My Regret

You wouldn’t have imagined “him” the guy you’ve been crushing on for so long would leave you. He was like the perfect guy that every girl would love to have by their side, while you secretly admire him other girl confess their love for him.

You regret not telling him the truth, in your whole life the only thing you remorse the most was the fact that he was your bestfriend and yet you did not say one word about your feeling for him. The two of you were very different in many ways, he was popular but you were just a normal girl who no one cares about.

 He was the only that came and talk to you on the first day of kinder garden, the one who was there for you when you got rejected by your first love in sixth grade, he was the one who bought you the most beautiful necklace for your 16^th birthday, he was the one that comfort you when your parent divorce, he was the one who always by your side and doing everything with you.  

On his 18^th birthday, he invited you to his birthday like every other year, you were planning to confess to him on that night but when some girl in your class confess to him and kiss him in front of everyone you should have pull them apart and tell him you love him for the past 6 years since the day he told you that no matter what other think of you to him you’ll be the most beautiful girl but you didn’t instead you ran away and apologize the next day saying that you had a headache and needed fresh air.

You regret not telling him when you found out he had lung cancer last stage and that he only has about a year left but instead you just cry in his arm while saying his name.  That night he had hold you in his arm while you burry your head in his chest taking in his sense and holding on to him like if you let go he might disappear at that moment.

You finally manage to build up your courage and confess to him the day after that yet you still regret that you had confess to him after such a long time.

 It had been almost a year since you’ve been together with the person you love the most in the world and it was the best time in your life. You love all the moment you spent with him, all the sweet moment you guys have and all the kisses you guys give to each other, all the laughter you guys share and all the night when you and him sit on his sofa and just hug each other close while thinking that the missing piece of your life is finally in your arm.

Until one night when you had your usual part time job at the cake shop just down the road from your house, you were just waiting for him to pick you up like usual when you got the phone call from the hospital. You ran all the way to the hospital while praying that nothing happen to him, when you got to the hospital you were sweating and panting asking for the room that he was in.

There he was lying on the bed, he looks like an angle your angle, you walk closer to him and kneel down next to the bed, you took his hand in yours and whispered his name but there was no reponse. You didn’t want to believe the truth so you whispered his name again and again until you finally broke and hug him close to you while screaming out his name.

Now here you are sitting next to his grave under the rain crying and regretting all that time he been there yet you only confess to him a year ago and hating yourself for not telling him earlier and angry at him for leaving you just like that. As tear run down your face you’ve finally realise that you are the most stupid and coward person in the world.

Regret is the only word that seems to be in your mind when you think of “him” the missing piece of your puzzle, Luhan. 

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