“Yah! Lee Luda!! Let’s go out. It’s already the second week of summer but I still didn’t get to eat patbingsoo. Let’s go, Luda~” Dawon coaxed the girl with the game controller in her hands, eyes fixed on the TV game player.

“Yahhhh!!!!” The girl shouted angrily when Dawon stood in front of her, blocking her views on TV. “Move, Dawon,” she said in a threatening voice.

“No! If I have to, I will drag you out of here. You have been spending your summer with that game. Please spare some time for your best friend. Entertain me. And, be more productive please,” Dawon started to nag. “Go out, clear your mind, get some fresh air, meet people, please Luda,” her voice softened at her last sentence. She knows why exactly her best friend aka roommate behaves like this. She needed a distraction from that thing, but not like this. She just made herself become more depressed.

“Luda… you need to let her go. She doesn’t like it if you behave like this. Don’t you remember her last wish?” Dawon reminded her gently. She saw a pair of glistening eyes, she quickly pulled her friend into her hug – comforting her. “She wants you to be happy, remember?” Dawon felt a slight nod on her shoulder.

“Let’s go. Find your patbingsoo, but you must treat me one,” Luda said after a moment of silence.

“Aigooo” Dawon ruffled Luda’s bangs.

“Yah!! I’m older than you,” Luda prostested.

“By a few months?” Dawon laughed mockingly.

-

“I swear you, Nam Dawon, I will make you my slave for the rest of summer break. You paid then you left me to pick these alone huh. You better-” Luda’s nagging stopped when the tray she was holding hit someone’s elbow, made the patbingsoo spilt a bit on the tray and that person shouted in pain a little.

“Ohh s-sorry. I’m so sorry. I didn’t watch my steps properly. I’m so sorry,” Luda quickly apologized. She immediately put the tray on the empty table nearest her, and grabbed the tissues to wipe the person’s cloth – if there’s any stain left.

“It’s okay. My fault too”.

Luda looked up to see the owner of the voice in front of her. She saw a deep dark eye, staring at her. It was a girl, obviously taller than her. Her hair is long and blonde, with bangs hiding her forehead. She felt intimidated. Luda gulped. But somehow, Luda felt very close and familiar or whatever feelings she couldn’t describe right now.

“I apologize on behalf of my friend, miss”.

Luda was back to reality when she heard Dawon’s voice. She saw Dawon bow to the blonde girl.

“No, I’m fine. It’s okay. But I don’t think your friend is…” the blonde girl hesitated. She felt uncomfortable under Luda’s staring.

“Yah, Luda”.

Luda felt a nudge on her shoulder. “Huh?” she blinked a few times, then looked at her best friend.

“You are staring at her,” Dawon whispered in Luda's ear.

“O-oh, I’m sorry. I’m so sorry,” Luda shifted her attention to the tall blonde girl in front of her. ‘Hm, she was slightly shorter than Dawon,’ Luda thought. ‘Yah, why do I need to think about that? But she is beautiful. Her hair is blonde but she looks like a Korean. And she speaks Korean well too. Speaking of that, her voice is pretty too. Lee Luda! Come to your senses!’ She fought with her own thoughts.

“Okay okay, apologies accepted,” the blonde girl flashed a smile to Luda.

“Excuse me”. They heard a man's voice.

The blonde girl pulled Luda closer to her, letting the man walk passing them.

Luda felt her adrenaline rush through her body when she felt a touch on her arm. She looked at the hand that was still holding on her arm.

“Ops, sorry. My reflex,” the blonde girl let her arm go. “I need to go now, bye,” the blonde girl smiled again before she left.

Luda was stunned. She was still not moving, staring at the door where the blonde girl left. She felt somewhat very familiar with that blonde girl.

“Luda?”

She felt a tap on her shoulder. She looked at Dawon with her round eyes – in surprise.

“Jiyeon unnie…” she barely whispered.

“What did you say?” Dawon couldn’t understand why her friend was acting like this. She saw her friend from the moment Luda bumped into that blonde girl until she stared at the door.

“Jiyeon unnie,” Luda said again, to let Dawon hear her.

“What the… Lee Luda! Wake up! What the hell is wrong with you? What do you mean Jiyeon unnie?” Dawon held Luda’s shoulder then shook her a bit.

Luda finally realizes from her own world. She blinked blankly. Her face visibly showed confusion and distraction.

“Let’s go home. Forget about bingsoo,” Dawon pulled Luda’s hand, leading her out of the café.

-

“Jiyeon unnie!!!” Luda woke up from her sleep. She was breathless. She felt sweat on her forehead, despite the aircon was already cooling the room. ‘It’s those dreams again’. She sighed.

Her bedroom door suddenly opened from outside, her best friend came in. “I heard your shout. Did you have those dreams again?” Dawon approached her, sitting at the side of her bed.

“Yeah, the usual,” Luda replied weakly.

“But it has been months since you stopped getting those dreams,” Dawon frowned. “Care to tell me what’s going on at bingsoo café this evening? Why were you suddenly mentioning her name?”

“I- I don’t know. Her presence felt very familiar. Her stare, her smile. When she held my arm, I felt… I don’t know, Dawon-ah. I could feel Jiyeon unnie was there too,” Luda buried her face in her palms.

“Shh…It’s just your feelings, Luda,” Dawon hugged the smaller girl. “You missed her so much. We are all missing her,” Dawon could feel the girl in her hug slightly trembling. “Let it out. Let all your feelings out, you will feel much better, then”.

“I miss her, Dawon-ah. I love her. Why did she leave me? Why, Dawon?” Luda wailed. “I need her but she left me. We still have many things to do together but she broke our promise. There is still much on her wish list that she still hasn’t accomplished yet. She said she wants to go for a trip, all of us. She also wants to introduce me to her sister who is studying in America, but she left me hanging. I love her so much. Why do I have to face this? Why me? I can’t, Dawon. I can’t, I’m so tired. I can’t live like this anymore. I miss her like crazy”.

Dawon didn’t reply to anything. Just letting her best friend weep in her arms, in the middle of night. The same routine for almost every night since a year ago, after Jiyeon left them. She rubbed the girl’s back in a circle – comforting her.

“She loves you too. She wants you to be happy. You must let her go, Luda. I know it’s hard, but you need to move on,” Dawon said when Luda finally calmed herself.

Dawon pulled away the hug, then let the girl lie on the bed.

“I’ll accompany you until you fall asleep,” she fixed the cover on Luda’s body.