I love you, I love you not

Push and Pull
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“I’m home.” Momo greets as she struggles to open the main door to their apartment. Not a second later, she trips into a discarded jacket on the floor. Luckily for her, she hasn’t let go of the door knob yet. She huffs, fixing her wet hair, looking around if people had seen the disgrace, and then frowns when she sees toppled shoes a few feet from her– signaling who’s already inside. She had just been to her last cheerleading practice of her life, and she’s been aching for a hot bath.

“Tzuyu, help me~~”

A giggle.

“No thanks. Better you than me.”

A gasp. “Abandoning me at the time of need, I will remember this, Tzu!”

Hearing the voices from the depths of the apartment, Momo braced herself. “That damn snake never learns.” Momo hisses as she picks up the jacket, puts it over her arm, then picks up the shoes on her way to the sofa. As she walks, she says, “Sana, when I said you should treat this as your home too, it didn’t just mean I’m being a good host.” She stops in front of the sofa, blocking their view of the TV, ignoring the collective groan. She drops her duffel bag with a thud on the floor, and puts both her hands to her hips. She throws the jacket towards the now brown haired girl, more determined to interrupt her. “It also means clean up every once in a while so the actual residents don’t trip over your things!”

When Sana pulls away from cuddling to the new addition to the group and whines as she removes the jacket that’s now covering her face, Momo continues, “Are you a snake? Why do you shred everywhere you go?!” Then Momo throws her shoes near Sana’s feet.

Sana playfully hisses and sticks out her tongue in reply. She giggles when Momo just crosses her arms. The moment she stepped foot in the 43B, she removed her coat and shoes and then run towards the sofa to plop herself down.

Momo rolls her eyes and decided to leave it at that. She swears she loves the girl but she doesn’t have the energy to fight over something so small. She chooses to ignore Sana whose arms are wrapped around Jihyo, resuming to attempt to kiss the girl. That’s another bill to her “Clingy” jar. Just as she promised, once the girl was eased in, she started forgetting about personal boundaries and invaded Jihyo’s.

She turns her head towards Tzuyu who’s grinning silently at the side. Momo relaxes her shoulders and calls her attention, “Tzuyu, what are you doing next weekend?”

Tzuyu turns to her, blinking slowly as she hums, thinking it over. Momo chuckles then says, “Come with me. We’re going camping.”

From the kitchen, Jeongyeon comes with a pitcher and bowl of popcorn. She settles them on the table and then laughs. “Good one.” She takes a sit next to Tzuyu at the end of the couch, nudging the girl to move over.

Tzuyu does, and closes the gap with Jihyo. She takes piece from the bowl and pops it to then says, “You hate camping.”

Momo shrugs, “Apparently the squad voted for a send-off event for the graduating and it won. Something along a bonfire, a lake and fireworks.”

Jeongyeon says, “You can do that on the beach.”

“That’s what I said!” Momo exclaims. “But seems like we didn’t have a say on the matter. Which is ironic ‘cause it’s a party for us! I swear I hate the incoming captain.”

Sana pulls away from Jihyo to grab a food for herself too and then pouts, “I’m feeling neglected Momoring! Why are you not inviting me?”

“Clingy much?” Momo retorts, laughing as she does.

At the same time, Tzuyu says, “Jar!”

Sana whines then begrudgingly gets a bill from her wallet then walked towards the shelf behind Momo and puts it inside the jar with purple lid at the farthest left, that has a label, “Clingy Jar”.

“You also don’t like camping. Actually, the only one who does in this group is Tzuyu.” Jeongyeon comments, laughing at Sana’s retreating figure. She peaks into the other side of Tzuyu, “Jihyo, do you like camping?”

Jihyo shrugs her shoulders, “I wouldn’t say it’s a hobby, but I wouldn’t mind going.”

It’s at the tip of Momo’s tongue, I didn’t invite you, but she doesn’t say it. She takes a deep breath watching the interaction instead. The two of them have never hang out on their own, but usually, Momo doesn’t feel like ripping Jihyo’s hair. But when Jihyo looks at Tzuyu like she’s the most precious gem in the world and Tzuyu (had the audacity) to reciprocate the affection with a shy smile, Momo clenches her fists as a reaction.

Sana rebuts, “Even so. It would’ve been nice to be invited,” mumbling as she said so.

Momo rolls her eyes, “Okay… Do you want to come?”

Like a complete 180, Sana giggles and then extends both her arms towards Momo, mimicking a baby, “Yes!”

“This sounds like a recipe to disaster.” Jeongyeon says throwing a popcorn to Sana.

Tzuyu glares at them and says, “Last time we went camping, I did all the work while you two complain about mosquito bites and the absence of electricity.”

“This will be different. There’s booze and lots of food.”

Dahyun raises her hand and Momo nods at her, “I’ll pass.” When she hears them groaning, she continues, “And this is your fault. You chose Wrong Turn last movie night.”

“It’s a good movie.” Momo says, earning a nod from Sana and a head shake from Tzuyu.

Jeongyeon snorts, “I don’t vibe with cheerleaders so I’ll pass as well.”

Momo points to herself and then says, “I’m a cheerleader.”

Jeongyeon nods, “I didn’t like you at first.”

The four laughs, except for Momo who pouts. She grabs her towel drenched with her sweat and throws it to Jeongyeon and says, “I’m your wife, so who cares about first impressions?” Jeongyeon was Momo’s first college friend. They met on Orientation and became friends ever since.

Jeongyeon doesn’t allow to be defeated on the bickering she started. She grimaces as she smells the offending towel and then dropped it on the side of the couch, “Was. We had a divorce because you’re disgusting! I don’t know how you got custody of our child.” Jeongyeon taps Tzuyu’s leg next to her and let it stays there.

Momo points at her, “Tzuyu is not our child! And stop being inappropriate!”

Jeongyeon narrows her eyes, making a face, “I’m not the one coming in while she showers, am I?”

“Grrr…” Momo growls. “You’ll never get in on our level so stay jealous, I guess.” Momo declares to Jeongyeon so it seems but the message is clear. Jeongyeon doubles in laughter. It’s always fun to mess with Momo.

Jeongyeon teases, “Just for that reaction, count me in.” Sana laughs as she points her finger at Jeongyeon’s response. It’ll definitely be fun.

Tzuyu shakes her head but smiles anyway. Momo knows she’s sold. Tzuyu looks at her then side-eyes Jihyo. Momo just stares.

Then… Tzuyu pouts, tilting her head to side again.

Momo groans mentally then sighs, “Jihyo, would you like to come as well?”

Tzuyu and Sana perk up at the invitation. Momo would fight the urge to roll her eyes.

Jihyo smiles, “Sweet. I’ll bring my water guns.”

“…or maybe she’d like the other one? The blue one? Or should I also get her a box and then put our Polaroid pics in there and write some letter? Nah, she’s done that for me last year…” Tzuyu puts the red coat back to the rack and then continues to wander off around the store, sulking a little. “Also, I’m not really good with letters…”

If you ask Dahyun who her favorite is in Team Alien, Momo and Sana would have a debate that will last for hours, only for them to throw tantrums in the end when Dahyun inevitably says it’s Tzuyu. Like that time Dahyun got a chocolate basket and Momo and Sana were waiting expectantly at her, only for her to gave it all to Tzuyu for Valentines.

The first time she sees her at her Lit Class, she went and said, “So how’s the air up there?” tapping her head and Tzuyu’s. And then the next thing Tzuyu knows, Dahyun is sitting next to her in every class. It doesn’t matter what row, what column Tzuyu sits in, Dahyun would be there next to her, probing they’d be friends. (Tzuyu is convinced she attracts the crazies.)

In Dahyun’s book, it takes patience and effort to see Tzuyu’s comfort and vulnerability. Even when she becomes one of Tzuyu’s closest friends, she’d still be patient with her, wrapping her mind around Tzuyu’s way of thinking. She follows Tzuyu out the store and to the next confused, “Tzuyu…” She can recount 3 stores that they had went through, only for them to go out empty-handed. They had been going round the mall and she can actually feel her feet ache. Not to mention, they had bought supplies for the upcoming camping, so their hands are full of grocery bags.

Tzuyu turns to her and matches her pace, “Hmm?”

“Didn’t we get a graduation gift for Momo-unnie last week already?”

“That’s for Jeongyeon-unnie.”

“Huh… I thought the bag was totally Momo-unnie’s style.”

“Ah… yes. That’s for her,” Tzuyu said like it cleared any confusion Dahyun has. It didn’t. Dahyun opens but no words came out. She puts her finger onto her chin thinking it over. Sometimes, Tzuyu’s brain function differently, thus the nickname Alien. Tzuyu waits for her patiently tiptoeing in her spot. Dahyun looks up to her one more time and then says, “So what are we getting today?”

For Tzuyu’s part, she did try to explain that she had to go big on Momo’s graduation gift. Try being the operative word. And as Tzuyu gathers her thoughts, putting it into sentence, Dahyun couldn’t help but feel something inexplicable exploding inside her as Tzuyu puffs her cheeks, her eyebrows furrowing, and her hands closing into fists at every word trying to get her message out. (How can something so tiny on the inside be this tall?) Anyways, the sentences were unclear but the message was something along: Sana getting Momo something sentimental, and Heechul getting her something expensive… and then Tzuyu ending it with a sigh and, “How can I compete?” And oh, how Tzuyu struggled to play it cool.

Dahyun felt like she needed a hug, so she gave her one. A warm one. And luckily, Tzuyu doesn’t shrug it off.

“When did graduating gifts get that much pressure?” Dahyun says as she rubs Tzuyu’s arm. She thinks it over and then whispers, “I got her a T-shirt that says Welcome to Unemployment!” She shakes her head and then says, “I thought it’d be funny… Why does everything have to be a competition? Is Jihyo rubbing off on you?”

They were meeting Jeongyeon for dinner. While they wait on the booth, Tzuyu asks, “Were you bored?”

Sana hums as she scrolls through her phone. She doesn’t lose her smile, but she did look up to Tzuyu, “Hmmm. No.” She paused and then says, “It’s different. I wouldn’t say it made an impact on me but I wouldn’t mind going again.”

“Going again? There’s no again.” Tzuyu frowns and recounts the events of the day.

Yesterday, right after therapy, Sana had asked what Tzuyu’s plan is the next day. It’s Momo’s date night and Sana wanted to hangout. Tzuyu said there’s an exhibit she’d be going to, Sana had said, “Cool. Can I come?”

Tzuyu blinked her eyes then did a double take on Sana. “Did you hear me? I said I’m going to an art exhibit.”

Sana nods, without looking up to her phone, “Yeah. 4pm tomorrow, right?”

“Us discussing every piece was entertaining for the first three, and then you started saying you can draw better and everything was overpriced, you almost embarrassed us in front of the artist.” Tzuyu continues, grimacing as she did so.

As if on cue, Jeongyeon takes a seat across them. She settles her small pouch on the table and then grins, “Hi. What are we talking about?”

“Sana-unnie being rude to the artist.”

Sana gasps, “I wasn’t rude! She was pretentious.”

“Doesn’t mean you should say it to her face.”

“I smiled while saying that.”

“That just makes it worse!”

“I don’t know what Sana did but I agree with her.”

Sana giggled and high-fived with Jeongyeon, throwing a wink towards Tzuyu’s direction. Tzuyu rolled her eyes in response.

Jeongyeon was in the middle of sharing itinerary for her supposed paid vacation trip care of her parents after graduation, with both Tzuyu and Sana suggesting locations when Tzuyu asks, “Are you sure you can’t leave Nanan to me ‘till you get back?” Tzuyu can already imagine parting ways with the cute dog, her (unofficial) emotional companion. Jeongyeon hasn’t said it yet, and although she had said she might grab some experience from High-end restaurants in the city for a while, but she knows she’d highly take over the family business in her hometown.

“Your apartment doesn’t allow pets.”

“I’m looking at new ones.”

“Huh…” Jeongyeon chuckles, “To accommodate Nanan?” She takes a sip from her drink, clicking her tongue, “Points for dedication, I guess.”

Tzuyu frowns, shaking her head, “I talked to Jihyo. She said she needs another room for study ‘cause she has a big drawing table and she wants a place to put her things all over.”

At that, Sana decides to chime in, “Why do you sound serious?”

Tzuyu looks to her, but eventually avoided her eyes, “’Cause I am?”

Sana’s eyes widen comically and grasps at Tzuyu’s arm, “Wait, catch me up. What’s wrong with 43B?”

Jeongyeon presses her lips in a thin line and then switches to her serious tone, “I know we’ve talked about this but are you really moving out? Have you talked to Momo about this?”

Sana is still in confusion, “You talked about moving out? Tzuyu, what’s going on?”

Tzuyu’s face scrunches her nose and then says, “I think the better question is, has she talked to me about it yet? I know she’s moving out after graduation. ”

“What?!”

Ignoring Sana’s shriek, Tzuyu continues, “Her interviews are always at least 30 minutes from our place. I’m sure she’s even highly considering applying where she interned at to be closer to her boyfriend.” Tzuyu mumbles, “That’s three transfers of commute.”

Not settling it yet, Sana prods, clinging to Tzuyu’s arm even tighter as she goes, “But Tzuyu~~, your neighbor is a nice auntie who thinks I should date her son and gives me cookies every Fridays.”

“What auntie? The next unit next to ours has been empty since two months ago.”

A stagnant pause.

Then Sana’s face contorted to this weird expression which is probably a mix of fear and indifference. Jeongyeon and Tzuyu laughs in sync, pointing to her. Sana whines, throwing her tissue to both of them,  “That’s mean! Ahh~~ Tzuyu!! If I have nightmares tonight, I will stop giving you my snacks!”

Jeongyeon laughs then points to Sana, “your face was like…” She imitates her expression, exaggerating it a bit. Then doubling in laughter seeing Sana’s pout.

“Ahh~~”

When the laughter died down, Sana continues the subject at hand, “Wait, are you really moving out? Why don’t you just ask me to move in?” Sana knows Momo is not moving out. She had never mentioned it. But for this conversation, she will humor Tzuyu and play it out.

Tzuyu scoffs.

Sana crosses her arms, “Why not?”

“How do I say this nicely… I like you, but if I have to spend more time with you than we do now, I think I might hit you in the face…”

Jeongyeon chuckles, “That’s the nice version?”

“And here I thought, you and I had gotten closer.” Sana winked at her.

“Wait, where are you applying? Isn’t your place closer to where you interned for?” Tzuyu takes a sip from her drink but waits for Sana’s answer.

Sana sinks into her seat and then says, “I won’t be graduating this semester.”

Tzuyu chokes on her drink. Jeongyeon drops her fork to her salad, “What?”

“Yeah… I didn’t pass one of my Majors.”

“Wait. What? Why are we only hearing about this now?—"

“Is that why you have been upset?--”

Sana chose to ignore Jeongyeon and then turns to Tzuyu, “Was it obvious?”

Tzuyu could say they had went to therapy for almost everyday that week. They don’t talk about their problems so Tzuyu would have no idea what’s bothering Sana. And when Tzuyu came to Sana’s place to pick her up for the exhibit, she saw someone different coming out of her place from the previous day. Alas, she opted to say, “Uhm… you haven’t stolen from my fries could be one indication.”

Sana would always say she digs Tzuyu’s humor. She smiles in response, grateful that Tzuyu had taken that route instead of stating the obvious. She then grabs a stick from Tzuyu’s plate, scooting close to Tzuyu, leaving no space in between them.

 Tzuyu doesn’t mind the action and says, “Who knows? That you’re not graduating yet?”

“Momo.” Sana laughs, “I think she’s more depressed than me. I’m just trying to get by.” Tzuyu nods at that. She’s curious as to why Momo hasn’t said anything yet.

“My parents.”

“How did that go?” Jeongyeon had finally found her voice.

“Lots of tears. Not gonna lie.” Sana swallows her fries and then continues, “I mean, they were consoling me and stuff. I was just afraid I disappointed them… that I disappointed myself.” She shrugs, trying to play it cool. She looks at them both, “And then now, you guys.”

Tzuyu’s thinking of what to think when Sana pulls her in and puts her hand on her face, the other on her hair messing with it a bit. Tzuyu whines and tries to pull away, but kept her voice low, afraid she’ll attract attention from the other onlookers. She glares at her and nudges Sana with her elbow. Who’s supposed to be consoling who? Sana just giggles then loops their arms together. “I told you because I know you wouldn’t cry for me, or console me.”

“I’m not heartless, you know.”

“I know, I know. I just meant… there’s comfort in silence as well. My mind has b

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k1mtzuyu
#1
Chapter 10: A little disappointed on how Momo reacted but, people might react differently to situations. Aside from that, the drama was always intense
bore_d1020 #2
Chapter 10: Is SaMoTzu the end game now?! I really do wonder. And what’s between Sana and Momo? I think Sana likes Tzuyu too but does she see Momo as more than friends thou? What’s the story behind Sana’s “therapy”? Well… at least Tzuyu confessed first and not just ghosted Momo for that. Although I was a little afraid coz technically Tzuyu lied to Mina right?! But oh wells… I guess Jihyo was right. Momo was real~ dense abt Tzuyu loving her more than just friends. Poor Mina but I think she aldy felt as much if not more between MoTzu.
ceralamperouge516
#3
Chapter 10: <3<3<3
Pallas
#4
Chapter 10: And finally it's here
The confession AND Momo seeing them together
Feels like I've been waiting for so long lol
Thanks for the chapter, author-nim!
Mikayla27 #5
Chapter 10: Pls let them be together soon omg
k1mtzuyu
#6
Chapter 9: Noooooo, Momo why are your hurting Tzuyu 😭😭😭😭
ceralamperouge516
#7
Chapter 9: <3<3<3
Dead_pan
#8
Chapter 8: the outtakes and the "!" "..?" part is so 😭😭😭😭😭😭
bore_d1020 #9
Chapter 8: Wahahaha… was Tzuyu using tips from Dahyun on Momo all day at the amusement park? LoL…. It was funny but I think Tzuyu finally took things in her own hands towards the end thou! I really hope Momo finally get the hint and say/confirm something with Tzuyu.
k1mtzuyu
#10
Chapter 8: TZUYU HAS TO FIGHT FOR MOMO, COME ON!!! She had finally figured it out!!!!! Ps, I am rofl at the outtakes lol