You Are Mine

Chapter 1

Perhaps if Yesung was more observant, he would have realized that he had reason to be concerned, or atleast be conscious of his wellbeing. Unfortunately however, he often lacked the necessary ability to determine these things based on his environment. It was a shortcoming that often led to stress on his part, ing him into situations that a little bit of foresight would have greatly prevented or atleast made better. Yesung was unlucky; or rather he was just oblivious. When he slid into the seat next to Kyuhyun, a happy smile adorning his face, the adrenaline pumping in his blood from the happiness bubbling in his heart, still hearing the fans chants and screams ringing in his ear, a sound that he never wanted to dissipate, not even once, he should have known something was wrong, but in true oblivious Yesung fashion, he didn’t. All his mind could focus on was their seventh anniversary. Seven years was a long time. A really long time if you are an idol band in South Korea anyway.

If he was ever granted the opportunity to travel in time to greet his fourteen year old self, he would stand before that young unsure awkward child and promise him that he would have a bright future, that one day he would stand on a massive stages throughout the world, with twelve men that he loved like brothers and listen to the screams of sheer glee from thousands of people that loved him and wished him happiness. He was sure if he had uttered those words to his younger self, the kid would have asked him if he was drinking and wanted him to get his mother to call someone for him. He was positive his younger self would never believe him. Hell! Even after seven years, he didn’t believe it. He didn’t believe that he had actually attained heaven on earth.

Coming from a small town in the forgotten countryside of the small country, he never thought one day he would be on cover of the New York Times Entertainment Paper. Never once thought that he would globe trot throughout the world, doing the very thing he loved. He was an awkward average looking kid from a small town. He didn’t even dream of things he achieved…No! The things they achieved. He didn’t do it alone. He did it with some of the most amazing people on the face of the earth. He was even more grateful for that fact.

His time with Super Junior was special. He had spent it with truly brilliant men that he would hold in his heart proudly. They were his strength and his hope, the water that sustained his life, the air he consumed, that powered his existence. His emotion was strong then. Sitting in a crowded dorm with so many other talented people, better looking people, guys that were smart and suave and handsome, he didn’t have much hope to be honest. He was far from home and he was tired and he was stressed, school pounding down his back, training he could barely find the strength for, the knowledge that his coordination was next to nonexistent and a disapproving father waiting to say I told you so. All he had then was his rare precious voice and his teammates.

 A soft pat on the back or the cute whine of “hyung” meant a lot then. It meant he was not alone, that he had people that were just like him, trying just as hard as he was, failing just as miserably. They gave each other strength in those dark days and continued to do so even after they stood at the peaks of the glory. Sitting beside them, all of them , even the ones that weren’t there then, gave him a feeling of joy that was hard to explain. Super Junior had given him many things he came to realize. It had given him his greatest treasure. He loved his fans and his colleagues and his brothers but it was something so much more, something that he would never be able to thank the heaven enough for. It had given him true love, true perfection, the other piece of his soul. Kyuhyun was there beside him and he was floating. On the day they celebrated seven glorious years of happiness, sadness, sweat, blood and tears, gold and glory, he couldn’t help but be taken with it all. He would have been written off as a lunatic by his fourteen year old self, justifiably so to be honest, now he was everything he could ever hope to be, completed and fulfilled in the most precious ways. It was hard to focus on anything else in moments like that to be truthful.

He would like to think that was the reason he missed Kyuhyun’s peculiar mood. He was not that out of mind however, noting that Kyuhyun looked a bit sour when he slid in next to him. His attention however was stolen by the fans that lined the way out, the amazing people that allowed him to stand before them and pour his heart out, the people that soothed him and made his dreams and his hopes possible. He owed them a debt that could never be repaid. There was nothing he could do that would ever be sufficient to return the joy they had given him. All he could do was lend them his voice and try to make them happy. He therefore had no qualms about forgoing his questioning of Kyuhyun, to stick his head out and greet those people that waited to see him, that came to celebrate with them. He owed them that much didn’t he? Kyuhyun seemed to agree, sliding down his own window to do the same, Yesung smiling at the fans, smiling at Kyuhyun, positive that the younger must have had similar sentiment, similar to the others as well, everyone doing what they could to show their gratitude.

The whole event had been an emotional rush. The days before identified with moments spent just reminiscing of the days gone by, the things they never thought possible, yet had long achieved. Not just the awards and the stages, but the general feeling of happiness and fulfilment. They had great memories now, new hopes and greater aspirations, still looking back at their bitter days in limbo. Truthfully some of them knew of those things better than others, Kyuhyun being fortunate enough to never have had such experiences, Yesung grateful for that fact. It was generally a very emotional time for them all, the memories and the sorrow, mingled with the joy and the hope for the future. Throw in the enlistment of their leader and well….. Yesung thinks he was honestly entitled to his right to rest his head against the headrest and close his eyes, letting the memories spread through him and allowing his heart to cherish what it could. Kyuhyun would be alright, he was sure. This was view given support when Kyuhyun did the same.

He was convinced that Kyuhyun, just like himself, was processing the emotions of the day, letting the memories wash over him and touch his heart. Yesung didn’t think anything was especially untoward in the least, stretching his hand out to hold on to Kyuhyun, smiling at the younger man, who took hold of his hand[ a lot firmer than usual, Yesung did not comment] as well, both offering weak smiles at each other. Yesung wanted Kyuhyun to be part of that as well, to take his rightful place in Yesung's most cherished memories.  Kyuhyun’s grip was tight and unrelenting, but Yesung paid no heed, instead with one last weak smile, he closed his eyes and let his body relax, drawing down from the emotional highs of the day, Kyuhyun being oddly quiet beside him. Yesung was ashamed to admit that he was just too lazy to open his eyes. Kyuhyun was fine or so he tried to convince himself. However, if he was little less lackadaisical he would have been informed that the younger man beside him was far from the relaxed disposition he assumed him to be in, stewing in subdued rage beside him.

Kyuhyun’s skin burned red and his eyes seem to exude fire, the annoyance and ill will bubbling in the dark depths, a scene replaying in his mind mocking him in the filthiest ways. He took a deep breath, tightening the hold he had on the small delicate hand, the infuriating man beside him seemingly resting. Kyuhyun could punch him in the face, for so many reasons. Then he could hit him just for being so cute when Kyuhyun was suffering. Kyuhyun sighed then. It would be one of those days. Kyuhyun could just tell. His insides churning with every possible emotion, a tempest he couldn’t control, so very tempted to reach across and grab the resting man….So bad, that he had to pin his hand at his sides. It wasn’t the time. He would get killed. I was just so hard though. He was positive he was dying, the annoyance not taking kindly to the delay, to the fact that he was compelled to wait. Asking a man with no patience to wait, whilst his annoyance ran rampant. Yep. That was a good idea. Sigh.

When the car pulled to a stop, Yesung opened his eyes, raising his free hand to cutely wipe the sleep away from his eyes, smiling to himself, his good mood persisting. He should have known he would fall asleep, the feelings of the day much too strong for him to endure, the level of affection rushing through his body for everything and anyone, the feeling of accomplishment and success, mingled with that bit of sadness that tainted the event. Leeteuk would be leaving him some, leaving them soon. It was a hard realization for him to endure. Obviously he knew that Leeteuk would be going to the army, just as he knew he would be going at some point as well, but it all just seemed so very real now. Leeteuk just had a matter of days left and he had a few months at best. It wouldn’t be long then. He looked to his left, seeing Kyuhyun gathering his bag and water bottle, whilst trying to hold on to his hand, a small sad smile playing on Yesung’s lips.

 He wasn’t ready. He couldn’t leave Kyuhyun as yet. He had to though. One way or the other he would have to find the strength to do so. He smiled at the younger, a much brighter iteration of the beautiful thing, who didn’t smile back, busy pulling his bag onto his shoulder, eventually turning to look at Yesung, his expression difficult to comprehend. Yesung was not exactly sure where the intensity in his eyes came from, instead choosing to smile fondly at him, again the gesture not returned, Yesung shrugging his shoulders, assuming  that Kyuhyun was tired or just moody. It happened from time to time, so he was not especially concerned to be honest.  He was also not especially concerned when Kyuhyun tugged on his hand firmly, indicating that he expected Yesung to slide out of the car with him as well. Yesung saw no reason to refuse, doing so easily, pulling his bag along with him. Kyuhyun’s grip on his hand a little too firm for his liking but he tolerated it assuming that Kyuhyun was unaware.

Upon exit he was greeted by the others, Donghae sliding out of the front seat, smiling at him warmly, Eunhyuk and Siwon walking up beside them, all chatting amiably, Eunhyuk trying to convince Siwon that it was a good idea to piggyback him to the upper dorms using the stairs, as a show of his superiority, Leeteuk rolling his eyes as it seemed likely that Siwon would be taken advantage off, due to his inability to be told of something he couldn’t do. Siwon seemed ready to accept, which prompted Yesung to intervene, rushing forward to clamp a hand on Siwon’s back to tell him he was being an idiot, stuck when Kyuhyun refused to release the limb, Yesung tugging at it, feeling rather embarrassed and shy at the possibility of someone pointing it out, trying to catch Kyuhyun’s eyes, which the younger was averting, pretending he did not feel Yesung trying for a release. Kyuhyun was odd today he decided.

 He didn’t let that stop him however, intent on protecting Siwon from himself. Taking a quick step forward, Yesung slipped an arm onto Siwon’s bicep, the arguing man turning to look at him and Kyuhyun by extension, who was dragged along by the motion. Kyuhyun glared at him as to be expected; Siwon  smiled at him as he always did and looked down to see his hyung smiling at him with fondness. Yesung cutely insisted that Siwon should not listen to a word Eunhyuk said, Eunhyuk naturally arguing that Yesung was ruining his fun and should go away. Siwon would hear nothing of that, wrapping his arm with Yesung's, the three…well four of them walking along to the elevator at a leisurely pace, Kyuhyun glaring at all and sundry, face red from the emotion he concealed, unnoticed by Yesung, who was busy arguing with Eunhyuk over Siwon, who was also rather occupied with his insistence that he was more than capable of doing anything.

Yesung was rather annoyed that Siwon was not listening to him, releasing the hand he held on to, to smack Siwon across the chest, Kyuhyun’s eyes widening at the action, something green and scary and all consuming springing to life. It took all his will power not to strangle Yesung then, to not say something mean and bitter and for the life of him, he didn’t understand how he wasn’t incinerating anyone, especially since his eyes burned with the fires of hell. He took a deep breath. He would be okay. He would be okay. Just a little again. He could do it. It was just a few more steps, he repeated like a mantra, his hand tightening once again, Yesung tugging his hand away, turning finally to look at him with a grimace, silently asking him to let go. Kyuhyun refused to comply, but released his hold a little, aware that he was never really capable of hurting Yesung, his fingers loosening a bit to give Yesung some breathing room. The older man tugged a few more times but realized that Kyuhyun would not be releasing the hand, so had no choice but to let him continue. Kyuhyun was definitely being odd, but at that moment he had more pressing matters, like explaining to Siwon that Eunhyuk was an idiot that he should ignore. He allowed the joint hand to go as is, turning back to argue with Eunhyuk once more, who was laughing his head off, insisting that Siwon was a fool to even consider it. Yesung was in agreement, but Siwon was being rather pouty, so had to alter his response to appease the younger man, going to great lengths to assure his dongsaeng that he was not an idiot, internally cooing at the cuteness of the tall man.

 They all piled into the elevator, Yesung releasing his hold on Siwon’s arm to permit the creation of space that would let Leeteuk and whoever else that could fit into the elevator, trying to make himself small, therefore not complaining when Kyuhyun silently pulled him against his chest, feeling slightly embarrassed but aware that it was done with a practical purpose, looking up to smile at the younger man, who oddly enough glared at him. Yesung titled his head to the side, looking at Kyuhyun with cute questioning eyes, the younger man pulling his eyes away in a rush, staring at the wall opposite, his jaw set in stone, Yesung tempted to reach a hand out to him but refrained. Kyuhyun was clearly not in a good mood. He wondered briefly why that would be so. It was a good happy day. Was Kyuhyun upset that it wasn’t his 7^th anniversary? He knew Kyuhyun joined later, but that day was always celebrated by them all. He hoped Kyuhyun knew that it was meant for him as well. He had shared everything with them. After so long, he hoped Kyuhyun still didn’t think he wasn’t supposed to celebrate something like that, that he didn’t deserve to. He made a mental note to talk to Kyuhyun about it later. He had to ensure that Kyuhyun was alright. He smiled at him once more, tightening the grip on their joint hands of his own accord, wanting to assure Kyuhyun that he was beside him then. The younger man however, choosing not to say a word, only acknowledging the action with a tightening of his own fingers.

Yesung was however once more distracted by Siwon’s whining, drawing his attention away from Kyuhyun to reprimand Eunhyuk for messing with their resident movie star, Siwon childishly insisting that he only had Yesung to protect him, making the older man blush and Eunhyuk to mock barf, Donghae smacking him on the back thinking he was coughing, making them all laugh as Eunhyuk choked on his own spit, Donghae frantically apologizing for his action, continuing to do so for the duration of the short ride.

When the elevator finally reached  the 11^th floor, Yesung, Kyuhyun, Siwon and Eunhyuk all disembarking, waving to Leeteuk and a manager who left for the 12^th floor. The other elevator beside theirs opening with a ding, revealing the other members that could not fit in the first, Sungmin the only one exiting, done so with a cute wave to Kangin and Ryeowook. Sungmin soon joined them, all beginning the trek to their doorway, Sungmin teasing that they had some stray-aways, looking at Donghae and Siwon, who only shrugged. Eunhyuk however, indicating that they were like parasites that wouldn’t leave him alone. Yesung smacked him at the back of the head, making the others, including Kyuhyun, laugh at his expense, the lead dancer of Super Junior grumbling that Yesung was mean and only liked to protect the big oaf, nodding his head at Siwon, whose eyes widened at the accusation, though it soon turned to a smile. To indicate that he had no qualms with the statement Siwon had attached his arm to Yesung's free hand, stating that Eunhyuk was just jealous that his Yesungie loved him and wanted his presence, whilst no one wanted to play with Eunhyuk, who only grumbled as the others laughed, Siwon smiling down at Yesung with fondness. The others excluding Kyuhyun that is, who only rolled his eyes with a hump that went unheard, internally wondering which the idiot that told Siwon he was cute, only to realize that he was in love with that said idiot, confirmed when Yesung cooed at Siwon for being so ‘adorable’. There was nothing adorable about Siwon. When would Yesung learn that? Kyuhyun however decided to keep his comments to himself, positive it would be like rousing a sleeping dragon. He just had to hold on just a little bit and then he would deal with Yesung. Just a little bit again.

He could endure, he chanted internally, pushing down to urge to just grab Yesung away from Siwon and run far away from everyone, to go somewhere where they would never be found, where it would just be the two of them alone and Yesung would never let anyone else be near him!!! Yeah…he was in a bad place he decided, releasing a breathe as he tried to sort through the anger and indignation and all the other conflicting emotions that seemed to think his head was a playground to run around in, just like Yesung seemed to think it was alright to let everyone else touch him, like he seemed to think it was appropriate to be so attached to his dongsaengs when Kyuhyun was clearly in need of his presence. Why won’t you stop?!!! Again, he took a breath. He needed to be calm….yes…calm was good. His eyes darkened. Just a minute again He would give Yesung a minute before he dealt with him appropriately he promised himself, glaring at them all, not even Sungmin spared as he was the one that provoked the reaction in the first place.

Kyuhyun was never so grateful to hear a door open, pulling ahead of the others to enter first, grabbing Yesung along with him, kicking his shoes off his feet, not caring to put them back in place. Yesung was surprised by his swiftness and ill conduct, and as such looked at him with confusion, before he proceeded to remove his own shoes. Instead of hustling like Kyuhyun had done, he insisted on taking his time to take off his shoes, grating on Kyuhyun’s nerves, who by then could only stand and watch him, the others entering behind Yesung, still chatting with each other, thankfully not paying that much attention. Yesung needed to hurry. Kyuhyun wanted to do it as silently as possible and that meant catching Yesung off guard and not being seen by the others. He just knew Siwon would do something to stop him and he would definitely deck him. His current mood was a definite cause of concern in that regard. He was permanently tempted to punch Siwon in the face for touching his property and if the older man impeded his purpose he would definitely kill him, positive that he would not be able to even muster some remorse. It was much better to avoid Siwon and Eunhyuk and Donghae…just all of Yesung's dongsaengs to be honest.

His patience was wearing thin, thankful that Yesung seemed to be finished, reaching out to place his shoes on the rack, Kyuhyun however not giving him the opportunity at all to do it. Kyuhyun instead tugging on his hands forcefully, ensuring he was pulled into a standing position and situated behind him, pulling Yesung along with him, the older man wearing a look of confusion, trying to impede Kyuhyun’s movement. He tried turning to say something to the others, but failed to do so with the speed at which Kyuhyun was moving, brisk steps by passing the living room, past the kitchen and down the short hallway into Yesung's bedroom, the older man making soft inquiries and tugging on his arm, all of which Kyuhyun ignored. Kyuhyun didn’t want to speak then, positive he would more than likely hurt Yesung with his bitter words. He didn’t want to hurt him, but for the life of him he didn’t know how to deal with all the anger and annoyance and suffering he felt. He thinks his insides are on fire and his heart hurt something fierce, feeling this surge of anger and indignation that was indescribable. It was consuming and scary and he was lost. Yesung had to be in his arms for it to subside. That was all he knew.

Yesung was concerned, significantly so. Kyuhyun was acting very strange. Whilst he knew that odd was not always a bad thing, at the same time the younger was starting to get on his nerves a little. Kyuhyun was dragging him along as if he was some sort of rag doll that Kyuhyun could do as he pleased with. That was not to say that the action was painful or anything like that, the grip on his hand was strong and firm but not of such a level to hurt. Kyuhyun was always careful in that regard, he would give him that, but his conduct in that moment left a lot to be desired. He was tugging on the hand leading him but the brat refused to release him. Didn’t Kyuhyun realize how rude it was to just leave everyone like that? He hadn’t even finished his conversation with Siwon. He really wanted to talk to Siwon. His dongsaeng was rather busy at the moment, his new drama already in production. Siwon won’t have the time to do anything with him. He would miss him greatly and really wanted to spend time with him, plus he still had to smack Eunhyuk for teasing him and Siwon. He had a lot still left to do and Kyuhyun was just dragging him away with no concern for his own activities.

He wouldn’t have mind if Kyuhyun had something to say to him or if Kyuhyun simply said he wanted to talk to him. He even had the intention of talking to Kyuhyun at some point in the evening, aware that Kyuhyun was not in a good mood. It was clear from his disposition. He would have had no problem helping Kyuhyun in any way he could, what grated on his nerves however, was the absolute disregard the younger seemed to show to him, Kyuhyun not even once having the decency to answer his questions. He felt the annoyance rising but tried his best to understand Kyuhyun. Maybe whatever was plaguing the maknae’s mind was making it hard for him to deal with things appropriately. He was willing to give him the benefit of the doubt. He always found it hard to reprimand Kyuhyun as a general rule anyway and was once again unwilling to do so.

Yesung flinched a bit when Kyuhyun pushed the door open. The action was rough and angry but Yesung stayed quiet, trying his best to discern whatever it was that was making Kyuhyun act in such a manner. He was most definitely confused, trying to run through his mind any possibility that could have made Kyuhyun behave that way. He decided however that perhaps it would have been better to determine what exactly Kyuhyun was feeling. The younger was silent and broody, face firm and eyes unyielding. Was it anger? Yesung had rarely ever seen him angry, but from what he knew Kyuhyun was a lot more open about anger. Seriously! What on earth was wrong with the child?

He wanted to smack him so bad, for worrying and confusing him but refrained, Kyuhyun clearly not in the mood for him to stretch things. He was so tempted though, body reeling a little at the violence expressed by the younger man, the door rocking back on its hinges, making a creaking sound, Kyuhyun stalking into the room, dragging him along with him, turning as if on an axis, stretching a hand to firmly slam the door shut. Yesung thought he would lock it, but he didn’t; his actions jumpy and shaky. He did not look at Yesung, who unfortunately was pulled to the side when Kyuhyun turned to close the door, his hand jerking a bit roughly, but he refrained from complaining, instead focusing his eyes on Kyuhyun’s movement, the younger looking flustered and uncertain. If Yesung was to be honest, he would say slightly unhinged, but he never had the heart or the courage to say bad things about Kyuhyun, so was working hard to convince himself that Kyuhyun was just flustered and not deranged. It was a hard swallow but he would make it work, still trying to think about what could have caused Kyuhyun’s current mood. It was an odd feeling honestly, trapped in a shock state and not knowing what to do with Kyuhyun.

When Kyuhyun finally turned to look at him, Yesung gasped a little. Kyuhyun’s jaw was set in a thin line, as if it was carved from stone and remained just as still, his lip drawn into a thin line, showing no amusement, eyes wide and still, scary if Yesung were to disclose his true thoughts upon looking at Kyuhyun. The younger’s eyes red and sort of blood shot, cause of the redness honestly unknown, a whirl pool of emotions that Yesung couldn’t begin to identify, his own heart thumping in his chest. He doesn’t remember ever seeing Kyuhyun look like that. It wasn’t sadness or anger or indignation or confusion, but some weird mix of all four and so many more. It was strange seeing him like that, the aura the younger extending dark and frightening, Kyuhyun eyes bearing into his soul, strong and unyielding, Yesung for once the weaker one in such a  contest, drawing his eyes away, a soft blushing tainting his face, the silence awkward and oppressive. Kyuhyun was staring at him creepily, as if Yesung were some sort of prey, his body rigid and forced, Yesung gathering his courage to look at Kyuhyun once more, trying to discern the younger’s mood and secrets, the iris of Kyuhyun’s eyes staring into him with strength, his face unmoving, eyes quickly becoming dazed, as if he had descended into a faraway place, Yesung's heart clawing at him.

Something was wrong with Kyuhyun and he didn’t know what to do.  He felt panicked for a second, unsure as to how to proceed. Kyuhyun looked dark and scary and he was slightly afraid. He doesn’t think Kyuhyun would hurt him. That was quite impossible, he trusted Kyuhyun more than he trusted himself sometimes, and knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that Kyuhyun would never hurt him, yet in that second it was hard to look at the man before him. Not with that stare and that firm jaw line. Yesung fidgeted a bit, feeling as if he was being judged by Kyuhyun, but decidedly unwilling to let the craziness continue.

“Kyuhyun ah, what’s wrong? Are you-“ Yesung questioned, voice soft and delicate, tainted with a bit of uncertainty. He didn’t know how he was supposed to speak to Kyuhyun then. It was an uncertainty he was unaccustomed to, but he was unwilling to let it deter him. No matter how weird Kyuhyun was being, the younger was his responsibility. He was compelled to take care of Kyuhyun, stepping forward tentatively to reach out to Kyuhyun. He wasn’t sure what was going on with Kyuhyun but he would solve it one way or the other. If he had to hold Kyuhyun in his arms and his hair for hours for him to speak to him he would do it. Whatever that was bothering Kyuhyun was his business and his responsibility. He would put himself out there to solve it. Kyuhyun was dark then and the look in the younger’s eyes made him shiver a little, but he would be strong for Kyuhyun. He couldn’t help wonder if Kyuhyun was mad because of him, but for the life of him couldn’t figure out what  he could have done to have pushed Kyuhyun to such a level. It was decidedly confusing.

Yesung's words however are interrupted midway, his eyes going wide and words dying in his throat when Kyuhyun moved, the action itself not unique but the intensity in which he did it was something he didn’t expected, shocking him. The man who was mainly stoic before, taking one giant step towards him, Yesung observing  him, trying to speak and smile at the same time, neither occurring, Kyuhyun standing before him in a split second, a hand reaching out swiftly to wrap around his waist, Yesung yelping at the force in which it was done, mouth open in surprise, Kyuhyun’s hand at his waist, pulling him towards him, Yesung taking the small step like a puppet, no thought or intention, just a reflex action, looking at Kyuhyun in confusion and that little bit of awe that his internal circuitry couldn’t seem to stop, as it tried to process what on earth was going on. The warmth from Kyuhyun’s hand was steeping through his clothes, Kyuhyun smart enough it seems to sneak his hand under his jacket, resting against the thin shirt, pulling him closer in a rush, Yesung much too mesmerized to impede Kyuhyun’s intention, his eyes looking at Kyuhyun with confusion, the younger silent and serious, his eyes only softening that little bit as he looked at him in the eye, though the intensity remained the same. Yesung wanted to ask him what was going on, but couldn’t seem to get his voice to work, Kyuhyun though didn’t look like he would be listening to him anyway, Yesung's cheeks tainted with red, blushing under Kyuhyun’s gaze, his heart thumping in his chest, feeling shy, everything happening so quickly. He didn’t know how long it took, but he was sure it was only a few heartbeats before Kyuhyun was leaning down, Yesung's heart coming to a stop.

The next heartbeat he felt, Kyuhyun’s lips were on his and it was breathtaking and strange, Kyuhyun’s body pressed to his impossibly close, his fingers finally releasing Yesung's hand, only to immediately shoot upwards to grab onto Yesung's hip, his fingers digging into the skin, dragging Yesung closer to him almost desperately. The whole action is rough. It’s not painful exactly; just different from the tenderness he is accustomed to from Kyuhyun. The hands holding on to him aren’t caressing his skin but instead they were clawing at him, marking him, as if it was Kyuhyun’s intention to consume him, drawing him so close that Yesung could feel Kyuhyun’s heartbeat thumping against his chest, its errant and erratic, thank god for that. If the younger could do the things he was doing to him with a steady heartbeat he would have fainted, that is not to say he was far off from such an act anyway, Kyuhyun’s lips on his bruising and punishing. It’s firm and rough, but he doesn’t dislike it, it’s still warm and it still tastes and feels like Kyuhyun. He is much too shocked to react, but Kyuhyun doesn’t seem to care too much, just deepening the kiss, his lips moving against Yesung’s with purpose, tasting and caressing, opening up to nibble and tug, to on his lower fold. The action was fleeting however, like some quick preview before the main event, but Yesung is much too daze to really do anything, all he could feel was the thumping of his heartbeat and blood flowing through his veins, a sound gushing through his ears , the smell of apples invading his nostrils. It’s all over Kyuhyun’s skin, especially fragrant against the span of skin his nose was perched against. He tried not to think too much, just letting Kyuhyun sweep him away.

He only flinches a little when Kyuhyun’s tongue invades his mouth. It doesn’t take much effort. His mouth was open anyway, Kyuhyun having caught him mid sentence, the shock preventing him from closing his mouth earlier, not that Kyuhyun gave him the opportunity later, wondering if that was Kyuhyun’s intention the second he pulled him away. Kyuhyun wanted to…what was Kyuhyun doing to him exactly?....’Ravishing is the word you are looking for’ his mind supplied. He agreed with it, just out of compulsion, since he was positive he would find no other word to describe what Kyuhyun’s tongue was doing to his mouth and by extension him, not with his sensibilities and any of his ability all but shot to hell, having no coherent thoughts to be honest.

 The second it had entered, Yesung further stilled, Kyuhyun having full reign to do as he pleased, taking full advantage of all that was offered to him. He explored at will, plundering and marking, touching all that he could, which was a lot apparently, Yesung experiencing it as if he was looking from afar, though he could feel the strong muscle burn a trail with its explorations, touching everything, creating a heat that he couldn’t describe. He left him unimpeded, Kyuhyun doing as he willed, which seemed to be carving his name. It was clear to him then. Kyuhyun’s intention was to brand him, his hands still clawing at his body, drawing him closer, impossibly closer, Yesung’s hands unfortunately caught prisoner between their bodies, squished against Kyuhyun’s chest, trying to pry it away bit by bit, simply to ease the discomfort he felt then, succeeding to get it away, just enough to atleast have some circulation, resting against Kyuhyun’s side, holding on as Kyuhyun continued to plunder, easing a bit when he decided that Yesung’s tongue was permitted to cower away long enough.

Kyuhyun was swiftly losing patience with his lack of response, immediately reaching for the frightened thing, wrapping around it in a show of dominance that was unchallenged. It is an odd feeling really. Yesung stupidly trying to recall the last time he had a tongue wrapped around his, trying to get adjusted to the feeling. Kyuhyun’s action  however, finally drawing Yesung out of his stupor, the weight of Kyuhyun’s warm  tongue against his is enough to trigger a reaction, trying to kiss Kyuhyun back out of instinct and affection, his lips moving, his tongue the invader shyly. It’s awkward though. Yesung knows it is .It’s been a while and he is out of practice. The pounding in his chest and weakness in his knees don’t make it easier either. He is nervous and his senses seem to have abandoned him.  His face was burning even more now and his legs felt like jelly, but he still tries to respond, poking the tongue attaching itself to his, pulling back the second Kyuhyun is less forceful, making a steady retreat, Kyuhyun immediately pulling him closer as his tongue gave chase, Yesung much too flustered to continue, using his hands on Kyuhyun’s body to push him away.

The response is not immediate, Kyuhyun’s arm instead tightening, but Yesung was determined to be free, pushing with more force, aware that he needed to breathe and soon at that. He had been holding his breath quite a while now and he was feeling a burn in his lungs. He was too caught up in the sensations [amazing, indescribable sensations….the warmth…the fragrance…the fire] to breathe before and holding his breath was a strain to him, the pounding in his chest much too strong. He needed Kyuhyun to release him, but the younger was determined not to do so, his tongue, still trying to catch Yesung’s cowardly one, until the older man decided that he needed to push Kyuhyun back, allowing his tongue forward to meet the invader, trying to push him back in that manner, a reflex action that was not well considered in truth. As could have been expected, this plan failed to have the desired effect, Kyuhyun mistaking his little jabs as efforts to probably play with him, into the kiss [the sound doing weird things to depths of Yesung's stomach but he didn’t want to think about that], as he pulled Yesung closer, rougher this time, filled with more passion, his action forcing Yesung up on to his tip toes as his weight shifted more onto Kyuhyun, who took it as a opportunity to hold on tighter. Yesung really could face palm. Nothing was working out for him he decided, having to take a more drastic measure, pushing Kyuhyun forcibly, the younger finally pulling away.

Yesung sighed in relief, his face a burning red and heart thumping scarily, pushing at Kyuhyun to give himself some space to breathe, taking large gulps, the burning in his throat subsiding greatly, his face a scarlet red, hand pressing against Kyuhyun to have some balance, his legs much too shaky to hold all his own weight in that moment grateful that Kyuhyun had his hands wrapped around him for that sole reason…really…just for that reason, his eyes closed for a second, trying to find his bearing. Finally he looked up at Kyuhyun seeing the younger man in a similar flustered state, taking rapid gulps of air, face a similar burning red. Yesung eyed him, wondering what on earth had gotten into him, using Kyuhyun’s disorientation to get some space between them, pulling away as best as he could, finally a few inches away from Kyuhyun’s chest, the younger’s hands refusing to budge from Yesung’s waist. Yesung was ready to talk to him once more then or atleast he hoped Kyuhyun would let him ask his questions, feeling shy and embarrassed and a hundred different things, trying his best to focus his mind on the immediate issues, so as not to go crazy and try and runaway. Kyuhyun’s wellbeing. That was it. What he had to ask about…right?

“Kyuhyun ah what on-“ Yesung questioned gently trying to coax Kyuhyun into talking to him, into telling him what had brought on his strange behaviour. Kyuhyun had always been gentle with him before and it was clear from the activities, that something was wrong with the younger man. Kyuhyun was desperate in his approach and that was scaring Yesung. He was sincerely worried about Kyuhyun amongst other things, which may or may not include anger and indignation, willing to admit however to endless butterflies and that fuzzy shy feeling lurking about, though he tried to bury those as much as possible, afraid that he would combust from the heat in his body. He was also willing to swallow his anger and indignation then, wanting to take care of Kyuhyun first. His annoyance was growing however, especially since he was interrupted once again.

Before he finished the sentence, Kyuhyun was swooping down to swallow his lips once again, this time more gentle and less probing, or maybe that was only because Yesung refused to open his mouth to him, that clearly being his intention. Yesung was determined not to let him in this time however, atleast not until he got his answers. Kyuhyun’s mood was tolerated for long enough and it was not being in the best manner to allow it to fester. From Kyuhyun’s actions, it was clear his disposition was in some way linked to Yesung and that made it even more relevant and in need of address. He was intent on resisting, trying to think of everything else other than the warm lips moving sensually over his, tugging and pulling, trying to coax him into opening up, doing a pretty good job at it if he were to be honest, having to forcibly grind his teeth together to keep it closed, reminding himself that he had a purpose and under no circumstances were he to give in, no matter how good it felt or how much the purring in his depths encouraged him to. Having something like a purpose was a great aspiration really, especially with the pounding in his chest and the burning in his cheeks, this thoughts muddled and distracted, Kyuhyun’s hands once more grabbing at his sides, trying ever so hard to bring him closer, even though there was nowhere to go. Yesung stupidly wonders if he wants to merge them together, because that would be the only way they could be any closer, but that was impossible. Did Kyuhyun know that was impossible? Kyuhyun didn’t act as if he did, still pulling him closer. His mind however reached through the apple scented haze and endless ponderings, to insist he focus on something else, like standing firm and creating some space. Now that would be a bit of a task.

Kyuhyun apparently was tired of coaxing, not liking the fact that he was being denied, decided to take actions into his own hands. He tugged on the lower fold, caressing and tasting, hoping one last time that his tenderness would permit some acceptance. It did not. Yesung being rather stubborn it would seem, Kyuhyun having no choice to bite down on the lower lip. He was a little regretful when he tasted a faint copper flavour, Yesung gasping, his mouth opening for a split second, Kyuhyun moving forward bravely, though this time stopping to swipe his tongue over the injured area, trying to atone for his sin. He really didn’t mean to hurt him. He just wanted him to let him in. Why didn’t he let him in? Why was he so difficult to deal with? He had been driving Kyuhyun insane. Even kissing him was difficult, Kyuhyun mused, a wry smile forming against the lips he was caressing. He was glad when he didn’t taste anymore blood, the skin mainly intact, a barely there graze the cause of the original release, satisfied and less guilty he pushed forward, only to lament that he had missed his opportunity, the teeth once more acting like a guard, Kyuhyun annoyed once more, though he could live with what he had achieved thus far, his heart settling a little. He felt Yesung pushing against him, determined to ignore it, only interested in the firm body his hands caressed and the taste of coffee and mint, the feel of his lips against soft silky skin. Yesung continued to push at him though, Kyuhyun grumbling in annoyance, only pulling him closer, which turned out to be a mistake, feeling a sharp pain in his side. Yesung had pinched him and hard at that. He pulled back on instinct, the pain a dull ache, Yesung pushing at his chest, making him lose his balance. This guy really!

It had to be done really. Kyuhyun won’t stop and he had bitten him. The brat had actually just bit him. He had to remember to kick him in the head for that. Before he could do that however, he had to deal with other more pressing matters, like getting Kyuhyun to let go of him. He had to do something and do it quickly. His lips stung a little bit and his body was tired from the continuous awkward position. If his heart pounded anymore he may die. He just needed Kyuhyun to get off so he could figure out what was wrong with him, salvage some of his own sanity and wellbeing [he really didn’t think it was healthy for a heart to pound so quickly for so long] and then kill Kyuhyun for biting him. He saw his opportunity when Kyuhyun shifted against him, the brat still tugging at him like some bear, large hands digging into his skin. He saw the perfect opening when his hand was tugged at, falling more to the side. Kyuhyun’s side was open, and whilst Kyuhyun was nowhere near as sensitive as he was, he was positive that if he did it hard enough the younger would have to pull away. He picked his moment perfectly, sticking his forefinger into Kyuhyun’s ribs, twisting it and grabbing the skin. It was rough and perfect! He smiled to himself when Kyuhyun pulled away, using his hands to push against his chest to keep Kyuhyun at bay, the younger looking slightly dazed, eyes sort of unfocused and bloodshot. Really? What on earth was going on with the child?

“Kyuhyun ah are you alright? What’s gotten into you?” Yesung questioned with urgency, the worry and annoyance pushing through his voice, his eyes raking over Kyuhyun critically, wide with worry and that tinge of anger that he was keeping at bay, proud that he had managed to keep his giddy feelings to himself, hands pushing against Kyuhyun’s chest to keep him far enough so that he could speak to him, Kyuhyun though not really helping, leaning forward once more, Yesung’s words seemingly bouncing off the brat’s hard stubborn head.

Yesung sighed when Kyuhyun leaned in to him again, not giving him a spare second to be honest. The second his hands relaxed a bit, the words barely out of his mouth, Kyuhyun was leaning into him again, pushing forward with single minded urgency, eyes clouded in a haze of mixed emotions that Yesung couldn’t read, though he could tell that Kyuhyun was flustered himself, the younger’s face red as well, though that did not deter him in the least, leaning forward with purpose, hands once more pulling at him, Yesung this time taking the initiative to avoid Kyuhyun’s advances. As if playing dodge ball, Yesung shifted his head and body away as much as humanly possible or rather as much as his close proximity to Kyuhyun would allow, darting side to side to avoid Kyuhyun’s lips, smiling despite his annoyance with the situation, Kyuhyun pouting from his own irritation at the situation, looking sort of adorable. Yesung was unfortunately very taken with the cuteness before him, unconsciously stopping his movements to coo at the younger man, which would sadly be to his detriment, Kyuhyun smirking at him as he swooped forward, hands pulling Yesung closer, his balance shifting, internally cursing at the situation, taking last minute action, turning his head away from Kyuhyun’s lips.

The maknae didn’t seem to mind that too much, making use of the alternative, seemingly deciding that if he couldn’t get to his lips he would devour his face, pressing hungry open mouthed kisses to Yesung's cheeks, the older man once more trying to shift out of the way, about at the end of his tolerance, positive his heart couldn’t continue at such a rate and if his cheeks burned anymore he was positive it would scar, the shyness and embarrassment he felt about the whole thing making his mind hazy, trying his hardest to escape. He was only refraining due to simple reasoning, mainly due to the fact that in that moment Kyuhyun’s wellbeing was more important. No matter how he looked at it, Kyuhyun’s conduct was not normal and he couldn’t let it persist. Kyuhyun continued to kiss him, any skin he could reach, moving along the smooth plains of Yesung's cheeks, to the bridge of his nose, even his eyebrows, caught awkwardly when Yesung moved. Kyuhyun didn’t seem to mind at all though, continuing his ministrations in happiness or something close to it. Yesung had a bad feeling that Kyuhyun was not happy, just sort of desperate. Kyuhyun was still plagued with the bubbling cauldron of emotions, but there was just something soothing about the pounding of Yesung's heart against his chest and the taste of his sweet skin.

Yesung however was unable to endure the ministrations, not finding as much joy as Kyuhyun, his skin hyper sensitive and his heart erratic, his breathe caught in his throat and his neck hurt form moving around. He was unsure exactly as to what he felt about the action to be honest. It was very different for him. He and Kyuhyun had a hard time working on building their attraction for each other and as such found things like intimacy to be difficult. Over time however, they had gotten accustomed to each other and little by little the attraction was growing. At first kissing Kyuhyun at all would have been difficult for him, being constraint by what he was accustomed to, but at that point in their relation he was comfortable enough with their relationship to accept things like that, to enjoy it. The shyness was what was hurting him though, what was clouding his mind in dread. Kyuhyun was touching him and it felt weird and he was embarrassed and he wanted to go hide somewhere. It was weird and he felt strange. He was big boy. He had been kissed before and whilst not as much as he would have hoped when he was in high school or even college, he had kissed  a decent number of girls, enough that he could atleast add  to a conversation. Being devoured by someone he was in love with however was a different story, that person being Kyuhyun was something else all together.

Everything was intensified, his body reacting differently to each touch, to each caress, memorizing the weight of Kyuhyun’s tongue, marvelling at the strength and the taste of the muscle, the feeling swelling in his heart at having Kyuhyun so close, his heart slamming against his chest with each touch, the electricity scorching his veins, roaming his body in unbridled surges, the hand digging into his side, becoming some sweet sort of torture, the skin red and burning from the touch, goose bumps that sent shivers all the way down to his toes, every single one of his pore opening to help cool the heat produced, even going so far to feel that little tug in the pits of his stomach, some blood moving south: definitely a new development!!. It was a lot to handle honestly, then couple that with his endless worry over Kyuhyun; he was surprised that he was even standing upright. His mind and body were worn out. It had only been a few minutes since it had all began, but he felt as if he had lived lifetimes in the moments between kisses, across the spans of caresses, the heat of each smouldering gaze. It took a lot out of him to deal with his own erratic heart and arrant mind, then being compelled to take care of Kyuhyun. He needed to breath and he needed space to do that. Distance was his best friend then.

He pushed at Kyuhyun’s body with force, the same strength he had been withholding earlier, finally putting his own wellbeing as priority. Kyuhyun however, took the pushes against him the wrong way, or rather he was fully well aware what they were meant to request and was decidedly choosing to deny that request. Was it a request? Yesung seemed more like he was commanding, but even so Kyuhyun didn’t care. Well….he cared. He always cared. That would never change, no matter what happened, no matter how strong the fire in his depths burned. This time however, he was not inclined to release him, not at all willing to let him be away from him. The image still burned into his mind, causing the Fire to burn uncontrollably. It was Yesung's own fault anyway. He had to deal with the consequences now. He had to have expected that really. Did he really think he would behave that way and not be punished, that Kyuhyun could just accept that? Did he think that he was free to act like that with whoever he pleased? Kyuhyun couldn’t tolerate things like that. His heart burned and a beast was awakened in his depths that he honestly had no control over. It was stormy and scary, an uncontrolled tempest that twisted his insides, his skin burning, not from shyness or passion but from rage and something that he couldn’t identity. That unknown creature, spreading out in blistering waves, incinerating all in its path, a single minded purpose created. It demanded that he held Yesung in his arms, that he claimed what rightfully belonged to him and ensured that the infuriating owner of his heart understood that he belonged to him; understand that he was Kyuhyun’s.

 It was a shocking experience really, having no other thoughts, no other objective, a complete single minded goal, twisting and stripping his soul, insisting that it commanded his body to act, the poor thing unable to hold against it eternally, letting a bit of the beast through, the effect immediate, the white abyss, now tainted with a fire he couldn’t describe, an unholy element that corrupted, all insisting on the same thing. Kyuhyun was powerless really. His mind was no match for such intensity, all resistance possible destroyed each time the image of Yesung leaning into Eunhyuk appeared before his eyes, his own mind infected with the disease of the beast’s creation, demanding  that he show Yesung just exactly who he belonged to. He tried to fight the desire, the commands, not wanting to hurt the older man, not wanting to scare him or to pressure him, the love in his heart pleading for tenderness. It was defeated by the fire though, pushing forward in endless waves, controlling Kyuhyun like a puppet. Each time he thinks he had a some control over it, he closed his eyes and saw the image of Yesung, HIS Yesung leaning into Eunhyuk and in that split second he feels only violence, feels the urge to break Eunhyuk in half and use his bones as ornaments. The desire to strangle his beloved, to brand him and mark him, to show him exactly who belonged to, to make him suffer for his infraction, the only thing springing to life, corrupting his every thought like some virus.

How could Yesung think that it was a good idea to do something like that? Did he not know he belonged to Kyuhyun? That he was only Kyuhyun’s? The fire would once more blaze in a rage and Kyuhyun couldn’t stop it, having no choice but to act. His love for the man the only thing that could never be corrupted, ensuring that no harm came to the older man, the desire to show ownership unbridled, Kyuhyun having no choice but to act in that regard. He would show Yesung what a real kiss was, what he should crave for, what he was supposed to do with Kyuhyun only, just exactly who he was bound to. It was a scary weird rush of emotions, but Kyuhyun stopped fighting it, the action being much too hard to control. Even the love that tempered everything let it run free, once he didn’t hurt the person he loved so dearly, Kyuhyun suspected it was influence by the sweet coffee flavour that invaded his mouth when he tasted the older man. It was a blistering wonderful taste that he would never get enough of or the firmness of the curves at the smaller man’s waist or the rhythm of Yesung's pounding heart against him. He couldn’t let him go. Yesung had to be his; he had to be in his arms. The fire wouldn’t permit any other option, though it was slowly being calmed by the worried eyes of the older man.

Yesung was always the one best at calming his emotions, even when he didn’t even know what he was feeling. He was feeling much too much and Yesung was perpetually reaching out to him, trying to ensure his wellbeing, to care for him. The tenderness slowly calming the burning beast within him, though it refused to be eradicated completely, atleast then he no longer had visions of a bloody Eunhyuk and could control himself well enough not to consume Yesung. It was a vast improvement really, though he was still hell bound on demonstrating to Yesung that he should never forget who his heart belonged to, or better yet, he should never forget who his body belonged to as well. Every time he thought of that image his blood pressure increased and he wanted to gorge his own eyes out. The memory unfortunately so horrid that it was etched in his mind’s eye, making it impossible for him to ignore, flashing before his eyes each time he even thought of letting him go, of granting Yesung his wish. The fire, that he now identified as possessiveness and he was ashamed to admit a bit of jealousy, was making it much too hard for him to comply, torturing him with those images until his hands would subconsciously reach for the comparatively petite body, only ending the torment when Yesung was pressed against him. He felt sick and flustered and tired and shy and embarrassed and angry and annoyed and so many more emotions that only seemed to give him peace when Yesung was pressed against him and his lips tasting the sweet skin. He had to continue. His sanity relied on it.

Yesung continued to push against him, Kyuhyun still determined to kiss him, anywhere he could reach was good enough for him, his heart pounding in his chest but his core feeling much more at ease with his actions, though having to rethink the idea when Yesung stamped down on his feet, looking at him with those eyes that said he was in trouble, that compliance was required. It was a look much different from Yesung's usual glare. This one was more even and tempered, though a thousand times scarier than a glaring Yesung. That look spoke of a lifetime of punishments and torture, of dark days ahead. Kyuhyun’s heart skipped a beat, nervous. He was unwilling to stop but definitely unwilling to deal with what those eyes were threatening. He referred the matter internally, indicating categorically that they were no match for Yesung if they let that mood he was developing persist, the thing with Eunhyuk more than likely to be a joke by the time he was through with them. The fire raged for a split second before reason had its way with it, Kyuhyun finally allowing the brief separation. He could meet Yesung half way, though he was unwilling to release him altogether. He couldn’t even if he wanted to. He was much too caught up with everything for that to even be a possibility to be frank. He was afraid of the repercussions honestly, but he was much more concerned about his sanity to completely let the older man go. They would have to compromise on that one unfortunately.

Kyuhyun acquiesced to Yesung's demands, pulling away, noticing the burning colouring of the older man’s face, skin burgundy and face glowing, drawing his attention, eyes focused but bearing that little dazed looked that Yesung was clearly trying hard to banish, head leaning back away from Kyuhyun to take long laboured breathes, a hand leaving Kyuhyun’s chest to take up residence against his own chest…No!... against his heart, looking rather delicious and tempting in Kyuhyun’s opinion.  ‘Oh no! Don’t even think about it……we can’t sleep without him’. He definitely couldn’t go there again or atleast not yet, that little voice in his mind mused, Kyuhyun’s own heart pounding in his chest, the shyness quickly returning as he had a second to think about what he just did. He was shocked he hadn’t been kneed in the groin as yet to be honest, feeling awkward at his conduct, only for such thoughts to be pushed aside by the fire, the scene of Eunhyuk and Yesung replaying before his eyes, the playful eyes and teasing touches, the dirty hand on Yesung's body, the love of his life, pushing forward and forward and forward, not even pulling away, lips pressed against Eunhyuk’s through a thin sheet of paper. His eyes were burning once again as if the scene was reoccurring in front of his, his hands unconsciously gripped the soft body in his hold, his temper and the urge to claim returning in a rush. Kyuhyun’s heart once more, pounding in his chest, his lungs feeling tight and stiff, bile rising in his throat. That was exactly what he needed apparently, he cursed at his mind and that stupid fire. He could not resist it much longer; his body and mind were infected.  

He was in a hopeless position he decided, as he leaned down,  this time not chancing that kick to the groin, resting his head against Yesung's warm chest, his forehead hitting the surprisingly toned area just beneath Yesung's collarbones, eyes closing as he just rested against the area, taking quick rapid breathes to ease the burn in his lungs even if it did nothing for the bitter acidic taste in his throat, his hands relaxing just that little bit, finally noticing that they were digging into Yesung's side due to his close proximity. This time he gently tugged on the older man, wanting to hold him close, feeling like a child holding on to a parent. He let the sound of Yesung's heartbeat wash over his body, his own heart slowing to meet the now easy heartbeat, thumping strongly against his ear, using the time to will the colour away from his cheeks, rubbing his cheek against the firm chest, feeling comfort from the action, grateful that the stylist gave Yesung a t-shirt rather than an actual shirt like what he was wearing, positive the buttons would have hurt him and prevented the action. He really needed to be there in that moment.

He had been erratic since the party and he was positive he had let the blinding fire control his actions. He used the minute to sort through some of the fog and try to quench the fire or atleast withhold some of its influence. He had just seen the effects of his brashness, of his rough, bordering on violent reaction and he was embarrassed. The fire inside was still burning strongly, insisting that he had done the right thing, that he should not have stopped but the view of his fingers digging into Yesung's side and redness of his face, had allowed some sanity to return, bringing with it, the flashes of fear that coloured the older man’s face when he practically pounced on him. He was regretful. Just that little bit regretful. He still had the flames insisting that he was right and in truth it was hard to argue with it, the visions before his eyes all damning on their own. With the addition of reason however, he couldn’t help think he should have been a little gentler.

Yesung was not accustomed to him sticking his tongue down his throat and it must have come as a shock to him. Yesung was shy and he worked hard to ensure Yesung was always comfortable with him. He would hate to think that he had just ruined that. He didn’t know what came over him really, but the fire was just blazing in his insides and all he could think about was ‘owning’ the older man, about teaching him where his ownership rested. Now that he thought about it, he was probably an idiot. Make no mistake about it however, Yesung was HIS. Come hell or high water that was one thing that would not be changed, but there were probably better ways to handle the situation though. He didn’t have to act so aggressively. Yesung was accustomed to his tenderness, not his insecurities. He had definitely behaved ridiculously. He couldn’t say he was sorry though, because then he would be lying. He was regretful that he had caused pain or shock, but he was not sorry for claiming what was his. The Fire may have been an idiot, but it came from genuine feeling and it would be rather dishonourable to throw the blame on the Fire alone.

 He had always had issues with people touching Yesung and had even more problems with Yesung's habit of playing with his dongsaengs like that. Most of the time he was able to let it go, but seeing Yesung leaning in like that caused something to snap inside of him. He felt as if he were burning. He knew somewhere deep down that Yesung was just playing with Eunhyuk and all those other rational explanations that he didn’t care about in that moment, his eyes bleeding at the sight of his beloved leaning in to kiss someone else, holding on to Eunhyuk, touching Eunhyuk, smiling at Eunhyuk…arrrgggggggggggghhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!! Why was he thinking about that again? Seeing it first hand and not popping a blood vessel was already torture, not breaking Eunhyuk’s jaw was difficult and not murdering Yesung was hard, he thought he deserved some consideration for his actions. He was in a rage that took all his self control to harness, so he should be forgiven for losing that bit of control. Would Yesung be forgiving? Was he mad? The look in his eyes just then was a little scary but the fact that he had not kicked him somewhere painful was a good sign, also that he did not deck him and was allowing him to rest against him were all working in Kyuhyun’s favour.

He snuggled against the warm chest, his hands no longer holding on to Yesung's hips and waist, instead looping at his back, creating like a flow regulator, holding him in place but with  sufficient opportunity for movement, head snuggled comfortably against the older man, contemplating his actions and the possible repercussions of them, body feeling stressed and mind tired. He is energized however when a tentative hand is placed against his back. It is one hand at first, the palm pressing down on his shoulder blade. It was light and unsure, Kyuhyun snuggling closer, shifting his body to rest just a bit beneath Yesung's chin. That action promotes the hand to become hands, the first sliding along the expanse of area, to settle comfortably a bit lower, the other hand doing the same, until both are clasp together, tapping smooth rhythm against his skin. It’s gentle and kind and Kyuhyun automatically knows he has nothing to worry about. Even if Yesung is mad at him, in true Yesung fashion he was willing to put Kyuhyun’s wellbeing first, Kyuhyun leaning up to press a few kisses to the older man’s throat, immediately pulling away, the gentle hands smacking against his back playfully, Kyuhyun chuckling silently to himself as he reburied himself against the older man’s chest.

“Kyuhyun ah are you alright? What’s wrong? Tell me what’s wrong Kyuhyun ah” Yesung questioned the man practically hiding in his arms, so different from the from the man that had just plundered and seized him, instead in his place, all Yesung saw was his BabyKyu feeling tired and probably stressed, holding on to him for dear life, continuing to rub a soothing hand against his back, trying to comfort him. It would be true to say he had his own issues with Kyuhyun’s conduct and his own manner in which he would like to address them, namely a swift kick for biting him, but in that moment, all his anger and annoyance with the younger man had to give way to the more relevant consideration, namely what was brothering the maknae. It was clear his recent behaviour was peculiar to say the least and had to stem from some sort of internal turmoil or atleast some sort of feeling. Yesung was tasked then with determining what had caused Kyuhyun to behave like that and what he could do to help him in that moment. Kyuhyun seemed calm then. He didn’t see his eyes but he was sure it would be more relaxed now. He wanted Kyuhyun to talk to him, to tell him what was wrong. Kyuhyun didn’t seem ready to respond immediately, so Yesung continued his soft petting, trying to coax the younger man into a response, ensuring that his movements would be the sort that Kyuhyun would feel comforted by.

He felt Kyuhyun shifting against him, but didn’t react very much, just continuing his actions, trying not to giggle when the strands of the younger man’s hair brushed against his lower chin, making him felt soft shivers, trying to hold his position however. The younger continued shifting about but his grip didn’t wean once, leaning down a little to coax further “Kyu ah, tell me what’s wrong”, spoken softly against the younger’s hair, a gentle delicate action, laced with sincerity and concern.

“You’re mine” Kyuhyun mumbled against Yesung's t-shirt, voice soft and shy, the sound of the response muffled by the shirt he was buried into, his hands, sliding under the jacket the older man still wore, tugging once more, this time more childishly than forcibly, hands holding on carefully, his embrace strong and definite, refusing to release him, this time taking that small step forward to bring himself closer.

He was embarrassed to say the words then. At first he was so commanded by force, driven by that singular thought, nothing else being permitted to enter his mind except that Yesung was his, but to actually say it he felt shy. It was not often that he was shy; being of a nature that he would deny things like that and rather conceal it skilfully, if he did feel shy. This time it was hard to do either. He had to say something. Yesung was his back and that point he was compelled to do as he asked. He thought he could say it confidently, just as he had intended to do, but now that Reason had made an appearance, he became startlingly aware that his conduct and his words were both rather childish and petty. Yesung played with a dongsaeng and he gets in a rage and practically molests him, throwing a tantrum. Yep! He had lots to be proud of. When he broke it down to its simplest form, he just becomes a childish idiot. He didn’t even know why he was like that. Well….he had an incline, but that didn’t comfort him.

He was so level headed before. He never reacted emotionally or even if he did, it was always tempered and controlled. Yesung made things like that impossible for him though. He couldn’t even buy control if he wanted to anymore. All he could do was act, to feel. It was frustrating and downright embarrassing now. How was he supposed to face the older man with any pride? He still didn’t regret it honestly, but he was definitely not proud of the manner he handled it. If he could he would have kicked the Fire into a never ending abyss, but he couldn’t. He would feel that way and he would react. It was stupid to fight that, but what he could have done, was let his rationality guide his actions. He was an idiot. Now he had to say something like that and he felt even more stupid. He didn’t have the courage to just say it, but he still wanted Yesung to be informed, even if he felt embarrassed that he felt that way. He was not obtuse enough to not know that his complete capitulation to the Fire was not a good sign and somewhere in the haze he was well aware his possessive nature was not natural or something that Yesung would appreciate. He didn’t know why he was like that, but it was what it was.

He had always been possessive of the things he loved, things he considered to be his and with Yesung; everything was amplified to a degree that scared even him. He older man made his insides burn with the need to hold him close, to protect him from everything and anyone. No matter what happened he couldn’t lose him under any circumstances. He had learnt to share though. With Yesung and his freaking annoying need to be with all his dongsaengs and friends, it would be like suicide if he didn’t force himself to have some acceptance of the fact that Yesung was not something he could control always, not something that he could put in a nice little hold and never let him out. Maybe it was his karma. He was paying for his sins. He just had to fall in love with the one person he couldn’t cage. The older man was like the wind honestly. He was here and there; free to do as he pleased, never in the same place twice. He couldn’t control that. He knew he couldn’t. Yesung couldn’t even control his ownself, what hope would he have? Instead he forced himself to learn tolerance, to learn to accept that he would have to share, that he would see things he didn’t like and would have the urge to murder people. He could endure. It was the price of perfection and he was more than willing to pay it. Sometimes though, it was just too hard, the price much too steep. Seeing him play that way with Eunhyuk was like a knife to his heart. He burned with the fury he had banished; his natural possessiveness raging bloody murder.

 He couldn’t control it always and things like that were just over the threshold of his tolerance. It had been building for months, each time he let it go, he tried to forget it. Yesung was just playing with a dongsaeng, he knew that. He never once doubted the older man’s intention or purpose, or suspected something inappropriate, yet he still despised seeing someone else receive smiles that were his or happiness that should have come from him. He had tolerated and accepted, but when Yesung leaned in, that fine line that he had been threading snapped. It was just too much for him. He had no strength to stop the fire that burned inside him and was just swept away by the need to have Yesung be his. He was more than likely insane. He knew that. Yet it didn’t change what he felt. Even if he was a possessive jackass, Yesung was his and he had to know that.

Yesung was straining his ear to make out what Kyuhyun was saying. He knew the younger had spoken, but the words were badly muffled. He thinks he heard him say something about ‘mine’, so tried to mentally piece the sentence together, but was having difficulty. He could smack the brat for always giving so much stress. Just now he was fire and power, now he was a child clinging to him. What was he supposed to do with him? He was beyond worried about the child in his arms and didn’t know exactly how to proceed. Despite the younger ‘s bash actions from earlier, he knew him well enough to know that he was just reacting to something, that he was upset about something and was just letting it control him. He needed to know what was causing the heartache for him to have a chance of fixing it. He would sigh but knew Kyuhyun hated it, so bit his lip as he mentally listed his options in his mind.

“Kyuhyun ah you have to tell me what’s wrong. Why are you acting this way?” Yesung questioned with some force, after he had unclasped his hands from Kyuhyun’s dorsum and reached for his head, placing his fingers delicately on Kyuhyun’s soft cheeks, pulling up the younger man to face to him, staring straight into the younger red tired eyes, a mix of emotions whirling around, embarrassment and shyness being obvious, further corroborated by the redness of his cheeks, the others being a little more unclear, though Yesung could see that spark of fire lurking in there somewhere, a trace of annoyance on the firmness of his jaw, the scent of resignation and self deprecation on the pull of his brows. It was like reading a puzzle book, trying to mentally piece together all the parts to determine the whole picture, except it was so much harder as it was based on human emotions and those were never as simple as they appeared.

He knew though, that he was right about Kyuhyun being troubled about something. It was clear as day to him, the surrounding emotions a weird mix that he didn’t think he was capable of distinguishing, not even sure Kyuhyun knew what was going on with his own self. He tried to put his own emotions aside then, focusing completely on Kyuhyun, looking at the younger man with warm compassionate eyes, a soft soothing smile in place, his fingers warm and soft against his skin, nodding Kyuhyun’s head playfully, up and down like a child, Kyuhyun smiling at the cuteness of the older man, induced by the concern that was shown to him. He knew Yesung must be mad that he had behaved so childishly, practically ambushing the man yet he was willing to let his own dissatisfaction wash away so that he could take care of him. How does someone not love someone like him? How could he be expected not to hide him away, not to protect him from everything and everyone else? Yesung was just too loveable. Anyone and everyone would love him and Kyuhyun refused to lose him. He just couldn’t. He had to ensure Yesung be his always. He looked away then, feeling that now familiar Fire inside burn with determination, not wanted to be induced by it again. Yesung however was unwilling to let him turn away, tugging his head back into place, his eyes strong and determined, clearly waiting for his answer.

“I missed you(?)” Kyuhyun responded, or maybe questioned. It came out weird. He wasn’t sure what he was supposed to say and was then unwilling to disclose his crazy thoughts specifically or atleast in that manner as of yet. He would do it he was sure, just when he was more comfortable. It was nerve wracking to have those intense sharp almond eyes piercing your soul. It stripped him bare and made him feel . In that minute there was nothing he could hide or conceal and he honestly didn’t want to scare Yesung away. He could just imagine the look of horror on the older man’s face if he had a look at his crazy messed up mind. Yesung liked his freedom. It was something that defined him and Kyuhyun tried hard to grant him that part of himself, so he was positive Yesung would be horrified by the thoughts that ran through his mind. Hell! If he was someone else, he would advise that Yesung not even date someone like him, much less hold on to him. He was crazy. Yesung deserved better clearly.

He hoped Yesung accepted his statement, but the fact that he said it as a question would definitely work against him. Yesung was not that oblivious and it didn’t help that he read Kyuhyun like a book, unable to hide anything from him. He didn’t try to lie though. Yesung would know in a heartbeat if he did. He did miss him. He always missed him, even if it was just for a second, especially heighten by his constant flow of emotions and that fear that he had chained somewhere inside him that Yesung would leave him soon. It was a tough couple of days for him, he realized, as he once more pushed forward, through the hands holding his face to rest his head against Yesung's shoulder, turning to skilfully snuggle against the older man’s throat, sneakily pressing a soft kiss to the juncture of his cervix, hands shifting to have a more comfortable hold on Yesung’s body.

“You are being ridiculous. We just spent all day together” Yesung chuckled amiably, pressing a kiss to the mat of hair just beneath his eye line, rubbing a hand on the younger man’s back. He didn’t believe him for a second. Kyuhyun was not lying per say but he was not saying what he should. He knew instantly that Kyuhyun was being difficult but he decided not to force him. He had made progress already. Kyuhyun was speaking to him now. Bit by bit the younger would feel comfortable enough to say what was bothering him. Till then Yesung was content to play along with him. He wouldn’t pressure him to say it, not wanting Kyuhyun to clam up on him. He would instead take his time and pry it out of the younger bit by bit. He smiled at the younger fondly, though tainted with that bit of disbelief, sort of indulgent to be honest, pulling at Kyuhyun’s cheek playfully.

“I really did miss you” Kyuhyun insisted, aware that Yesung had in no way bought his claim, though unwilling to acknowledge that fact. It was easier to just let it go, since it was clear that Yesung was just going along with him. He was happy for that atleast. He was feeling better anyway. Embarrassment at his conduct notwithstanding, he was much more relaxed after holding on to the older man for so long, after being with him, after tasting and marking. He was petty. He knew that. He was still feeling better though, less controlled by the urge to swallow the older man. He clearly had issues he decided, as he leaned upwards to press a kiss to Yesung's cheeks, catching his jaw line due to his position. It was gentle this time, soft and careful, wanting show appreciation for Yesung's understanding of his heart. He knew the older man didn’t believe him but he still tried to understand Kyuhyun’s mind and heart. He felt appreciation and affection swelling in his heart for the older man, love flowing through his veins, pressing soft grateful kisses to the soft cheeks, as he lifted from his snuggled position, no longer as full as they ought to be. He missed his chubby cheeks. Did he ever tell him that? He had to remember to do that soon, leaning downwards burying his head in Yesung's throat once again, pressing a few tentative kisses there as well.

“Alright that’s enough. Get off” Yesung instructed, his voice tainted with his giggles, bellying his would be seriousness, the skin much too sensitive to withstand the teasing nature of Kyuhyun’s lips, fresh goosebumps springing to life in the spot, definitely not willing to endure anymore of the sensitivity. His heart rate was already speeding up and he wanted some peace. He had indulged Kyuhyun enough in that regard. Kyuhyun was still upset at the heart of it, but he was calm now. He would deal with that in time, through gentle verbal actions. In the meantime he needed to keep some semblance of sanity, his own feelings of shyness and embarrassment only held back by a thin barricade he erected haphazardly, which he did not want to have to deal with, the recollection of the taste of Kyuhyun’s tongue enough to have his heart slamming against his chest and his face burning. He would deal with all of that later. All he wanted to do was take care of Kyuhyun.

To do that however, he needed to have some sort of breathing space between them both. Kyuhyun had to atleast give him that much. He pushed at the younger man’s chest, Kyuhyun being less stubborn now, stepping back from him, smiling at him with a hint of shyness, though he looked mainly self satisfied however, seemingly liking his little exploits. The sight actually infuriating Yesung. There he was dying from shyness and embarrassment, feeling self conscious and tingly and Kyuhyun had the audacity to look pleased with himself. He smacked him hard on the chest, instantly feeling better, Kyuhyun pouting at him, Yesung groaning. The brat would kill him, he was sure.

He took action immediately, pulling his eyes away from the sight of the younger man, not wanting to get caught with that again, his own mind filled with various thoughts. He had to deal with his own emotions and still he had to figure out what was bothering Kyuhyun. The younger looked better, but Yesung knew that was just the surface. He had still acted way out of his usual conduct and that much craziness had to come from somewhere. That  part was far from over, though he was happy that Kyuhyun’s mind seemed to have settled a bit more, no longer looking scary and temper driven, more back to his usual snarky infuriating self, only tainted by the barely there blush he was wearing and that bit of sheepishness that seemed to take him from time to time. He was looking at Yesung with that fake innocence he had perfected, sneakily leaning down again, Yesung having none of it, pushing away before he could even start, reaching downwards to hold onto Kyuhyun’s hands that had returned to his waist at some point, prying them off, Kyuhyun being difficult as to be expected, pulling him once more against him, being childish in the worst possible ways. He rolled his eyes at the actions of the younger man, wondering why he put up with all his craziness. Kyuhyun always said he was the weird one, but if you asked him, Kyuhyun was the weird one. How could one person be so charismatic and mature in one second and be a clingy child in the next? He would never know he decided, as he leaned forward and pecked Kyuhyun on his pouting lips, distracting him enough with the action to pull his hands away and swiftly making a retreat.

Kyuhyun could kick himself for falling for that. He did it every time and he was horribly embarrassed. Was he that easily swayed or was he so desperate for affection? He was most definitely an even man and there would be no way he would be willing to accept that he was so easily swayed by Yesung. The man was a freaking minx! He did everything so sensually that Kyuhyun was hopeless, especially now in his current state. He didn’t want to let him go. Even though the fire was now cooled, the urge to hold on to Yesung still not retreating. His anger and his frustration were much too raw to just subside. The addition of his rationality had meant that he now had better sense and could recognize that attacking Yesung was not right, but that didn’t mean he was healed enough to let him out of his arms. The warmth in his arms and the feeling of him pressed against his body was the only thing keeping him sane. He needed him, atleast until he could repair the damage, until he could compartmentalize and extinguish the fire completely.

He needed time to let rationality work its magic, for it to convince his mind and soul that it couldn’t behave that way, that it couldn’t expect the older man to always be within their reach, that they couldn’t prevent him from playing with others, to reconcile with the fact that there would be things he couldn’t control and times when he would just have to accept that Yesung was a free spirit that he couldn’t control. He knew all those things, but after the day he had, he couldn’t process any of it. If he closed his eyes he would still see Siwon’s hands running along Yesung's, he could see the blinding smiles directed at the annoying man, he would see Eunhyuk’s hand at his waist and his lips against his. Even if it was just a game it was downright traumatic for him. He thinks he may have endured all that, not being an unreasonable man, but the vision of Yesung holding onto Eunhyuk, leaning forward, lips pressed against each other was burned into his retinas and if he wanted to have a chance at clearing his mind and allowing rationality to get to work, he needed Yesung in his arms to drive the demons away, to keep him sane and balanced, until he could wash the visions away forever, or atleast until he didn’t feel murderous. He couldn’t let him go.

He spotted him across the room, pulling off his t-shirt, soft smooth abs coming into view, Kyuhyun looking at the tamed skin and formations, eyes immediately looking down at his own chest, doing that classic male thing of comparing, grumbling as he ran a hand down his own stomach, aware that such formations were nowhere close to being there. He was fairly in shape but he did not have the defined lines. He stupidly wondered if Yesung liked that sort of thing, feeling stupid for thinking about it and even more stupid for getting mad when he realized that people like Siwon and Donghae and Eunhyuk had things like that…hell everyone did but him. Yesung better hate abs!

By the time he was finished banishing stupid thoughts and not feeling like an idiot, Yesung was mainly changed, already into his sweat pants and pulling a shirt out of his closet. Kyuhyun took a few quick steps towards him, realizing that his musing had him wasting precious time, allowing the demons to find space to exist, wondering why Yesung was not in his arms as yet? By the time he got to him, Yesung was turned away from him, pulling the old t-shirt over his head, and onto his body. It comes as no surprise that he yelps and jumps a feet into the year when Kyuhyun wraps his arms around him, the younger man trying to be helpful, pulling the shirt down for him as Yesung dealt with the shock, a hand coming up to tap his heart in an attempt to slow it down, Kyuhyun using his shocked state to attach himself against the older man’s back, hands wrapping around his waist, head resting against his shoulders. Yesung pulled away a little, but Kyuhyun just held on tighter, refusing to let go. He supposed it was degrading in a way to conduct himself like that, definitely not something his pride liked. He was able to remove the sting however when he indicated quite clearly that it was for the best, his pride giving way on that point. He was right. He needed to hold Yesung in his arms and his selected formation was the most practical. He was as close as possible and body position in such a way that it would be difficult for Yesung to shrug him off, unless he elbowed him and he was standing far enough where that shouldn’t have been an issue really.

He snuggled against the area rather shamelessly, Yesung grumbling something about koalas and clingy children but Kyuhyun didn’t care to listen to him, making himself comfortable, head leaning into the cervix, hands looping around the older man’s waist, feeling those same soft abs he had just been admiring against his finger tips, his back pressed against the surprisingly strong expanse of muscle, Yesung shrugging a bit at first, but just settling in resignation, seemingly deciding that he could tolerate a large heavy koala in the form of Kyuhyun clinging to him, the modified back hug giving Kyuhyun joy. He allowed a hand to raise up towards the joint hands, Kyuhyun tensing as he thought that Yesung would attempt to pry him off, relaxing when all he did was rest his fingers along the joined knuckles, tapping them a bit playfully, turning a bit to roll his eyes at Kyuhyun, who smiled sort of sheepishly at him, Yesung making no comment.

Yesung however took a step forward, pushing Kyuhyun off balance, his body slamming into Yesung who was forced to steady himself, glaring at Kyuhyun, who was so shameless that he refused to let go, the older man just shaking his head as a response. Once he was sure they were both steady he took another step, pausing for  a split second, before he took another, stopping as he reached the chair nearby, reaching for the clothes he had thrown on it haphazardly, his body moving forward to grab at the clothes, Kyuhyun trying to keep his balance upright. He was forced to walk behind Yesung and so far it was not very uncomfortable, and he felt sort of embarrassed. He was like a child clinging to his parent and that made him feel awkward. The uneasiness however giving way to the happiness he felt to be so close and the fact that the scent of coffee and cinnamon was doing a pretty good job of eliminating any possibility of other thoughts entering. He no longer felt as if he was on fire and his mind was less flustered. His healing progress had already commenced and he had no intention of letting Yesung go until it was completed. He would just have to learn how to walk behind someone in such a manner, once more snuggling against the back, trying to find a comfortable position.

Yesung continued to walk forward paying no mind to Kyuhyun. Initially he was shocked to feel him against him, but as he allowed his heart to settle he realized that he shouldn’t have been too surprised by the action. With the mood Kyuhyun was in and his previous actions thus far, it was something that he should have expected. Kyuhyun had made it clear that he wanted to hold on to him, all his actions tainted by that possessiveness that just reeked off of him. It should have been obvious that he wouldn’t want to let go, Yesung actually surprised that he let him change in peace. He let his body adjust to the extra weight, reminding himself to let Kyuhyun know he was not light and should be careful in the future, least he squished him, continuing with the things he had to do. He was intending to struggle, but decided that it was probably a good thing that Kyuhyun was so close. That way he knew he was close by and could keep an eye on him. He was more than sure that whatever that was bothering Kyuhyun was tied to him in some way and would have to deal with that soon enough. He could let Kyuhyun cling to him like a koala if that helped him.

It also clearly showed that Kyuhyun wasn’t mad at him exactly, judging by the fact that he was with him in such a manner. If he was mad he would avoid him or be a lot more troublesome and moody. It wasn’t anger but it was something close. How else could he explain the roughness that Kyuhyun applied to him earlier? Kyuhyun was rarely that uncaring with him, his movements tainted with some sort of anger but not definitely. If Kyuhyun was close, he would examine the younger man and his moods and determine just what exactly was troubling him. Kyuhyun was such a child sometimes, didn’t know what to do with him. He chuckled low in his throat at the thought, turning into a soft laugh as he walked to the laundry hamper, Kyuhyun trekking along with him, one step behind his, refusing to release him still, depositing his dirty clothes, turning towards his bed, Kyuhyun tugging on him to slow down, walking a difficult process for them both, Yesung tempted to tell him to it up, seeing as he was the one that insisted that they be so joined anyway.

He stopped his movement at the foot of his bed and Kyuhyun was caught off guard for a second, body jerking forward, working hard to brace himself as not to fall against Yesung's back again. He was not so ridiculous as to not recognize that he was heavy and each time he jerked forward he ran the risk of hurting the older man. He was careful in that regard. He wanted to be with Yesung, not to hurt him. He was slightly annoyed that Yesung chose to deposit his clothes in the hamper even when he knew it was difficult for Kyuhyun to walk, but he realized that was probably Yesung's way of punishing him. He was glad when Yesung finally made his way to his bed, happy if it meant he would get to hold him in his arms in a more comfortable position, though the sudden stop made him lose his balance, body falling backwards, Yesung choosing that moment to move. He was very annoyed! But then he was grateful, Yesung swiftly spinning around in his arms, hands extending to steady his body, the older man not escaping really, instead turning to face him, settling his body better when Kyuhyun was stable. Kyuhyun released a breath as his legs were finally planted on the floor, looking to see Yesung smiling at him with affection.

The smaller man released his hands holding Kyuhyun steady, his eyes never leaving Kyuhyun’s, the smile on his face warm as he lifted the now free hand to Kyuhyun’s face, a small finger caressing his cheek, a small line drawn down the plain of Kyuhyun’s cheek, the other hand reaching downwards to tug at the hands Kyuhyun at clasp at his waist, prying it apart, Kyuhyun much too mesmerized by the smaller man’s actions to stop him, thankful when Yesung only laced their fingers together, continuing his gentle caress of the maknae’s face, his eyes shining with affection. With a soft smile, he removed his hand, Kyuhyun contemplated stopping him, smiling when he realized that he didn’t have to, Yesung simply roaming his hand down to his shoulders, resting his hand there, the other shrugging off Kyuhyun’s hand, coming up to reach the same place. He patted down the material a bit before he slid his hands inwards to the lapels. With gentle ease, he carefully slid the article of clothing off Kyuhyun’s shoulders, movement by movement. Kyuhyun was mesmerized by the whole thing, entirely looking much too sensual than it should be, Kyuhyun blushing instantly. Everything about it felt weird and it made him feel rather shy to be honest, turning his face way from Yesung, so was then focused on getting the blazer off his arms, Kyuhyun assisting as best as he could. Yesung smiled happily when he succeeded, dropping the jacket unceremoniously on the floor.

He hoped the stylist noona would forgive him, positive that Kyuhyun would not let him get to the hamper and he really couldn’t walk with his weight on him that much further again. He reached down and laced their hand again, wordlessly turning towards the bed. His knee was first, followed by another, Kyuhyun easily following his lead, the action being rather familiar to them both. No words were needed either as they settled on the bed, Yesung lying flat on his back, head resting against the soft pillow that Kyuhyun loved, Kyuhyun taking his spot next to him, Yesung leaning forward surprising Kyuhyun. Before he would ask what he was doing, Yesung tugged the pillow from beneath his head switching it with the one Kyuhyun was to lie on, returning to his lying position, eyes closing, as he settled himself.

They stayed in silence for a couple of minutes, both settling themselves, Kyuhyun making himself comfortable, turning to look at the man besides him with a small smile, shifting his body closer, sliding himself into place. Yesung did not say anything when he felt Kyuhyun at his side, nor did he say something when Kyuhyun leaned over his body, or when Kyuhyun’s head was against his chest, neither when the younger placed his chest against his or when his hand span across the expanse of his body or when the younger’s feet become tangled with his. His only action thereafter was to shift himself to accommodate the new position, wrapping a hand around Kyuhyun’s shoulder and lowering his chin to rest against Kyuhyun’s mat of hair just beneath his jaw. He held him close as possible, the hand at the younger’s shoulder was steady and unmoving, tapping his fingers comfortingly. He let Kyuhyun settle against him, noting the hand that gripped into his side; Kyuhyun once more marking his ownership. He said nothing then either, opening his eyes to gaze on the younger man. Kyuhyun’s face was serene, but Yesung knew that he had a lot on his mind, his heartbeat being indicative of this, much faster than it usually was. Yesung would know the usual level, having spent endless hours in similar positions. Yesung is patient. He would wait.

“I have given you enough time. Spit it out. What’s wrong?” Yesung questioned seriously, his voice gentle but carried that no nonsense air that Kyuhyun was familiar with. Yesung was an even person, but Kyuhyun knew the difference, or atleast Yesung hoped that Kyuhyun knew the difference. He hoped that Kyuhyun realize that it was his time to speak, least he test his patience even further. He pressed a kiss to the mat of dark hair once again, trying to soften his words and encourage Kyuhyun to respond to him. He really had waited long enough.

Since the younger had entered the room, he had been asking him the same question. He had allowed Kyuhyun enough time to settle his mind and gather his thoughts, to get his ill feeling or anger under control. He didn’t pressure him or prod him, but his time of exception had come to an end. It was not that he was an impatient person, just that he was worried. What if it were a matter that would just ferment with time? He couldn’t let it persist longer than appropriate, less it create damage that he couldn’t heal with a few soft words and a few kisses if need be? If something was wrong with Kyuhyun he couldn’t let it continue for much longer. He only left it so long as to give Kyuhyun ample opportunity to sort himself out. He always tried not to hover too much, not to suffocate Kyuhyun. It was one of his great fears, that he would cling to Kyuhyun and annoy him. He always took proper care in that area; refusing to let something like that happen. He worked hard to balance that with his responsibility towards Kyuhyun. The younger man was his to protect and take care of. He couldn’t fail in that regard. He had to take care of Kyuhyun. Part of that care naturally included ensuring the younger’s mind was always settled. Kyuhyun would speak to him, one way or the other.

“Don’t play with Eunhyuk hyung  anymore” Kyuhyun instructed childishly, his voice sounding very much as childish as you would expect from someone saying those words, though Yesung was sure in Kyuhyun’s mind they were meant to be commanding and serious, the whine more than likely escaping through to the emotion that he felt than the intention behind the words, the words themselves slightly muffled as Kyuhyun buried himself into Yesung's chest even more, the hand at Yesung's side pulling and grabbing, drawing himself to be completed wrapped up with the older man, like some sort of shield.

Yesung held back the laugh threatening to escape from his depths, finally figuring out exactly what was wrong with Kyuhyun. He really should have known before. Now that he looked at it, it was clear as day why Kyuhyun was behaving that way. He always thought Kyuhyun had more control than that to be honest. He had long discovered that Kyuhyun was irrationally possessive. That came after a dark week and a long conversation, Kyuhyun not saying so in so many words, but it was clear even for someone as oblivious as he was. Even before then he knew Kyuhyun was like that, having seen it at times, but never once did he think it would be to such a level. When he realized just how possessive Kyuhyun was, he was shocked, and ashamed to admit that he was not scared as he should have been, feeling rather flattered to be the object of such feeling. He was once more ashamed to admit, that despite the result being bruises on his side and a grazed lip, he still sort of liked the feeling, the knowledge that he was so precious to the younger man that he sent him into such fits of rage.

He was flattered that Kyuhyun loved him so much that he was determined to keep him close. It did a lot for his ego to be honest.  He was messed up. He knew that. He actually took joy in Kyuhyun bruising him in his endless need to show his ownership to boost his ego. He knew he had issues, but the happiness was the same. It was a nice feeling, knowing that Kyuhyun loved him to such an extent, that Kyuhyun never wanted to let him go. No matter how he looked at it, despite the end result, he couldn’t seem to hate it. Kyuhyun was not violent or ridiculous, just rather more petulant and childish. Even if he was a bit brash earlier, he was still gentle and caring. He could appreciate the sentiment if nothing else. He just wished that Kyuhyun would understand however that he didn’t have to be that way, that no matter what he was committed to him and the relationship that they shared. He would try to explain it to him, but he knew that no matter what he did, Kyuhyun was naturally a selfish person.

He never liked sharing things that he considered to be his; that he had that possessive streak ingrained in his personality.  Yesung had long realized that the younger man was helpless in that regard, more than likely incurable. He never worried about it too much though. Kyuhyun often seemed to have it under control, though from time to time it was more glaring than others, but for the most part they were both more or less alright. He accepted it to be Kyuhyun’s unique personality trait, just as the younger man always accepted him for who he was. He would just have to get accustomed to Kyuhyun’s disposition and steadily help Kyuhyun understand that there was no real need to be like that. He was very certain of his dedication to Kyuhyun and he prayed the younger man understood that. Feeling a bit of sympathy for the child clinging to him, he returned the embrace as well, bring his other free hand up to hold on to Kyuhyun, shifting his head so that he could press a few kisses to the maknae’s forehead.

“I like playing Eunhyukkie. He is cute” Yesung commented, grinning to himself silently, intent to tease Kyuhyun. Maybe it was mean, but it was definitely entertaining. He saw it as bit of payback for the lip biting.  He did have a purpose through it all though. He was aware that Kyuhyun was jealous [though positive the younger man would NEVER admit that] and he supposed he just wanted to gauge the reaction. He needed to know if Kyuhyun was capable of dealing with it all in a sensible manner or if he had to intervene more than he intended. He would help Kyuhyun in any way necessary, but Kyuhyun had to also be aware that just because he was uncomfortable with others being around him, that did not mean that Yesung had any intention of ending his interactions with the others. It would just be something that Kyuhyun had to get over, though he was confident that Kyuhyun would manage. He had so far seemed able to understand that he had to have some control in that regard. He admits that it may not have been very kind to tease the maknae just then, but he sort of thinks Kyuhyun deserved it. The idiot had not only caused him grief but physical pain as well. It was nothing too serious, but it was still there. He still had to deal with Kyuhyun for his little ambush. The brat would most definitely be sorry!

“Play with me only” Kyuhyun commanded, this time nothing saving him from sounding like a petulant child throwing a tantrum, his voice louder than before, but it just came off as being upset and juvenile, though Yesung was sure Kyuhyun was serious, not just serious but dead serious, positive that Kyuhyun more than likely expected him to only ever play with him going forward, again not very surprised by the statement, nor was he very shocked with Kyuhyun’s reposition of their bodies, the younger man shifting his body so that he practically covered Yesung, only shifting so that he was on his side, fingers grabbing at Yesung's side, fingers digging into his skin in a small dull pain, tugging Yesung until he fit completely in Kyuhyun’s arms, displacing Yesung from his more relaxed positions, completely engulfed by the younger man. Normally he would have smacked him into the next week, but was still conscious of the younger’s predicament and felt sort of guilty for provoking him. He should have known that would be the result. He smiled to himself, Kyuhyun just mainly grabbing at him so unable to really pay attention to him too much. Now that was weird. Kyuhyun was going to great lengths so that they were practically one, the buttons on Kyuhyun’s shirt digging into his skin, the scent of apples so strong he could taste it, so close to Kyuhyun’s throat he could see the small ripples due to his movements, yet the younger man was paying no real attention to him. Kyuhyun was a weird person he decided. He liked strange people.

“You are a selfish brat aren’t you?” Yesung questioned rhetorically laughing at Kyuhyun’s previous statement. He was sympathetic but that did not mean Kyuhyun got a free pass. He would be teased when the opportunity provided itself. The younger man was begging to be teased in truth. Yesung wasn’t even sure if he was teasing to be honest. Kyuhyun was definitely a brat and as far as he could tell, quite selfish at that. Perhaps that was one of the origins of his possessiveness. Kyuhyun really didn’t like him playing with others it would seem. The child really was a selfish brat, always trying to keep him all to himself. Yesung laughed at the cuteness of it all. Maybe he was not taking things as seriously as he should have, choosing to more dismiss the younger’s concerns rather than give it what Kyuhyun would consider to be proper credence. He knew somewhere deep down that Kyuhyun’s issues could never be solved by his words alone. There was nothing he could really say that would help him, but he could stay with him, rest in arms and hope that action spoke louder than words. He needed to assure Kyuhyun that any fear he had was baseless, but was sure that just staying so would be pointless. He had to show him, to let him see for himself. He was determined to hold on to Kyuhyun as long as humanly possible and slowly show him that he never had  a reason to fear, that he could be sure that Yesung loved him and wished to be by his side. Things like that would take time, so all he could do for him then was ease his mind and hold him in his arms. So far it seemed as if it was working.

“You are mine” Kyuhyun stated. Yes, stated. No question or hesitancy in his voice, pulling himself a little away so that he could say the words clearly, eyes travelling to meet Yesung, face stern or as stern as a petulant Kyuhyun could be, the possible effects destroyed by his cuteness in actually saying that to Yesung, nodding his head at Yesung, clearly expecting the older man to accept his claim, smiling in that soft shy way before he stopped staring at Yesung, instead, tugged him into his arms, smothering him into a tight hug, Yesung not sure where Kyuhyun began and he ended, chest properly pressed against Kyuhyun’s, once more feeling the thumping of Kyuhyun’s heartbeat against his chest, an erratic pounding that made Yesung feel tingly all over, the weight of Kyuhyun’s legs all over his own legs, Kyuhyun wrapping their legs together, hand somehow slipping beneath Yesung's body to have both wrapped around him, Yesung pulled onto his side, completely at Kyuhyun’s mercy.

The action is suffocating to be honest, but Kyuhyun is earnest, the hands on his back are strong but delicate, caressing him and loving him, Kyuhyun showering him with feather light kisses anywhere he could reach, swaying their bodies together. Yesung feels as if he is some toy that the child Kyuhyun is promising to ‘love forever and ever and never let go’. It’s just that sort of feeling. He can’t say he dislikes it though. He knows he is more than a new toy to Kyuhyun, positive that whatever emotion Kyuhyun feels is real and strong, just as all his emotions related to the younger man were real and genuine, built from a hope of a future together. He knows better than to mistake Kyuhyun’s childish mannerism as a reason to doubt the sentiments. Kyuhyun may be childish and petulant in the way he chose to say it but he is certain Kyuhyun is dead serious when he says Yesung’s his. Yesung realizes that he has no problem with the statement. His pride wouldn’t allow him to say something like that but he had no problem being ‘Kyuhyun’s’ just as he was sure Kyuhyun wished to be ‘his’. It only ever became a problem if Kyuhyun did something ridiculous. Whilst the child was brash and often idiotic, he always put Yesung's wellbeing and feelings before all else, so he always trusted Kyuhyun to treat him appropriately. Kyuhyun’s need to possess him really wasn’t an issue, just something that Kyuhyun would have to deal with. Yesung promised himself that he would help Kyuhyun along, try to make things easier for the child smothering him.

“I know” Yesung responded evenly, voice tainted with that bit of playfulness, but for the most part he was sincere. He didn’t even feel shy to say it. His pride was hurt a bit, he could admit that, but Kyuhyun was more valuable than his pride by lengths. Those were the words that Kyuhyun needed to hear and as such those would be the words he would utter. He was unwilling to let pride dictate that to him. In that moment Kyuhyun came first. The ownership he was attesting to was different from the basic construction of the words. In his mind it was more like affirming that he loved Kyuhyun and swearing that he would hold true to all the things he had promised to the younger man. He was affirming that he loved him and would always be at his side. There would be nothing to stop him from doing so. That was always his intention. Kyuhyun may choose to say it like that, but he understood the younger’s heart. He was also aware that somewhere in there, was Kyuhyun’s childish need to keep him all to himself. On that point he was willing to indulge the younger. Kyuhyun was adorable and most definitely incapable of harming him. His selfish desire to keep Yesung all to himself came from love and a bit of immaturity. He loved Kyuhyun and he trusted him about all else. He could do whatever it took to make him happy, even if that meant accepting that he belonged to Kyuhyun. Things like that were hard for him to say, but he could do it for Kyuhyun. He did belong to the younger man in a way and had no shame in admitting it, more than willing to say it clearly as he just did.

“Once you do” Kyuhyun rejoined, back to his snarky teasing self, voice bright and energetic or atleast better than it was before, pushing Yesung away so that he could look him in the eyes, a large smirk adorning the maknae’s face, clearly pleased with Yesung's answer, looked quite self satisfied, Yesung rolling his eyes at the sight, though internally stifling the need to coo at Kyuhyun. He just looked so happy then, back to his usual infuriating self. Yesung would have it no other way to be honest, not even upset that Kyuhyun had once more returned to smothering him against his chest, laughing softly but Yesung could hear the happiness threaded through it. He knew Kyuhyun was probably internally gloating that he had just point blank admitted that he belonged to him, positive the brat would hold it as blackmail material in the future, though he couldn’t seem to mind that much, not when Kyuhyun seemed so happy, not when he hugged him like he life depended on it, not when he swayed them side to side in his happiness. He was willing to let it all go to make Kyuhyun happy.

He knew however that it was not completely settled entirely, but the rest was up to Kyuhyun to sort through. He couldn’t help him with those feelings or rather  he couldn’t help till Kyuhyun asked, so in the meantime he would be what he had always hoped to be to Kyuhyun, someone that he could rely on. He smiled in gratitude then, not even upset that Kyuhyun was sneakily pressing kisses to his throat, his hands in a tight grip around him. He allowed Kyuhyun that freedom, deciding that he wanted to show his own appreciation, wrapping his arms around Kyuhyun as well, who naturally just tightened his grip, holding on to him. He Kyuhyun’s hair for him, the angle being weird at the time but trying to let Kyuhyun have his moment, lying in silence against Kyuhyun, though he shifted to once more be on his back, Kyuhyun’s body wrapped around with him once more, the younger man shifting along with him. After a short while, Kyuhyun’s laugher subsided, returning to holding on the older man, both settling their own minds, with the hope that Kyuhyun would settle his issues. They stayed in silence for a while, both enjoying the silence and sorting their thoughts. It was a mature process or atleast that was what it was supposed to be, until Kyuhyun continued to grip him like a hyena and practically suffocated him, rubbing his nose against Yesung’s cheeks, making it hard for him to think.

“If you are feeling better, you should let me go” Yesung suggested with some seriousness. Kyuhyun was practically lying on top of him, his arms holding on to him, wrapped firmly around him, chest pressed against his, head resting on his chest, legs mainly on top of him, trapping him. When had they gotten in such a position? Yesung felt the dig of Kyuhyun’s hands into his sides, the younger being so petty that he never once let his hand stop pawing and gripping at his waist. He was never really amazed at how childish Kyuhyun was sometimes. He would have let him continue but the weight was quite substantial and he was in no way kidding when he said that he was suffocating....well maybe he was exaggerating a bit. Kyuhyun was always careful not to hurt him especially. He doubted Kyuhyun even realized that he was digging into his skin with his hold, and Yesung was not in a lot of pain either. He would tolerate it, even if he would have to deal with a soft bruise. He knew that Kyuhyun was not in the right place as yet to let him go completely. He understood that it was required for Kyuhyun to feel comfortable once more so was willing to allow it, to help him, but at the same time if he could get Kyuhyun to ease some of his weight and give him some breathing room he would appreciate it. That didn’t mean he wanted to be away from Kyuhyun exactly, just that he wanted to have a bit of space. He loved being near Kyuhyun, but he always had that fear of being too close to him. Even then his stomach had fluttery butterflies and his skin tingled a bit. It always made him feel weird. He could live with a bit of space.

“No” Kyuhyun denied clearly, not even waiting a second to shoot down his suggestion, voice clear and affirmative, slightly petulant, but there was nothing to indicate that Kyuhyun had even given him a seconds consideration. Kyuhyun was quite certain that he had no intention what so ever of releasing Yesung. He instead shifted his body. He was aware that comparatively he was much larger than Yesung and feared for a split second that he was squishing the older man. He wanted the older man in his arms, but that in no way meant he wanted him to be hurt by his presence. He shifted his body, releasing Yesung, who had the audacity to sigh in appreciation, Kyuhyun glaring at him from the spot beside him, Yesung just grinning at him. The grin however was destroyed when Kyuhyun reached a hand out and tugged forcefully, Yesung’s face falling  rapidly as his weight shifted, Kyuhyun pulling him bodily until he was slumped on the younger man’s chest, Kyuhyun grinning at him cheekily, Yesung smacking him in frustration, Kyuhyun smirking then, his eyes shining as he continued to tug Yesung along like a play doll, sneakily shifting his hands around the smaller man, keeping him in place on top of him, Kyuhyun actually rather amused at the frustration playing on Yesung’s face.

He was smacked quite hard on his chest; Yesung pinching at his shoulder, Kyuhyun flinching in pain, which Yesung naturally took at advantage off, sliding out of the younger’s grasp. Kyuhyun refused to be defeated however, quickly holding on to the retreating man’s hand, pulling back to rest at his side. He didn’t dare pull him on top of him again, well aware that Yesung hated that, thinking it made him seem feminine, which made Kyuhyun love to do it more. Both of them struggled for a bit, pulling and tugging, until Yesung finally gave in, allowing himself to be held against Kyuhyun’s side, rolling his eyes at the younger but settling at his side, head resting on his shoulder, insisting that his legs be keep away from Kyuhyun, who then deliberately tangled them, Yesung being forced to shift against Kyuhyun, head sliding down to the maknae’s chest, feet tangled, hand resting against his chest, drawing lazy patterns on the shirt covered skin, Kyuhyun reaching a hand across to hold on to Yesung’s side once more.

“What was I thinking agreeing to this? You are so childish!” Yesung disparaged but it was done without any real malice, more teasing than reprimand to be honest, smacking Kyuhyun soundly on his chest as a form of punishment, rolling his eyes in frustration, but he couldn’t help the smile that burst through. It came from his heart and he couldn’t stop it. He was annoyed that Kyuhyun was so freaking childish, but at the same time he supposed it was part of the younger’s charm. It was hard to deal with sometimes but it always made him seem much more adorable than he probably was. Yesung chuckled low in his throat when Kyuhyun poked him in the side, glaring at him for his slight, turning his head away with a shake indicating that he was in strong disagreement.

Instead of verbally punishing him for his slight, Kyuhyun just shifted, pulling Yesung closer to him, the hand on his side firm, getting closer, bending his head to press a few ticklish kisses to his face, Yesung trying to push him off, Kyuhyun stubbornly holding him in place, smirking at him. He grumbled as he struggled, Kyuhyun taking joy in the action, clearly indicating that he was of the opinion that Yesung deserved to suffer for his ill treatment of him, leaning down to blow warm breathes on his earlobe, Yesung’s body shivering from the sensitivity, Kyuhyun giggled with some joy attached, being smacked repeatedly but not caring too much, finally stopping when Yesung threatened to kick him out of the room, in true Kyuhyun fashion sticking his tongue  out at him, snuggling against Yesung comfortably, fingers tapping his body in smooth motions, Yesung sighing in contentment. He didn’t care to fight it anymore. He was always just fooling himself anyway.

No matter how much he tried to stay away from it, or truly to fight it, he knew somewhere deep down that there was never anywhere else he rather be than resting in Kyuhyun’s arms, feeling his fingers curl into his skin, the weight of his head against his own, or the fact that the aroma of apples was now something that made him happiest. He resisted simply to appease his pride and as his one last ditch attempt to protect his heart. Why he thought he still had a chance at salvation was beyond logic really. He loved Kyuhyun more than he would even fathom, completely giving himself to the younger. Any thought that he would save himself was him reaching for a reality that could never exist. He refused to let it go though, decidedly unwilling to accept that he was hopeless, that he was utterly and completely lost to the man holding on to him.

 It was hard to relinquish his own control. When Kyuhyun said he belonged to him, he was horrified at how easily he was willing to accept the claim. Shouldn’t he have some fighting spirit? Shouldn’t he have more pride? He knew he was not property per say, but he was also knew that he belonged to Kyuhyun. The snarky brat already owned his heart and his soul, what else was there honestly? It was all difficult for him to process. He always knew it was like that but always ignored it. When faced with such issues first hand it was hard to just pretend that he didn’t have worries in that regard. He didn’t like to think about it. He was afraid of what it meant for his future, of exactly what he was permitting. He was practically destroying his own self. If or when Kyuhyun finally decided it was not worth it, he would be destroyed if he didn’t try to erect some limitations, yet every time he tried, he was left wondering why he even thought it could be done. Even then all he wanted to do was cling to Kyuhyun as well and make him promise that he belonged to Yesung as well.

Unlike Kyuhyun, he didn’t have the courage to do something like that; instead settling himself with a hand reaching upwards to caress the scarred cheeks, just shaking his head when Kyuhyun lifted an eyebrow, smiling at the younger man, who leaned into the touch. That was the best he could do. He would enjoy each moment, cherish each second. If nothing else he would have his memories. It would never be enough, he knew that, but it would be something precious he could hold on to. He shook his head on instinct, not even having to look at Kyuhyun to know the younger was going to ask if he was alright, impeding the action. He closed his eyes and snuggled in his awkward position, letting Kyuhyun’s little ministrations with his fingers sooth his mind. He would live in the then, enjoy the smiles and even the smirks and he would let the rest remain as they were or he was atleast going to try to.

♥규성♥

A/N: Stay tuned for Part II.