My jaw dropped to the fact that a teen idol was within an arm’s length distance of me let alone a boy teen idol wearing pink lipstick. Even when you live in Seoul, the Korea’s capital of movies, music, and fame, the celebrities you see are actually behind a projecting screen or shielded by red ropes and built body guards.

“So, like this is an authentic autograph? You are really Choi Sooyoung?” I asked, saying my words slowly and carefully, embracing the fact that this could be worth hundreds, if I sell it to the Choi Sooyoung fan club correctly.

“I gave you one because I knew you would NEVER sell anything like this. You know, keeping the memory we just had in the grocery store.”

His last statement made me feel guilty for wanting to sell the personalized autograph he gave me. Well, I did receive two; one for me and one for Tiffany. So maybe if I were to ‘accidentally’ sell Fany’s autograph online…

“Yeah, your friend will surely be happy and grateful for you when she gets that autograph!”

Fine, you win. I won’t sell the autograph, Mr. Choi Sooyoung!

The awkward silence was broken when the Super Mario Bros theme song started to play. Why the hell would I put that on my stereo?

My theory was laid to rest as Sooyoung nervously answered his cell phone. Who was it? Why was he answering the phone like he was walking into a haunted house? I silenced the car radio, so I could listen in on at least one end of the phone call.

“Hey noona… Um... The whole story? Well, I was having breakfast with Hara and I finally broke up with her.”

I could hear yells and screams coming from whoever he was on the phone with. After the harsh screams settles to softer yells. Makeup man, Choi Sooyoung, continued his story.

“So we pulled in at this barbecue restaurant and I just went straight out and called her a crazy, plastic and that I wanna break up with her. Next? She kicked me out of her car. I had to avoid the paparazzi so, I ran across the street to a grocery store… Yeah, they were heading up the street in their white vans! … Oh now?... I am in the car with my uh… friend… Joe. Yeah Joe picked me up… Okay, I know the pollen count is high!... yeah, I swear. I’ll take the medicine!... Yeah okay I’ll see you tomorrow.”

So the reason he came rushing into Soshi Grocery begging for makeup was because he broke up with his girlfriend. For a regular human, you would be sent to the nearest insane hospital. But, when you are being stalked by paparazzi, it makes sense in a strange twisted way.

Noticing that I was just driving on a highway now, I thought it would be a great time to ask Sooyoung where I was to drop him off.

“Well, before I answer your question. Would you mind telling me your name?”

“Jung Jessica.” I spat out. “Okay, where am I dropping you off?”

“Jung Jessica.” Sooyoung said, repeating my name as if taking it for a test drive. “Jessica, you see, my publicist just told me that news has already broken about my breakup with Hara. She informed me that well... several paparazzi are outside my hotel, waiting for me at the entrance.”

What am I to do now? Babysit him until he is safe and everyone leaves?

“Jessica you have two options, well actually three. One, we drive around and have a little fun. Two, you drop me off at one of my friend’s house. Three, you sadly drop me off in from of the pack of wolves lingering by my hotel. You know what? Option number two is out of question. Pick one, Jung Jessica.”

“Okay, so where is your hotel?” I chirped, looking at the horrified look on Sooyoung’s (nice-looking) face.

“You’re really going to drop me off in front of those lunatics? I gave you two options because I thought you would pick the first one!”

“I was only kidding, chill! I’m sure that it would be pretty entertaining to spend an hour or two with you.”

“Yeah, it’s a mad house when those bugger paparazzi come near my hotel and those habadab ankle-biters are always begging me for autographs!”

Am I the only one who doesn’t comprehend gibberish? What is an ankle-biter? Why are they habadabing by his hotel? What the hell are bugger paparazzi? I look at Sooyoung like he was from Mars. He returned with an innocent face and asked me why I was looking at him so funny. I repeated my exact thoughts to him.

“Oh, you know, sometimes things like that just slip out.”

“So you just say random words at random times?” Wow, I sure did have a weirdo in the passenger seat!

“Oh no, you are misunderstanding it all! It’s my type of slang. You know? Ankle-biters are kids, generally my fans. Don’t get me wrong, they are part of my success; sometimes their repetitive requests for me to sign their body parts get annoying especially when signing those parts would get me a one way ticket to jail. On with the slang, habadab and bugger are both forms of being annoying.”

“Oh alright.” I stated, as if I had actually just comprehended what he had just said “So, where exactly am I driving?”

“Well all public malls and restaurants are totally out of question. We could go to-“ Sooyoung’s eyes were caught on his watch. “Actually, look at the time! Hang on, let me call my publicist to see if the paparazzi are outside my hotel still.”

He pulled out his phone and for the second time called his publicist.