On the Surface (bangdae)

Pseudo-family AU in which Yongguk and Daehyun are like cousins but aren't actually blood-related.

He didn't even think it was allowed to begin with.

Okay, so they weren't really related. But whenever Chuseok and New Year came around and other excuses were fabricated in order to cram the entire entended family into his grandparents' house, Daehyun and his family were always there. Always. In fact, he couldn't remember attending a single family gathering without them being there somewhere.

It should've been awkward, Yongguk imagined, to be surrounded by several other families who were blood-related and who'd been together and known each other most - if not all - their lives. Who invited Daehyun to the party? They were strangers, intruders, crashing intimate parties and showing up pretending to be one of them, like how people would somehow manage to sneak into a club with fake IDs. But everyone in the household was Korean with the last name Bang or Jung, and the relatives trusted each other with their deepest secrets and disgusting habits and felt comfortable enough to just be themselves while not giving a damn about anything, so at some point or another someone must've thought, Well damn, we might as well be called a family. And sure, why not? He wouldn't have known Daehyun wasn't really his cousin anyway if his mother hadn't told him.

Not that he saw him any differently.

Long story short, Yongguk's father and Daehyun's father had been business partners since who-knew-when, and somewhere along the way both their mothers had gotten close. Yongguk's mother had Yongguk (obviously) and Daehyun's mother had Himchan. And with the accompanying special bond that formed between two pregnant woman, Daehyun's family joined his own seamlessly, as if it had been established that way from the start. Relatives on his father's side - which made up most of his entire family - eventually forgot they shared not a drop of blood with the Jungs. Even to him, they made up one of the three Jung families in the entended family.

So, of course, Yongguk and Daehyun took to consider each other his cousin.

--

Yongguk didn't remember anything about the day Daehyun was born, which was normal for a four-year-old.

Looking back, though, Daehyun had been in a good amount of his childhood photos. And before he came along, it was just him and Daehyun's brother, Himchan, and because they were the same age, they'd gotten along better. Even when Yongguk was reluctant to include Daehyun in their games with his other - real - cousins, Himchan would always take care of his younger brother.

He remembered being in the crowded, claustrophobic house on those frequent special occasions, where he would immediately dart to an empty seat and plant his rear firmly in it before anyone else could. What he'd busy himself with other than eating and teasing the little kids was all hazy, but the memory of his aunts fussing over Daehyun's thinness remained etched in his memory. There was a sort of routine: the Jungs would enter the house, Daehyun's body would be scrutinized by all the women in the house, and then said boy would hide himself in the weirdest places with a plate full of food. He wouldn't see him again until it was time to leave.

He'd always known how to get away from all the chaos.

He wasn't awkward - just quiet. Mysterious, even. He was friendly and had a nice smile, but that was about it. He had a tendency to slouch, his accent was heavy whenever he talked (which wasn't often at all), and he had the bulkiest glasses he'd ever seen. He was skinny, his hair was long, and he gave the impression of a bookworm with his behavior and simple clothes that barely kept him warm. Yongguk, on the other hand, preferred to be comfortable, yes, but also to look presentable at the same time. He couldn't deal with kids who didn't know how to live and he wasn't the type to bother with them, either. Yongguk rarely took anything seriously.

He was all about having fun and living in the moment. He wouldn't let some trivial crap weigh him down and gnaw at his conscience. He was like wind - always moving, always experiencing new things in new environments.

In other words, it was hard to piss him off.

Daehyun wasn't annoying. A straggler, maybe, or something more like a burden.

At least he wasn't a noisy brat.

--

They hit those awkward teenage years.

That was when Yongguk's voice deepened ten-fold and he and Himchan grew almost an inch every night while Daehyun remained short, skinny, and quiet. Being a few years older, Yongguk and Himchan started becoming interested in partying and girls.

That was, until Yongguk realized he wasn't really all that into girls. Though he didn't exactly know what this meant, either - or maybe it was that he didn't want to know.

--

School was a blast.

He and Himchan were in the same school, same grade, same class. He and Daehyun? They saw each other, more often in certain years when they attended the same school than in others when they didn't.

In the halls, Daehyun would say hi or wave excitedly to him, and he, like all the cool kids did, would make a gruff sound of acknowledgement or nod or stick out his chin in his direction. In all honesty, he didn't much like to be associated with him outside of the family gatherings, but since the Jungs lived only two blocks away and their parents worked during the day, Yongguk's mother would pick them all up after school and there was no way of concealing the fact that they were somehow connected beyond school grounds.

People were curious. People would asked about their relationship. Any sane person would spare others the long, complicated story, and since he'd been told he was a perfectly normal boy, it was easier for him to say, "Oh, they're my cousins," which also carried the implied, So that means I have to be seen with Daehyun whether I like it or not.

--

As they spent more time together, he minded Daehyun's presence less and less, until one day he decided that Daehyun was cool enough to hang.

On those crazy Friday nights, it would usually be Yongguk, Himchan, and a few other buddies from school. This night, though, he decided to bring Daehyun along.

Himchan was worried.

"Are you crazy?! That's my little brother!"

Yongguk rolled his eyes. "Relax, mom. We're gonna be there too, remember? Besides, it's not like we ever plan to get totally wasted or go to shady clubs."

Just then, Daehyun emerged from his bedroom. Yongguk's and Himchan's eyes moved to the top of the staircase from their place in the foyer. Himchan slapped his own forehead with his palm, and Yongguk did the same mentally.

"Hyunnie, I love you, I really do, but - just...no."

Yongguk pulled a bag of clothes from behind his back. "You're lucky I came prepared." Daehyun caught the bundle minus the ease and grace and headed back to his room dejectedly.

I barely talk to him, and yet I know him so well. Yongguk sighed and thought that maybe bringing him wouldn't be such a good idea after all.

--

Thanks to his own excellent taste in clothes, Daehyun actually looked pretty decent.

Sandwiched between the two elders, Daehyun's shoulders slouched inward, and Yongguk was getting tired of nudging him with his elbow to tell him to stand up straight. Daehyun jumped, but still he couldn't be seen with his short and fragile stature.

After a parade of girls successfully managed to seduce their way into the club, the three of them were up. "Bastards," Yongguk muttered. "They were all excited to party and pick up chicks until I mentioned Daehyun's name."

Daehyun bowed his head in shame, an action to which Yongguk remained unfazed.

"Hey, Yongguk. What's up?"

"Not much, man."

A bro handshake and then another before he was in. He waited in the shadows with his back to the rest of his party, trying not to be obvious. Daehyun stepped forward.

"Whoa, there. ID."

Ha, that was a good one. Since when did they check IDs? Yongguk whipped the upper half of his body around. "Hey, he's with me." Though Yongguk was only twenty, he could pass as being several years older. Daehyun, on the other hand...

"Sorry, man. Rules are rules."

Yongguk scoffed but said nothing more. Whatever.

Said item was shown.

The bouncer made an amused face. He tapped his friend's arm and whispered not-so-discreetly. Though he couldn't hear exactly what was being said over the blaring music from inside, he could tell by the way the two heavily muscled men laughed and pointed at Daehyun that they were making fun of him.

"You sure you're seventeen? You look more like ten or twelve to me, kid," his friend snickered.

And with that, Yongguk's fist connected with his right jaw, snapping his head back and sending his large body crash-landing on the ground.

Well, that was one way to piss Bang Yongguk off.

--

Daehyun could get low.

He didn't know what he'd expected. Prior to their arrival at the back of a huge line, Yongguk could already imagine different scenarios of what it'd be like once they got inside - Daehyun in a corner sipping on tap water, avoiding both eye and physical contact with all others in the dark and noisy room.

And he was way off.

Once he finally got over his shock when his brain registered the smug I-told-you-he-was-cool look on Himchan's face, he walked over to the bar to get a few beers. His eyes, however, seemed to automatically find Daehyun in the dense crowd of people on the dancefloor.

Without thinking about anything other than how he picked the absolute perfect size for Daehyun's skinny jeans, he his lips.

--

There was one person missing during the holidays.

Yongguk would stare at the full plates of food on the table, untouched, then at the weirdest and least crowded hiding places in the house before staring at his stolen seat that was now occupied by one of his bratty cousins. Cousins....

He went up to Himchan and struggled for a way to casually bring up the subject. "So, uhhh...where's your brother?"

Yeah. Casual.

Himchan talked around a mouthful of rice. "Daehyunnie? Oh, he's been really into his training lately. Have I told you he wants to be a singer?"

Yongguk raised an eyebrow. "A singer? I didn't know he liked to sing."

"You've also never heard him speak." Himchan laughed. "There's a lot you don't know about my cute little brother ~ "

"Yeah...." Yongguk furrowed his eyebrows. "He is cute, isn't he?"

--

He was starting to dread seeing the entire family.

For one thing, the kids were growing up too fast and were, therefore, taking up more space (and it wasn't like the house was getting any bigger). For another, it had been exactly thirty-two get-togethers since he'd last seen Daehyun.

On the thirty-third, which happened to be during the New Year, he was busy fighting with his bratty cousin for his rightful seat when surprised gasps followed by ecstatic screams emerged from the foyer. Yongguk's interest was piqued as he set out for the foyer where he had to wrestle his way between what seemed like all the squealing and gawking women in the house.

"Let me through!" Somehow, he'd made it to the front of the pack, but he still didn't know what he was supposed to be looking at. "What's all the fuss abo - ?"

He couldn't finish his sentence.

Formerly long brown hair cut shorter. Still skinny, but healthier and ier. Taller, though lacking a few inches from his own height. More form-fitting clothes. And was it just him or did he have some dental work done?

"Dae - ?"

"Omo! Is that my little Hyunnie?!"

A sudden wave of gushing women pushed him all the way to the back and onto his . He didn't get a chance to be within five feet of Daehyun for the rest of the night.

--

Was he shallow?

Looks - was that all that did it? Just think about it, Yongguk. You hardly know the kid - you didn't even know his hobbies or interests! - and here you are madly in love with him and only realizing it after he changed. Coincidence?

Himchan walked in on his thinking session, iced coffee in hand. Taking obnoxious sips while sitting down on the couch next to Yongguk, he broke the silence after realizing the other wasn't going to. He sighed. "Look, Guk, I know you're probably in hell right now, but let me just tell you one thing before Daehyun walks in any second now." Sip. "You've been my best friend for, well, since I was born, really. We're like brothers. So, as a brother, I want you to know that I trust you completely."

Yongguk raised an eyebrow. "Uhh...thanks."

Himchan rolled his eyes. "Oh, please. Don't act like you don't know what I'm talking about. You weren't exactly discreet while undressing my baby brother with your eyes."

And instant later, Yongguk's face burned a bright shade of crimson. "I - I...I - "

"And I'm talking about before he started showing off his good looks, which, of course, runs in the family."

Sip. A smug expression. Caught you.

--

"Is it even allowed?"

Himchan turned to him with an incredulous expression. "Dude, I said we're like brothers. Have you forgotten? We're not actually related!"

"But wouldn't it be...weird? Like, at the family gatherings and stuff?"

"Then make it not weird." Yongguk wanted more than anything to wipe that duh look off his face. "Nothing's changed. He's still the same Daehyun you know - or want to know, at least."

Yongguk thought about it for a moment. It all made sense now - the reason why he wasn't into girls, why he got pissed when those bouncers made fun of Daehyun, why he had been so mezmorized and intrigued by the unexpected side of him shown that night. It wasn't just the way he looked.

There was more to the mystery, and he wanted to know.

"Thanks, Himchan. You're the best."

With a satisfied smile, he nodded in agreement as he stood up. "Guess I'll see you soon for your grandparents' anniversary, eh? But...keep it below the surface, alright? I think your real relatives forget sometimes that we're not actually blood-related." The sound of his laughter faded as he exited the living room. Yongguk smiled.

The front door opened and a sweet voice called out.

--

He'd gotten used to the new look.

If he looked close enough, it wasn't actually all too different. More polished, brighter, yes, but still the same. Himchan was right.

Nothing had changed in the household. It was still crowded, there was still food on the table, and everyone still treated each other like family. But when Yongguk had a miracle and found two empty chairs side-by-side next to a table, Yongguk reached over under the table and took Daehyun's hand in his. From the corner of his eye, he saw a small, shy smile form on Daehyun's lips.

Thank goodness they weren't really related.