A/N: After for awhile, i finally updated! Weee! Hahahaha. I’m sorry if i took so long. ^_^

This chappy is dedicated to Miwon407! ^_^

Well... That’s all folks! I don’t know when i could update. Hahahaha. Sorry for that in advance.

Happy Reading!

PS: VOTE AND COMMENT. OR I WON’T UPDATE EARLY. (HAHAHAHAHA ofcourse i’m just joking. XD)

Chapter 9: “That unfortunate night”

"H-hyukjae?"

I managed to call his name out of shock. I quickly wiped the tears on my cheeks.

Infront of me was no other than Lee Hyukjae.

The Lee Hyukjae from my past. The Lee hyukjae that i didn’t see for the past 7 years. The Lee Hyukjae that was once me and my brother’s bestfriend. The Lee Hyukjae... that i once used to like.

I couldn’t believe my eyes. For how many years, i never saw him only until now. He never changed. Except he looked more dashing now.

“Long time no see.” He smiled as he walked towards me and occupied the space beside me.

“It wasn’t like I was the one who didn’t show up my face.” I said with a slight sarcasm in my tone. He didn’t answer. He kept his eyes down. I sighed,

SO SUNGYEON

October 30, 1990 – April 6, 2004

There was silence.

“It has been... 8 years.” He turned to me, and gave me a sad smile.

“8 years of living life without him.” I looked down at the grave.

“I’m sorry if i hadn’t contact you after his funeral.” He placed his hand on my shoulder and gave it a short squeeze.

“I’ll forgive you if you tell me why.” I said,

He sighed, “I’m sorry i can’t. I promised... him,” He pointed at my brother’s grave, “that i wouldn’t tell you.”

“Why? Please Hyukjae.” I started pleading. I know the only one who knows the real reason about my brother’s death was him.

“I’m sorry.” He sighed.

“Did you know i almost went crazy after he died?” Tears started to form at the end of my eyes, “I love him. I love my brother so much. And I’d give anything i have just to have him back...” I swallowed the lump that was forming on my throat, “But... I knew i couldn’t.”

“He loves you. More than himself. That’s why he did it.” I turned to him,

“What did he do? What did he do that made him end up like this?” My voice started to rose. I need answers.

For years, the thoughts about my brother wasn’t clear. It was always a missing part of me. I just need answers.

“It’s... complicated.” He sighed and looked at me. He wiped the tears that rolled down my cheeks unconsciously.

“Just remember. He loved you so much.”

I didn’t pressure him to tell me what was it. Because i know he wouldn’t anyway.

He gave me a smile and he stood up, and after a short minute, he was now out of sight. I didn’t bother to hold unto him. To stop him from leaving. I know there was a reason why the relationship between me and Hyukjae changed. I still don’t know that reason but i know, it can’t be kept as a secret forever.

I turned back to the grave, and memories started to flashback once again in my mind. Those times he was still alive. Those times that he was still by my side...

“I hate you, you know?” I sobbed, “I hate you for leaving me alone. I could’ve been happier if you were here. You left me. You left me.” I covered my face with my palms.

Being all alone made me remember that night... the night we received the phone call... the night that changed my life.

-FLASHBACK-

“Hello?” Mom answered the phone immediately. She started to panic when she knew my brother wasn’t home yet.

It was unlikely of him to go home late. When he came to my classroom earlier to tell me that he might be a little late to go home, i knew there was something that was bothering him. Just by judging his face.

My brother was always cold. But not to me. He would open his heart to me.

“WHAT?” Mom suddenly yelled. My hands started to tremble also. Without answering back, she hung up and stared at me in disbelief.

Without her noticing, tears started b down her face. Dad hugged her and we quickly went to the hospital were the stranger said where my brother was.

During the whole ride, mom was in rage. She was getting wild. Dad tried to calm her down, but she didn’t listen.

And me? I couldn’t feel anything. I felt numb. At that instant, i felt my heart slowly closing away and hiding itself from all possible feelings i might have. Tears won’t even roll down. I felt cold.

When we arrived there, my brother was already in his room. All sorts of wires and machines attached on his body. Mom can’t stop crying. And dad, was speechless. He didn’t know what to say.

I, on the other hand, slowly walked and sat beside his bed. Dad pulled mom out for a moment to stop her from getting wild once again. So, i was left alone.

I kissed his forehead and lied down beside him. There was silence. There was peace. The only sound was that stupid machine going “teet teet teet” thing.

For two weeks, i kept on coming back at the hospital. Each day, hoping and expecting my brother talking, eating and playing with me. But each of the day, i also end up disappointed.

Until, one day,

“I’m sorry.” From afar, i heard the doctor say to mom. I couldn’t read mom’s expression.

After the doctor left, mom slowly sat in the corner, hopeless.

I quickly ran into her, “Mom, what’s wrong?” I was about to go in my brother’s room when my mom held me,

“Y-yeonsu... There’s something mom wants t-to tell y-you.” Mom’s tears started to roll down.

From that moment, i felt scared.. Don’t tell me...

“W-what is it mom?” My legs started to weaken and at the same time tears are threatening to fall. But i held it all in. I don’t want to look weak infront of my mom.

I looked away, “I need to go see oppa first.” But her grip tightened. I looked at her,

“H-he’s not there.” Mom said, her voice hoarse from crying, “H-he’s already a-at t-the morgue.”

Morgue.

Morgue.

Morgue.

Morgue.

The place kept on repeating in my mind. Morgue? Why? What is he doing there?

I smiled bitterly at her, “Why? Why is oppa there? Did he wake up already?” I tried to sound hopeful. Though i know the answer to it already, NO.

“Y-yeounsu..”

“Tell me, oppa woke up already, right?”

I know right now i looked pitiful. I was like pleading for her to lie to me and just tell that ‘it’s just a joke. Your brother is awake now’. But i know, it’s too impossible.

“I-i’m sorry. The doctor said he only has 5% chance of waking up. And we lost our hope... So, w-we,” She couldn’t continue her words.

And it all felt like 1000 needles piercing through my body and heart. I smiled bitterly,

“So you unplugged the machine that was the only reason for him to live?” I said, like it wasn’t even hurting. She nodded. And i stared at her bewildered.

I shook my head and turned my back. Mom kept calling me but i didn’t respond. I walked. I left the hospital. I didn’t even went to see him lying in the place where all lifeless people do. I didn’t want to see him there in the morgue.

I walked towards the playground. And i cried my heart out there. Those cries that i tried to held in for the past two weeks. And the only difference when i cry today, was there is no more Sungyeon oppa to comfort me.

"Why are you crying? Are you lost or something?" I stared at the stranger infront of me.

-END OF FLASHBACK-

*Choi Siwon POV*

After i’ve done telling them everything, their reactions looked like a storm passed by. It can’t be painted.

“So- wait, Let me summarize, So Yeonsu is your wife. You married her BEFORE debut because of both of your parent’s wishes. Lee Soo Man already knew about this. You have a child who is 6 years old. And now, she wants to have a divorce,” Leeteuk said.

I nodded.

“It’s your fault, stupid!” Shindong smacked my head which made me groan in pain.

“What the! I know it’s my fault! Is the hitting really necessary?” I complained. The manager could only laugh.

“So much necessary.” He said and hit me again in the head.

“Why did you treated her that way? She’s your wife for pete’s sake!” Leeteuk said.

“I know hyung. That’s why i’m trying to fix our relationship now.”

“You love her?” The manager spoke. It silenced me. Do i love Yeonsu? “If you don’t, then why don’t you want to leave her? Because come to think of it, your life as a celebrity will be much easier if she leaves you, don’t you think?” He said, “You can date whoever celebrity you like. Your reputation as an idol will be protected..”

“but i don’t want her to leave me.” I found myself saying these words.

“Why?” Manager asked again.

“err.. I don’t know...” I ruffled my hair.

“You want us to help you?” Sungmin said,

“Yes.”

“Then tell us why you don’t want to her to leave you.” Donghae replied.

I sighed.

“I don’t know. Really. Yes, we fight often. Yes, i ignore her most of the days. But living my life without her, i feel empty.”

After the short silence, Leeteuk hit me again in the head.

WAAA! What do they think of me? A Punching bag? REALLYYYYY!!

“Then you love her stupid!” He commented.

Yes, maybe i do love her... And i have to do everything for her to not leave me. Even if it means risking my image as an idol.

A/N: VOTE and COMMENT! :)