Peanut Butter? check.

Now where are those cold noodles mom likes?

I scanned the shelf thoroughly while noticing the complete absence of shoppers at Soshi Grocery today. Where were everyone and their shopping carts?

“Yes! Cold Noodles!”

I slowly reached out my tip-toes to the top shelf when a sudden pull latched onto my scarf gagging my neck.

I was so aghast that I couldn’t even yell for help. A guy about my age started stealing my sunglasses and scarf. His face looked like it was already well-covered in fear.

“Quick, I need your makeup or girly lipstick stuff, NOW! Get it out! You need to put some on me; I need to have a disguise from them!” He yelled.

Wide-eyed and obeying his command, I rolled off my tote and began to quickly rummage through it- looking for that ugly lipstick my mom had bought me for my birthday last year. I pulled it out and marveled at its ugly magenta color, why was it even in my purse still? Screw the lipstick, what the hell was going on with makeup boy on aisle seven over here?

“Hurry, they know where I am and they’re coming soon!”

“Okay!” I stuttered out- trying to regain my speech. “Are the freaking aliens coming? What the fu-“

“Hush it! Pipe down! Just apply this makeup and everything will be fine.”

  The overall mood changed from frightening to ridiculous and unbelievable in a split second. I now marveled at the fact that I was frantically applying (now my own, personal mascara) to a boy of my age.

But who was he talking about, who was coming?

The aisle reeked of cold noodles; I accidentally dropped them whenever makeup man startled me.

“You need to drive me out of this place, fast! I have a couple hundred- is that a deal?”

I snagged the money without question and shoved it into my now unorganized purse. The money bribe really sealed the deal regardless of if he was a dangerous stranger or not.

The boy continuously took glances out of the store and into the parking lot.

“Here’s the plan, we’re going to walk out of this grocery store calmly. Starting now, we are calm, relaxed people. Nothing has happened; think calm and nothing else. Laugh, talk and act like we are best friends. If the paparazzi are already outside and ask you about the whereabouts of anyone, say you just saw a suspicious guy leave, please, for me. I swear I’m not dangerous nor will I do anything to you. You will just have to explain if anyone asks.”

Although this boy was wearing makeup and dressed like a girl, you could tell by his sincere voice that he was serious about every word no matter how bogus it came out.

“Where’s your car?” He asked, while adjusting my scarf to fit his neck.

I innocently pointed over to my dad’s BMW ActiveE.

“Remember what to say. I already see the photographers out there.” He commented before biting his lip and mumbling, “… how did they find these things so fast?”

His deep voice didn’t exactly match the quick coat of lipstick, eye shadow, and mascara I sloppily applied (the lipstick was the only thing that was applied neatly- I was taking my time to savor the moment). Even though we just met on the instant food aisle in the store, I knew he no longer meant harm to me. Right before we left the store exit, he put on my ‘stolen’ sunglasses and put his hood over his head.