last year?" Chanyeol began slowly. "That one kid? Taemin?"

"But he graduated last year?" Joonmyun frowned, not sure where this was going. 

"But they were attached at the hip while he was here." Chanyeol lowered his voice,"I saw Taemin on campus last week. He walked Jongin home."

Luhan sank into his seat, wanting to disappear. He felt empty. "Someone. Anyone. New pairing. Please," he begged.

"Well, there's always Baekren?" Baekhyun suggested with a shrug. "Though, they have no drama. About as interesting as a relationship between a married couple. I need drama!" Baekhyun whined once again. Chanyeol gave him a sympathetic pat on the back. 

Luhan whimpered.

The door opened and everyone's head snapped up. A man closed the door and glanced around, he looked quite small and unsure, until he saw Luhan. "Um..."

"I thought you said the door was locked?" Baekhyun spat at Joonmyun.

"I thought it was!" Joonmyun defended.

Luhan stood, trying to seem leader-like. "Yes, and who are you? I don't think I've seen you in any of the halls."

"I'm new. Kim Minseok." He introduced himself quickly, nervously glancing around the room. "You, um, stopped me in the halls last week and told me to meet you in the staff room, today."

Yixing laughed. "Sounds like Luhan."

The blond sent a glare over his shoulder and nodded to the man, stone-faced. "So, what do you have?"

"Sorry?"

"What've you got?" He sighed in exasperation at having to explain himself, almost able to feel the eye-rolling going on behind him. "You know... fanart of students, drabbles... gossip? Anything?"

"I don't have... any of that."

"Then get out."

"Hey," Joonmyun frowned. "Don't be so mean!"

But Minseok stayed where he was and opened his bag, pulling out a small blue folder. "I don't have anything about two students, but I have this." He held out a paper towards Luhan, eyes on the ground as he did so.

Luhan took the paper and gasped. "Is this..." He continued to stare at the paper. "Wait. What do you teach?"

"Studio."

Luhan chuckled. "Figures. This is... wow."

Baekhyun dashed over and Minseok made a distressed noise. "Let me see!" He stared at the picture, jaw dropping. "I've seen that kid outside Kris's office. And is that-is that Kris?"

Chanyeol had his arms around the art teacher while Baekhyun and Luhan were still gaping at the picture. "I'm not the only one!" He cried happily.

The door was flung open again. Everyone sent a nasty look to Joonmyun, who held his hands high in surrender.

"Dammit, Luhan, what the hell is this? I told you to stop your stupid gossip sessions. Lunch is half over and I'm trying to reprimand a student. Do you think you could just work silently or something? I swear you all are children."

Luhan wasn't deterred by Kris's rant. "You're reprimanding a student?" Excitedly, he pushed past Kris, and Minseok made a mad grab for the paper, holding the picture to his chest and offering a nervous smile before taking off after Luhan. The rest of the room raced after the blond, down the hall and toward the offices.

Luhan skidded to a stop in a large room, out of breath. A small junior was seated in front of the desk, and looked at Luhan curiously. 

Luhan kneeled beside the kid. "Hey, I teach Literarture and you're Huang Zitao. So, would you mind telling me exactly what you and Kris talk about here in his office?"

"Oh my god, Luhan, you can't just ask that," Joonmyun groaned, slamming his hand into his forehead.

Luhan grinned and continued. "I mean, you're in here more than once a week. There has to be a reason."

Kris pushed past the gathering and glared at Luhan. "Get out."

Luhan smirked at the blushing high schooler. "Sure, Kris. I have everything I need." He met the kid's eyes. "Thanks."

"Out."

Luhan waved at the kid and winked at Kris before walking out of the office, blinking when the door was slammed in his face. "Rude."

Baekhyun grinned, almost jumping up and down. "New OTP?"

Luhan nodded. "New OTP." He searched for the art teacher and laid a hand on his shoulder. "Minseok."

"... yes?"

"Welcome to the club. We meet on Wednesdays."