People talking, kids crying, people coughing and mothers begging, as distress and hopelessness filled up every heart, and there was nowhere else to go.

She looked around, feeling out of place. Her mother was by her side, stiff as a statue and eyeing everyone around her as if the smallest movement might attract the attention of a dangerous predator. Unknowingly, she caught herself mirroring her mother's actions when a soft vibration startled her. She was soon comforted that it was only her phone buzzing in her pocket and nothing more. Bringing it out, she read the new text, and the usual cheerfulness of her best friend, Baekhyun, welcomed her.

Get completely checked up and punch that nasty cough right in the face!

She didn't have a chance to write a response when another text came in.

Don't you dare stand me up today. We have a lot to catch up!

And I have a surprise for you ;)

That managed to bring a smile out of her because there was no need to catch up as he claimed. As hectic as their normal life was, Baekhyun forced her to meet at least once a week. He would pester her for days if they didn't.

She texted back, assuring him that she would be there as soon as she was done with her appointment. The thought brought her back to the real world, where everyone was patiently, or not so patiently, waiting for their turn to see a doctor.

Making the mistake of looking around the waiting area, the uneasiness took over her again and reminded her of all of the excuses she had to skip a doctor’s appointment. First of all, the unnerving crowd alone was scary enough to stay away from a hospital but this time, as much as she tried, there was no other choice.

The other reason was more complicated and delicate than just being uncomfortable in crowds because going to a hospital meant speaking with strangers and she avoided approaching people she didn’t know. She even struggled to talk to her family doctor that pretty much watched her grow. Maybe he wasn't even the right person to take her case but he knew her and she knew him. If someone knew about her particular discomfort and understood how to handle it, it was him.

However, her fear and condition couldn't outweigh the seriousness of her current state and the main reason why she was in the hospital in the first place. She'd been having an ongoing cough for several months and after using almost every remedy available, her parents finally managed to convince her to get a specialized check-up. The doctor ordered blood samples and a few days later, there she was, seated in the waiting room of the general hospital.

In an ideal scenario, she would’ve been doing this by herself as the responsible and capable adult she was but her anxiousness didn’t allow it. Her mother was there and even if she didn't need to guide their way throughout the sterile and monotone hallways of the hospital for something as simple as a doctor’s appointment, it was incredibly comforting to have her around.

“Kang Gyuri.” A nurse called out loud and her mother stood up like a sprint.

“That’s us.” She mumbled with sudden haste that couldn’t be anything else but desire to leave the place as soon as possible.

Gyuri followed her mother silently and the nurse proceeded to make the general checkup. She didn’t mind that part of the appointment. No speaking was required for that and she followed the nurse’s instructions carefully until she was seated at the doctor’s desk in a heavy silence and with her mother just as silent by her side.

The old man came in not long after and he greeted them with the same familiarity as he always did but Gyuri noticed the hesitation. She caught the few seconds of vacillation and effort it took him to raise his eyes and look at her. Quite discreetly, he managed to avert looking straight into her. 

“So Gyuri, now tell me how have you been feeling since your visit last week?” He asked, grabbing the expensive black and gold stricken pen her parents gave him as a present not that long ago and ready to write down whatever she was about to say. “Did the antibiotics and painkillers work?”

“I don’t know.” 

“How come?”

And that was what she hated the most out of the doctor’s appointment, the explaining. Gyuri found it almost painful to put her discomfort into words, to say them out loud and on top of that, to make absolute sense of the mess within her. She wasn’t even entirely sure if anyone was capable of covering all the complexities of what was happening inside her body. 

She started with the fact that she had been feeling almost the same except for the sharp chest pains weren't as bad as before and noticed as she said that, that Dr. Kim held the pen softly between the fingers of both of his hands and wondered why he wasn't scribbling down. That was odd. That wasn’t part of the process of a medical appointment.

Gyuri continued nonetheless by explaining the difficulty she had to breathe every once in a while and when she mentioned that a new symptom had shown up, it was when she couldn’t ignore the doctor’s expression. He looked conflicted and somehow, distressed.

“What’s the new symptom?” He asked although he looked like he didn’t want to know.

“It feels like my senses are sharper, somehow.” She wondered out loud and not entirely sure if she was making any sense, “now I have a sweet tooth for food.”

With a nod, the doctor finally wrote something down but it was short. For a second, Gyuri thought she saw the word unsuccessful written down in her chart but the doctor brought another sheet out, this one with what she guessed was her blood results.

“I don't know how to say this,” he started, placing the pen reluctantly over his desk as if he was letting go some sort of lifeline. “We found some anomalies in your blood levels, Gyuri.”

“What kind of anomalies?” Her mother asked in a surprisingly steady tone.

“There are traces of chlorophyll in your bloodstream when you shouldn't have any and I'm so sorry to be the one to say this so bluntly...” The old man managed to say before his voice broke, “but you have the Hanahaki disease.”

The small consultation room was suddenly quiet just like everything else inside Gyuri. Her mind was completely blank in a split second when her mother’s seemed to be overrun by a sudden sense of guilt.

“This is my fault.” She said with a shaky voice.

“Don’t say that.” Dr. Kim added.

“This is all my fault.” Her mother said, now sobbing.

“That’s not how it works.” Dr. Kim affirmed and then looked at Gyuri.

“But no petals…” She muttered, her brain trying to come to life and make some sense of what was happening.

“The flower petals are only in the last stages of the disease.” The doctor explained. “You haven't shown any signs that the roots are that deep into your system yet.”

“What are my options?”

“Not many, you know that.” The doctor said with some difficulty, “As a doctor, I’d suggest getting you admitted, run some more tests and make you feel as comfortable as possible whereas as a family friend, I’d say, go home and live to the utmost while you can.”

“How long?” Gyuri asked, knowing she didn’t have to elaborate for the doctor to understand what she meant.

“If nothing abrupt happens, my guess is,” he paused, his brows furrowing, “6 months, at most.”

Gyuri nodded, aware of everything and nothing at the same time. Just as the doctor said, she knew her life was done for and suddenly flooded by a horrible feeling of devastation, the rest of the appointment went by as a blur.

She managed to get herself together when she was walking through the hospital’s parking lot. So far, she was moving by sheer instinct and being her mother’s quiet sobbing by her side, the only thing ringing loudly on her head.

“Mom, I'll be fine,” she said with a firm tone that took her by surprise.

Even though Gyuri didn't quite believe it herself, she had to make her mother stop crying for a moment and get her thoughts in order but her efforts of assurance only made her wail harder.

“Who is he?” She demanded, holding her by the shoulders. “Tell me who it is!”

Suddenly, Gyuri felt her body again. She felt the soft and ever-present buzzing in the center of her chest and the pain of her mother’s fingertips dipping into her flesh in absolute distress to find the truth and a culprit. Seeing her mother that desperate was unnerving.

“Who's the bastard that's breaking your heart!?” Her mother begged.

Gyuri smiled. 

Mother Nature seemed to have some wicked sense of humor. As twisted and creepy as it was to smile at that moment and to her mother’s absolute distress, she shook her up more but Gyuri couldn’t feel anything else but a sudden wave of relief coming over her. It wasn’t hard to conclude who it was. There wasn't anyone else that she could be that attached to to the point of getting heartbroken. She wanted to laugh at the prospect of her being that blind to not see this outcome. 

“Baekhyun, mom,” she said, almost fondly, “Who else but Baekhyun?”

And his name was a trigger. 

Gyuri winced as soon as she said his name and the relief she felt just an instant before was replaced by a sudden pain that coursed through the deepest parts of her system as if the acknowledgment of the genuine cause of her disease could set off something inside her body.

Her mother paled at the confession and Gyuri saw the anger taking over her expression. Now she knew who was responsible and it didn’t matter how many times she claimed in the past that she loved him like a son, from that moment on, Baekhyun was an enemy she needed to get rid of.

“Don't tell him anything about this,” Gyuri added before her mother could fall into hysterics. “It’s not his fault.”

“Not his fault?” Her mother scoffed, “He took advantage of your friendship...”

“And I want to be alone.” Gyuri interrupted, starting to feel lightheaded. “I’ll see you later.”

Her mother protested. Her body battled back as well, but she forced herself to walk to the bus stop, and with every step, Gyuri did her best to remember every breathing and grounding exercise she could. Eventually, she was almost running because if she didn’t leave that hospital as soon as possible, none of the exercises would help and she would end up collapsing right then and there.

As she waited in the line and memories flowed by her mind, Gyuri placed a hand over her chest expecting to feel her rapidly beating heart but now, she was particularly aware of the faint stinging that went from one side of her chest to the other like an anxious caged animal waiting to be released.

Never in her wildest dreams, she’d find herself brave enough to ride public transportation alone and almost a decade later, there she was, ready to take the bus as if it was nothing and it was all thanks to Baekhyun.

"Ay, you’re not a little girl anymore.” He nagged as they waited. “How have you been commuting to school all this time?"

"My parents drive me there.” She replied softly, looking around suddenly intimidated by what they were about to do.

"What about the dates?” He turned to her, looking genuinely concerned. “Your parents dropping you off makes it a child’s play date..."

“I don’t have them,” Gyuri mumbled back, annoyed at the unnecessary roast, “you know that.”

“You don’t have them because you don’t want to,” Baekhyun said as he pulled his wallet out, “You’re quite pretty.”

Gyuri found herself smiling as she remembered that day. She felt her heart fluttering all over again at the memory of how flustered she was when he said that and while she was getting on the bus, she felt the ghost of his steady hand holding hers as reassurance.

That simple memory was only the first of the many moments she treasured about her frien