[Chapter 24: Waiting]

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“Dara, your boyfriend’s here!”

Dara looked up from the counter where she was busy stacking up trays of used bowls and utensils, and glanced outside the glass windows. A small smile crossed her face when she saw him standing just a distance away from the entrance, leaning against the steps. Wiping her hands, she began untying her apron and walked towards the staff’s room.

“He’s not my boyfriend, Hyori unnie.”

Dara bashfully quipped as she hung up her apron. She took a quick glance at her reflection in the mirror to make sure she looked fine, then reached into her locker for her bag.

Hyori, her manager, raised an eyebrow playfully as a teasing grin spread across her face. “Yeah sure, whatever you say. Now go on out, don’t keep the poor guy waiting!”

Barely a minute later, Dara bounded out of the café, her brown hair flying freely around her face. She skipped joyfully towards Jiyong, her feet coming to a sudden stop just inches away from him. She raised her head to look at him, lips stretched into a bright smile as her brown eyes twinkled.

“Hi.”

Jiyong looked at her, his lips curving into a small smile.

“Hi.”

He casually raised his hand towards Dara, palm outstretched, as though it was the most natural thing to do. Dara reached out and clasped it tightly, their entwined fingers molding into one. Silently exchanging another small smile, they set off along the graveled pathway, their arms linked tightly like a couple of young lovers.

It had become an unspoken routine for Jiyong to pick her up from work every day. The first time she saw him standing outside the café though, Dara had been so surprised that she could barely focus on her work. Convinced that her eyes were playing tricks on her, she had spent her last working hour trying to catch every possible glimpse of the man, just to see if it really was Jiyong - which then led to the fateful breaking of several cups and a few bowls, much to Hyori’s horror.

But a week had passed since then, and Dara had already grown used to the routine. In fact, she loved it. She loved knowing that he was there waiting for her. She loved the thought of being able to see him the very moment she stepped out of the café’s doors. She loved the way he always reached for her hand so naturally, and how he held it so tightly. And most of all, she loved how they would walk home together, side by side, amidst the warm glow of the setting sun.

It was quite a long walk back home, but neither of them really minded the distance. The road was lined with various stores and little shop houses – once in a while, they’ll randomly pop into a bakery and share a slice of Dara’s favourite cake, or perhaps get ice cream cones from that pushcart just down the road. At other times, they’ll spend the time window shopping, looking at the little interesting trinkets and items displayed along the store front. Either way, the walk home was never boring. It was simple, yet there was something precious about that simplicity that both of them loved.

Today was one of those window-shopping days. Dara was peering into a certain vintage shop house, drawn by the little wooden figures in the display. She was so caught up by the little trinkets that she barely noticed how Jiyong seemed slightly different from usual. Jiyong stood by her side, watching in amusement as she pressed her face against the window like a little kid, struggling to get a clearer view of the display. Contrary to the smile on his face though, was the bout of uncertainty that seemed to be flickering in his dark eyes.

They left the store after a while, and continued their walk down the usual path home. Dara was chirpily humming a little song as she playfully swung their entwined hands to and fro with every step. Jiyong inhaled, breathing in the fresh evening air, and stole a quick look at the girl beside him.  She was beautiful, both in and out, and the past week with her had left him sinking even deeper into these feelings he now recognized as love. For the first time in all his twenty-odd years, he found himself wishing for a normal life, for a chance to be a commoner like everyone else on the streets. He found his mind constantly revolving around the ‘if-onlys’ – if only he wasn’t Kwon Jiyong, if only he wasn’t on a quest for revenge, if only she wasn’t Sandara Park…

If only there weren’t so many secrets lying between them.

He swallowed, and his feet slowly came to a stop on their own accord. Dara looked up at him quizzically, her brown doe eyes wide with curiosity. Jiyong watched her, taking in those innocent eyes that never seemed to judge, eyes that held nothing but pure faith whenever she looked at him. Did he deserve such unconditional trust from her?

No, said a little voice in Jiyong’s head, you don’t deserve it.

And he knew that. He didn’t deserve such trust when he was hiding so much from her. This relationship they now shared had been built up on a wall of lies, lies that threatened to break it all apart if they were ever to be exposed. He had initially expected her to ask, to question him about his past. After all he had told her – about the clan, the way people had died in his hands, about the fact that he was dangerous… he had expected her to want answers. Any normal person would.

But she didn’t. In the past week, not once did she attempt to pry into his past. Not once did she even mention it. And to be honest, he didn’t quite know what to make of it.

“Don’t you want to know?”

He burst out suddenly, his eyes searching hers as he awaited her response.

Dara pouted in confusion, her brows furrowed. She blinked, not quite understanding what Jiyong meant. 

“About…?”

“About me. After what I told you that day, don’t you want to know about my past? About who I am?”

Jiyong pressed on, his voice tight with restrained urgency as he watched her, his heart thundering in his chest. He felt torn, torn between the need to tell her the truth, and the fear of what would happen if he was to do so.

Understanding finally dawned on Dara’s face, and she broke into a gentle smile.

“Of course I want to. I want to know everything about you.”

Jiyong’s heart stopped in his chest. This was it then. He swallowed hard, nodding slightly in response to what she had said. He raised his eyes to meet hers, forcing himself to gain strength from those brown eyes that never failed to give him the warmth he needed.

He inhaled deeply, and tightened his fingers around hers. This was it, there was no turning back.

“Dara, I…”

Soft lips landed on his just then, silencing him before he could say another word. Jiyong blinked, his eyes wide with surprise at the sudden kiss. Dara grinned a little shyly as she stepped back, her cheeks tinted a slight shade of pink.

“I want to know everything about you, Jiyong. But only when you’re ready.”

Jiyong stared at her blankly, her words not quite registering in his mind.

“I don’t want to ask, or to force you to tell me when you’re not ready to. I know you’ll tell me someday when the time’s right, so till then, I’ll just wait for that someday to come.”

Dara said, smiling brightly at him as she spoke.

“You’ll wait… for me?”

Jiyong asked, incredulous.

She nodded, that trademark bright smile of hers never wavering. A small laugh escaped from her lips as she observed Jiyong’s stunned expression. Perhaps it was because he’s been through too much, or maybe the world that he had been living in was simply too cold – whichever it was, what Dara had since come to realize was that Kwon Jiyong wasn’t too used to people being kind to him. Just give the man a little warmth and he’ll melt into a puddle of stunned boyishness. Which, in all honesty, made her want to give all that she had to offer to him.

Dara took a step closer to Jiyong, who was still staring blankly at her, and closed the distance between them. Reaching forward, she wrapped her arms around his waist and snuggled against his chest. A small, contented smile spread across her face as she felt his warmth surround her.

“I’ll always wait for you. So don’t worry! You can just tell me when you feel like it.”

 Jiyong swallowed as he heard her words, his heart beating fast as a rush of emotion surged from within him. No one had ever loved him unconditionally before. No one had stayed by his side, expecting and wanting nothing but to be there for him. Everyone had a motive, a vested interest, a reason of some sort whenever they approached him. But Dara… she was different. And because of her, he was actually beginning to believe that the world wasn’t that bad a place after all.

He raised his arms and wrapped them tightly around Dara’s tiny frame, gently pulling her closer to him as though she was the most precious thing in the world. He leaned forward and kissed her hair, inhaling its familiar sweet, floral scent.

‘Will I ever be ready to tell you the truth?’ Jiyong silently questioned himself as he held her in his embrace. A nagging pang of guilt tugged at his heart. He didn’t want to lose her, he really didn’t. Fear of the unknown future rose within him and he subconsciously tightened his hold around her, not wanting to let her go.

It was dusk, and the sky was falling dark. The streets were now empty, save for a couple of elderly couples strolling leisurely along the cobbled pathway. There they stood under the street light, lost in their own thoughts as they held each other, locked tightly in a deep embrace.

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[Dara’s POV]

Oh no, this is bad.

I gulped as Seungri’s accusatory stare pierced straight through me. Turning away to avert his gaze, I quickly looked down, fiddling with my thumbs absent-mindedly. The air was thick with tension – Seungri had called for an ‘emergency meeting’ or whatever he called it, which explains why the six of us were now seated in a circle at our usual cafeteria table. Given that the rest of them looked pretty clueless, I’m guessing no one but Seungri had any idea as to what was going on. 

Though, well, I probably can make quite a good guess.

“Uhh, can someone explain why we’re all gathered here so early in the morning?” Chaerin broke the silence, her voice tinged with slight annoyance. “I actually skipped first period class for this, you know.”

Bom, seated beside her, nodded in agreement, her eyes wide with curiosity.

“I called all of you here,” Seungri cleared his throat, shifting forward in his seat as he did so. His sharp eyes never leaving the two people sitting directly across him, he rested his arms against his knees and spoke. “…because I need some proper answers.”

Oh crap.

I swallowed, as my heart began to thump faster in my chest. It’s so loud I swear they can all hear it beating. Beside me, Jiyong began to fidget slightly. I stole a quick glance at him from the corner of my eye – he actually looked rather calm with that usual poker face of his, but his constant fidgeting pretty much gave his discomfort away.

“I was on my way to school this morning, feeling rather happy because I just had one of my favourite muffins for breakfast. So I was happily walking, walking, walking… and then I saw something that instantly tainted my innocent eyes.” Seungri spluttered dramatically as he narrated his ‘emergency’, oblivious to the completely irritated expressions on his audiences’ faces. Swiveling sharply to face Dara and Jiyong, he raised his hand and pointed accusatorily in their direction.  “Dara noona, Jiyong hyung…”

“WHY WERE THE TWO OF YOU HOLDING HANDS WHILE WALKING TO SCHOOL TOGETHERRR-“

“Shut up!” I jumped up from my seat and slammed my hand against his mouth, panicking as the rest of the canteen began to look up from their mundane activities, all ears perked for the juicy bits of new gossip. “Are you trying to tell the whole world?”

He stared at me defiantly, mumbling incoherently against my palm as he tried to wriggle away from my grasp. I gave him a quick jab in the gut with my elbow, earning a satisfactory cry of pain from him.  He stumbled back into his seat once I let go, rubbing his stomach and muttering unhappily to himself about violent women as he settled back onto the chair.

I glared at him, my chest heaving from the sudden exertion. The rush of annoyance slowly fused out of me though, when I finally came to my senses and noticed the three pairs of eyes that were now staring at me, wide-eyed.

Oh, how I hate that look. Sigh.

Resigned, I dropped back down onto my seat and lowered my head once again. I could already feel the impending doom that was going to occur – seriously, I could sense that Bom and Chaerin were already about to burst with a tirade of questions to interrogate me with.

And yup, I was right.

“HOLDING HANDS?”

“Oh my god, Dara why didn’t you tell me-“

“YOU HELD HANDS, OH MY GODDD”

“When did this start? So are you two like, dating?”

“Dara how could you not say a thing, I’m your best friend!”

“Have you all kissed? Oh god wait, did you all sleep together-“

“OH MY GOD SO FAST? DARA!”

“How was it, I want detailsss!”

“I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU DIDN’T TELL MEEEEE-“

I sank my face into my hands, letting out a long, inaudible sigh as the two of them went on and on with their tirade. They were really working themselves into a frenzy. Resting my head against my hands, I watched them tiredly, waiting for them to wear themselves out. Knowing the two of them so well, I’ll probably only get a chance to speak when they actually stop to breathe.

Finally.

I straightened up when they finally stopped talking. Their eyes remained as round as saucers as they stared at me, mouth agape, waiting for me to provide them with full details of the story. I sighed, uncomfortably rubbing my neck as I thought of how to best explain things.

“Jiyong and I are not dating, no we did not sleep together, and I didn’t tell you because there was nothing to tell.” I answered all their questions in a sentence, my words flowing out rapidly.

Their expressions showed that they were clearly unconvinced. I glanced at Top in hope of getting some support, but sigh, it seems like even Top doesn’t believe me. In fact, his eyebrows were raised the highest.

“We really aren’t dating.” I stated once again, feeling a little defeated. “At least, not officially…”

The last few words escaped from my lips as a slight mumble. I don’t even know why I said that. Seungri’s sharp cat-like ears caught it immediately, and the moment that stupid grin of his appeared on his face, I pretty much knew I was done for.

“Not officially?” He questioned, eyes full of mischief. “Why not?”

I gulped. That wasn’t really something I could answer. To be honest, the main reason why I had been hiding this from my friends was because it wasn’t something that could be explained. What Jiyong and I share is something so precious yet ambiguous, so much so that even I have no idea what we really are to each other. There’s something special between us, of course, but…

As of now, I don’t really know what we are.

And that’s why I didn’t want to tell them anything. I’m fine with things being ambiguous because I know that Jiyong’s not used to commitment, relationships, or things like that. He needs time. And anyway, I don’t need to have a status right now; I’m fine with how things are actually. But that’s something that most people probably wouldn’t be able to understand, and I definitely don’t expect Bom and Chaerin to. They’re your average girls who live along clear lines when it comes to relationships – just like any other normal female, they need a man to make promises for them to feel secure. They need commitment. So having ambiguity in a relationship probably isn’t something they can accept or understand easily, and I don’t really blame them for it.

If not for the fact that I had met Jiyong, I probably wouldn’t be able to understand it either.

“It’s just… it’s just not.” I sighed. This wasn’t going to go well. “I don’t know how to explain it to you guys.”

I glanced at Jiyong, whose brows were furrowed tightly together. He was his usual silent self, but he was obviously deep in thought and once again, I find myself unable to even guess what he’s thinking about. I just hope he’s not feeling pressured because of the fuss that my dumb friends are kicking up.

“So you’re dating but it’s not official?”

Seungri inquired teasingly. That guy is obviously intent on getting on my nerves today. Even Bom and Chaerin had pretty much backed off by now – they probably could tell I wasn’t really ready to talk about it, but this dumb guy here clearly wasn’t getting the hint.

“We’re not exactly dating…”

“So you just happen to enjoy holding hands with random guys? Here, why don’t you hold mine too, I bet my hands are smoother than hyung’s-“

“I do not go around holding random guys’ hands!”

“So you ARE dating hyung then.”

“I-I… Well sort of, but it’s really nothing official.”

“Ah, I see. So you’re friends with benefits?”

Oh my god, this guy is driving me insane. I swear I haven’t felt this wound up in ages – someone give me some tape please, I need to shut his stupid mouth up before he drives me crazy with all his questions.

“We’re not friends with benefits, that sounds really bad by the way-“

“So what is it then; is Jiyong hyung too much of a wuss to ask you to be his girlfriend?”

I gasped at the audacity of his last retort and shot him one of my most lethal glares. He finally got the message, and slowly slunk back onto his seat in a bid to avert my gaze. Biting my lip in concern, I turned to Jiyong, silently hoping that he hadn’t heard what Seungri just said.

But there, it’s that usual poker face of his once again. That calm, vacant expression that looks perfectly fine on the surface whilst masking the turmoil that lay beneath it. Sigh, at this rate I’ll really need to ask Top to teach me how to read faces. That’s definitely a skill that will come in useful when being around Jiyong.

[Narration]

Bom smiled to herself as she watched the friendly bantering between Dara and Seungri. To be honest, she didn’t really mind not knowing the full details – she knew Dara well; you couldn’t really force her to speak if she wasn’t ready, but once she was, she’ll definitely be the first to share. Anyway, it didn’t take a genius to see that the girl’s been a lot livelier recently, and Bom was willing to bet a million bucks that it’s because of Jiyong.

And as a friend, Dara’s happiness was all that mattered to her. If Jiyong was able to make her happy, then there really wasn’t anything she had to complain or worry about. Dara was a smart girl anyway; she’ll be able to choose what’s best for herself.

But the same thing couldn’t be said for someone else in the room though. Bom bit back a sigh as her gaze fell on Top, who was seated just a short distance away from her. There was a gentle smile on his face as he watched his friends argue, but Bom could see the tinge of pain that laced the corners of that smile. Top had feelings for Dara ; that was something she had figured out a long time ago. And to lose her to his best friend…

Well, Bom definitely knew how that felt, and it wasn’t nice. Her heart ached for him, and it took all her self-control not to pull him into a comforting hug right there and then. Apart from the fact that the rest would probably think she’s gone mad, she knew all too well that Top wouldn’t welcome such a move anyway. For some reason, he just didn’t seem to like her, and he had actually been pretty obvious in expressing his disregard for her all this time. It had hurt at first, and to be honest it still does, but she’s since grown used to that unfriendly gaze of his.

Top turned to look at her, probably because he had felt the intensity of her gaze. Startled, Bom dropped her gaze to her lap, not daring to look up to meet those eyes which she knew, would hold nothing but disdain.

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Another chapter up! :)

Alright, gonna go sleep now before my mum comes out yelling at me about the time haha.

Goodnight everyone, thanks for reading! :)