“There’s a t-thousand different ways I p-pictured my first meeting with her Donghae…”

Donghae smiled and put his arm around his drunk friend, “Mhm…” he murmured understandingly.

“But she didn’t even recognize me…not even a little,” Siwon reached for the bottle of bourbon they’d bought to share at their private table, “Can you b-believe that?”

Eunhyuk subtly crossed his hands at the wrist and Donghae took the hint.

“Er…maybe you should slow down with the drinks there…” Donghae suggested pushing the bottle further down the table where Siwon couldn’t reach.

“Why? This bottle…this bottle is the only thing that’ll ever love me…” he made a half-hearted attempt to reach for the bottle again.

Eunhyuk rolled his eyes and Donghae had to fight to keep the chuckle that rose in his throat from escaping. Where others could be divided into happy or angry drunks only Siwon could be described as a dramatic one.

It was 3am and the girls they’d come with had left nearly an hour earlier, leaving just the three musketeers. Siwon sat slumped over on the table, drunk but still looking like he’d stepped out of a GQ pictorial, Eunhyuk who wasn’t much of a drinker and was therefore fully awake and aware sat beside him and Donghae who though slightly tipsy was alert and wondering what had got into their usually calm and collected friend.

They’d been at their usual private room at QVo having fun drinking and taking turns singing karaoke. One of Eunhyuk’s model friends had brought along a few of her friends and things had been going really well until Siwon had started chugging drinks down left and right.

His spiral into the phantom that now sat with them had started with him getting a little friskier than usual with one of the girls, who had in turn received the attention with a little bit too much enthusiasm. They’d all watched Siwon and the girl’s exchange with amusement, with her pretending to dislike his advances and him trying to get her to give in to him.

“But doesn’t he have a girlfriend?” one of the other girls had whispered.

“Really? Oh she’d be pretty mad if she saw him acting like that,” her friend replied.

Those two innocent sentences had seemed to set something off in Siwon who had actually heard the quiet exchange.

“She’d be mad right?” he’d asked looking directly at the girls.

They’d nodded feigning disapproving expressions.

“Hwaseong?” Eunhyuk had laughed, “I doubt it.”

“But she doesn’t even remember me…” Siwon continued.

Donghae who'd been puzzle by the strange statement had asked, “Doesn’t remember?”

“Mm…not one bit...”

At this point it had become clear that Siwon was not talking about Hwaseong and everyone’s attention was piqued. Eunhyuk sensing that Siwon might reveal something he really shouldn’t in front of the models who, though pleasant company weren’t really people he could say he trusted, decided to send them off home first.

It took some doing but the girls eventually left. In the end though, Siwon hadn’t really revealed anything, he’d spent the following hour drinking and about how some as yet unnamed girl hadn’t remembered him.

“Who is this girl?” Eunhyuk asked for the umpteenth time but not really expecting an answer.

Surprisingly though, Siwon did answer after a momentary pose, his words surprisingly unslurred as he spoke the name, “Kim…Kim Hyoyeon…”

Donghae’s eyebrows rose curiously, “Kim Hyoyeon?”

“Idol? Model? Actress?” Eunhyuk probed.

Those were the three main categories of women in their lives at the moment. Idols, models and actresses. Super Junior had become a celebrity only dating zone. Entanglements with their own kind were easier to maintain and cover up. And even if said entanglements were discovered, in this new world of Korean entertainment culture, scandals with other celebrities were more often than not a good way to boost interest and get exposure.

“…she’s just good with contracts,” Siwon replied grabbing an apple slice from the fruit platter.

“Huh?” both Eunhyuk and Donghae exclaimed.

They fell silent waiting for Siwon’s reply.

“You know…there’s a thousand ways-” Siwon began.

“You pictured your first meeting….we know!” they replied in unison.

A half hour later the two half carried half walked Siwon into the apartment they shared and plopped him down on the bed in the guest bedroom.

“Whose idea was it to invite him?” Donghae asked stretching to loosen his sore back.

The night had been fun in its own way but he wished they hadn’t sent the girls away. It was December after all, the nights got awfully chilly.

Eunhyuk laughed, “I believe that was your idea.”

***

Two interviews, a photo shoot and lunch with Hwaseong at a paparazzi frequented bistro in Cheongdam-dong later and Siwon was ready to call it a day despite it only being half past two in the afternoon. His hangover from the previous night had only abated once he’d finally got some food in him but Hwaseong’s endless chatter had brought on another migraine.

He felt bad for his distinct lack of interest in any of the conversation topics she brought up but there was only so much he could contribute to a discussion about the advantages of an extra strap on a stiletto heel or whether white really was the new black for 2012.

And then of course there was the fact that Hyoyeon had been running laps through his mind since he’d woken up. He had given up waiting for her call and had instead tried to call her but she seemed to be blocking his number.

Siwon shifted in the car seat and cracked open the window a little to let some fresh air in. Junseo sat beside him, an earphone plugged into one ear, his head bopping slightly to the tune of an up and coming indie band.

They were driving back to SM headquarters for a planning meeting on a fan event to promote his new drama before heading to his next schedule. He knew he should be focusing on his work, reading through the mountain of scripts for prospective new dramas but he couldn’t concentrate.

Not with her on his mind.

Had he really made her that upset? He wondered. Wasn’t it natural that he’d want to talk after the kiss? If she’d take his calls then at least he could apologise to her. For the kiss, for the call for whatever it was that had upset her enough for her to keep avoiding him.

“Junseo…what else do we have lined up today?”

“Well there’s a meeting with Artemis Korea’s marketing department, they want you to endorse a new line of fashion bags for men. That’s at…” Junseo pulled out the tablet PC he used to schedule all of Siwon’s activities and opened up the schedule application, “At 3pm, then after that you’ve got a photo op event, a black tie dinner at the Sheraton…why do you ask?”

Siwon didn’t reply immediately. All he really wanted to do was go home, take a long hot shower and sleep in his own bed. And forget about her, as she so clearly had forgotten about him.

“Cancel the Sheraton thing…” he paused, “And you can attend the Artemis meeting as my proxy. I’m going home.”

Junseo started to complain but Siwon gave him a look that silenced him.

“Alright…do you want to drop me off at SM first then go home or do we just go straight to your apartment.”

“SM first, I’ll make an appearance at the fan event planning meeting at the least before ducking out…”

Junseo nodded and made the necessary changes to the schedule. Siwon was never one to duck out of meetings and other scheduled activities, even when he was working on one hour’s worth of sleep or was sick enough that his own doctors advised him to take a few days off. Whatever it was that was bothering him was probably something big.

They sat in silence for a few minutes before it occurred to him to ask him how his meeting with Hyoyeon had gone.

 “We didn’t meet…”

“What? Why?”

“…I’m not sure, when I called I thanked her for the contract and then…” he recalled how the conversation had ended and fell silent.

“And then?”

“Well I might have said something that upset her…”

Junseo took a calming breath before he spoke, “Upset her how?”

Siwon evaded the question like the pro he was, “It’s nothing to worry about Junseo. Just a misunderstanding.”

Just a misunderstanding? Junseo thought. Where had he heard that before?

Call it a manager’s intuition or years of experience but he’d known there was something going on between the two of them. Siwon’s uncharacteristic insistence on thanking Hyoyeon personally and Hyoyeon’s own aversion to the idea of meeting Siwon had made him suspicious from the get go but it wasn’t his job to be suspicious; it was his job to take care of his charge.

“You made a pass at her?” he asked.

The feigned look of shock that Siwon often employed when he was trying to wiggle out of a tough situation was answer enough.

Siwon shook his head, “It’s not as simple as you think.”

Junseo only nodded, his mouth thinning into a grim line.

“Really, I’m telling you, it was just a misunderstanding. Why are you giving me that look?” Siwon asked.

The line between manager and friend had long since been blurred between him and Junseo and judging by the look Junseo was giving him he knew they were off the clock. Whatever was going to be said from now on was between two friends not boss and subordinate.

“I’m giving you this look because I went out of my way to get Hyoyeon, a dear friend might I add, to agree to take your call. She’s been a fan of yours for years so I was surprised she was so against the idea of just talking to you…what happened? Start from the beginning.”

Siwon averted his gaze but then his ears seemed to perk up and he looked up at Junseo, “She’s a fan?”

Junseo sighed in frustration, “Are you being serious right now?”

Siwon smiled and nodded nonchalantly. His ability to focus only on the positive was usually a good thing, it was the reason he was always so calm and collected even under high stress situations. However, the downside was it allowed him to easily get distracted when the topic of conversation got serious.

His manager ran a hand through his hair, exhaling loudly, “You’re not going to tell me what happened are you?”

“I’ll tell you on one condition…she’s avoiding my calls right now,” Junseo was already shaking his head,  Siwon powered on,“ If you could convince her to take my calls, I’ll clear up this entire misunderstanding and we’ll all be laughing about it over dinner.”

Sensing that Junseo wasn’t taking the bait Siwon decided to sweeten the deal, “I’ll attend all my schedules today, no proxy, no apologising on my behalf…I’ll do it all. Okay? Deal?”

Apparently, the way to Junseo’s heart was through his work.

Dear friend my foot, Siwon thought.

His manager punched in Hyoyeon’s number with practised ease, something Siwon noted with interest. How often did he call her that he knew her number by heart? Junseo put the phone on loud speaker. Two rings, three rings…click.

That was fast, Siwon mused feeling slightly annoyed now that it was obvious she really had blocked his calls specifically.

“Junseo, hi!” her voice came through the line, she sounded happy and excited.

“Hey, how’s your day going?”

Junseo was using his Mr Nice Guy voice, smooth, mellow and charming.

“Pretty good, just got back from a late lunch. How’s your day going?”

“Same old,” Junseo laughed lightly, “Ferrying his lordship back to HQ.”

Siwon scrunched up his nose. ‘His lordship?’ Was that what they called him?

“Ah…I see…”

What was with that half-hearted response? Siwon fought the urge to jump into the conversation.

“Actually I was calling because he told me he was having some trouble getting in touch with you-”

“I’m screening his calls.”

The simple curt response to a question that hadn’t even been asked was the last straw. Siwon grabbed the phone from Junseo and turned the loudspeaker off.

“Why?” he fumed into the mouthpiece, struggling to keep his voice low, “Why are you screening my calls?”

“Mr. Choi Siwon?”

“Or his lordship, whichever you prefer.”

There was a long pause and for a moment he thought she might hang up. He let out a quiet sigh of relief when she spoke at last.

“…you know why.”

“No, I don’t…”

“Those things you were saying…” she faltered.

“What things?”

He knew what she was talking about. But he wanted to hear her say them. He wanted to know that on some level she had acknowledged his words.

“About…wanting to see me…and the kiss and…those things,” she hesitated, “You were making me uncomfortable.”

The words stung but he understood where she was coming from, “Then tell me I am, don’t just hung up and then ignore me. I’ve been out of my mind…” he stopped short.

He cast a glance at Junseo, thinking that his manager might have heard that last confession but was relieved to find that Junseo was sitting with his body slightly turned away, both his earphones plugged into his ears.

“I’m sorry,” she replied, “I didn’t know…how to react or respond so I just chose the easy way out…”

“Trust me it wasn’t easy…”

There was another heavy and drawn out silence.

“Hyoyeon?”

“Why?” she asked.

He had an idea what the vague question meant but he wanted to be sure, “What do you mean?”

He heard her take a steadying breath.

“Why are you being like this…with me, of all people? Why did you kiss me? Why did you say those things on the phone?”

He laughed dryly, “You really don’t remember?”

He didn’t know why it hurt more and more each time he became aware of just how far she’d cast him from her thoughts.

“Remember…?”

“…I guess not.”

“Remember what?” there was a strange urgency to her voice.

“Tonight, my place, seven o’clock. I’ll tell you then.”

He hung up before she could make any excuses or  question his intentions. It was a long way between now and seven. Four hours in which she could decide that he was just trying to trick her into coming over to his apartment, four hours in which she could think up an excuse not to come over.

Four hours in which he could lose his nerve.