younghoon yawned the moment he pushed his bedroom door open to head out to the kitchen - hair all astray and his eyes squinted in a sleepy manner. "wow, you look like crap.", hyunjae smirked as he spotted the dude dragging his feet across the floor like a zombie. younghoon responded to this by crinkling his nose and giving the latter the middle finger to which hyunjae laughed at.

"oh, hoon, we're having cereal! you want any?", jacob stated while pouring in his favourite cereal on a bowl followed by some milk which he believes was the perfect way to eat the treat. "sure, hyung.", the boy smiled and occupied the empty seat next to juyeon who's seen reading a newspaper.

"ah, hyung.", juyeon chimmed as he fished out what seemed to be a neatly prepared envelop which contained a handwritten letter in it. "took it from the mail earlier. i don't know who it's from but i believe it's yours.", he mentioned, tapping the pad of his fingers at the back where the word "for kim younghoon" was written in cursive.

younghoon's sleepiness had been brushed off at an instant the moment he was able to land his deep pair of orbs unto the writing - abruptly recognizing whose it was and placing the puzzle pieces together as to who it came from.

"that's y/n's, isn't it", they shifted from their seats a little as they heard chanhee's cold voice from behind them, his fiery eyes automatically locking with younghoon's softer ones. younghoon gulped, on the inside of his cheek as he diverted his gaze back towards the letter given to him, feeling both nervousness and curiosity.

"aren't you going to read it?", chanhee broke the silence and heaved the deepest sigh ever. "it's the least you could do.", he added before turning to walk away and mind his own business.

juyeon cleared his throat awkwardly and wandered his eyes elsewhere before taking a sip from his coffee. younghoon then looked at jacob who watched the entire scene unfold before his eyes without a word and reacted to his gaze by whistling and shoving a spoonful of cereal in his mouth. "y-yum."

younghoon exhaled, stood up and sauntered back to his room, countless thoughts filling his head. just as he was about to pull the door open, chanhee, whose room was located at the opposite side, spoke. "you really messed up on that one.", the same hoarfrost tone was still visible in his voice.

"i know what i've done. i've regretted it so much..", he replied, not facing the latter since he knew he'd just break at the sight of his best friend's eyes filled with disappointment.

"did you even love her?"

"of course i did, choi chanhee.", he was now clenching his fists as he snapped his head to look at the younger's direction, sending a glare up his way. "i loved her ve-"

younghoon wasn't even able to properly finish what he had to say as chanhee interrupted him by bursting into a short fit of bitter laughter.

"if you loved my sister then you wouldn't have cheated on the first place! you should never hurt someone you love and that's exactly what you did!", chanhee screamed, orbs glassy and ready to give younghoon the strongest punch he could ever muster but he didn't. and with that, he got in his room and slammed the door shut so loud that it woke up the other boyz if his shouting still hasn't done that

silence ensued.

"what.. did i miss?", eric's head popped from his room followed by sunwoo shushing and pulling him back inside. "idiot!", the latter exclaimed as he gave younghoon an apologetic grin.

younghoon bit the inside of his bottom lip as he entered his shelter, softly leaning his back against the door to close it. his eyes never tore away from her handwriting this time until he's reached his bed and as he sat on the comfortable mattress, his finger slowly took the letter out.

i'm a jerk.

and with that, he began reading.

younghoon,

i obviously did not know what went wrong with us but i'm guessing it all started when you began distancing yourself from me no matter how much i tried to reach out.. like the sun and the moon chasing each other in repeat as time elapses, from the way your pair of orbs didn't show the same glint you had when your gaze drifted upon me like before.. your stares already looked oh so lifeless as if you were watching a random tom and jerry show like any other day, from the way you spoke whenever i asked you how your day went, the way your brows would furrow in annoyance as you'd tell me it was 'amazing', how sarcastic you seemed and it broke my heart thinking that you could actually talk like that towards me when i was asking you nicely and sincerely, not care of how i would feel as a consequence, from the way you never answered my calls and texts anymore saying that you're busy and you had no time in your hands. i've also noticed that you've become little too free, i must say, that you forgot the little bond we have. well, had.

love, you began distancing yourself from me and inched your way towards her. i've become the sun. why didn't you look at me anymore? did i irritate your eyes? you've become the moon and she's likened to the stars. you two paint the dark expanse of the summer sky just perfectly and here i am left all alone in all the heat, playing tag with the both of you.

love, you didn't look at me the same way anymore. the excitement in your eyes faded like the wind - and somehow, the adoration and love which blossomed from us before latched unto her, and now she is your juliet and you, her romeo. suddenly, i am tybalt. a nuisance to the romance you are bringing.

love, the tone in your voice changed. i never knew you could be so harsh. didn't i have the right to care? at least i once had. a simple "hello, how was your day" and you'd resort with a huge grunt and go away. "what did i do wrong?", i beg for answers but all you do is leave me to stutter. i never saw you answering her like that. the way you used to talk to me- all forgotten. the way you used to talk to me, the way you talk to her now.

love, you've felt freedom in the most abusive way possible. you've become so free you forgot about me. how come you've got time ticking like a fired bullet when it comes to me yet you have all the time in your hands when you are with her? what is it with her that you forgot me? was it the way her eyes shimmered? was it the way her lips curve up into the most beautiful smile you've ever seen? was it the way she holds you tight at night when you're out of my embrace? was it the way she whispers sweet fallacies into your ear as if it's the first time you've ever heard such words? was it the way she lulled you into her?

love, i'm trying to fight but you're not making it any easy for me. i'm trying to take back what's mine but she pulls you unto her like a magnet- and i'm just a mere resistor. maybe the both of you are opposite charges and i'm likened to you? for like charges repel and opposite charges attract.

what happened? didn't you tell me that we'll be together, always? didn't you tell me that no matter what happens, you will still love me the same? that no matter how hard it gets, nothing will change? but why? why'd you tell her the things you told me before?

i'm sorry if i wasn't enough. i'll let you go if that's what you want. everything you told her, please live by it unlike how you've clearly sprouted lies to me. everything you've done to her, don't cease like how you've stopped loving me. everything you promised her so far, don't break it like how you broke me.

and most of all, take her to the moon for me.

was yours,
y/n

younghoon wept as if there was no tomorrow. he was speechless and he felt the stabbing pain of regret filling him up. words couldn't explain how mad he was for being such a jerk and now he's lost the one person who kept him going.

i still love you

♡

BERRY'S NOTE (●’◡’●)ﾉ🍓
how was this one? i'd love to read your insights in the comments ♡ younghoon's the sweetest boy and i regret turning him into a cheater for this shot 😢 also, i'd appreciate it berry much if you gave this a vote and do subscribe for more! 🥺

berry here, wishing you the best day ahead ♡~