You're Mine

Chapter 2

They stayed like that for a couple of peaceful minutes, Yesung's eyes closed, head resting against Kyuhyun’s chest, the heart beating there a sweet companion, fingers tapping a calming melody against his back, a strong hand gripping his side, nose buried in the apple scented throat of the younger man, mind in a relaxed position, Kyuhyun seemingly more relaxed or atleast in a fair healing position, the heat from the body pressed against him giving him strength, helping to banish the image that tortured him, Yesung affirming that he was his, going a long way to make the visions less painful, his rationality slowly repairing all the damage, putting all the stray thoughts away, correcting his follies, bargaining with the Fire, slowly settling its blaze, all made easier with Yesung's weight against him. The longer he held on to him was better for his weakened heart. He felt the strength he needed to deal all his crazy thoughts and as per usual, the little flutters in his depths, an embarrassing sort of joy. Yesung's presence was always a benefit to him, even when he wanted to strangle him or punch him in the face for being so adorable. Once Yesung was in his arms it would all be alright. It was cheesy and stupid, but the feeling remained the same.

His thoughts however opened up something that he had been trying very hard to deny, Yesung actually adding to his pain. He was not ready to deal with it yet, not ready to let him go. Ignorance was bliss, it really was. Yesung needed to stop doing things like that Kyuhyun decided, his face contouring into a grimace as the words replayed in his mind, a sharp shooting pain spreading throughout his body, everything lurching against the very thought, body reaching instantly, grip tightening around the man resting comfortably in his arms, Yesung not fighting him, just pulling himself more against Kyuhyun, assuming that Kyuhyun wanted him closer, not even opening his eyes. Kyuhyun felt sort of sick then, deciding that Yesung was too blame for his pain, using the hand gripping at the man’s side to inflict pain, a form of punishment. He released his hold for a split second, a long finger pulling back to stick Yesung in the ribs, punishment administered.

“Why?” The question was instantaneous, Yesung pulling back, flinching at the small pain. Honestly it was not that painful, flinching more from the shock than the actual impact. He was just there resting against Kyuhyun, eyes closed, focused on the thumping of Kyuhyun’s heartbeat, reconciling his mind to the fact that there was nowhere else he rather be than with Kyuhyun, that no matter how much he tried to fool himself, that he was lost to the snarky brat, that Kyuhyun smelt really nice even after so many hours, and quite possibly that he loved apples the most and since when was Kyuhyun’s chest so firm anyway? Basically he had a lot on his mind then, so it was quite shocking to have Kyuhyun do something so violent…well not really violent, but once again more childish than anything else. He was positive Kyuhyun was feeling better. The light had returned to his eyes earlier when they were playing and whilst he was aware that the thoughts wouldn’t just vanish, he was confident that he had done enough to settle Kyuhyun’s heart and mind, to assure him that he had nothing to fear, that he was very committed to him and the relationship…that he belonged to him, even that possessive beast that found a haven in Kyuhyun. After all that he was positive that Kyuhyun would atleast think before he reacted, so he was quite surprised when that finger dug into his rib area. He would have glared but he was more concerned that Kyuhyun was thinking something ridiculous than he was mad honestly.

“Stop it. Stop talking about the army” Kyuhyun instructed seriously, voice low and steady, looking Yesung dead in the eye with strength, though the fear and nervousness he tried to conceal was much to clear in his eyes. Even if he was able to hide it in his voice, he couldn’t hide it in his face, looking like a scared child. Kyuhyun was rather upset. He had let it go in favour of more vexing matters, but had kept it in mind that he had to reprimand Yesung for speaking such hateful words….’Reprimand? Are you sure it’s not begging?’….his mind indicated, this time a bit solemnly, both willing to admit that maybe he was pleading. The words were spoken in ease, in front of so many people, no care or consideration, Yesung acting as if he was not ripping out Kyuhyun’s insides. Maybe he was being dramatic, but he was just preparing for the future. He tried to hide it for Yesung's sake…..Fine! For both their sakes. He was sure the day Yesung left for the army it would like tearing his heart apart.

Yesung was part of him then. He couldn’t be away from him. He just couldn’t. The idea that wouldn’t be able to hold his hands or rest in his arms, about his head or hands, not gaze at his mesmerizing almond eyes, even just standing beside him, was painful and scary. So scary that he refused to think about it. Every time it was brought up he wanted to shove the words back down. It was just not something that he wanted mentioned and worst yet mentioned by Yesung with such ease. Would it be easy to leave Kyuhyun behind? So easy to let go of Kyuhyun’s hands? He could not even think about it without the urge to empty his stomach from the feeling of utter dread and Yesung could speak about it so causally. It was two long years of separation, which automatically meant suffering. Kyuhyun couldn’t spend a week away from Yesung without an internal mutiny and withdrawal symptoms, yet Yesung was acting as if two years would be easy for them, talking about leaving Kyuhyun so casually. It was anything but easy. Going that long without Yesung's warmth or drowning in the sweet aroma of coffee and cinnamon would be like piercing his own heart and watch his life slip away before his eyes. He knew that it had to be done, he really did, but he didn’t want to think about it and worst he didn’t want it ever mentioned. Atleast not for a long while and especially not by Yesung. He could strangle him for even saying it, but would rather hope Yesung could assure him that he had a long time left….he would….wouldn’t he?

Yesung sighed then, feeling everything all at once, primarily resignation and that bit of regret. He couldn’t help wonder if they wasted time. If he wasn’t such a stubborn oblivious idiot and Kyuhyun an emotionally inept fool , just how much time they would have had to together? They could have spent all those years wrapped up in each other, feeling that sort of happiness. They were fools. He hated that they were too stupid to see what they had, mad at himself and mad at Kyuhyun. Why didn’t they give themselves more time together? He would get to leave at a time when they would be sure of everything and not feel as much loss, having even more memories to help them survive. He was too stupid, he really was. ‘Love happens when it is supposed to happen’ his mind guided calmly. Yesung was not interested in listening to it though, his mind wondering why he didn’t just grab the awkward kid’s hand on that first meeting and never let go. He knew though, that no matter how mad he was or how much he wished to go back in time and kick his younger self hard in the rump and shake sense into the bumbling idiot, his mind was right. Love happened when it was supposed to. Maybe they weren’t ready for love then. He was immature and desperate then, wanting to hold on his chance of success so bad that he wouldn’t have properly taken care of someone else. Kyuhyun was awkward and shy and then he wasn’t somebody that Kyuhyun could approach, his own resentment for Kyuhyun ensuring that he never could come close enough to the younger man to understand him. In time they had both grown and became the people they needed to be to love each other and be happy.

Even if he wished with his whole heart, Yesung knew that neither of them were ready to love each other then. Even as time passed, it took time to shape their own personalities and thoughts so that they could match each other, to be able to bend against each other and create the perfect picture, the most intricate complete puzzle. Day by day they became the people they had to be to love each other the way they did. Yesung had to get over his insecurities and his doubts to open himself up to Kyuhyun and the younger man had to be willing to let the mask fall away and let someone else in, to get accustomed to other people within his sphere. There was no perfect time for love, just the right time. Yesung bitterly wished that, that time was much sooner however. ‘Be grateful that the time came. You are better than so many others’ his mind advised and Yesung couldn’t disagree.

He was wrong to be so ungrateful. So many people in the world lived their whole life and never found that sort of love no matter how hard they searched. He wasn’t even looking and he stumbled upon his own heaven. So what if it took a little while, it still happened, he still knew what it was like to love so completely. Even though he could never get over that bit of regret as to all the time they wasted with the denials and the pretending, but he could understand the necessity. Love happens when it is supposed to, simply because people had to be ready to accept love, to be strong enough to fight for it. No matter how much he tried to fool himself, he knew he was in no way ready to love Kyuhyun neither at 22 nor at 24. He loved him or atleast understood his love when he was supposed to, when he could do it justice. It was time lost and for that he was sorry even if he could understand why it was so. He would never not regret it though. It was time away from Kyuhyun’s arms, and that would always be regretful.

The army thing was a necessity. He knew that. It was his duty as a strong man of the Korean Republic. He was son of the soil and more than willing to serve his country, just as his father did. He was willing, even if he had some reservations. He hated the idea of leaving Kyuhyun, especially now, when they had only then discovered each other. He felt actually aches at the thought alone, a hole opening up in the pits of his stomach just at the thought of leaving his baby behind. He couldn’t do it. It would kill him in the insides, would rip his heart to shreds and shatter his mind. He had too though. At the end of the day he had to, that was what it all boiled down to anyway. No matter what he felt in the matter or how much he dreaded the very idea of it, he had a duty to his country and his family to make them proud. It was his birth right as a Korean. He couldn’t turn his back on something like that, in fact it was illegal to do so, but that was beside the point. No matter what he felt he still had to go and that day was soon approaching. The time for pretending and ignoring was long over. It was just a matter of time now, not a distant when, but the span of a breath. He couldn’t ignore it any longer or pretend that if he didn’t think about it, it would disappear. He was an adult with responsibilities. He had to put his things in order, make the necessary provisions and the right career decisions. Burying his head in the sand would benefit no one. He had taken the time to make peace with his fate. That is not to say that he didn’t have fears or worries or the endless feeling to pretend it was not true, just that he found a way, above it all to handle them. The very idea still terrified him and made him want to cry sometimes but he accepted it for what it was. He had to mentally prepare himself and the first step was accepting and admitting that his enlistment date was near.

Silence didn’t mean it went away. He had to prepare himself and his family, his fans and most of all he had to prepare Kyuhyun. That was one subject that he had so far avoided broaching with Kyuhyun. They both had this silent agreement that sort of just sprang up that they would ignore the enlistment issue as long as possible. That duration had unfortunately been met. Leeteuk’s enlistment made it abundantly clear that he didn’t have much time left. Ignoring it was not the right course of action anymore. He once more had a duty, not only to himself but to Kyuhyun. He couldn’t just leave him. He had to ensure that Kyuhyun understood what was going on and what was to happen and most importantly he had to ensure that Kyuhyun would be alright. He wasn’t too sure that he would be alright either but atleast he had to try to get both of them to that point of understanding. He was under no delusions to simplicity. He knew it would be a difficult process. Just the thought of it felt like searing knives digging into his liver, no doubt the actual moment of separation and its persistence would be like draining the life out of his body. He knew this. The only way to survive was to prepare and to prepare they had to address it at some point.

“Kyu ah, we have to talk about it at some point” Yesung informed, his voice a little sad but pushing forward with courage. It would be a difficult conversation to have, to even listen to. Even looking at Kyuhyun would be hard, the younger’s eyes already clouding in sadness, a lot of the teasing happiness he had before slowly draining out of his face and body. Yesung was not looking forward to it then, nor was he honestly expecting to talk about it then. He had hoped to give them a little  more of time to prepare and maybe ease into it, have the discussion in better settings when Kyuhyun was in a better mood, but then was a good as any time to talk about it. The longer he ran away from it the harder it would be for them to address it. They honestly couldn’t pretend that the army enlistment was not a fact that would require discussion and serious preparation. He was decidedly unwilling to just leave Kyuhyun in any state, when he did. He hoped that he could be assured that Kyuhyun would handle it well, as well as ensuring that he did not lose his own mind missing the younger man. It was important that both of them prepared themselves, not only for their own sakes, but each others. Yesung would suffer indescribably if all he did when he enlisted was worry about Kyuhyun and his wellbeing. No matter what he did, he knew he would worry about Kyuhyun, he would miss him, but he had to atleast try and find a way to make it bearable for the both of them. To even start that process; they both had to have the courage to atleast begin discussions. He knew they weren’t ready for more, but they had to recognize that it was not something they could ignore and it would go away. That acceptance was vital.

“Not yet Hyung” Kyuhyun said solemnly, almost as if he was pleading, his eyes drawn and downcast, not looking at the man in his arms, body tensing as the hateful thoughts made its way through his body. Yesung didn’t understand. Kyuhyun was in no way ready to have that conversation. He was not an idiot and no matter how adverse he was to its existence he was very much aware that Yesung's enlistment was a pressing reality. At most they had 6 months, with benevolent luck they may get to a year, but that was unlikely. It was soon, much too soon for Kyuhyun’s liking. No matter how hard he tried to pretend that fact did not exist, he was very much aware that it was alive and well, continuously being reminded about it from his circumstances. Leeteuk’s enlistment serving to bring it all home to him once again.

He was already depressed enough over his Hyung and Leader leaving them behind, but the very idea that he would have to utter a similar goodbye to Yesung, crippling his heart and causing genuine pain in his depths. He could throw up if it meant getting rid of the sickening thought, the even more painful reality. He couldn’t though. He knew that. Despite his emotional involvement in the matter, he was a rational person. He knew his denial did not make it disappear, yet he was very unwilling to discuss it. It was one thing to know that something was true, but accepting it and discussing it was another all together. It would definitely make it much more real than Kyuhyun was willing to permit. He still liked his delusions that permitted him to think that Yesung would be at his side, smacking him for being a petty jackass forever, never once leaving his side. He knew that the army thing did not mean love would wean or anything like that, just that he despised the idea of being away from Yesung. It was hateful and disgusting and he just couldn’t stomach it. He didn’t want to think about it, much less talk about it. He couldn’t stop it, which made it even more contemptible, so he would just have to learn to accept it. He was determined however, not to let it ruin the time he did have. He refused to have it mentioned, and especially refused to have it mentioned by Yesung. When the older man said it so calmly at the party he felt as if his sides fell away, leaving him in this incomplete state, pain radiating from his depths, he wanted to strangle him honestly. Yesung was never supposed to say things like that, never supposed to say it with such ease. It was anything but easy. Kyuhyun really wanted to live in his self controlled ignorance and one way or the other Yesung would have to help him there he decided, once more tightening his grip possessively, unrelenting and strong.

“We don’t have much time left Kyuhyun ah” Yesung informed with sadness, his own words making the thought a serious reality. It was one thing to contemplate it and think he would be able to accept it, but to actually verbalize the reality was more painful than he thought. He was right. There wasn’t much time left for him or for them. He did not fear the army, he only feared leaving Kyuhyun. It wasn’t even that superficial fear that everyone has, where he thinks Kyuhyun would leave him in that time, where he worried that Kyuhyun would move on and find someone better. He didn’t fear that something like that would happen when he was in the army, simply because he long accepted that it was a probable reality.

Kyuhyun could do that any point in time. He would never resent him for it. At no point in time he was ever deluded into thinking their relationship was easy. He would never fault Kyuhyun for getting some sense and realizing that loving him was too hard or just not worth it. It could happen at any point in time and was something that he had long accepted as the risk he took when he decided he wanted a relationship with Kyuhyun. It was sure heart ache he was welcoming, putting his possible wellbeing in jeopardy. That was the chance he took and he had long come to accept the consequences. He wanted to hold on to Kyuhyun but he only ever wanted to do so with Kyuhyun’s permission. He never wanted to let him go but if Kyuhyun asked him to, he would. If Kyuhyun decided during the time that he wanted to move on, then he would wish him happiness and find a way to piece together his shattered heart, bit by bit, but he would accept it. He did not fear Kyuhyun abandoning him then, more than aware that it was a possibility not just limited to his time in the army but quite possible at anytime. What he did fear about his enlistment however, was his inability to survive without Kyuhyun. He would miss him and miss him bad. He wasn’t sure how he would survive without the clingy brat annoying the hell out of him, how he would sleep without the warmth or the sweet smell of apples. He had a lot of worries in that regard.

As he had just indicated, he had little time left and a full mind of all the things he wanted to do with Kyuhyun, the worry that if he didn’t find a way to deal with the separation they would all suffer. He sighed in frustration then, Kyuhyun looking at him with equally sad frustrated eyes. He hated the sight of it, despised it really. He shifted his body once more, pulling himself closer to Kyuhyun, settling as close as possible to the younger man, snuggling his head against his throat, his own hands grabbing at Kyuhyun, rather enjoying the fingers clawing at his side. The feeling meant that Kyuhyun was beside him, that Kyuhyun understood his fears and his worries. He wouldn’t be able to survive very long without that, without the warmth. He really had to do something, anything.

“I know Hyung. I do. Can’t we just not talk about it right now?” Kyuhyun requested with a pleading voice, eyes sad and face flustered, twisting his body so that he could look at Yesung, or atleast trying too, deciding that it was much too difficult to fall into position, deciding to just hold on as  close as he possibly could, Yesung's breath tickling his throat and it’s a nice feeling. It makes his skin feel tingly and the little flutters are in his stomach once again. He much rather try to evict the fluttery feelings than talk about something like that. He knew he would achieve nothing by stalling for time so much, but he just didn’t have the strength to discuss it just then. Yesung was right. He knew that at some point he would have to address it, but he just couldn’t do it then. He had just gotten the fire to settle and his mind was slowly returning to sensibility, therefore unable to deal with such issues.

Anything that would take Yesung away from him always seemed to invoke painful thoughts and a desperate need to hold on to the older man. He had just more than likely scared him a little with his insanity, and he most certainly was not willing to chance a repeat. Talking about it would more than likely create the same response. He had just mentioned it and he felt this need to hold Yesung in an impenetrable grasp, to hide him away from the world, where no one found ever find him, where he would never leave him. It was frightening honestly, that fear that no matter how much he held on, he would lose him. It made his heart hurt and his mind drown in darkness. Yesung couldn’t leave him; he couldn’t be away from him. He refused to let him! He just wouldn’t do it. He couldn’t. He hated the thought. He pulled him even closer, hands squeezing the older man against him with an intensity that he couldn’t understand, wanting so badly to make him part of himself. What was he going to do?

“Not yet Hyung” this time it is desperate and pitiful, hands grabbing and squeezing, head burying in Yesung's hair, kissing everything he could, legs thrown over the smaller man as if he could act as some sort of prison, though Yesung knew him well enough to know that it was neither a cell nor a cage, it was simply a shield.

Kyuhyun didn’t behave that way because he had some sick need to own him or to possess him, he was like that because he was terrified of losing him. He always pretended that it was just his arrogance or his cockiness, his ability to own and command, but it was never like that now was it? Kyuhyun painfully holding on to him was never his way of expressing ownership. It was the child’s way of showing his love, of showing his fear that Yesung would leave him. The very idea of it broke Yesung's heart honestly. There was nothing flattering about it. He never wanted Kyuhyun ever have to feel that way. He wasn’t even sure Kyuhyun understood what he was feeling or if he could identify it. He was sorry for him, his heart aching at the suffering the younger must has experienced.

He had suspected as much for a while then, since Kyuhyun had confessed to feeling rather possessive of him after they went to the US for SMTown. Kyuhyun was upset then that Yesung did not spend time with him, confessing that he was much too possessive to tolerate Yesung spending his time with the others. At the time he was flattered. Kyuhyun loved him so much, yet he couldn’t get rid of the sneaking feeling that it was something so much bigger, something a lot scarier. He had seen flashes of it before, seen in the younger man’s eyes from time to time, that quiet fear he masked with possessiveness. Honestly it scared him. He hated that he didn’t know what to do to make Kyuhyun feel better and he despised the idea that he may have contributed to Kyuhyun’s fear. He just wanted to hold him in his arms and promise him that he never had anything to fear, that he would be with him forever, or until Kyuhyun was smart enough to let go. He was saddened and even more worried about Kyuhyun. His baby must suffer so damn much, but just had to be a stubborn jackass that always tried to act as if he was uncaring. How was Yesung supposed to deal with it if he didn’t understand it? Then again, Kyuhyun didn’t seem to realize the extent of his feelings in that regard either, so how could be blame him?

“Okay Kyuhyun ah. Not yet” Yesung appeased with a forced cheerful smile, Kyuhyun nodding at him, his grip not weakening in the least, Yesung smiling at him fondly, looking at the childish man clinging to him. Kyuhyun was rude and snarky and inconsiderate and often or not insensitive, but he was everything Yesung could ever want. He loved him so much that sometimes he thought he imagined it all. It had to be a fantasy or some really well written fanfiction somewhere. [A/N: Lol] That was the only place such a love was possible, that such emotion could exist.

Kyuhyun was not perfect, in fact he was far from, especially since he was practically suffocating him, but he never wanted anyone else, would never love someone as much. He felt great affection then, using his hands to hold on to Kyuhyun, wrapping around the younger man as best as he could, Kyuhyun not missing a second, pulling him almost on top of him once more, both just clinging to each other shamelessly, the embrace some messed up version of an over tight hug, snuggling into each other, Yesung positive they would have some aches and pains from their closeness, the human body not meant to be that interlinked with another, the friction created that was both comforting and painful, so wrapped up in each other that Yesung could feel nothing else, smell nothing but the sweet scent of apples, the only sound reaching his ears being Kyuhyun’s heart beat. It was his favourite sound honestly, something that he would never get tired of hearing. He knew that he was supposed to talk to Kyuhyun about the enlistment thing but he didn’t have the heart to do it then. He knew Kyuhyun wasn’t ready yet and in a way he wasn’t either. Kyuhyun was not in the right frame of mind to deal with that then clearly, still clinging to him like a koala. He didn’t want to upset Kyuhyun even more than necessary then. It was better to leave it for a while it would seem. He was willing to just let Kyuhyun hold on to him and to cling to the younger man. Maybe it was just what they both needed.

“It will be alright Kyuhyun ah. You know that right? It’ll be alright” Yesung promised, even if he wasn’t sure of the future. He made the promise simply because it had to be so. He never broke promises or atleast tried his hardest to never let that happen, so by promising Kyuhyun they would be okay he was vowing that he would do whatever it to took to protect them, to protect their relationship, that he would try his hardest to take care of Kyuhyun, that he would never let anything hurt him or hurt them. It was something that he was dead serious about. No matter what happened, he would make sure they stayed together and happy, one way or the other.

He was not only promising himself but he was promising Kyuhyun, which automatically meant it was even more imperative that he ensured that it was always honoured. He would take care of Kyuhyun, he really would. No matter what happened, it would all be okay. He was going to trust himself and trust Kyuhyun and for the second time in his life, he was just going to go on fate. He refused to believe that he and Kyuhyun had found such love by chance. He was not one for the stories about fate and all that drama, or atleast he didn’t give it as much credence as Kyuhyun did, but somehow he found himself thinking that there had to be a reason they were together. They had met each other in unique circumstances. Really? What were the chances of a young handsome talented bankable singer being into an already overfilled debuted project group? That by itself had to be done by some divine power. It was in such a way their lives progressed, through all their unique circumstances and situations, until one day he was in love with the snarky maknae, the brat digging into his sides and laughing at his small hands. He couldn’t help the thought that there had to be some sort of thread that intertwined them, that led them to this moment. It was their fate to be together and he prayed that it was that fate that would keep them together. He needed faith then honestly. He needed something to hold on to, something other than Kyuhyun.

“ I know Hyung. I know it will be” Kyuhyun confirmed with a smile, a genuine smile, snuggling closer to the person he loved. In all fairness, there was no way he could really be closer but he still tried. He knew that there was no way Yesung could be sure that it would be alright. No one had that ability, yet he trusted him. He trusted him when he said it would be alright, simply because it was Yesung that said it. He trusted the man sometimes more than he trusted himself and in that moment he would accept anything he said. He knew though that Yesung couldn’t realistically know that they would be alright but he was taking his words to be a vow, a promise made to them both to that he would try his best to give them that. Kyuhyun was accepting his end of the bargain as well. No matter how hard it got he was promising to do his best to endure that they got their happily ever after. He was Kyuhyun! He always got what he wanted and he never wanted anything else as much as he wanted to spend the rest of his life with Yesung. He was not going to let anything get his way, no matter what it was. If he had to hold to Yesung like some deranged child his whole life he would do it, he would sacrifice everything and anything else, he would never release his hands, he would do whatever it took and he meant it. Yesung was his destiny and there was nothing in existence that had better challenge him. He would even dare the heavens to deny him. He was insistent on having his own way on getting what he wanted and the only thing he wanted was Yesung.

The lead vocalist was his and it would always be that way. Kyuhyun was sure! He pressed a couple more kisses to the older man’s cheeks or well anywhere he could reach, their positions being super awkward because they kept grabbing at each other and tugging and pulling and were wrapped up with each other that that point, that neither knew where neither end or the beginning could be found. Kyuhyun wasn’t complaining, not at all, just that it was hard to kiss him as much as he would have liked, thinking he wouldn’t mind tasting Yesung's coffee flavoured mouth once more, blushing at the thought, an embarrassing giggle escaping his lips. He was hopeless, he chuckled.

“Just remember that….that I….I… love you” the last bit muffled by his movements, Yesung twisting in Kyuhyun’s arms, reaching up to kiss him tenderly. Unlike Kyuhyun’s kisses, this wasn’t rough or forceful or passionate or filled with longing. It was a gentle press of lips, soft teasing movements, tender nibbles and a few well timed tugs, Kyuhyun holding for dear life, his fingers ghosting over the man’s skin, thinking instantly that he was much too delicate to touch, Yesung shifting against him, practically climbing on his body so that he could kiss him comfortably, sliding until he was at Kyuhyun’s side, the younger man twisting onto his side, so he could accommodate Yesung, his hands holding on to him as they both lay on their sides, joined at the lips, hands holding on to each other’s side. The kiss never becomes intrusive and Kyuhyun doesn’t force it. He likes the tenderness; he likes the bolts of electricity shooting through his body, the flutter storm in his stomach and the heat gushing through his body. Everywhere is warm and tingly and he is sure that is how it is always supposed to be, kissing back with subdued fervour, keeping the gentleness intact, and pulling, Yesung's face a burning red, his movements shy and loving.

 It isn’t long before he pulled away, releasing quick breathes, resting his forehead against Kyuhyun’s, his eyes closed as he settled himself, his cheeks burning red, Kyuhyun grinning like a fool, his eyes fluttering open to watch the pretty man pressed against him, his hand sliding over the curve of Yesung's waist to pull him closer, until they were once again chest to chest, a heavy leg going to throw over Yesung's own legs, his method of keeping him in place, Yesung still blushing red with closed eyes. Kyuhyun being the sneaky bastard he was, used Yesung's distraction to his own benefit, smothering the older man in feather light kisses, Yesung blushing even more. He was busy trying to get the shyness to recede. He felt weird saying words like that, though he knew it needed to be said. It came out muffled but he was sure Kyuhyun heard him. He was trying to comfort the younger man, to ensure he knew that he never had anything to worry about, to help him understand that he would never lose him. He felt awkward about it all but he was glad that he said it. He finally opened his eyes, catching sight of Kyuhyun’s silky hair as the younger tipped his head to kiss his jaw line, shivering a little at the sensation, Kyuhyun teasing all the way to his ear, nudging against his earlobe, before he whispered sincerely ‘I will’, pressing a kiss against the skin near the area, pulling back a little to smile at the blushing man, Yesung smiling at him shyly, a hand reaching upwards to caress Kyuhyun’s cheek, lips pressing a chaste kiss against Kyuhyun’s lips before Yesung pulled away with a smile.

“Alright that’s enough. Let me go” Yesung instructed, pulling his hands and body away from
Kyuhyun’s cheeks and trying to wiggle his body away. His heart had thumped enough and he still needed to ensure that Eunhyuk was not encouraging Siwon to do something ridiculous, and he really thought he could do with some separation at that point. His emotions had fluctuated thoroughly through the course of the exchanges and he thought that it was perhaps best that he permitted himself the opportunity to regain some of his balance. He had made interesting, upsetting discoveries and had opened up a line of thought that was hard to address. Even if he had mainly settled the matter with Kyuhyun, he still had a lot of work to do in that area. He would be better advised to clear his mind and centre his thoughts. The only way that was even remotely possible was to be away from Kyuhyun. When he was near the younger, it always ended with him wrapped up in his arms and being consumed by everlasting warmth and that blasted sweet fruity smell that robbed him of logical thought. Kyuhyun basically made him a bubbling idiot and as much as he enjoyed those moments spent in paradise, he also needed time to sort through his own thoughts and feelings. Aside from that, he was also aware that they had both disappeared almost an hour ago and was positive at some point the others would want to know why. He really didn’t want to explain to them that Kyuhyun was being a possessive idiot that insisted on attacking him and he was too taken with affection to leave his arms. He could see that story going down quite well. Heechul would love himself, he was sure. He blushed just at the thought of it. That was absolutely ridiculous really and it was true…..sigh.

Kyuhyun however was not following his logic it would seem, seeing no reason for Yesung to leave his arms at all. They had nothing else on for the evening and he was comfortable. He could see no reason to let him escape. The need to hold on to him was not as strong anymore, but he still desired the relative closeness. He was happy to have him in his arms, thrilled that he had gotten Yesung to not only say he belonged to him, but even a love confession. Even with that hateful vision, the day had turned out to be quite amazing for him, his mind no longer filled with images of someone else holding on to Yesung, instead replaced with memories of his own hands holding on to a small waist, soft lips moving against his own, a delicate nose sliding against his larger one, the taste of coffee on his tongue; he blushed crimson. They were happy precious memories, enough to displace any feeling of discomfort or anger, willing to hold on to them forever, to hold to the man in his arms forever. He was happy and it was simple as that. The idea of the enlistment issue pushed to the back of his mind, choosing to focus on his happy present rather than worry of a troublesome future. He was thrilled then and had no intention of letting go of that happiness. The warmth against him was perfect and the fragrance intoxicating. Why would he even think about letting Yesung leave him? That was not happening  if he could help it, childishly pulling Yesung closer, muttering a petulant ‘no’, shaking his head to indicate his displeasure at the idea, Yesung once more pressed against him, trapped like  a precious porcelain doll, delicate to the touch but too precious to release, the older man sighing , accompanied with a roll of the eyes.

“Come on Kyuhyun ah. Let me go. The others are probably wondering where we went” Yesung tried to reason with the child holding on to him so stubbornly, though he was not that hopeful, Kyuhyun being notorious for his stubbornness. He could just feel it would be one of those days in which he would be cooing at the cuteness, but desperate to deck the younger man. He really should have expected it though. Kyuhyun was a brat. He knew that Kyuhyun was feeling better, evidence by the defiant smirk he was wearing, now just choosing to be a brat rather than acting on strong emotion. He was back to just being his usual childish self. Yesung pushed at him with some strength, Kyuhyun laughing at his failure, in the optimum position to deny his requests and hold on to him for his selfish reasons, Yesung grumbling against his chest , not having enough room to speak without being muffled, pulled forward by Kyuhyun, who was now just messing with him. See? That was why he needed to leave him. The brat drove him crazy, the childish idiot.

“See? I told you we had to save Yesungie hyung” Donghae’s voice cut through the air, loud and excited, though no one was sure as to why he was so excited, either the fact that he was just proven right or amused by the scene before him, pulling Eunhyuk into the room. His voice however, causing various reactions, Kyuhyun grumbling and glaring, twisting his body to glare at Donghae something fierce, Yesung blushing burgundy, actually pushing against Kyuhyun’s chest with serious force, making it clear that he wanted to leave and nothing would stop him, flying out of Kyuhyun’s hold, which had weakened when he turned to glare at Donghae, Yesung looking embarrassed and sheepish, his voice caught in his throat, undecided if he was going to stutter a greeting or jump straight into an explanation.

 Donghae was the only one that didn’t realize that he should atleast be feeling awkward, Eunhyuk trying not to look at the men on the bed, his face wearing a small sheepish smile, trying to hold back Donghae from his progress forward into the room. It was hard as the door was not locked, nor was it even shut all the way, perhaps creaking open at some time, Kyuhyun had been a bit too distracted to ensure it was shut properly. Donghae always had the habit of entering Yesung's room without care once the door was not locked, so didn’t even think to be careful or mindful that he may be interrupting something, which to Eunhyuk, he clearly was. The first sight they saw when the door creaked forward was Yesung grumbling against Kyuhyun’s chest and the maknae laughing his head off, squishing the older man. Donghae had interpreted the action to be the maknae bullying his precious hyung , whilst Eunhyuk had instantly recognized it for what it was, the two caught in a mildly intimate moment, confirmed when Yesung looked ready to die from embarrassment and Kyuhyun looked slightly murderous. Eunhyuk had then tried his hardest to impede Donghae, but the idiot had powered ahead with childlike innocence, insisting that he needed to help his hyung. Eunhyuk trailed behind in awkwardness, too embarrassed to look at either one of them.

He had known it would be something like that the second Kyuhyun grabbed hold of Yesung in the foyer. He had seen the look on the maknae’s face and from his own observations and recollections, it was clear to him atleast, that Kyuhyun was not in a good mood and had planned on dealing with those matters. It didn’t take a genius to guess what Kyuhyun would have had in mind, Eunhyuk feeling Kyuhyun’s icy glare since the party itself. At the time he just wanted to mess with Kyuhyun and play with his hyung. He and Yesung had once more regained some of their closeness and he had been having fun playing with him recently. They had formed a great team and when the opportunity arose to he was anxious to play with his hyung. At the time he was too caught with the screams and the emotion of the event to think about just exactly how much danger he had put himself in. Kyuhyun’s mood was fine once he was with Yesung but after the card kissing game, it had shifted. It was not especially visible but by the time they were on headed to the dorms, he knew that he was in trouble and by extension so was Yesung.

When Kyuhyun pulled his hyung away he figured that he wanted to deal with it and was kind enough to keep Donghae and Siwon occupied for him. Donghae’s patience seemed spent however when he asked for Yesung for the 10^th time and Eunhyuk said he was talking to Kyuhyun. He should have known that Donghae would interpret that to mean Kyuhyun was trying to steal his hyung from him and dash towards the room. Eunhyuk took off behind him, insisting that they were fine, having a fair idea what they could be up to, but Donghae would only insist that Kyuhyun could be killing his hyung. Eunhyuk was actually sort of glad that they were both presentable not in some weird display of affection, but also knew Kyuhyun would have their hides for interrupting him. He once more tried to stop Donghae but it was much too late, the younger man barrelling towards the bed.

Donghae in no time was throwing himself on Kyuhyun, childishly sitting on the younger man, forcing him on to his back, Kyuhyun grumbling but not doing anything to push Donghae off, Eunhyuk sure it was only because he didn’t want to chance hurting Donghae, both aware that Yesung would kill Kyuhyun if that happened and Kyuhyun himself was always very fond of Donghae and as such was not willing to hurt him, Hae bouncing up and down on Kyuhyun’s back with glee, laughing happily, Yesung pulling himself into a sitting position, laughing as well.

“You came just in time Hae ah. He refused to let me go” Yesung complained with a giggle, his cheeks burning red, though grateful that Donghae didn’t seem to think anything untoward about what he managed to walk in on. It wasn’t anything especially awkward or embarrassing but Yesung still sort off felt shy about the whole thing. Kyuhyun was basically just hugging him and teasing, common things, much different from the kisses from earlier. Atleast it was not then, positive he would have died if that happened. He was happy that Donghae was too innocent or too oblivious to make the right conclusions in that regard and in fact he was just happy to see him. Donghae was so playful and was punishing Kyuhyun for him, how could he not be happy, wrapping his arms over Donghae’s shoulder’s, back hugging Donghae, who was still sitting on Kyuhyun, who was insisting that Donghae get off of him, glaring at both Hae and Yesung, both laughing at his expense.

“Quit complaining maknae. That is what you get for holding Yesung hyung hostage” Donghae taunted playfully, smacking Kyuhyun’s cheeks, the younger flaming mad at the action, but settling into low difficult laughs as he made all his threats to destroy Donghae, who just pressed his weight down on him, Kyuhyun whining in pain, but all parties being aware that he was exaggerating, Donghae smacking him again, as he bounced a couple more times. Kyuhyun seemingly tired of being bullied by the two, reached outwards grabbing onto Yesung's thigh, the older man shrieking from surprise, Kyuhyun pinching his skin, laughing meanly as Yesung batted his hand away, pulling Donghae down with him as he pulled away, the younger man falling in a heap on top of Kyuhyun and Yesung, the oldest man’s hands still wrapped around Donghae’s shoulders, making them a pile of men squishing each other. Kyuhyun used that as an opportunity to pull himself out from under Donghae, smirking evilly as he picked up the pillow, whacking Donghae in the face, who yelled bloody murder. Yesung wanting to protect his dongsaeng, stretched forward to grab his own abandoned pillow, using it to smack Kyuhyun on the arm, the younger turning to glare at him instantly, Yesung grinning at him before he whacked him on the head, Kyuhyun lunging for him, Donghae however running interception, grabbing Kyuhyun before he could reach Yesung, holding him around the waist, the bed turning into a heap of bodies, and a small battlefield, Yesung whacking Kyuhyun with the pillow whilst Donghae restrained him.

“Hyukkie help us” Donghae commanded from the bed, trying his best to stop Kyuhyun from pouncing on Yesung, Kyuhyun’s hip bones digging into his chest, his breath heavy, though he could admit he was having a good time, Yesung giggling happily from the area somewhere above him, Kyuhyun grumbling threats nonstop but the smile was prominent on his face. Kyuhyun was annoyed that they were interrupted but he had always found it difficult to be mad at Donghae for any length of time. He knew at some point Yesung would have made him release him, so he could not really hold a grudge, actually sort of shy that Donghae walked in on them like that. It wasn’t anything too scarring but it ensured that he would remember to lock the door for later occasions. He had no particular intentions, but it was always better to be safe than sorry, as it was always better to deal with Donghae before he got too excited, like he was then laughing nonstop, automatically meaning that there would be no way  he would get Donghae to stop. He had resigned himself to spending the rest of the evening playing with Donghae, using it as an opportunity to show Yesung that he was not selfish, just a bit particular…that was it …particular.

“I am not getting involved with that mess” Eunhyuk rejected the offer to join the little fight, aware that Yesung's bed was much too small to have all of three of them on it, positive that Kyuhyun was kneeing Donghae somewhere on his thigh, just barely missing the groin and Yesung would pull his back before the day was finished, especially with him reaching over Donghae and Kyuhyun’s upper body to smack Kyuhyun a few times and then dodging Kyuhyun’s reaching hands. It was already more than crowded enough and if he were to be honest he was a little weary of Kyuhyun. The maknae seemed to be enjoying the little tussle but he was a little weird when it came to Yesung. He knew already that Kyuhyun was not pleased with the way the both of them interacted at the party and didn’t want to provoke him further. The choice was taken out of his hands however when Donghae threw Yesung's plushie at him, indicating that if he was not part of the battle, he was an enemy, Kyuhyun laughing when it hit him in the face, losing his balance and stumbling backwards a bit, all three of them laughing at his expense. The annoyance he felt then, enough to forget that he was weary of Kyuhyun, grabbing the plushie from the floor and heading for the bed, whacking all three of them in succession, pleased when they stopped laughing. Only then did he realize that was not necessarily a good thing, all three turning their attention on him, attacking him, Donghae grabbing hold of him whilst the other two smacked him about  the body, Eunhyuk grumbling and yelling some rather colourful language which made Yesung smack him for his bad conduct as well.

It was unfortunate that the yelling, especially the cursing, drew Siwon’s attentions, the muscled man stumbling into the room, his eyes going wide as he took in the scene before him, Donghae grabbing hold of Eunhyuk’s waist, face buried against his stomach, whilst his legs were tangled oddly with Kyuhyun’s, Yesung practically lying on Kyuhyun to reach Eunhyuk who was splayed awkwardly on and off the bed, hand’s bracing from the impact, Kyuhyun’s hand wrapped around his arms, pulling him closer. It was not something intimate exactly, but it was not normal either, not even for Super Junior, the bed being much too small to accommodate all four of them, Kyuhyun looking as if he would be squished, Yesung, much too Siwon’s relief, the man at the top of the emerging pile, and not at the bottom where he could be hurt. They didn’t seem to notice him right away, only doing so when Kyuhyun looked up, the younger man grunting , Yesung then calling a sweet ‘Siwon ah’.

“Do I even want to know what’s going on?” Siwon asked with a lifted eyebrow, the men in the room all laughing at his question, wondering how on earth they could even begin to explain what they were doing. They were men in their mid twenties and they were having a pillow fight, and having not an ounce of shame at all. Siwon chuckled along with them, making his way over to the bed, by passing Eunhyuk who was stretching a hand out to him, trying to get back to a seated position, Siwon ignoring him, instead walking further to get to Yesung, reaching a hand for the older man to take. Yesung complied grabbing hold of Siwon’s hand or rather his fingers, Yesung's hands being much smaller than Siwon’s, Kyuhyun playing close attention towards the interaction, Siwon pulling Yesung upwards, free hand pushing Donghae out of the way, so that Yesung could step away from the tangled mess, helping him find his footing on the ground, Siwon smiling at him.

“Come watch a movie with me Hyung. I don’t think I will have much time later” Siwon suggested to Yesung, ignoring the others in the room virtually, all of whom made it quite clear that they were listening in, Eunhyuk watching the two of them then Kyuhyun, wondering if Kyuhyun would finally snap. The day must have been hell for him. He was surprised to see Kyuhyun just roll his eyes and mumble something about Siwon being a clingy bastard, but did not react in any way to indicate that he was upset significantly. Eunhyuk turned back to see Yesung nodding enthusiastically  at Siwon, who smiled happily, a hand reaching around to hold him close to him, Eunhyuk once more glancing at Kyuhyun, who glared at the hand but said nothing, only pulling himself into a sitting position. Eunhyuk realized that Kyuhyun was watching was turning into a bad habit, but it was shocking that he was not reacting more vocally.

“Come on guys, we are going to watch a movie” Yesung invited with a bit of excitement, leaving Siwon’s hold to help pull Donghae off the bed, a hand going around Donghae’s shoulder as he pulled at his cheeks, nodding at Siwon as he left. Eunhyuk was finally able to pull himself upright, but was much too busy observing Siwon and Kyuhyun to do so. When Yesung invited everyone, Siwon’s smile faltered a little, clear that he just wanted to be with Yesung , but soon returned, seemingly accepting Yesung's actions, though he looked a lot less pleased with himself, following after Yesung and Donghae who were already discussing what they wanted to watch. Kyuhyun though, was the interesting one. He didn’t even glare when Yesung agreed, just a shake of the head and a soft smile, turning into a smirk when Yesung abandoned Siwon and invited them all. Eunhyuk realized that Kyuhyun had expected him to do that all along, so only laughed at Siwon’s misfortune. They were definitely interesting he decided when he pulled himself finally into a better position.

“Come on Eunhyukkie hyung” Kyuhyun encouraged, stretching a hand for Eunhyuk, holding on the elder’s hand as he helped him up, Eunhyuk looking at him with a bit of hesitancy, Kyuhyun only chuckling low in his throat, a hand reaching across Eunhyuk shoulder when he was finally standing, both walking towards the door,  “let’s go watch a movie” -Eunhyuk feeling comfortable, Kyuhyun seemingly bearing no grudge, for which he was grateful for.

♥규성♥

Two hours later, found Kyuhyun watching the  large television as he petted Yesung's hair, the older man half way asleep on his lap, legs spread over Donghae who was asleep on the couch next to them, body spread comically, a hand holding Yesung's feet in place, mouth slightly open as it rested against the back of the couch, Eunhyuk fighting sleep the couch over, propped up on one hand, eyelids closing ever so often, only to be forced open and a loud large yawn escaping. Kyuhyun watched them all and shook his head, wondering why he was so unfortunate as to be cursed to send time with such ridiculous hyungdeul. He loved them to death, each and every one of the them, one more so than others, but they were idiots, Kyuhyun shaking his head at them in disapproval, but the smile refused to leave his face, eyes darting down to trace the movements of his fingers through Yesung's hair.

After the first movie finished, Siwon informed that he had to leave, having a shooting schedule in the morning he had to prepare for and he couldn’t stay any longer, Yesung wishing him well and insisting that he call him, Kyuhyun trying not to grumble from the spot beside him, having sat next to Yesung and Siwon when they arrived at the living room originally, Siwon ensuring that Yesung tilted towards him, hand wrapped around the older man’s shoulder. Kyuhyun had visions of red but was mindful after his earlier conduct not to prove to Yesung he was a childish, taking deep breathes and sliding in beside Yesung. He keep a close watch on the hand, a little more tolerant when Siwon did not try anything funny, just letting Yesung rest against him. The action ensured that Yesung had to be seated close to Siwon, which annoyed Kyuhyun, but he was striving for better conduct, just staying close to the older man.  Kyuhyun though, being his usual vindictive self, ensured that he always stole Yesung's intention with all sorts of ridiculous things, just to piss Siwon off. The calm man however only rolling his eyes at Kyuhyun’s childishness, not commenting on it. Donghae however thought it fit to do so, pointing out that if Kyuhyun had all those little complaints he was free to return to his room, Kyuhyun glaring at him, which in turn made Yesung glare at Kyuhyun, which resulted in a well behaved Kyuhyun thereafter, Donghae smirking, definitely not as innocent as he seemed. 

When Siwon left, Kyuhyun had suggested that it was late and that they all go to bed, thinking it was a good opportunity to return to his favourite past time, snuggling with Yesung, but they all rejected insisting they wanted to watch another movie.  Kyuhyun however was against the idea, positive that they would not make it through another film, all of them looking tired. Being the stubborn idiot that he always was, Yesung insisted on watching another movie, Donghae agreeing with him, taking up the spot Siwon had vacated. Kyuhyun had no choice but to accept the demands, Eunhyuk just shrugging, not caring to get involved with the argument. Not even half hour later however, Yesung was lying on his lap half way asleep, and Donghae was all but dead to the world. The only reason he was still sitting there was because every time he tried to make him leave, Yesung would insist that he was awake and wanted to watch the movie. Kyuhyun was ready to drag him to bed, but decided to just let it be. He had nothing to lose at that point. After Siwon had left Yesung had naturally gravitated towards him, easily stretching on him when he felt sleepy, Donghae pulling his legs onto his lap to make Yesung comfortable. Kyuhyun was close to Yesung, so he was by default happy. Sooner or later, Yesung would be unable to fight the sleep and then he would take him to bed, till then he didn’t mind the wait.

He instead occupied his time gazing at the older, half way asleep older man, his mind comforted by his closeness, fingers continuing their rhythm as he tried to arrange his thoughts. He had a long day, one filled with endless conflicting emotions. He was regretful in some instances, he was embarrassed due to others, he was weary and afraid at the thought of some, annoyed with others and thrilled due to some. It was a classic day with Yesung to be honest; the only emotion always constant during days like those was happiness, the same happiness he felt to have Yesung so close, or to be able to hold him in his arms. It was a long stressful day, one filled with many discovered and things to think about, only made easier by the man in his arms. He gazed at him, the only thought being the beauty that was against him, the level of love he felt in his heart, the endless need to have Yesung be his. He would always be filled with so much once Yesung was beside him. He smiled at the thought. A life of endless craziness, Yesung bring with  him so many emotions and compulsions, the stubborn bastard! His life would always be a crazy adventure with Yesung. He wouldn’t have it any other way he decided.

‘Why are you so stubborn?’ mumbled nearly inaudibly as he returned to examining the features before him, wondering how on earth it was possible for one person to be so gorgeous yet so damned stubborn? He  told him that he should sleep, yet the idiot insisted on watching the movie even when he is practically asleep? He needed strangling really. Kyuhyun couldn’t do that though. The stubborn idiot was perfect and even more importantly was someone that Kyuhyun loved with his whole heart. He was someone that loved Kyuhyun,  a perfect person that was his. Kyuhyun smiled like a fool.

 ‘I am not stubborn’  Yesung grunted as he shifted, smacking Kyuhyun on the stomach, glaring at him for the phrase used, twisting back to the television, once again forcing himself to pretend he was not half way asleep, Kyuhyun laughing happily. Not just quiet chuckles either but loud laughter, Yesung getting mad and elbowing him in the stomach for laughing at him, keeping his eyes on the screen as if he hadn’t done anything.

It wasn’t five minutes later and Yesung was asleep on his lap once more, Kyuhyun back to his hair and caressing his face, just thrilled to be there in that moment.  He had postponed the moving Yesung bit of his plan for a little while, just very taken with gazing at the man, resting against him. He hadn’t done that in a little while, and whilst it was pretty creepy, Yesung was just too stunning not to observe, like some sort of doll, smooth wonderful skin and perfect sculpted features. He just wanted to look at him. With the army issue a real consideration, he didn’t know how much longer he would be able to do things like that, intent to enjoy every second of it, wanting to memorize the little shivers he would make when Kyuhyun touched his skin as he slept. Kyuhyun was sure then that he would do anything to hold on to Yesung, never wanting anyone else to gaze upon perfection, positive that the sight of anyone else touching Yesung would make him sick to the stomach. He was also aware however that he couldn’t continue to behave that way if he wanted to show Yesung he was a mature individual as well. His actions were much too rough. He was lucky Yesung was not mad at him, promising himself that he would find a way to have more control in the future. Kyuhyun continued to gaze at the sleeping man, not even turning away when Donghae snorted in his sleep, the image much too compelling. Despite his trying day, Kyuhyun was happy he decided. As his fingers through the soft hair and the light breathing of Yesung's slumbering made its way to his ear, he decided he couldn’t be anything but happy and grateful.

Yesung was beside him, Yesung was his, and the world was perfect.

Author’s Notes:

1. Much gratitude goes out to my wonderful amazing Unnie, thursday, who put up with my crying and whining. She worked very hard to get this *waves hand around* whatever this was, to some sort of standard. Thank you Unnie! Seriously, do check out her work. I am often envious.
2. I am still deciding if I wish to continue posting these stories. I have one I am half way through writing and since I don’t like odd numbers, that leaves only two left…. I think.
3. Thanks to everyone who have taken the time to comment and subscribe. I have always appreciated every one of you.

Cheers ♥

Kyusung ♥

Some of the gifs I considered for the heading picture ♥