Kris' scent aded the air. It was sweet to Lay. He inhaled Kris' odor. Somehow he became addicted to it.

"By the way Yixing, are you free this Saturday?" Kris suddenly asked.

"Y-yes," he stammered and immediately hope swirled around his mind.

"Cool, let's go out for dinner then."

Lay grinned like an idiot. He couldn't help it.

If I tell him, then everything is over. Like dominoes, if one is knocked down, then the rest follows.

Over.

Unless I take the time to rebuild everything again, but how much time will that consume?

"Ah.. Your girlfriend is here.." Lay said and purposely inflected the word girlfriend.

"Yeah and she brought a friend too!" Kris beamed.

"Why are you doing this?" 

"You seem lonely! My girlfriend and I are going to help set you up—"

"No thanks." Lay cut in and walked away without a care.

He didn't bother to see the surprised looks on Kris' girlfriend and her friend's face. Nothing mattered.

I'm really just a nonentity to him. The morose thought of it hurts. I will continue to defer these feelings until it is no longer in me. I wish for it to vanish, so that I can act as if it never existed in the first place.

"Stop being so reluctant on everything," Kris yelled at Lay.

"Stop bothering me. You're really annoying these days!" Lay threw daggers at Kris with his eyes.

"I-I'm just trying to help you.." He tried to defend himself.

"Well you're definitely not helping me at all!" 

"Well, I didn't know!" Kris frowned.

"Of course you didn't! Don't you know that you don't know anything about me?" Lay rolled his eyes.

"It's not my fault! You're so secretive and distant! I hate it!" Kris complained.

"Do you regret it?" Lay's face soften.

"What?" Kris snapped.

"Do you regret being my friend?" he asked.

"No, why?"

"Because I regret it. I regret talking to you." Lay spoke quietly and calmly even though his words could cause damage.

I regret it because I now like you. I regret it because now it hurts.

"Oh..." Kris murmured. "I see."

I realized I went astray as soon as I gained  these feelings for him. Of course he wont like it if he ever found out. It's not normal. I'm not normal. Aren't I suppose to like girls? I can't help it though.

"Hey.." Lay mumbled as he stared down at his shoes.

"Hey.." Kris gave him an awkward grin.

"I'm sorry for saying such mean words to you.."

"It's fine, but when can you stop being so secretive and distant?" Kris asked.

"I'm sorry.." Lay looked up and made eye contact with Kris.

"How long do I have to wait? Seriously. Just how much more time do I have to wait?"

"Until the leaves fall again." Lay answered softly.

"I'm willing to wait then. You're a good friend to me." Kris smiled, a gentle one yet deadly.

It can never be reciprocated, that's why I can never tell you. It never mattered. My feelings.

Never.

Such feelings. I hate them. If I knew it was going to be excruciating, then I shouldn't have talked to him in the first place. I shouldn't have been attached to him. I shouldn't have become friends.

Regret. I regret it.

Regret. I regret it so much.

That's why I will hide these feelings. Forever. 

I won't ever tell you, if it means that only I would shed tears and that you would be happy. So just save those lucid tears of yours.

It was clear. His tears were clear, but they're also fragile.

I realized that I won't ever see them again.

okay I'm ending it.. don't kill me please.. It's just impossible for a straight guy to turn homo so quickly and this is a short story so ya, sad ending it is!

so... haha I was "busy"* these days haha so I finally updated...

Thank you everyone for reading or attempting to read it and for subscribing and commenting. <3

*busy=lazy

A/N: I will prob fix errors in the near future.