It was the regular routine, and no matter how long Jaejoong waited out the time in the car, he was never prepared for the onslaught of harassment. It was his manager who made him get out of the car. A twenty yard walk, that's all he had to travel and he'd be away from the touching. And then another forty yards and he'd be away from all the screaming. After that, all he had to do was board the plane and he'd be on his way with Yoochun and Junsu to Peru. 

The thick shades on his nose provided a shield between his fans and him, but Jaejoong waved his hand a few times, causing an uproar each time. Other hands were already feeling his back up, touching any part of him they could. Usually the fans never touched above the shoulders or below the pelvis bone, but today someone broke that law. 

Slender fingers gently brushed against the back of Jaejoong's head while a bold hand squeezed his . That broke the last of Jaejoong's restraints. He turned around and yelled, "Yah!! What do you think you're doing?! You can't go ing touching me, !! Do you realize it's because of people like you that we're all so tired? Crazy ... You ever wonder why we're tired?" Jaejoong took off his shades and rubbed off the makeup under his eyes. "Look, it's all black and sad. You did that! Every night you es are in my ing dream and--yah!! Where do you think you're going?!"

The girls had started to back away, but Jaejoong waved a hand at them to tell them to come back over, which they complied. "You know we get ing slapped?" Jaejoong growled, hitting the girl in the shoulder. "It's harder than that." He slapped the other girl, harder. She started crying. "No, don't ing cry because that's not even the most of what you all ing do to us! Crazy es... We get giant bruises that even makeup can't cover. What the do you say to that?!?!"

Yoochun suddenly gripped Jaejoong's arm. "We need to leave," he murmured. 

Jaejoong obeyed, slipping his shades back onto his face. What had he done? He'd slapped and cursed at a fan... He didn't even know what she looked like and yet he'd yelled at her, accused her of all the happenings of all the other sasaeng fans. 

As the three sat patiently on the plane Jaejoong suddenly got a text message. Without thinking, he opened it and instantly wished he hadn't.

"Oppa! Have a nice trip. I'll be waiting for you when you come back from Peru. Fighting!"

To a normal person, this would be an encouraging message, but Jaejoong interpreted it different. To him, the fan was saying, "Be safe and successful so you can come back and I can molest and harass you some more." He didn't like that this girl had his phone number, but already he'd changed his number twice and she still found him, so he gave up. 

"Please turn off all cellphones and other electronic devices at this moment," the lady over the PA system chirped. 

Jaejoong couldn't comply fast enough, his hands shaking as he tore the battery pack out of his phone and threw the pieces into his bag. The singer shook as he glared out the thick window, dark swirling clouds hovering outside the window. He felt Yoochun put a hand on his shoulder. 

"We'll be alright, Joongie," he said softly. 

Jaejoong didn't say anything; he just put his glasses in his bag and put his head on Yoochun's shoulder. 

"Yoochun... If I close my eyes, will the fans be there?" he asked softly. 

Yoochun kissed Jaejoong's head, but he didn't say anything. The baritone held his friend tight, their hands intertwined. No words were spoken between them because they knew the answer. Yes... The sasaeng fans had invaded every centimeter of Jaejoong mind and body. It would be inevitable for him to not dream of the beasts. 

Junsu suddenly tugged at Yoochun's sleeve and asked, "Will we get to play soccer in Peru?"

Leave it to Junsu to brighten the mood with his love for soccer. Jaejoong smiled gently, and Junsu smiled, too, happy that he'd managed to pull a rare, genuine grin from his hyung. The youngest sat back, hooking his arm through Yoochun's and laying his head on his shoulder. At times like these, Yoochun felt like a father to his friends, and he was as protective as ever during these times. It led him to think of Yunho and Changmin. 

To take care of both Jaejoong's and Junsu's emotional instability was a challenge for one man. When they were five, it took a part of all four of their strengths to control Jaejoong, but over time he became tamable. During that time, he stuck to Yunho and Changmin. Junsu was solely in Yoochun's care. Many times Jaejoong would come running to Yoochun because either Yunho wasn't around at the time or Yunho didn't understand his needs. Yoochun was able to read each member and know what was wrong; unfortunately, it wasn't the same for every member and him. 

Yoochun, as empathetic as he was, was able to give much emotion for a friend, yet, for himself, it took effort unless it was a giant matter. As he pondered Jaejoong feelings, he realized that the man actually gave more of himself than anyone. He did it naturally. The only reason why Junsu had been taking Jaejoong's suffering of the sasaeng fans onto himself was because they were trying to protect what little emotion and sanity Jaejoong had left before the sasaeng fans actually managed to purge him of his will to live, and even now, he was slowly dying from the inside out. 

"Yoochun, will there be sasaeng fans in Peru?" Junsu asked. 

Yoochun only pat Junsu's head, placing a kiss on top of his hair. "I... I don't know..." he said softly. 

Junsu nodded, nuzzling more into Yoochun's shoulder. "I hope we really do get to play soccer there," he said sleepily before dozing into a light sleep.

Yoochun chuckled. It really is like Junsu to brighten the mood with soccer. And then the plane lurched and took off for Peru. 


The three singer collapsed, exhausted from completing their successful oversea concert. Showering quickly, the three decided to rest their aching bodies, but no more than ten minutes later was Junsu begging Yoochun to go play soccer with him. The two left after a begrudgingly sour Yoochun agreed forcefully. Jaejoong was left in the vast hotel room by himself.

Ever since the band landed in Peru, not a person had touched them inappropriately, though, someone in the crowd of fans had been holding a sign that said, "Junsu, can I please touch your ?" The man nearly died of laughter, but at the same time coward in fear of the memories. 

Jaejoong stepped out onto the balcony, breathing in the fresh air. The blissful sound of silence filled the air; there were no fans outside his room pestering him. Peru was peaceful. Jaejoong was lighting a cigarette when the phone in his pocket began buzzing continuously. 

Stowing away his lighter, Jaejoong picked up his phone without looking. "Hello?"

"Jaejoong-ah..."

Jaejoong froze. So soft was the voice, proud and confident, masculine, definitely not the sasaeng fan he had subconsciously anticipated. "Y-Yunho..."

"I hear you're in Peru. Congratulations."

Furrowing his eyebrows, Jaejoong could hear the resistance in his voice. He was hiding something. "Yeah... Yunho-ah... What's wrong?"

"Nothing... I just... I'm wasting a lot of minutes, aren't I?"

"No, you're fine. What's wrong?" Jaejoong was worried.

Yunho sniffled. "Nothing... I miss you and the other two..."

A faint smile spread across Jaejoong's lips. "We miss you, too, Yunnie-ah... And Changmin."

"Why did you leave us, Joongie?"

"It was never our intention to leave you and Changmin--just to leave SM."

Jaejoong took a drag of his cigarette and Yunho snorted. 

"Are you smoking Kim Jaejoong?" he scolded. "I can smell it now. You better not be smoking!"

Jaejoong laughed. "I need to. It's a nerve calmer, I guess."

"Joongie, we've been through tons of together. Smoking's not your only escape."

Jaejoong shook his head even though Yunho couldn't see. "It's nothing. You don't need to worry about me, Yunnie-ah..." He was determined not to tell Yunho about the sasaeng fans.

"Jaejoong..."

"I'm fine, Yunho." He would not worry his friend with the sasaeng fans.

"Joongie-ah..."

"It's alright, Yun--"

"Kim Jaejoong... Talk to me..."

It was those last three words that broke his frail will to withstand his friend's interrogation. 

"Sasaeng fans..." Jaejoong breathed.

Yunho gasped. "They've gotten to you, haven't they?" he asked.

Jaejoong nodded. "They've been following every day. Today was the first day that they weren't. Yunho, I'm scared. There's one that stole our things and destroyed them and knows my phone number. I can't get rid of her!"

Yunho exhaled hotly. "Oh, I wish I could hold you," he answered softly. "I wish I could protect you from all the world's harshness and insanity."

Jaejoong bit his lip. "How are you and Changmin?"

"Our schedules have been packed, so the baby's sleeping." He laughed. "I shouldn't call him a baby, should I? He's more muscle than me now!" 

Jaejoong smiled as he rubbed out his cigarette. "Minnie always worked out very hard. I miss him... How is he?"

"Missing his hyung. One time we were sitting on the couch with each other and he suddenly punched me. I yelled at him one time for it, but I realized that he missed getting into fights with you, so I don't do anything about it anymore."

Jaejoong scoffed. "I miss messing with him too."

"There was another time where I was just laying in bed awake late at night and all of a sudden, he lays next to me and tells me to play with his hair. He said that when he was very sleepy, you'd do this for him to help him get to sleep. He fell asleep within five minutes."

Jaejoong stifled a cry. "He seems to miss me a lot..."

"Don't cry, Joongie-ah. We want the world to see your beautiful face, not your bitter tears."

The older chuckled. "I'm not crying... When Min wakes up, tell him I miss him, and that I love him."

"Of course. I have to go now, but listen, whatever the sasaeng fans are doing, stay strong, Boo. We can't lose you first, okay? I promise that we'll all be five again one day and the sasaeng fans will stop doing all of this."

The singer tilted his head down and scoffed again. "In order for that to happen, we'd all have to be dead."

Yunho clicked his tongue. "So negative, Joongie. Think happier, Boo! I love you! Return to Seoul happy, okay?"

Jaejoong nodded. "Of course, Yunnie... I love you too..." And then he hung up. 

Jaejoong's cheeks flushed red, his heart hammering at the memories the five used to have together. He could still imagine it now. Yoochun would be reading an English book while Junsu and Changmin were playing video games and rough housing. Yunho would either be talking to the manager about tomorrow's activities, catching up on sleep, or reading. And Jaejoong? He would be doing what he was doing now--sitting on the balcony, gazing at the stars, and dreaming of a life that he'd want instead of this one. 

The singer dragged his feet back into the hotel room, closing the sliding glass door behind him. Flopping onto his bed, he d around for a pillow, hugging the stuffed case against his chest. He imagined that the pillow was Yunho, hugging him tightly, protecting him from the world's evils, from the sasaeng fans. 

Tonight, Jaejoong cried, but it wasn't anger or sorrow. He didn't know why he cried. All he knew is that he needed to. There were so many emotions bottle up in his heart that he felt it was swelling to the point of bursting, so he cried. But later on, after a few days, he found out why he had cried. He had unconsciously realized that even Yunho couldn't protect him from everything in the world. 

Sasaeng fans were one of those things...


For once, JYJ didn't fear the airport. Their stay in wonderfully peaceful Peru had ended and now the three were headed to the United States for a vacation. 

"Let stop by the beach!" Yoochun suggested. "It'd be great to relax on the sand."

"Will there be soccer?" Junsu asked.

Jaejoong rolled his eyes. "It's a beach, Junsu-ah. They don't play soccer usually."

"Then what is there to do?"

"You can play volleyball," Yoochun answered.

"No! It reminds me of the Saipan Vacation! As much as that was fun, I refuse to use a ping pong paddle and a spoon for sports ever again!"

Jaejoong and Yoochun laughed. "Then you can jump in the ocean and pretend you're a dolphin," they said.

Junsu scooted forward in his seat. "So volleyball! That sounds fun!"

The other two laughed again. As the three glared down at the sea of red balloons, red T-shirts, and anything red, they smiled, happy that their influence had spread to the other side of the world. 

Their joy was short-lived as Yoochun's phone rang. He picked up instantly. 

"Yoohwan-ah! Is anything wrong?" he said immediately.

"Hyung, are you still in Peru?"

Yoochun furrowed his eyebrows, glancing at Jaejoong and Junsu's confused faces before answering, "Yes. Why? Has something happened? Did the sasaeng fans get to you?"

"What? Sasaeng--no! But... You need to come home as soon as possible. Dad... Dad passed away..."

Yoochun's mouth gaped open. After a couple of seconds, he finally regained feeling in his jaw. As tears prickled to his eyes, Yoochun answered, "I'll... I'll come home as soon as possible... T-Try to hold off the... ceremony until I get back?"

"Of course, hyung. Have a safe flight..." They hung up. 

"Chunnie? Yoochun-ah..." Junsu said softly.

"Sit down," Jaejoong instructed. 

Yoochun wiped the salty tears from his cheeks. Shaking his head, he took Junsu's and Jaejoong's hands into his. 

"What happened?" Jaejoong asked.

"My... My father... Is dead..." he muttered, gasping hard sobs between his words. 

A deep pang of empathy flowed from Jaejoong and Junsu's hearts. Yoochun's father had been a father to Jaejoong and Junsu too. He had been emotional and empathetic just like Yoochun. The baritone had loved his father very much, and now with him gone, the only family he had left in Korea was his little brother. 

It took Yoochun two hours to stop crying, which in that time their manager had managed to get them tickets to Seoul in a few hours. Even though Yoochun and Junsu had ceased their waterworks, hours after the news was broken, even while sitting on the plane, Jaejoong continuously shed tears of sorrow and sympathy. It wasn't Jaejoong's father who had died, and yet he cried more tears than Mr. Park's actual son.

"Hyung, stop crying," Yoochun cooed softly. "It'll be alright."

Jaejoong shook his head. No... It wouldn't be alright... It just wouldn't. Jaejoong didn't know why he was crying so much, but he was. 

"Yoochun... I'm so sorry..." Jaejoong gasped, laying his head on Yoochun's shoulder.

He nodded. "I know... It's okay..." Tears sprung to his eyes again, and then the plane took off.

When the trio arrived in Seoul, thoughts of the sasaeng fans disappeared. Disheveled and grieved, the three ambled through the airport, heavy, bitter tears of sorrow sliding down their cheeks. They were surprised to find that there were no camera flashes. Wouldn't the media want pictures of the boys of JYJ crying over a member's dead father?

Jaejoong looked up slightly and was suddenly overwhelmed by joy and proud. What he saw was a sea of Cassiopeia blocking the cameras from taking pictures. Picture of the idols without makeup and crying in sympathy and sorrow wasn't something the fans were going to allow the media to plaster everywhere. He lowered his head again and the three continued walking. 

As his phone rang a text, Jaejoong smiled for the first time since the sasaeng fans invaded his life.

"Welcome home, Jaejoong oppa! Please don't cry anymore. It's hard to block the pictures. Return home safely!"

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A/N: Hey!! I decided to update!! I'm REALLY SORRY that I haven't updated in so long~ School's been a handful~ >< But I'm leaving in about a week for vacation in Vietnam and I'm REALLY excited!! ^^ <3 Hope you guys enjoyed they update~ <3