Beautiful is defined as having qualities that delight the senses, especially the sense of sight.

 

Perfect is defined as lacking nothing essential to the whole.

 

Looking upon that boy that sat at the far back of the classroom, drifting off into his own little word, the words beautiful and perfect that I learned of, felt and believed in till now have all changed because of that one teenage boy.

 

As I watch him from a far, I always wondered what went through his unspoken mind. He never talked unless he was asked to, and he never looked unless he was spoken to. His sharp dark chocolate eyes could pierce through your very soul and can open the true person you were. Then does that mean I was a e and creep for taking an unhealthy interest in him? Possibly so…

 

The sunlight that penetrated through the clear windows hit his smooth skin making it glisten slightly. And last but not least, his jet black silky tussled hair made him oh-so y. Okay, I really have become a ert, but I can’t help myself. My eyes are magically drawn to his direction unconsciously.

Every day in the hallway, I would always notice his presence from the rest. Even when he was huddled closely with a bunch of boys, which I hated a lot for touching him; he would be the only person I could see with my own two eyes. From all the things I have seen, he was the most beautiful, exotic and perfect creature I’ve ever laid eyes upon.

 

This boy was ruining my life.

 

He truly was.

 

And yet, I don’t feel unsatisfied by it.

 

It’s been months since I had been closely observing the boy. And from the many rumors that passed through the hallways, I learnt bits and pieces of information on him. Thank the lord for having such things as gossips.

 

Huang Zi Tao surprisingly had an English name, Edison Huang. Would it be too weird to call him Edison during class? Maybe it would be since no one ever called him that, but I really had the wants to call him Edison just once. He was also master of wushu and well known for his very conservative personality. I also found out he born of May 2.

 

To be honest, I secretly slipped him a little present among with the other presents of fan girls. Due to my low income from teaching I was only able to get him this fluffy panda plushie. That panda plushie reminded me of him, a lot actually. So I got myself one too so I could sleep with it… … … Nothing weird at all…

 

Tao was famous for his icy glare and talent in martial arts. I’ve only seen him do it once, because his friends forced him to as a service for the girls that begged the boy and his friends. Though I was annoyed that they made him do something he didn’t want, I was also very thankful.

 

The strong and powerful gracious movements had sent goose bumps throughout my body. The fast motions of the flips and turns made my eyes widen and jaw drop, the same went for all the other students. He was very skilled. And with the concentrated expression that he couldn’t show in my class made my heart beat pulse through the sky. Elegant, beautiful, exotic, gracious and perfect Tao, I was ever so grateful to God for setting such a marvelous creature before my life.

 

Right then and there, I was in love.

 

I was in love with my student.

 

I fell for Huang Zi Tao, a kungfu panda.

 

And I had fallen too deep that I could never climb myself back out.

 

With the tidal waves of emotions running through my body, I couldn’t hold out and longer. It was finally time to take action. Finally time to claim that handsome boy as mine!

 

“Huang Zi Tao.” I said in a stern voice during class.

He turned his gaze towards me, “Yes sir?”

“Is my lesson that boring that you’d prefer to look outside the window?” I raised my eyebrows, and said, “If you want, I could organize a lesson with a tree to teach you English if you want.”

“No sir, I’m sorry.”

My heart began to race, contemplating whether to say this or not. Maybe I’m being to rash? Damn it, Kris! Why are you a coward? I shouted in my mind. I tried to swallow my saliva, and said, “Please see me after class.”

 

Oh god, it’s all over now. No turning back…

 

 

***************************

 

 

After class had ended, Tao waited behind as all the other students left. He was silently sitting at his desk, scribbling on his notebook, waiting for me to call upon him after I had finish packing up my belongings.

 

“Come to my office, please.” I said, and he nodded in reply.

 

The walk seemed like an unending path. The awkwardness made me feel really uncomfortable, and possibly Tao felt it too. Now I was really debating with myself whether this was a great- plan or not. I recalled all the self-improvement and inspirational books I read. Jim Keller once said, “Say what you want to say when you have the feeling and the chance. My greatest regrets are the things I did not do, the opportunities missed and the things unsaid.”

 

If I don’t do this now, then maybe I really would regret the opportunities that I could not take for granted. Jim Keller, who once quoted this inspirational quote, too had regrets because he couldn’t take the chances laid before him, and the silent words and opportunities that he could never say or do became a mystery that consumed him. I, for one, did not want that to happen to me. But hey, I could become famous if I made my own quote like him.

 

However, what if things turned out great? Could Tao possible have the same feeling for me? I really doubt it though, since I’ve never seen the said boy take a single glance at me. Not even a “hi” or “have a good day, Mr. Wu Fan”, which made the chances of him having any sort of attraction to me be a big fat zero.

 

Perfect…

 

As we reached my office, I unlocked the door and we both entered inside. I motioned him to sit in the arm chair in front of my desk. After I sat down in my chair, I ruffled through his records, my eyebrows slightly creasing together.

 

“Tao, it seems that your grade for English is slipping,” Clearing my throat before looking at him seriously, “Is there any problems with my teaching?”

            “No sir.” He replied, looking down on his lap.

“Is there any particular reason why you are not paying attention in my class?” Or not looking at me? I asked curiously.

The teen bit his lips and shook his head.

I heaved out a heavy sigh, “You know you could tell me. I am your teacher after all.”

He shook his head again.

            “If you are failing English, I need to move you to another class.” I told him. All parts of my body hoped he didn’t. The reason being is that I could still have him in my class, so I could still look at him. Yeah, Kris… I mentally slapped myself; put your own desires over your student’s education.

“I don’t want to move out of your class,” Tao argued, “I like you very much… … Y-you’re an excellent teacher...”

 

Wow, my heart totally just stopped beating for a second there. I felt something caught up in my throat. My breathing became incoherent as my heart raced till it felt like it was about to explode any second now.  He liked me? Setting the “you’re an excellent teacher” on the side for the moment. Tao said he really liked me? I heard it right, didn’t I? I heard that the kungfu panda Tao liked me very much.

 

Oh glorious Jim Keller, thank you for your words of wisdom! I couldn’t suppress my happiness anymore, and a big creepy smile crept on my face.

 

I quickly pushed myself up off the chair, nearly stumbling over my own feet. Tao watched me with confusion. My mind wasn’t clicking right at this very moment. Pretty sure I was going mental. I yanked him up from the chair by the arm, and my arms instantly wrapped themselves perfectly around his thin waist. Without thinking about the long and short term consequences, I did what I had always dreamed about. What I had always wanted.

 

I crashed my lips onto his irresistible lips.

 

The electrifying jolts of pleasure travelled through every inch of my body. Our lips locked into one perfect puzzle. This moment felt so right, so perfect. Our worlds were colliding into one. We became the other missing halves to each other’s puzzle. I was his yang, and he was my yin. The inevitable fate that pulled us together, I had to do anything to take advantage of it.

 

I could feel the strong pressures against my chest as he tried to push me away, but to no avail. The harder that he pushed, the stronger I pressed our lips together and eventually he caved in. I lightly bit his soft tasty lips, which he let out a small groan. His lips slightly parted, and I took my chances to forcibly push my tongue all the way inside his mouth. I pulled my hand up, and cupped it around his neck, pushing his head further into mine. A soft moan escaped between his lips as my tongue connected together with his.

 

This time with all his might, he had managed to push me away, making me fall a few steps back. The boy quickly covered his mouth, eyes widened. In that moment that he froze up, I could see it in his dark chocolate orbs, that little spark that said he didn’t hate it, and that he wanted more. But he seemed too scared to admit it to himself.

 

However, maybe forcing a kiss on him wasn’t the greatest option because I could tell from his lack of experience that it was his first kiss. Who would want to remember that their first kiss was forced upon by some man, especially by their own English teacher?

 

Tao, who stood there in shock, was beautiful, too beautiful. No words in the English or Chinese dictionary can describe his absolute perfection. And no words can describe my unending desire that lusted for him.

 

Desires are hard to control. They are an evil emotion that consumed every conscience and moral standards that you every held and lived by. Hell, I threw all away mine when I kissed him. I wanted him, and I had to steal those precious lips. I had to steal it before anyone else did. Just thinking of Tao with someone else made me burn with angry and jealous inside. The desires that scorched in my heart pushed my actions to the extreme, and I could have possible cost our good relationship.

 

 

 

As I approached closer to him, he backed away, eyes full of fear. I think I really did go too far as to kiss him. He must think I’m disgusting for kissing him, for loving him… As I reaching my hands out towards Tao, the latter coward in fear as he backed further away from me till he reached the door.

           

“Tao…” I called; an aching pain clenched my heart.

 

And in an instant, a tear drop slid down his face and the boy quickly escaped, leaving me all alone in this dark room. Tao, who was so close to me, was now so far that I could no longer reach him, no matter how much I run. It was cold inside my office now, so icy cold and I was so lonely.

 

But with that deep and passionate kiss, by stealing your lips, I had to engrave a memory that the both of us can never forget.

 

“Tao,” I sadly whispered, “I love you so much.”

 

 

 

**********************

 

 

The next following day, I decided to make it right.

 

I literally had no sleep yesterday. For the whole night I was arguing with myself about the situation between Tao and me, as well as crying over my first heartbreak. To leave it or to make it right and of course it was to make it right. If I left it, these uneasy feelings would eat me up inside. Relationships should never be left at a terrible state.

 

With that kiss that I poured all my love into, I had had made it that he would never forget me. Be it a good memory or a nightmare, as long as he would remembered my name, I wouldn’t care. After all, I loved him to the point of no return.

 

To get rid of the soon to be awkward relationship, I would make an excuse for my inappropriate behavior. I wouldn’t want Tao to hate me. I had my say, and he had his. Tao didn’t love me, and that was all to it. It was the end of this whole chapter for my love life. And yet, it hurt so much. I felt the brim of my eye become watery. Pain is inevitable in life, you can’t control it. At this very moment, I somehow wished I could control it.

 

Damn it, Kris, I shouted inside my head to control these damn tears from falling, you are 22 now! Don’t cry in front of your students… You’ll look pathetic.

 

The school bell rang.

 

Lesson began as usual, but what was odd was that Tao was looking at me now. Not out the window like he usually did, but at me. Did I have something on my face? Was he secretly cursing me for what happened yesterday?

 

With all the courage and willpower I could muster up, I said to him, “Tao, please see me in my office after class. There is something I need to speak to you about.”

Tao nodded and smiled to me.

 

Wait a minute…

 

He smiled?

 

To me?

 

He smiled to me?

 

Is Tao on drugs, or am I on drugs?

 

Deep in the pits of my stomach, I felt a bit scared. But it was a nice change. He didn’t seem too awkward with me, and now he’s paying attention to me. Isn’t this what I always hoped for? There must be a catch. Everything always had a catch. He probably has a plan to murder me for what I had done to him.

 

 

 

**************************

 

 

A light tap knocked on my door.

I coughed and straightened myself up, fixing my hair before I said, “Come in.”

            “You wanted to see me, sir?” He smiled at me once again. Oh God, he’s too beautiful. Damn it Tao, what on Earth are you doing to me?

“About yesterday…” I rubbed on my back of my neck, “Please forget everything that happened.”

            Tao stared at me, bewildered, “What?”

“My actions yesterday were inappropriate and I apologize.”

            “Are you seriously?” The white complexion of his face turned into a deep red, his body was trembling by the second.

“I’m really sorry.” I bit my lips, and looked away.

            “I-I can’t b-believe you…” He chocked out.

 

As I looked back at him, I could see endless streams of tears travelling down his face. The site made my heart ache once again. I never meant to make him cry, nor did I ever want to see him cry.

 

“Tao, what’s wrong? Why are you crying?” I frantically asked.

            “Are you really asking me that?” The boy shouted, “How could you expect me to forget my first kiss?”

“I’m really-”

He quickly injected, sobbing as he said, “I-I don’t want your sorry…. All I-I ever wanted was-” Before he could finished, he ran out of the room.

 

Everything was happening too fast for my brain to process. But somehow my feet began to move on their own. They began running after him.

           

“Tao!” I shouted in the empty hall way.

           

With no answer, I tried once again, “Tao!”

 

I felt a painful jab from behind my back, then a thud. Instantly turning around, I faced Tao, who was panting and crying at the same time. I looked on the floor and there lying on the ground was his notebook. The front cover read ‘English’.Why did he throw this at me?

 

“Read it.” He hissed, angrily whipping his tears away.

 

Not understanding why, but my brain told me I had to do what he said or he would kick my with his wushu. I picked up the book and flipped through the notebook that he pegged at me. So many bolded words written in dark black ink that stood out like neon signs. I didn’t know whether to cry, jump out of the window so I could fly to heaven, or kiss Tao.

 

Endless scribbles filled the blank pages:

 

Page 1, dated back in 03/11/2011:“I fell in love with my teacher.”

 

Page 2, dated back in 03/23/2011:“I love Wu Fan.”

 

Page 4, dated back in 04/30/2011:“My love for Wu Fan is undying.”

 

Page 7, dated back in 07/03/2011:“I love Wu Fan.”

 

Page 9, dated back in 09/23/2011:“Mr. Wu Fan looks so y today.”

 

Page 10, dated back in 10/06/2011:“I hope you would notice my feelings for you one day.”

 

Page 12, dated back in 11/29/2011:“Please take away this aching pain and hold me in your arms. Though I may know wushu, I am weak when you are around...”

 

Page 15, dated back in 01/15/2012:“I love Wu Fan.”

 

Page 20, dated yesterday, 06/22/2011:“Kiss me more… I want your everything.”

 

 

“What is this, Tao?” I asked, shocked.

            “Mr. Wu Fan, I thought you were smart.” He smirked as he stalked closer to me.

I looked into his eyes, his oh-so mesmerizing eyes that were slight red. “I love you.” Tao whispered in my ears, sending shivers down my spine. “I love you oh-so much.”

 

That’s it!

 

These many feelings that were exploding from within me were indescribable. I couldn’t hold it in anymore. This boy was slowly killing me from the inside. I grabbed his hand and pulled him with me, shoving him into my office.

           

“Do you really mean it?” I spoke in clear English.

 

“Yes,” He replied, “I love you, Mr. Wu Fan.”

 

Tao pulled me closer to him; he wrapped his long arms around my torso, as he crashed our lips together. Once again, it sent electrifying pulses through my body. Right now it doesn’t seem like reality, like I was dreaming. I felt like I was on cloud nine, this moment was pure and absolute bliss.

 

Tao was beautiful.

 

He was really perfect.

 

And I love him so much.

 

The words beautiful and perfect that I learned of, felt and believed in till now have all changed because of my one and only kungfu panda, Tao.

 

The boy broke the kiss, leaving us panting for air. His strong hold around my waist tightened, as he snuggled his head between my shoulder and neck. I gently wrapped my hands around his waist, pulling him even closer as if we were about to merge into one body. The boy’s hot breath against my shoulder melted all my uneasy feelings away. Now I knew that I feelings were both mutual. He loved me, and I loved him. Without realizing it, he loved me from the very start, but I was blinded by my insecurity. I could feel the corners of my lips arching up into a smile. Time felt like my friend as it seemed to slow everything around us into a picture perfect moment.

 

This was a memory that we would never ever forget.

 

It was just a beginning in a new chapter of our lives.

 

Tao’s melodic voice sweetly rang in my ears. The words that were spoken from his heart left me at complete euphoria.

 

 

 

 

“I love you to the end of infinity.”

 

 

 

**********************

 

Sorry… It was pretty bad… 3,000+ words of complete -ness. LOL.

Hope this could fulfill some Taoris feels anyone might have. ROFL

Now it’s time to wait for my laptop to be fixed so I can finish/write my other stories. (:

 

Or I might eventually come up with another one-shot when I wait for my laptop to be fixed. ^^

I had one HUNHAN one-shot on my laptop……. But I can’t access it when my laptop won’t turn on….

So, I have written a new one on my mum’s computer! :D But I don’t know if I should put it up…/sigh

I’ll think about it…

Anyways, thank you for reading! (: