Dear Sungmin,
I think you made the right choice ^^ Especially during this time of the year, when it's so easy to get caught up in ourselves, it seems most people forget that there are still lots of others out there who don't even have the barest necessities. I'm sure Santa would be proud. I'll put in a word to him to fill your stocking with something special :P
As my (supposed) departure date approaches and more things are being settled, new issues keep coming up. I've finally told the world last week about my enlistment plans, but thanks to the media, it wasn't as much of a surprise anyway. Seems like I can't even keep my own secrets secret... I guess that's the price of being an idol. But what worries me is that there are still so many errands I still have to complete, and most of them I've never had to think about before--all these technicalities: dealing with the government (different levels, different departments), canceling my dorm (I'm still keeping my key for now though, just in case), different types of medical insurance coverage--each step of the way, I would take action, only to be told later that I had chosen the harder, or the less effective, or even the more troublesome, route. That's why half the time, I'm still convinced that I won't be able to go after all. Sometimes I just want to throw my hands up in the air and ask someone else to take charge and tell me what to do. But this isn't very leader-like, isn't it? (laughs)
Yesterday I was talking on the phone with another idol who was also leaving for the army soon. We weren't close before, but you know how circumstances sometimes bring people together. Kangin overheard the conversation and after I hung up, he commented that I should be careful. "That person...he sounds like he would just use you," he said. "Be careful not to trust him with everything, because that person would probably just desert you the moment you're no longer useful to him." Because he's already been through the army experience, Kangin's like my hyung now. And he's been worrying about me a lot, almost to the point of mothering me. HAHA I think I know how you guys feel now...
But the thing is, I agreed with him. We've been in this business too long to not recognize truth and sincerity when we see it, and vice versa. Yes, I'll continue to keep warm and friendly relations with this other idol, but would we be close? BFFs? Unlikely. But until I go to the army and make new friends, I have no one else to depend on, no one else who understands exactly every little thing I have to deal with right now. While going to the army is a common experience, sadly there are very few people right now who can understand the immediate concerns of an international idol. We're brought together because of our mutual need for the other. Sounds slightly cold, doesn't it? It's at times like this I miss the members the most.
It looks like I'll have to change my cellphone number soon, along with the plan. Gotta stay ahead of the sasaeng fans, and plus, I don't think I'll be able to text and call people quite as freely as I do now once I leave for the army...
Anyway, it looks like you just came back to the dorms. Guess I'll just end this here and talk to you in person. Ahaha
To the future!
Park Jungsu
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