“Is she…dead?” I whispered trying not to get hysterical.

                “Yes, the finally died.” My father said awestruck.

                That’s when a nerve hit, “You killed her!” I screamed.

                “No, you killed her!” my father screamed back and gave me another slap on my face.

                “You beat her! She was only protecting me.” I cried.

                “Yes, bravo Joo-Hyun! Bravo. Another family member died in your hands.” He clapped and smiled evilly. “Now go to your room and don’t tell anyone about this or else you’re next.” He turned to my mother. “Now what to do with you?”

                I walked out to my room, not taking his words lightly. My mother, my savior, my lighthouse. She’s gone. I went to my bathroom and took out my hidden box behind all the other medicines and boxes. Opened, it had scissors, razors, and knives inside it. I took out the razor that I haven’t really used in a long time and cut down my arm. Over and over again, making it deeper, I didn’t stop until I saw the crimson blood running down my arm and making a puddle into the sink before running to the drain. I washed all the blood away and changed into flannel sleeping pants and a black sweater. I cried until I suffocated in sleep’s loving arms.

                It was around 3 am when I heard my dad’s padded footsteps come up the stairs and check my room. I guess he was seeing if I was still there? I don’t really know. But he went out mumbling something about what a good I was. I didn’t care. I was too tired, and I went down under sleep’s embrace again.

                “Taeyeon! Please don’t leave me!” I shouted in the darkness of my dream.

                “I’m sorry Seohyun, but I have to go.” She called me my nickname and I felt her fading lips on my forehead.

                “Mom please don’t go.” I begged to her on my knees.

                “Seohyun-ah, I have to. Stay strong for me okay?” She moved my bangs out of my eyes like she always used to do with her touch lingering, she too disappeared into the darkness.

                I woke up shrieking covered in cold sweat on my face and puddling on my jacket and shirt. I turned to the side and looked at my ipod dock clock. 6:30 am it read. I sighed and got up to my bathrrom and took a shower looking at my freshly cut arm. I let a few tears escape in the shower and walked out to change into my usual all black. My school didn’t have a dress code or a uniform like other schools did so I wore black skinny jeans, black long sleeved shirts, and a black sweater with black converse mostly. I collected my homework from the desk and shoved it into my backpack. I peeked out my door to see if ‘he’ was home and I sighed in relief when he wasn’t there. “I have a beat free morning.” I tried to smile and walked out the door to my school with my ipod blasting Trax songs.

                When I walked into the school, I felt everyone’s eyes on me and I heard their whispers and murmurs about me and I ducked my head lower and went to my homeroom while stringing my ipod down my jacket. I walked to the back corner of the room which was my usual seat and ducked my head studying for the English test in 3^rd period. Soon the others started pouring in and a new boy came in. He gave off the new kid aura and all the girls snapped their heads to him. I guess he was goodlooking. He had jet black hair, skin that looked like it was lightly kissed by the sun, nice lips, and a straight nose. He was probably the same height that I am. His eyes were a warm dark brown. He smiled to the class showing his pearly white, but cutely crooked teeth as he played with the buttons of his blue and white horizontally striped cardigan. I looked back down trying to concentrate on the English song playing and the English notes.

                “You can sit next to Ms. Seo.” I thought I heard my teacher say. I didn’t look up though.

                “MS.SEO!” She yelled and my head snapped up to meet the eyes of my snickering classmates and the new kid. “Sit next to her.”

                He moved towards me as I watched him get closer with a small kind smile on his face. I probably looked like I was glaring at him because his smile slowly went away. I went back to studying.

                But it was before Im Yoona turned around and said, “Hi, I’m Yoona,, you’re free to sit with me and my friends at lunch if you want.”

                Typical Im Yoona to make a move on the new kid. Gosh I can’t believe that we were even best friends.

                “Alright.” The new kid smiled at her thinking that she was a friendly person. Well, she is, just depends on what definition.

                He turned to me and held out a hand, “I’m Jung Yonghwa.” He flashed me a smile showing his white, cutely crooked teeth. I swear if he got braces just to straighten his teeth out, I would punch him in the face to make it like this again.

                I just stared at his hand and back to him and then went back to my book and notes. Completely ignoring him and everyone around me. 

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wow i know that this chapter was long overdue. sorry! i was busy with things...like tumblr c:

anyways, whose going/went (if you read this after today) to the SM Town concert in LA?

I am/did.~