March 2008

“I’m going to change first”. This is the third time I’m changing my t-shirt. There are lots of things I have to do after going to variety school. I need to practice my dance and following Hyoyeon is really double the hard work. “Unni you look so red and about to cry” Hyoyeon said smiling. “I’m not crying, you know it’s hard to catch up to you. Why did the President asked you to help me? That’s mean I need to be in the same level as the ‘dance queen’ and it’s impossible”. I mumble in the changing room. I have 30 minutes to learn the dance steps then I need to train my voice. I admit it’s really hard being a member without face and nice curves because I need to sound and dance amazingly. Not to mention, I’m one of the ‘short legs’ group with Hyoyeon and Taeyeon. “Unni, don’t make that face, you’ll look older than me.” Hyoyeon passes a bottle of mineral to me. “Ya! I AM older than you. So, respect me.” I throw the towel to her face and laugh with her as we continue to dance. “Soyeon unni, president is looking for you”. Seohyun calls me from the door. Her voice sounds so tired because of the vocal training. “Ok..my second boyfriend is calling me”. I wave goodbye to Hyoyeon and Seohyun.

I knock the door and as I enter the room I see Eunhyuk oppa and president discussing something. Oppa smiles at me and president asks him “Did you tell her already?” and oppa just shake his head. “Soyeon-ah, the producer and the management of the variety school really loves you, so they’ll be nominating you for a variety programme involving school. This is a really good opportunity for advertising the group with you isn’t it? You’re really a leader with great ability.” This is the first time, president complimenting me. No, complimenting a human being. And I just smile proudly. “You should be busy organizing the school’s programme as training from now and they asked me to reduce your activities. Since I can’t reduce your training, so I’ll be excluding you from your senior’s opening performance or special stage in their concert.” The president explains and I look at oppa while oppa just looks at his shoes. Maybe that’s a pair of new shoe that he can’t get his eyes off them. I know what the president’s meant by ‘excluding you from your senior’s opening performance or special stage in their concert’. “Jessica will be replacing you in the performance with Eunhyuk. I hope you can help her with the singing and emotion. She’s getting better.” The president smiles. Wow, this is a complimenting day for our president. I don’t know why he’s so happy. “Yes, president. Thank you”. I go out with oppa and he holds my hand tightly. “Good luck Soyeon-ah and congratulations. I know you can be the best in what you’re doing.” He smiles and I look at his glittering eyes that I don’t know how long I had been missing them. “Why oppa didn’t tell me about the performance?” I ask. “I forget. There lots of thing I need to do and I never once trained with Jessica yet” He explains while walking. I wave at him and enter the music studio where we all practice to sing.

I see Jessica and she’s reading the song that she’ll perform with Eunhyuk oppa. “Unni, long time no see.” From her looks I know she’s shock seeing me. She’s been avoiding me since last week and right now she can’t even look at me properly. I know she felt guilty about doing the performance. “Did you avoiding me because of Eunhyuk oppa?” I ask. “What? Nnnooo...” She has this question mark looks on her face. “It’s okay for me.I’m fine with it.” I said. “You’re fine with it?” She asks again with that looks. “You can perform with him and you’ll be great because you can sing better than me in this song. You also can dance better compare to me with oppa. So, don’t worry Sica-ya”. I smile and she smiles to with a long exhale. “Aaaa..then, unni can teach me how to breath correctly while singing.” I just nod and pat her head lightly. “I miss you, Sica-ya”

“We will do this in a group of four. You better choose a great member if you want the extra credit. Yoseob, you better find amazing friends as your group member because you fail last month in the test. And Kikwang, do something for your extra credit because you have lots to catch up” Mr. Yoo explains on our ‘First Stage’ end of this month. He’s reading our name for the grouping. This school never gives us chance to pick our own partner because we need to do an ‘un-predict-able performance’. It is so impossible. Definitely if I’m in the same group with over Yoseob, stupid Joon and that new student Kikwang. It’s going to be a nightmare. I shut my eyes and pray for the best team mates. “Last group; Lee Joon, Lee Kikwang, Park Soyeon and Yang Yoseob”.I hear Mr. Yoo voice loud and clear. Yes, that’s it. That’s my name, Park Soyeon and I’m going to make a great performance with my members. I smile and open my eyes where all Jiyeon, Hwayoung, Minkyung, Hyomin, Hyosung and Min’s eyes were on me. And they don’t look good. Omo! Whose’s in my team again? Lee Joon? Lee Kikwang? Yang Yoseob? OMG!!!I look at Kikwang that sitting beside me with his ears plug in and book in his hand, smirking while reading his book. This is so not happening. Somebody should help me.

I look around in this room. Quiet. Hyomin, Hwayoung and Minkyung should already start rapping with Ji-yong, Simon Oppa and Minho. Min, Hyosung and Jiyeon should be dancing and popping with Chansung, Onew and Myung Hoon Oppa. And us, staring at each other, actually at the ceiling and floor. Kikwang then stands up and heading to the door. “Ya, where are you going? We not yet discuss anything.” I said and looking at Joon when he said “Do you want me to hit him?” I just hit my head with my palm and Yoseob continue “Just find something to do, like singing or dancing” He said. Kikwang that stop at the door then said “Just singing and dancing won’t give us any good extra credits. I hear that both of you can dance and act very well. Let’s just do mute musical; dancing and acting. We are late for sports training.” Then he just left. I look at Yoseob and Joon then nod my head while standing. “So, let’s do a musical without voice. I’ll be your manager and music arranger.” I smile. Then Yoseob and Joon said simultaneously “You just don’t want to do anything”. And I keep smiling widely.