Jaejoong’s POV

                  Hello! My name is Kim Jaejoong. Or more accurately, I’m Jung Jaejoong, married to my husband Jung Yunho. Yes we are both guys. Despite our parents’ disapproval, we got married without their consent. We are living together now, just the two of us, in this huge mansion by the sea. Life seems so perfect for us that it is almost hard to believe that it is real.

                  Today was just like any other morning, I wake up to find my handsome husband in my arms, sleeping peacefully. The streams of yellow beams make his tanned skin glow. I used the tip of my fingers to trace his perfect face. From his forehead, to his closed eyes, to the outline of his nose, to his beautiful heart-shaped lips, and finally, to the edge of his chin. I smiled in content as I his face gently.

                    Yunho slowly opened his eyes and stared at me with a warm smile on his face.  I smiled and greeted him “Good morning”. But just like always, he doesn’t reply. Oh well, I’ve gotten used him not replying me, his presence is enough. We washed up and went downstairs to have breakfast. I gathered a few ingredients and start to make breakfast. Due to the lack of ingredients, I could only fry a few pancakes with blueberry sauce. I guess I should head to the grocery store. Yunho and I ate in a comfortable silence, occasionally broken by the sound of leaves rustling.

                   “Should we go to the grocery store?” I asked Yunho. He nodded cutely and quickly finished his pancakes. I chuckled at his child like behavior. Both of us got dressed after putting away the dishes. I wore a plain, tight, white v-neck tee with dark blue denim jeans while Yunho wore a plain tight black shirt with light blue jeans, emphasizing the perfect curves of his muscles. We got into my Ferrari as I drove to the nearest grocery store.

                   A while later we arrived at the grocery store. Fortunately it wasn’t very crowded. I pushed the cart as I held hands with Yunho. His big hands seem to fit well around my small ones, they make me feel protected somehow. After buying all the necessary items, I proceeded to the cashier. The cashier lady, who is in her mid 20s, stared at me and Yunho weirdly. I don’t know what’s wrong with her. “Miss?” I asked to gain her attention. She snapped out of her daze and helped me scan the items. I quickly paid and left.

                   We drove back home and sort out the ingredients. We put the frozen food in the fridge, and the others in the cupboard. After that, Yunho and I started to clean the house, a usual routine. Both of us love music, so we will sing while doing housework, making the boring chore bearable.  Soon after, the burning, scorching afternoon sun greeted us, as if telling us it was time to have our lunch.

                   After lunch, both of us sat in the living room, watching the television. Yunho and I don’t have to work because my family is well off, with a brother that is currently managing a famous company in the country. They would send sufficient money to us every month, and they paid our water/electricity bills as well. Even though they disapprove of our marriage, I’m glad that they still treated me as part of the family.

/Flashback/

                   “Mom, dad, this is my boyfriend, Yunho.” I introduced him to our parents. They were in utter shock as their mouths fell open. An awkward silence filled the air. “Jaejoongie, I thought you are bringing a girlfriend home? Why… is…  Yunho?” My dad stuttered. I realized that I’ve never told them I was gay so when I told them I was dating they assumed my partner would be a ‘she’ and not a ‘he’. “Jaejoongie you are a guy. Guys aren't suppose to love each other!" My mom exclaimed. "I don't care if I'm not allowed to, but I love Yunho more than anything in this world." I argued. "Yes Auntie, I love Jaejoong more than my own life. I am willing to marry his even though we are both guys." After a moment of silence, my mom sighed. "I know you two love each other, and I won’t stop it. But that doesn’t mean I’ll officially accept Yunho as my son-in-law and the fact that you want to marry a man"
                  
                  She hesitated, before speaking. “If you two insist on being together, I’ll give you two choices. One, you two can live at our family’s private villa at the beach. We’ll provide all your living expenses. Two, leave each other. Sorry Jaejoongie, we cannot let the public know that the son of the famous Kim family is gay.” She then turned to Yunho. “Sorry Yunho ah, please understand our decision. Sorry I couldn’t be a nice mother-in-law that will love you like her own son.” Yunho, being the kind hearted man he was, reassured to my mom that no one will ever find out about our relationship and we will move to the villa. The very next day we moved out.

/End of flashback/

                   After what seemed like hours, night has finally come. I lay on Yunho’s chest as we watched some movies. I can feel his heart beat; it was like a soothing lullaby. Knowing that this heart beats for me, I smiled in content as I drifted off to sleep.

/In Jaejoong’s dream/

                   “Jaejoong ah..” Yunho whispered my name with the deep baritone voice that I missed so much. I looked around, searching for Yunho, but all I see was a dark field of Poppy and violets. “Yunho? Where are you?” I screamed frantically.  “I’m … … here any… … up” his voice got softer and softer, until I could barely hear anything. I started screaming.

/End of  Jaejoong’s dream/

                   I woke up screaming for Yunho as I felt a soft thumping of the heart. I looked up and found Yunho sleeping. I think I must have dozed off last night and Yunho brought me to the bedroom. Beads of sweat traced the sides of my face and drops onto my pajamas. Yunho won’t disappear without telling me, right? I reassured myself that it was just a bad dream and I was too paranoid. I trust my husband after all. I caressed his face. “Yunho ah, we’ll be together forever right? Even if the inevitable forces threaten to separate us, we’ll face it together right?” I whispered as I planted a gentle kiss on his forehead.

                   I went to the bathroom and splashed my face with cold water. Still thinking of the dream I had last night, it happened for quite some time. I still remember in the very first few dreams, I was standing alone in the same field that haunted me. Yunho appeared in my dreams, right in front of me, but no matter how loud I shouted, he stared at me with a deathly expression. When I reached for him, my hand passed through him. As the days went pass, Yunho’s image faded. Once in a while I hear him whispering incoherent words… that was all.

                   Days passed, weeks passed, months passed. Time just slips by without us realizing. Like the usual routine, I lay in Yunho’s muscular arms as I slept with a smile on my face.

/In Jaejoong’s dreams/

                   I was again standing in that field. However, there is an ominous feeling in the air. Suddenly, Yunho appeared in front of me. “Jaejoong ah, I’m not here anymore, wake up. I’m just a figment of your imagination. Stop drowning yourself in this pool of darkness. You, my angel, should not be here.” I froze, what does Yunho mean..? Before I could ask, he disappeared.

/End of Jaejoong’s dream/

                   I sat up in bed, panting. I looked around and to my horror, Yunho wasn’t in bed anymore. I frantically jumped out of bed as I screamed for Yunho. “Yunho where are you?” I shouted, but no one responded. I searched the entire villa, but Yunho wasn’t there. I searched the beach and he wasn’t there. Maybe… Yunho went out to buy something? Yes maybe that’s it. I shall just wait at home. I waited and waited, but Yunho never came back. “Yunho ah.. where are you? Do you hate me so much? I need you. I thought you promised that we’ll be together forever? Is this what they meant by ‘promises are meant to be broken’?” I thought as I made my way to the kitchen. “Lies… Everything was a lie?” I grabbed a knife that I saw on the rack. “Yunho ah, I really can’t live without you. I will go find you, even if it takes an eternity.” I felt a sharp pain in my chest as I felt the life seeping out like the blood from the wound.

Third person POV

                   A family knelt down in front of a large tombstone, crying their hearts out. “I knew it was a bad idea to send him alone to that villa.” A crying voice echoed in the wind. “He wasn’t even mentally stable and yet we left him alone. My poor Jaejoongie…”

The tombstone was divided into two parts, one for the husband and one for the wife.  

“Jung Yunho                                    Jung (Kim) Jaejoong

28^th December 2010                     28^th December 2011

May these two lovers rest in eternal peace, side by side”
 

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END.

Yay so the fic has ended! I still think its kinda short X.X

Some meanings:
Violets – In ancient Rome, symbolizes mourning.
Poppy – A flower that is usually associated with death.


If you are confused about the ending, there is a major hint in the title that shows what Jaejoong is suffering from. As to why Yunho ‘disappeared’, he was never there in the first place. After Yunho passed on, Jaejoong buried himself in depression, thus the title. Hope that clears up the confusion if you guys had any! Do leave me some comments so that I can improve. Thank you for taking your time to read this, really appreciate it.