28 | HOPELESS ROMANTIC

Baekhyun

There is no way in hell I am glad that this has happened. The last thing I ever wanted to witness was Choi Soobin having a panic attack because of things being too much around her. She was certainly overstimulated and that’s something I know how to handle, by a fair amount I’d say. I hate to see her like that and thinking that she probably doesn’t even understand why she’s feeling that way makes me feel worse.

But at the same time … God’s arrangements for tonight just seem to be working in my favour in some ways. While it’s true that I do not care if I worked all night serving my of a mother, I also don’t love the idea of being near her.

The way she looked at me earlier was something else. It’s like my mere presence would expose her. As if I have a sign on my forehead that says ‘Lee Mooyeon’s Secret Bastard’ or something like that.

It’s not my fault that she never cared to remember anything about me. I’ve told her where I worked. I told her about SCORCH Steakhouse & Bar and I told her when I started in The Alley Cat.

And of course, she knew about my escorting job too.

After my little talk with my girlfriend, I drag her back into the restaurant, but we go in from the back door this time. Thank god, Soobin always has her keys in her blazer pocket. “Wh—what am I supposed to tell Kyungsoo? He’s going to be disappointed in me. I don’t want to just leave every—” I lift a finger on my lips and shake my head slowly. “Babe, Kyungsoo’s not like that. If anything, I’m sure he’s worried about you.” I assure her.

She suddenly turns her head sharply and avoids my eyes for a split second until our eyes meet again, her cheeks burning with a warm colour as she blinks fast. “Do I ne—do I need to call you babe too?” I find out shortly why she acted flustered all of a sudden.

I only shrug my shoulders, giving her the full right to decide for herself. I didn’t call her babe just so she could call me the same.

I call her that because I want to. She’s a babe, what can I do?

“I mean, I don’t—I don’t mind you calling me that, I just feel—” I watch her wander her gaze everywhere but to me as we walk through the narrow corridor that leads to the laundry room and lockers. “I love the way you say my name too, so don’t worry too much,” I assure her, knowing very well that even explaining her reason would be too hard for her. “Baekhyun! like that. Baekhyun? Like that too. Ba—Baekhyun … that’s cute too. You always make this pouty face whenever you say the last syllable of my name, for some reason.” The way I imitate her way of saying my name finally makes her smile.

She looks down while tucking loose hair behind her ear. “Do I say it like that?” She asks.

I was about to say something when a figure blocks our way from getting into the office. It was Kyungsoo. As expected, he had that stern look on his face that still has a hint of concern. “What happened there?” He asks.

I try to pull Soobin to stand behind me but she doesn’t let me. “Chef, I’m okay. It just got a little too stuffy in there and I was nervous to see a lot of celebrities and—”

I swoop right in front of her and glared down at Kyungsoo meaningfully. He simply stares back with a raised eyebrow. “I realize I’m not a big fan of this protective boyfriend role you have been presenting me. It’s even more annoying than the average dickhead that you are. Get out of the way, she is speaking to me.” My boss comments with a sly tone.

When I don’t move, the tiny tard only walks around me and onto the other side of the wall, behind Soobin. I watch Soo in spin to face him as well. “Okay, continue what you were saying,” Kyungsoo tells her. “Tell me what’s wrong.”

I am fast enough to jump in between them again. “She’s gonna end up staying if you intimidate her like that.” I mouth at Kyungsoo although I very much doubt Soobin didn’t hear it because of our proximity.

“And you’re gonna end up under my meat cleaver if you don’t get out of my way immediately, Byun Baekhyun. Let me talk to my manager.” Kyungsoo glares back at me. “Like seriously, how am I intimidating right now? I’m doing nothing, I’m just asking a valid question.” He throws his arms up in the air.

“Your face is naturally intimidating,” I answer. “It’s like you’re born to intimidate people.” My smartass answer makes my boss purse his lips tightly on one side like he’s very close to kicking me in the nuts right now.

But that’s fine.

I know Choi Soobin very well. Even if she initially agreed to go home, she’d end up staying if this conversation goes on further and makes her feel guilty for feeling what she felt.

Kyungsoo sighs and peeks over my shoulders to look at my girlfriend. “It’s up to you, Soobin. If you feel too nervous to be a part of this big opportunity, you can go ahead and take the rest of the day off. I should be able to handle everything tonight until midnight. It should be doable.” He explains.

“Oh my god,” I groan. “That’s so passive-aggressive, Chef.”

“Oh my god, shut up.”

“No, you shut up.”

“No, you’re the one who keeps on—”

I don’t even realize that Soobin isn’t behind me anymore until we hear the door of the office shutting close. Oh , now I made her feel even worse. Great. Good job, Byun Baekhyun. An excellent way to cheer up your already anxious girlfriend is to argue with someone about her in front of her.

I have a lot to learn about being a boyfriend.

I’m trying my best but I feel like I’m already failing and it’s only been a day.

“I’m not in the right place to speak about her dilemma but whatever that is, she didn’t seem fine. I was right beside her, Baekhyun. I saw it. I felt it. She was shaking the whole time until she grew paler and paler. I’ve never seen her do that before. I just want to know what happened because I’m her boss.” Kyungsoo spoke making me look away from the office door to look at him again. “I understand that you two are dating now but please don’t try to interfere. This is still your workplace and everything that happens here has nothing to do with your personal relationship with her.”

“I’m sorry.” I look down and now I am genuinely feeling bad about arguing with him. “But all I know is that she’s not okay at the moment and I’d suggest she just goes home because it’s not gonna get any better. It’s not something she overcomes or grows numb from if she waits it out, Chef. That’s all I’m saying. And I just want to be there for her so I’m thinking maybe it’s best if I leave too, she needs comfort right now.”

Kyungsoo’s face softens up as he looks away. “Baekhyun,” He clears his throat before looking at me again. “If I’m letting her leave for personal reasons, that’s fine. But you can’t leave too just because she’s leaving. Soobin is an adult, she can take care of herself.”

I clench my fists on the sides of my shirt. “But Chef, she needs me to—”

“Is this your first-ever relationship?” Kyungsoo interrupts. His question makes me look away. Is it that obvious how clueless I am in the dating world? Am I that bad already? “Look, I don’t care whether she’s your first girlfriend or she’s your fifty-ninth girlfriend. All I’m saying is that I know about your nurturing personality that you have always poured out to your sick dad and brother. But Baekhyun—” He pauses for a moment before proceeding. “You can’t do the same to Soobin who is perfectly healthy and capable. You’ll suffocate her. I’m just saying this as your friend, not as your boss.”

Suddenly, I lost all the ability to speak. I don’t know how to argue with that. I didn’t even realize I was doing that just now.

It’s like … he hit something deep inside me that I never even knew was there in the first place. My dad and brother are completely dependent on me and that’s where I get all my confidence in life.

I know that I will always have them.

I know that they will always need me.

I know that I won’t lose them.

And now, it’s like an instinct for me to do the same to Soobin since becoming official with her last night. So that I won’t … lose her.  

Kyungsoo walks ahead but pats me on the shoulder. “I’ll talk to her and send her home. Get back to work, please.” He says softly before going into the office.

For another minute or two, I just stand there in silence. Am I doing this all wrong? I know t