Five.

BOM

On my 10^th birthday, my parents had given me a sketchpad and a drawing pencil. I’ve always wanted to draw during that age, dreaming I’d become an artist and sell my art someday. I might have even begged for them to enroll me in an art class in addition to the ones I already had at school. But knowing that our family’s tight budget didn’t have funds for such, they refused. Although I also knew that my parents would want me to enhance my talent, too. They loved me and my younger sister so much they’d support anything we put our hearts into. Now that they’re gone, I wonder who could give me that same love my parents gave me—selfless and unconditional.

Anyway, I suddenly missed drawing. I kind of shied away from it when I became a teenager, spending most of those days in…you know, being a teenager. So imagine the huge smile on my face when I rummaged through my box of old stuff and found the sketchpad. Actually, I was surprised at first. I didn’t imagine it would still exist.

I flipped the cover open and I was welcomed by my 10-year-old drawings. Then I flicked the pages faster, looking for untouched leaves. There were still about ten left.

Excitement rippled through me. I will draw again.

About an hour and a half later, in three separate pages of the sketchpad, I had drawn an assortment of flowers in a vase, the view outside my window, and a symbolic graphic. But whilst staring at them, I began to feel something was off. But I knew it wasn’t what they looked like after I finished drawing them. In fact, considering that it had been more than ten years since I did this again, the results were pretty nice.

And then it hit me, I haven’t drawn people.

And I should.

Placing my sketchpad and pencil on my lap, I rolled my wheelchair outside my apartment in a plan to scout for a model. Just as I had closed my door, Seunghyun came into the hallway with a bag of groceries in his arms.

Perfect.

“Hi!” The greeting was too perky for my taste. I must have been really excited. After all, this will be the first time I would actually sketch a human being. I cleared my throat, replacing the perkiness with pleading. “Can I draw you?”

He stopped in his tracks, puzzlement dancing in his eyes. “What?”

“I’m trying to relive a hobby I had when I was a kid,” I clarified. “But I realized I’ve never drawn people. So would you be my model?”

“Uh, okay…I guess.” Seunghyun was reluctant, but I didn’t think it was because he didn’t want to assent to my favor. It was more of like he felt awkward. “Let me just put this inside.” He gestured to his grocery bag.

I waved a dismissive hand. “No, we can do it in your apartment. That way you can still do anything you want. I promise I’ll be in one small space and I will be quiet you won’t even remember I’m there.” I’ve heard of drawing figures in motion in the past. Of course I’ve never done it before. Whether I can do it or not, it will be a true test to my capabilities.

Okay, maybe I couldn’t do it after all. Fifteen minutes later, Seunghyun was able to arrange his groceries, feed his cat, did a little dishwashing, and I…I wasn’t even able to get past the outline of his face.

I groaned loudly. And I know I told Seunghyun I’d be quiet but I just couldn’t help it. I was frustrated.

“Am I doing this whole modeling thing wrong?”

It was so sweet of him think it was him at fault. I cropped up a reassuring smile. “No, Seunghyun. It’s not you. You’re doing perfectly well.”

It’s me.

I was close to giving up. Then again, I really wanted to try this. “Uhm, do you mind if you just stay in one place. Like watch TV on the sofa?”

“Yeah, no problem.”

Drawing Seunghyun with lesser movements was way better than when he was all over his apartment. Until I realized that staring at his face was more than just about sketching him. Sure, I was taking in his features. But not for the paper. For myself.

His long, curly eyelashes made his dark brown eyes all the more striking. His chiseled cheekbones and jaw blended gorgeously with the rest of the parts of his face. And I wonder if he’s aware that his lips were seductive. And inviting.

I suddenly tensed in my wheelchair. Oh, God, no! I cannot think of kissing Seunghyun!

My hands trembled over the sketchpad. But I didn’t let the tip of the pencil touch the paper just yet, afraid that I’d ruin what beautiful art I already had on it.

“For the life of me, relax!” I yelled, willing my hand would listen.

“I’m sorry,” Seunghyun replied, and I snapped my head up to look at him. I noticed he looked a little tensed himself. But that’s probably just because he thought I yelled at him. “I will stay still,” he added worriedly.

“No, it’s not you!” I quickly told him, aghast from my unexpected outburst. And I left it at that. I didn’t want him to delve further as to why my hand trembled, why I became nervous, and then I’d be forced to say that it was because of him.

“This is almost finished,” I added.

And it was in about five minutes. I flitted my eyes from my creation to Seunghyun. They look exactly the same.

I’ve never been prouder of myself. I was in the brink of crying. But I held the tears in.

“Wow,” he remarked when I flipped it over for him to see, his eyes widened in astonishment. “That’s amazing. I mean I’m no art critic, but that’s beautiful.”

I giggled. “Of course you’d say that, it was you after all.”

Seunghyun smiled impishly. “Well, yeah. But seriously, you captured me brilliantly in that drawing.”

“Thanks. And thank you so much for agreeing to this.”

“My pleasure.”

I glanced at his wall clock, finding that it was almost 7:00. “I guess I should go back. Mai would be knocking in my door in a few minutes, and if she doesn’t find me there she’d go berserk.”

Seunghyun laughed. “Yeah. We don’t want Mai going berserk.”

He walked me out of his apartment. But before I completely headed for mine, I told him meekly, “My Friday nights are usually spent on watching movies. If you’re not doing anything this Friday, you are most welcome to join me again.”

Then I felt my cheeks heated up. In embarrassment, that is. What the heck? Did I just invite him in what seemed like to be a date? I instantly wanted to strangle myself with a barbed wire. Give me a freaking barbed wire!

Or maybe not.

“I’ll be there,” Seunghyun replied, grinning delightfully. “I’ll bring popcorn.”

~*~