Myungsoo didn’t remember in details the first time it had happened; that memory was a bit hazy around the edges. All he remembered was, he was having a bad day, possibly the worst day of his life—homework was piling up, his band members were nagging him about practice, the Student Council President was pestering him to submit his report and he had thirteen other unfinished tasks. He could hear drum beats in his head and vexation was swelling inside him like an impatient, monstrous hurricane. That was when his eyes fell on the clock and he heard the ticking sound, amplified by many folds, reverberating inside his skull—taunting him, daring him to do something about the maddening mambo of the minute-hand of the clock. He pressed down on his temple, frustration gnawing at his insides with blood-crusted canines. He glared loathingly at the clock and willed it, with all his might, to stop.

And then, it did.

Everyone around him froze, as if they were part of a scene from a movie where the pause button had been hit. They were locked in one giant frame, their eyes alive but still. Myungsoo was shocked into unblinking amazement. But then he blinked, and everyone returned to their normal states, able to move again; unaware that they had been frozen in Time, that moments had passed when they hadn’t breathed. They had no clue that for a fraction of a second, someone else had the control to their lives. It had happened for the briefest period of time and Myungsoo wasn’t even sure it had happened. The clock ticked on happily, hiding any secret it might have witnessed.

The next time he had put his newfound power to test, he had kept his concentration for a longer period. It did put a strain on him, but nothing he couldn’t handle. It took him a few tries to realize that as long as he concentrated, the world was his, Time was his. He controlled Time, Time didn’t control him. Not anymore. The very idea sent tingling shivers up his spine, numbing his other senses; dopamine rushing into every corner of his brain and creating pure ecstasy.

He grew better and better with practice. And he did get a lot of practice. He had been given the key to Time—someone somewhere had deemed him worthy. It would have been an utter waste not to use his powers. He relished in the helplessness of those around him. A point came when he could stop Time for one whole day, or maybe a month, a year—what did it matter? Time held no meaning for him anymore. While the world watched in pause, he would roam around, savoring the freedom—free from space, free from Time, free from all those limitations that the mortals were restrained by. He reveled in this life-altering power.

It was on one such expedition that he had an epiphany—he was Infinite; he wasn’t chained to the mortal world, he wasn’t doomed to be a pathetic participant of this mundane play. He had power beyond the bruising Sun and the mighty Moon; he was the Master of Dawn, Emperor of the Night. And he was indomitable, immortal.

The years dragged on, for normal people of course, but Myungsoo didn’t age a day. Because Time is the Father of Changes, and Myungsoo was beyond Time’s crafty grasp. Everyone around him wondered dolefully while he bathed in the glory of his fortune. But none of them suspected, none of them knew. His older brother, Sunggyu, envied his genes, complaining how he hadn’t been the receiver at the lucky end. Myungsoo laughed when his friends Dongwoo and Woohyun suggested that he might be a vampire. Inwardly, he scorned their words. Vampire from those fantasy novels? Not a chance. He was so much more. So much more.

He could transform every breathing creature around him to stone if he willed it, turning them helpless, mindless; although, on one occasion, he had encountered an anomaly, the former of the two he were to ever meet. While walking through the human statues he had created for the sole purpose of his amusement, Myungsoo had heard a noise which sounded like the clearing of a throat. He had jumped when a voice had spoken behind him.

“So you’re the naughty one, playing with Time.”

Myungsoo was baffled when he saw a tall man saunter towards him. His eyes were alive with mischief.

“It’s a dangerous business, kid,” he said with a smirk.

“W-who—h-how…” Myungsoo’s question got stuck in his throat.

“I am one of Time’s children. You wouldn’t understand. Time doesn’t affect me.”

Myungsoo felt the fear and shock inside him melt to give way for a sudden excitement rising in the pit of his stomach.

“Am I one too?” he asked eagerly.

The man snorted. “Don’t kid yourself. How many ages have you seen?” he asked in a patronizing tone.

“But I can control Time. I can stop it, and start it. If I continue this, I can live forever. I’m Infinite.”

A curious look crept into the man’s eyes. He took a few steps towards Myungsoo.

“You can’t start Time, you can just stop it.”

Myungsoo was confused. “But I do start it. After I’ve stopped Time—”

“You just cease to ‘stop Time’. You don’t start it. When you can’t stop it anymore, it just starts on its own accord. The one who can start Time…” The man broke off, suddenly looking uncomfortable.

“Yes, who is it?” Myungsoo asked curiously. He was a bit disappointed that he didn’t possess the power to start Time but anyone who could had to be special as well. And he wanted to meet that person.

The man had his eyes fixed on the ground and his long fingers on his chin as if he was pondering something deeply.

“Excuse me Mr. …”

“Sungyeol,” the man finally said, raising his head but the pensive look was still in his eyes. “I think I should warn you.”

“Warn me? Why?”

“The one who starts Time is nearby. You two may end up meeting. You have to be careful.”

“But why? I would like to meet that person. It’d be—”

“Ignorant fool!” Sungyeol exclaimed haughtily. “The one who can start Time is your Anti. When matter meets anti-matter, what happens, do you know?”

“An-annihilation?” Myungsoo asked in a low voice, the momentum of the situation finally sinking in.

“Complete annihilation. You’ll disappear into a Timeless vortex, both of you,” Sungyeol said grimly.

“But how do I recognize that person? If we meet, we’ll explode? This is—”

“Technically speaking, no, you wouldn’t exactly ‘explode’, as you say, the moment you meet. It’s more like this, if you stop Time and then the other one starts it, that’s when the calamity will strike. And you’ll disappear into oblivion, no one will remember you. So basically, it will wipe out your existence. No one will know a Kim Myungsoo had ever lived.”

Myungsoo felt the ground beneath him shake and then give away. The euphoria in his brain started to diffuse out as fast as it had taken form. If he wanted to save himself, he had to stop his Time games; he had to bury his infinitizing power with his own hand and sane mind.

“Be careful, Myungsoo. Time is a dangerous element, being Timeless is an even greater peril.”

With that, Sungyeol disappeared and Time started. No, Myungsoo didn’t start it; he had just ceased to stop it.

Ever since the strange encounter with Sungyeol, Myungsoo was restless and wary. He tried to limit using his powers, but even when he wasn’t strolling through a world on pause, he felt suffocated. He had grown so addicted to the awe-inspiring diadem he possessed, which he had worn proudly for so long, that constraining himself was no lesser feat that denying his own existence. His life had been insipid before he had recognized his powers, and even insufferable and agonizing at some points. Being an aberration to an intelligent family and trying to live up to expectations that he knew he couldn’t meet had been onerous but then, he had found a way to rise above the platitude, beyond those commoners’ reach, beyond Time’s strangulating leash. He was Infinite, and yet he felt so confined, so threatened.

Maybe it was a reaction to the stuffiness in his chest, but whenever he stopped Time, instead of curbing himself to the vicinity, he began to wander around, walking through previously untrodden streets and venturing into places he had never been to before. On one such expedition, he found a door that held his curiosity for an excruciatingly long time. He didn’t know what about the door had exactly caught his attention, or what had rooted him to the spot in front of the door, but even when his concentration had slipped and time had resumed—he found himself at the very spot, in front of the bronze door in the wall. The door didn’t seem to lead to anywhere and yet Myungsoo couldn’t resist the urge to open it and take a peek. Perhaps what fuelled his urge was the fact that the people around him were oblivious to the door’s presence. It made the door special—something that was not for the eyes of the average people had to be special. That, perhaps, was the reason why he had pushed the door inwards to reveal a stony passageway that lead to a small, circular clearing. At the centre of the rough circle, which was dotted with sparse trees, a stone was placed and on it, sat someone with their back to him. He paused when he saw the figure sitting motionless, reckoning his next move.

Myungsoo hesitated, wondering if he should speak first when he heard a voice, soft and mellifluous.

“If you were able to see the door, it must mean that you’re different as well.”

“Different?” Myungsoo scoffed, deeply offended. “I’m special.”

“So that’s what you like to think?”

“Excuse me? Who the hell are you?” Myungsoo hadn’t meant to sound so indignant, but he didn’t like to be underestimated.

“Good question. Well, how do I introduce myself? I’ve come from darkness and I’m heading towards light. But my final destination is unknown. Maybe I’ll end up in darkness again.”

Myungsoo couldn’t stop his eyebrows from rising. “What’s that supposed to mean? What’s your name?”

“Is that even important? Names don’t matter. You know, I don’t know your name but I can tell that you are the one who stalls Time. I, on the other hand, complete the circle.”

Myungsoo was caught off guard. He hadn’t expected the stranger to know about his powers.

“What circle? And can you please turn around, I feel uncomfortable if I can’t see your face.”

“Ah, being polite now, are we? What caused the sudden shift in voice?”

Myungsoo quickly looked down, embarrassed; when he regained composure and looked up, the stranger had turned to face him.

Once again, he was thrown off. Because in front of him, was an angel—not in the spiritual sense but he was as aesthetically pleasing as one; ethereal and intangible. His dark hair fell to his nape. His eyes were exceptionally bright, so much so, that it looked like they were sparkling in the Sun. At first Myungsoo couldn’t decide if it was a boy or a girl; he could actually, but he couldn’t care less. He approached him tentatively and returned his blissful smile.

“I…um, sorry for earlier, I was…”

“It’s ok, really.” Another smile, a brighter one. Myungsoo’s heart might or might not have skipped a beat. It was difficult for him to keep track of those minute details.

“W-what were you saying about circles…”

“Yes, I complete the circle. You stall, and I start.”

Something caught in his throat. He shivered, as if from cold. The warmth from earlier evaporated slightly.

“You’re the one who can start Time?”

“Indeed. But…well, you make it sound as if the choice is mine. Unfortunately, that’s not the case. Once Time stops, I have to start it. ”

 “Then…I’ve stopped Time countless times, why haven’t you—”

Sungjong laughed. “I just came here.”

Myungsoo frowned. “Where have you been?”

“I have been in lots of different places really. Different Times.”

Sungjong had then explained about parallel Timelines, alternate versions of the world Myungsoo called home. Much of the jargon Sungjong had used didn’t make sense to Myungsoo, but he heard it all, awestruck—whether by the information he was gleaning or by Sungjong, he didn’t know. Sungjong had gone on to explain how he had been Time-hopping for as long as he could remember. He couldn’t remember beyond that. He had never lived long in one Timeline, only long enough to start the Time that had been stopped.

“It’s not my choice really. I don’t understand half the things myself,” Sungjong had said in a resigned voice.

Sungjong returned home with Myungsoo, after all he had no place to say. But first, Sungjong had made him promise that he wouldn’t stop Time anymore.

“Because if you do, I have to start it. And I trust you know the consequences?” He had said. Myungsoo nodded. Sungjong sighed and muttered under his breath, “That’s what they all say, but then their inflated heads get the better of them.”

But Myungsoo’s head had deflated, almost instantly after talking to Sungjong. His days of abstinence were of no pain to him; Sungjong was his balm. He didn’t feel the need to elongate Time, because when Sungjong was around, everything happened in slow motion. It was in slow motion that he fell in love. It was as if something had clicked in the right place—he couldn’t exactly describe it. It was more than the touches and the feels, the looks and the smiles, the hesitation and the boldness, the shadows and the lights—it was overwhelming—the feeling of being in love.

If love is a Sin, they had committed the worst Sin of all—Forbidden Love, love that had to remain hidden, love between Antis—they were canoeing down the River of Wrong. But what could Myungsoo do? He was in too deep and it was too late; he was doomed anyways.

Myungsoo had ceased doing it, stopping Time. One so powerful, yet so constrained. He promised himself he wouldn’t. He didn’t need an Infinite life; a lifetime with Sungjong would mean much more than that. He laughed to himself, thinking how only a few days ago he’d have given anything to parade the fact that he was the Master of Eternity. But now, all of that didn’t matter. The wish to become Infinite had crumbled away, along with his pride. Every second with Sungjong felt like forever.

The thought of the future he hoped to have with Sungjong overshadowed his imposing past. The footprints left by the glorious memories were washed away by the tide that lapped against his heart, that smelled of Sungjong.

But that day, that fateful day, he just had to. He saw Sungjong standing in the middle of the busy road, about to be run over by a car and even before Myungsoo knew it, he had stopped Time. He ran onto the road through the frozen traffic and pulled Sungjong into a hug.

“What did you do?” Sungjong asked with tears in his eyes. 

“I saved you.”

“Why? You know you’re not supposed to stop Time around me. Now I have to start it and it will be the end. For us…for you.”

Myungsoo remained silent as he watched the tears stream down Sungjong’s cheeks, sparkling in the sunlight. Angel tears were supposed to be miraculous. He wondered if Sungjong’s tears could stop the inevitable from happening. He wondered if anything could.

“I knew this would happen. I knew someday, you would find an inevitable reason to stop Time. And then, I’d have to start it. That’s why I wanted to end my life. Why did you have to be here now, of all places? Why did you have to witness this?” Sungjong cried.

“You don’t have to start Time—”

“Unlike you, I have no choice. I was given none. You know that.”

“Why did it have to be this way?” Myungsoo asked, more to himself. Deep down inside, he presumably had felt an ill omen that day. He probably knew that he couldn’t escape Fate or Time, for that matter. Maybe that was why his aimless wandering along the streets had led him to that very junction. Perhaps, this had all been Time’s chicanery. Myungsoo probably had never been out of Time’s reach; he had, in all likelihood, been shackled by Time all along.

“I’m sorry Myungsoo, but Time has its own way of taking back control. No one can break away from the fetters of Time.”

“Do you think we might be spared? Do you think we might just turn up in another Timeline?” Myungsoo asked hopefully. The slight flutters in his heart that he usually associated with good occurrences, made him think that maybe Time was not that callous, maybe it stumbled too.

“I don’t know Myungsoo, I really don’t know.”

Myungsoo closed his eyes. The minute details he had missed out when he had met Sungjong came back to him. The way his heart had missed not one but several beats, the strange pull he had felt towards him, the way a shadow of sadness had crept into Sungjong’s eyes momentarily as if he’d known about their tragic end, the almost unnoticeable change in the air, the infinitesimal tipping of the scale—they all came back in a whirlpool and engulfed him.

His last breath with Sungjong—he would cherish the moment. He would immerse himself in the Infinity that was Sungjong, that was love.

“I love you Sungjong.”

Myungsoo looked into Sungjong’s eyes—those obscenely bright orbs that made him feel like rain drops were hitting his bare nape; that whispered to him silently that Sungjong loved him back. He had just wanted to spend a lifetime with Sungjong. Like a mere mortal, like a normal human who was ignorant of Time’s trickery.

But it was not to be.