Yoochun didn't want to wake up. Who would want to after being physically abused, verbally harassed through text messages, and stalked all day and night? The past few days had been hell to Yoochun, not like the past nine years wasn't too. Jaejoong was as moody as ever, fine one moment and shaking like a soaked kitten the next. It scared Yoochun. The older was definitely sleep deprived, dark bags under his eyes as obvious evidence of his lack of sleep, as well as his snappy attitude and dark remarks. It made Yoochun uncomfortable. To see his once strong hyung whose eyes sparkled brightly with inspiration and determination now smolder into an empty carcass of what his dreams once meant. 

Junsu was in no better condition either. His cute, small eyes had unseen bags beneath, covered up by heavy makeup. He shivered constantly, only comfortable when Yoochun or Jaejoong was around him. The baritone's heart broke seeing Junsu like this, always hiding himself, shying away from everyone. It was unnatural for the man Yoochun had grown up with and worked with, loving the bubbly and bright atmosphere Junsu could create in seconds, now missing when they needed it most in their dark lives. Afraid, Yoochun was, but not of the sasaeng fans like Jaejoong and Junsu were. No, he was afraid of the fans' effects on his band members. Would this happen to him too? Has it already happened? Are Junsu and Jaejoong really taking more abuse from those crazy girls than he was? 

Yoochun sighed, eyes still closed. Be more attentive, he promised to himself. He'd take all the pain away from his friends. He'd see the day when Junsu would smile genuinely and Jaejoong could laugh again. 

"Chunnie..." a soft voice cried in front of him.

Yoochun eyes flew open, instantly alert to tend to the crying man who'd come for his comfort. Sitting up, Yoochun asked, "What is it, Junsu-ah?"

Junsu dove into Yoochun's wide bed, snuggling his face into Yoochun's neck. "I'm so scared..." he whispered, fear slipping off his tongue in the form of words. 

Yoochun wrapped his arms around Junsu. Muscled, broad shouldered, Junsu was a perfect icon of healthy and fit, but Yoochun knew better. Beneath his cute, soft night clothes there was a small waist and distended belly. Junsu hadn't been eating correctly, fear of food poisoning and anxiety attacks rendering him unable to consume food in large quantities. And beneath the taut skin, Yoochun knew there lay a pure, withering heart. Junsu's heart beat so strong, loud and proud, but because of the fans, they broke off his heart, piece by piece. He wholehearted gave everything to the sasaeng fans, and they repaid him in fear, in actions that drive him further into insanity every day. Yoochun's heart pounded against his rib cage, tears threatening to mingle with Junsu's. Nothing in their world was right anymore. 

"What time is it?" Junsu rasped after a full ten minutes of crying.

Yoochun blearily wiped the few tears and sleep from his eyes, sitting up slightly to view his clock. "Five in the morning," murmured into Junsu's hair, rubbing a hand up and down his back.

There was a moment of silence before Jaejoong burst into the room. "Yoochun-ah!!" he squealed, jumping onto the bed on the other side of the baritone. 

Thin, malnourished arms wrapped around Yoochun's forearms as bony fingers tangled into his shirt and a flat chest pressed against his back. Jaejoong's soft breathing, rapid, frightened Yoochun.

"What happened, hyung?" he asked.

"Sasaeng fans... Everywhere..." he murmured into the back of Yoochun's shirt.

"None of them are here," Junsu said, sitting up. 

"They don't have to be," Jaejoong growled, also sitting.

Yoochun pulled himself out from under the covers. "What are you talking about, Joongie?"

Jaejoong shook his head, too mortified to speak.

Worried, Yoochun took Jaejoong's hand into his. "Don't hold it in," he reminded him. "What's wrong?"

Struggling with his words, Jaejoong clenched his jaw, debating whether to answer or not, how to answer. 

"They don't have to be here physically," he murmured finally, his large, dark eyes wide, fear plain as day evident. "They're here." He tapped his temple.

Mind and thoughts, dreams, Yoochun realized. That's where the sasaeng fans find Jaejoong. That's not good. Jaejoong's dreams were the last untouched area of his life that fans had not mangled. But now, knowing he dreams of the sasaeng fans violating him, Yoochun was unnerved. Was Jaejoong breaking before Junsu and him?

No... That couldn't be. He was so much stronger than Junsu and him. Jaejoong couldn't be the first to break out of the three. Yoochun bit his lip as he tried to reassure himself that Jaejoong could last. If he could last at least a few more years, Junsu and he could make it through all this insanity. 

Suddenly, Junsu frowned, eyebrows creased in deep thought. Yoochun and Jaejoong watched him jog out of the room toward his bedroom. A short, shrill squeal echoed through the dorm as the dancer reappeared in the doorframe with a frightened expression.

"It's gone," he said softly. "My dolphin plushy that Junho got me from Japan... It's gone!"

Yoochun instantly got out of bed and pushed Jaejoong and Junsu out of his room. "Search your bedrooms and see if anything else is missing," he instructed.

Jaejoong had once been asked if Yoochun was a neat person. His response had been, "He's neat. He's filthy neat." Glancing around his room, his friend had been nothing short of the truth. He could easily locate all of his things that were missing, but it would take some time to think as to what item was missing. Twenty minutes later, Yoochun wrote down what things of his were missing, a list of four items. He walked out to the hallway where his giant bookcase of CDs stood tall and proud. Judging from the small gaps in each row, Yoochun deducted that at least ten CDs had been stolen.

The JYJ members met out in the living area as they recounted what items had been taken. From Junsu's room, his dolphin plushy, a pair of headphones, a pair of sneakers, and a shirt were missing, which was found in Jaejoong's room. From Jaejoong's room the missing items were a pair of earrings, his underwear, and a bracelet. And at least ten CDs, two rings, a bracelet, and a pair of headphones had been taken from Yoochun. 

"This isn't good," Jaejoong muttered, chin resting on the coffee table.  

Yoochun sighed, squeezing Junsu's trembling hand underneath the table. 

"They're taking everything from us," he wailed softly. "It's not fair!" 

"They can't appreciate what we've already given them," Yoochun added.

"... Because of them we're like this..." Jaejoong growled. "We dedicate our whole lives into making music and putting on performances for these people and they ing steal from us?! What more do they want? We've given them everything but our houses. What else can we do to satisfy these beasts?"

"Nothing," Junsu muttered.

"We can only endure it, Joongie," Yoochun said. "Even if we quit the industry, they'll still follow us like the idols we are. They won't stop."

Jaejoong nodded and stood up. "I'm canceling our schedules for today," he announced.

"Hyung, you can't--" Junsu protested.

"I can, and I will!" Jaejoong yelled. 

"Junsu's right, you can't," said Yoochun, panicking slightly. Kim Jaejoong could get what Kim Jaejoong wanted almost always, and Yoochun needed to get out of the dorm. If Jaejoong put them on lockdown, no one would be able to enter or leave the dorm. "I need to finish filming," he lied.

"I have to go to rehearsal for the musical," Junsu added. "The show is soon."

Jaejoong exhaled hotly. "Whatever," he said, deflated. "Go do whatever. If you need me, I'll be sleeping. Or practicing. Whichever I can do first."

Yoochun flinched as Jaejoong stormed into his bedroom and slammed the door shut. Clapping his hand on Yoochun's shoulder, Junsu stood up. "I'm getting ready to leave," he said. 

"Are you really going to rehearsal?" Yoochun asked, also starting back to his room.

"Yes," Junsu said in a matter-of-fact tone.

Yoochun raised an eyebrow.

Junsu frowned uneasily. "I'm also going to go see Yunho hyung," he confessed. "But like you're going to go to filming!"

"You're right. I'm not," Yoochun admitted. "But I have to make sure Yoohwan is alright. Anything or anyone connected to us is also in danger of the sasaeng fans, in Korea or overseas. Remember that."

Junsu's posture stiffened. "I need to call Junho," he said suddenly, dashing off into his room. 


It wasn't a normal embrace. It was a hug filled with fear and love, all the normal feelings of brotherly love, save for the fear that shook them both and the length of their hug. Yoochun was reluctant to let go of Yoohwan. 

"It's good to see you, hyung," Yoohwan said happily.

Yoochun smiled because his brother was smiling. He hid the worry and pain that he felt in his heart. "How are you, Yoohwan?" he asked.

"It's... Okay..." he answered halfheartedly. Yoochun knew something was wrong now. 

"What happened?" he said hurriedly. "Is everything alright?"

"It's nothing," he insisted with a shy grin.

"Come on," Yoochun said, shaking his brother by the arm. 

"No," he whined. "You'll make fun of me!!"

"What is it???" Yoochun was persistent.

"It's just... I missed you, hyung," Yoohwan confessed. 

Yoochun couldn't help but laugh.

"See!!" Yoohwan screamed.

"No, I'm not making fun of you!" Yoochun exclaimed, hugging his brother. "I missed you a lot too."

Yoochun was glad, beyond joyful. As far as he knew, Yoohwan hadn't been even touched by the sasaeng fans, which was a good sign. Yoohwan didn't need the negativity or the creepiness of it all. 

Yoochun could sleep peacefully... For now.