Solarium Hwabyul as high school students. Less complicated world.

 

“Every atom you possess has almost certainly passed through several stars and been part of millions of organisms on its way to becoming you. We are each so atomically numerous and so vigorously recycled at death that a significant number of our atoms– up to a billion for each of us, it has been suggested–probably once belonged to Shakespeare. A billion more each came from Buddha and Genghis Khan and Beethoven, and any historical figures you care to name.”

-Bill Bryson, A Really Short History of Nearly Everything

 

 

 

What is inevitable about her being here, what is her existence?

 

Ahn Hyejin can never make sense of it all, although that doesn't mean she cannot find any semblance of normalcy as a high school student. Going to a prestigious RBW High, a private high school with the lowest acceptance rate (which means mostly sons and daughters of affluent people from different paths of life can be accepted, but Hyejin like to think that her painstaking days and nights of studying the same material over and over is what got her the LoA in the first place), having students flocked to her side at the first day of school and becoming one of the few to get a clique at the earliest week of school year (although she can't remember their names or taking any interest in whatever they're saying), and born as a goddaughter to her parent's friend, and eventually becoming an officially adopted daughter of Ahn Do, the sole proprietor of several mansions scattered all over South Korea, the very friend whom she later found out is what the public called the Father, a mafia.

 

An identity as a mafia’s daughter that put her in this absurd situation in this convenience store at night, face to face with a stranger that posed a question that is just as strange.

 

"Can I take a look at your leg?"

 

What this creep refers to is her prosthetic left leg, coated in gold with joints painted in the same color, filling the emptiness started from the knee, and the very object of attention that she doesn't need. The question itself is a facade as well, because the gears in her head had set into motion.

 

There's a small knife in the compartment inside her leg. She can count on that before Kyung comes. She just has to buy some time, maybe just swinging it as a distraction. She has to put this down before it escalates into a kidnapping. Hyejin is this close to ducking down before a stern voice interrupts.

 

"You're pulling her."

 

It sounds stern and calm, but as soon as the creep growls he's pinned down to the floor, his hands grappled into a tight lock. He can't help but cry in agony, asking to be let go this instant. There's no way for Hyejin to identify anything else besides a ponytail that jutted out of her washed-up cap.

 

"You have to leave now."

 

--

 

You would think that by this point, Hyejin has enough ranting about how people can never have too many nice things. Please don't misunderstand her, she isn't ranting.

 

But really, people can never have too many nice things. She daresay that repeated attempts of kidnapping is a small price to pay, compared to what the course of her life has taken her. The cashier, the young woman that looked like her age but in spectacles and low ponytail (the cashier decide to loosened it up after the altercation), signaled for her to come and sit behind the counter, giving her a spot to wait when she informed her that her driver's going to pick her up.

 

"Are you okay?"

 

The I am fine came out hoarser than she had intended, but she thinks she managed to sound sure. The cashier (who didn't wear any ID tag so Hyejin doesn't have any idea what to call her) scurried behind the hot buns and pastries counter, leaving her to settle and adapt.

 

The white noise slowly carried away, about to force her into acknowledging the sad affair that is her right hand, trembling like a leaf in the wind, about to crumble and fall any second now. No matter how many times these kinds of occurrences keep happening, Hyejin should be used to it by now.

 

She can't let the stupid nerves get to her. Let's see, maybe observing her surroundings will be a good distraction, like how the white, neon lights fall on the rows of snacks and soda cans that was lined with an immaculate tidying-up method (like the employee has joined Marie Kondo cult or something like it), the coffees and amenities were lined up in the perfect order of rainbow color: red, orange, yellow, green, blue…

 

The silence allowed her ear to catch a rustle nearby, and with a turn she got a cup of piping hot ramen in front of her, the waft is the right kind of spiciness that makes her hold back a sneeze. As Hyejin ripped the chopsticks and was about to dig in, a set of heated sausage on sticks and packaged mandus was served as a side.

 

"Thank you."

 

She didn't know her voice could sound that meek. The cashier without a name just nods once, and with the washed-up cap, there's hardly a way for Hyejin to get a glimpse of any features, let alone her eyes. Only that her voice sounds familiar, and she has no idea why. She starts digging in, slurping the ramen religiously until she realizes something else.

 

The cashier girl is now looking at her. At Hyejin's rapid blinking she points to the hot buns behind the fogged glass. "Want some?"

 

Hyejin declined politely.

 

It's upsetting that even with this feast before her, the hand that's holding chopsticks still trembles, an aftershock that lasts a little longer than usual. Why now, of all days? She really needs to pull herself together. She's about to put her chopsticks away until the cashier calls her out.

 

"Want some help?"

 

"What?"

 

She pointed a finger at her, and there's no doubt on which part of her that she pointed out. The trembles becoming worse than the previous, it's a miracle she can still hold the chopsticks without spilling the ramen all over herself, or someone else at this moment.

 

"May I?"

 

--

 

It turns out what the cashier girl meant by 'help' is a hand massage, which she performed on Hyejin right now. That means she caught Hyejin and her predicament from the very beginning. Why does this feels embarrassing?

 

On a side note, this woman is good at massaging. Surprisingly so. Not too lax or too rough, she's a hit with the right spots and Hyejin resists a compliment on her skill.

 

Still not a good excuse to let a stranger do this to you.

 

The tremble, supposedly, was like it never existed in the first place. Her line of sight caught the black sleeve of the cashier's undershirt inside uniform, and the contraction of her arm muscles as she applied more force to Hyejin's hand only serves to show how toned it is, and she's out of words to say. You're good? Where did you learn how to do this? None of the script can be thrown casually without making everything sound awkward.

 

Perhaps the best course is to just keep shut, but of course nothing ever goes according to plan. "Thank you for this. You're really good."

 

"Is it better now?"

 

Hyejin flashes her first smile since entering that convenience store. "Much better." The woman just nodded again, letting go of her hand and scurrying behind the cashing machine, taking up a thick book that Hyejin assumed was her way to kill time during slow hours at every night shift.

 

Unable to stand another silence, Hyejin blurted out, "What are you reading?"

 

The cover is already telling enough with ATOMS embossed on it with glitter sprinkles. The tip of her nose is followed by her bespectacled eyes as Byulyi regards the question with a look.

 

"You mind telling me? If that's okay."

 

She sends a signal that she's willing to carter her curiosity. If Hyejin were her she would be very annoyed at someone who kept interrupting on what she's about to do. The cashier traces the page she's onto, tracing the last sentence within the tip of her finger. It's dainty, if not a little bony, and Hyejin admits she paid a little too much attention. Maybe. "Humans, when they die, they never disappear, never go out of existence." Her recite starts. "We're just composed of atoms that join and break itself apart, which means that even so far as historical figures like Napoleon. Shakespeare or Genghis Khan… Our atoms might have belonged to them in the past, stitching us and having our fates intertwined at the center of times."

 

"Does that mean… our life belonged to Shakespeare?"

 

It seems to be the right response because it tugged the cashier's side of the lips forward.

 

"Possibly our death as well. Without them, there will be no humanity as it was today." The light in her eyes is enough to light up the whole town. "There will be no you, me, us…"

 

It's a sight that Hyejin has never seen before, putting her in a trance.

 

She's entranced.

 

--

 

6am in the morning.

 

Ahn's Mansion is already bustling with life. In one of the windows of the west wing, Hyejin fell asleep under the duvet. The constant buzzing of her phone under the pillow knocked her out of consciousness before her brows shot up sky high, grasping to the end of her bed, pinching the fabric and letting a sigh at the phantom pain that gives her the illusion of days when her body isn't like it was compared to today.

 

Pulling herself off the bed, she reaches for the crutch and steadying herself on it, going for a morning routine that consists of only a glass of Americano brewed while she's taking a shower, reaching for the towel hung near the basin.

 

--

 

"Hyegi-ah."

 

"Dad." Hyejin ducks down, giving a light kiss on the cheek as Ahn Do hummed deeply, going for an old tune of his younger years. One of the butlers offers a tray of confectionery and sweets, which the young girl turns down nicely, instead spreading the handmade truffle butter on her toast.

 

The patriarch of Ahn Household and Hyejin's stepfather has his nose drown in the newspaper to the point of Hyejin creating a makeshift chime with a fork against the crystal glass. "Dad, please tell Kyung and others to stop sending me off until the schoolgate."

 

"Hm." He lets a neutral response out but judging from the nth time they have this conversation, Hyejin can guess what the answer will be. Something along the lines of "It's risky, Hyegi-ah. I'm in the middle of this deal and during the process, some of their people may resort to unconventional methods and they gave me impressions on how they are quick to begrudge someone."

 

"I don't know how many times they had caught too much attention on school ground." One of them even went so far as ambushed this one kid that once followed her everywhere for no reason. Even the fact that she grew with them didn't make it less embarrassing. A flashback of it is enough for Hyejin to shudder. "I'm grateful, really I am, but I don't need eyes on me every morning and when I go home as well!"

 

"Kyung told me about yesterday night."

 

Hyejin's shoulder slumped. There is no way he would give in to her demand now. More like another hour of reminder of how easily harm can come to her for the sake of getting an upper hand against her stepfather in their business agreement. Even more so when it demanded a lot from both sides. A lot of money is at stake.

 

--

 

"Noonim, noonim."

 

Hyejin only looks outside the window of her limousine, choosing not to say anything to someone who has spilled that she was going through a kidnapping attempt last night at the convenience store. Kyung, a young man whom she grew up with and later appointed as Hyejin's right hand man and confidante by the time she got adopted into Ahn Household, whined. "Noonim! I got the info on the cashier's last night."

 

A sparkle of curiosity lit up her eyes. "Let me see." she said, snatching the yellow binder from the front seat as it was slipped between the tinted glass. But after a long stare on the cover, she shakes her head and hands the binder back to Kyung. "I shouldn't read it."

 

"Why?"

 

"Feels like I invaded her privacy. If it's meant to be, we will meet again."

 

Kyung whistled. "How cool of you, noonim." Hyejin frowned, crossing her arms.

 

"But where have I heard that voice before?"

 

--

 

Every morning is like this.

 

"Make way for Miss Ahn Hyejin!"

 

There is no need for that announcement because every students on school ground already step back and giving way, the daily sight of burly guys and men line up, creating a formation behind a high school girl who fixed her bag awkwardly, stopping here and there to turn and asking them to be on their way; they send her safely anyway. Her golden leg gilded back and forth under the morning sun. The same moment that happened to be interrupted by a bicycle slithering into the school ground, making turns with such easiness. As soon as the bike was parked in the designated spot, the rider entered the building, surreally unaware of the rush that transpired around her.

 

It's the same washed-up cap and long ponytail sticking out, this time waving in the air.

 

Found her.

 

--

 

 

 

Floaty, floaty, dinghy Mcdougherty.

 

In the corner of the Student Council's working room, papers containing student complaints and suggestions are flipped quickly right after another in a robotic, constant space, just for the sake of finishing at least some part of it before the break ends and they have to go back to their class. "How about this one, President?"

 

"Label it as 'verified' and just dump them at the nearest corner of the desk. We shouldn't check more of it again."

 

"Yes, President."

 

Twinkle, twinkle, buckle Mcgunkle.

 

It wasn't until long before she felt a pull on her earlobe, and the stretch startled her to the ground as she turned to Kim Yongsun, the Student Council President who now sent a glare her way. "Your 'song' is getting louder, Byul-ah. I don't need any weird songs while we try to finish this one."

 

A pause until Byul's face flashed a recognition. "Ah…Ah! I'm sorry. I didn't even realize it." Yongsun sighed good-heartedly, circling the long table to see how everyone else is doing. She knew that this kind of habit resurfaces every time the girl is highly engaged with a certain activity, but there's something else. "How many hours of sleep did you get last night?"

 

The silence is enough of an answer..

 

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