Confession
Give Her Tulips and Your Heart
I could see him walking towards my direction. He had a bit of a curl across his pinkish lips, his brown hair lightly bouncing making him look neat and smart especially with those not-so-nerdy glasses of his but still looking masculine and sharp.
"Hey Tia. Study buddies tomorrow, okay? Math?" He pinched my arm and wiggled it.
"AWWWWW! Oh yeah! I have the copy of those exercises. And please, why do you always pinch my arm?" I tried to sound annoyed with his habit of his but I kind of like it.
"It's soft! Don't you like it? Somebody likes the cuddliness of your arm? Besides, you have to bear this until tomorrow. I'll be teaching you." Yoseob smugged. I could feel my cheeks burning.
How I wish YOU like me. Not my arm.
"Whatever. If you weren't the best in our class, I wouldn't ask you to teach me." I rolled my eyes.
He held my arm and dragges me slowly towards him. His face was just inches from mine.
"See you tomorrow." He whispered in my ear. He patted my head, pinched my arm and left.
"Tia, I think Yoseob is really into you. You are not that close but both of like annoying each other. He doesn't do that to girls. He's too wiity for girls!" Jam talked directly to my ear, making me shake up a bit.
"WHAT? GOSH JAM! Why do you always do that? As if you're some creepy lady lurking here! Like me? No, okay? I am just a friggin' charity case of Mathematics. That's why he's teaching me." I exclaimed.
"Tia, stop trying to be a master of defense mechanism because I can read you well. I am your bestfriend and your bestfriend says and reads that you are excited and psyched for tomorrow. This is your chance, sweetie. Now or never. Don't ruin it." She whispered.
I turned around slowly, having that smile I've been trying to hide and hugged her tight.
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My heart was thumping fast as I walk going to the library. My mind was so preoccupied with all the possibilties of our review.
Will he stare at me for seconds? Or maybe, our hands might touch together accidentally. Ugh Tia!
"Reality check, Tia." I said to myself making the girl beside me look as if I was a weirdo having too much intrapersonal communication.
I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket. It was Yoseob calling. I could feel my cheeks burn again. I cleared up my voice before I answered, just to be sure that I don't sound too excited.
"Where are you?" His voice sounds as if he's excited.
"Uhh, going to the library." I mumbled.
"I'm already here at the discussion room. Why are you late?" His voice suddenly became rough.
"Late? Dude, you asked me to be there at 11! It's only 10:20!" I exclaimed.
"Woops! My watch is early by 30 minutes. Sorry, I forgot. But come quickly!" He said.
"Fine! I'm running! Happy?" I was really running.
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As I entered the library, I brushed my hair through my fingers, sprayed some perfume on my neck, wiped my face to look fresh and fixed my clothes.
I was going over rooms, trying to find Yoseob. He was at the last room. I saw him holding our thick book with his legs crossed and his lips puckered. I took a deep breath before going in.
"Here we go." I said to myself.
"There you are. Sorry I nagged on the phone." He calmly said.
"Yeah. Cool." I replied.
His voice became calm and sweet all of a sudden. When he says sorry to other people, it seems that he doesn't really mean it. I kind of like him speaking like that. Something new to my ears
He started teached me probability to permutations which was kinda easy. I can't keep my eyes glued all the time on what he is teaching since I'm distracted with the fact that our faces are just inches apart and our hands almost touching each other.
"So for you to find this, you have to..." I watch him as he was pressing his calculator with his right hand. He accidentally touched my hand with his left, trying to point out the forumula to me.
"Ohh.. that's it.. yeah.. that." I mumbled. I could feel my cheeks heat up. Nobody was speaking. There was just dead air for seconds.
"Ah! D-don't block the page with your hands!" He shouted and stuttered.
"Oh. I'm sorry. I thought you were the king of Math that's why my hand was there." I didn't really meant to be sarcastic. I just want to break the awkward atmosphere between us. Luckily, that saved me.
We decided to take a short break but I continued answering the exercises on the paper. He was tapping to the table to the beat of Maroon 5's She Will Be Loved. I never knew he had a smooth voice when he sings.
"Hey Tia." Yoseob said. I looked at him straight to his brown eyes.
"When was the last time that a guy said he has feelings for you?" His voice was so soft.
"Well, I can't remember." I paused for a while, trying to remember.
"Nah, I can't really remember. Why ask something that doesn't really interest you?" I bobbled my head.
"Is it? There's this girl that I like. No, not like. I love for a very long time already." My heart dropped and my body shuddered.
"I don't know why I love her. Maybe because she's different. She's the type of girl that I would want to go skydiving with and won't go nuts of falling." He continued.
"But I might move to Holland after this semester." My body felt more heavy.
"So, I want to tell her that I've been in love with her for a long time before I leave. How do you think should I confess to her?"
"Be in a nice black suit that would fit perfect for you, bring a bouquet of tulips since you're going to Holland where tulips are abundant and when she sees tulips, she will think of you and wear sneakers so that you won't look too formal when you confess it." My voice was stern. I guess I'm not really a master of defense mechanism.
"You think she will like it?" His face was so close to mine. Is this guy trying to meddle with me? I'm getting confused.
"I reckon she will." I sighed. He was smiling at me. I was a bit annoyed seeing him smile like that.
"We'll be late for class." My eyes popped and checked my watch. I don't like being late for class.
"Gah! I'm late!" I dumped my things as if it was trash being dumped in the garbage bin.
"You are really something." He was just staring in amusement with his arms crossed.
"I am. Thanks Seob. Let's go." I smiled reluctantly.
Is it? There's this girl that I like. No, not like. I love for a long time already.
I could feel tears building up in my eyes. I looked up the sky, trying to pull back the tears. I looked down and I just can't help but cry.
My phone vibrated. It was a text message from Yoseob.
Thanks for the tip. I'll do it. Go first in class. I have to buy everything that I need for my confession. Take care, friend.
As I read it, I was staring blankly at the word, FRIEND.
"Yeah. I said that because I want to be a friend. Because I love you." I said to myself.
I replied back.
Anytime :)
Jam was running at the corridor. She was running towards me.
"So, how was it?" She looked so excited, knowing me and Yoseob had a study buddy session.
"It was fine." I said.
Jam, you didn't catch me pretending this time.
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