The Way Forward

Fate Reconsidered

                Back in the cave, the pair sat in stunned and somewhat disbelieving silence. Gunwoo poked at the remains of a fire with a stick, self-consciously rubbing his abdomen, while Changmin just looked at him. The awe was still there, even if he’d managed to temper it a bit. Under normal circumstances, he would have cherished the expression, but just then, he was… confused. If he was pregnant… no, since he was pregnant… he should be happy. His and Changmin’s child… That was never something he ever thought might happen. Not even in the wildest of dreams.

                Glancing at the wall with his daily markings, there had been more than enough time for him to be where he was. The gestation period of an angel was longer than a human so it was still quite early for him, but all the signs fit and the scans had confirmed it. And there’d been more than a few opportunities for this to happen, but he still didn’t know how. That was what was freaking him out.

                “You okay?” Changmin quietly asked across the distance between them.

                Part of Gunwoo wanted him right there, holding him, but the other was grateful he was giving him space. “No,” he mumbled first, sighing once before he corrected, “Yes.” That didn’t feel quite right either so he added, “Maybe.”

                Moving over slowly, Changmin took a tentative seat beside Gunwoo and laid a hand on his nearest arm. “I don’t know why this is happening either, but… isn’t it a good thing?” he offered hesitantly, the hope in his eyes almost crushing.

                Gunwoo pulled into himself, though he didn’t brush Changmin’s arm away. Of course it was a good thing. Their child? It was a miracle of miracles. But it was also terrifying. And not just because it was supposed to be impossible for him to even become pregnant. If it was just him and Changmin, this life was fine. They could handle almost anything that came their way, with little to no trouble. A baby… was not so simple. They were beautiful and amazing things but they were also noisy, difficult to understand, always hungry, and susceptible to so many things… Looking around the cave, he knew they were not ready for it. Didn’t know if they would ever be.

                With his lip between his teeth, Gunwoo reached out to grab Changmin’s hand. “I am happy,” he promised the other angel, squeezing tight. “But I’m also terrified,” he admitted, shaking his head. “I can only hope it’s a normal pregnancy but we don’t know. And I don’t know what’s going to happen if it continues to grow like it should, and what are we even going to do for a baby here, and why is this happening to me?!” he ended on an emotional wail that would have embarrassed him if he wasn’t already feeling overwhelmed.

                “Hey,” Changmin soothed, automatically, pulling Gunwoo into his arms and holding tight. “I can only imagine how frightening this might be, but we can do this. I know we can,” he assured the other angel, pressing a kiss to black locks comfortingly.

                “But we really don’t have anything for a baby here,” he murmured again, clinging to Changmin’s shirt with tight fists.

                He felt more than saw Changmin’s nod. “You’re right, but we haven’t explored the rest of the area and… with something like this, I think we’ve got reason to now. There have to be other people here and if so, they should be able to help. Right?”

                Gunwoo sniffed and was annoyed at himself for crying, but took a breath and nodded in agreement anyway. “Yeah. Okay.” Willing calm back, albeit shakily, Gunwoo struggled to sit up, though he moved his hands to grab Changmin’s, needing the contact. “It’s still very early so we’ve got some time.” He glanced at the mouth opening and frowned. “I’m worried about the cold but unless it’s an unreasonably long winter, we shouldn’t have to worry about it when…” he trailed off with a glance down. “The baby is due.”

                “How far along do you think you are?” Changmin asked carefully, eyes following Gunwoo’s.

                With a slight frown and another glance at the marked wall, he answered, “Can’t be much more than two moon cycles or so. Maybe a little less, depending on when…” he trailed off again, looking at Changmin expectantly, an unexpected flush rising to his cheeks. Curse these emotions…

                “Ah,” he nodded in understanding, doing mental calculations in his head. “So, if everything is normal,” and he hesitated on that word – this whole situation was so far from normal it wasn’t even funny, “then you’ve got another ten or eleven moon cycles or so?”

                “Probably,” Gunwoo confirmed. Likely he wouldn’t start to show for another two or three moon cycles, which was good, but he was still having a hard time wrapping his head around the fact that he was pregnant. There had to be a reason, but he didn’t know it yet. The Discoverer Hope had never said anything about impossible things happening, only that they may be truly happy and… Wait. What was the other thing he said? Something about wishes being fulfilled? Maybe? His wish had been fulfilled: being with Changmin without the restrictions of his birth and just being free from it all. But there had been two of them when they went through the black hole… “Minnie?” he hummed, chewing on his bottom lip.

                “Yeah?” the other angel answered quickly, leaning close.

                “Before… did you want kids?” he asked hesitantly, not sure how to frame the question.

                Changmin nodded. “Yes. It was the one thing I regretted most about the idea… dream really, of spending my life with you.” His hands tightened almost uncomfortably but then he relaxed with a sigh. “Not that any of it mattered when you were taken away from me.”

                Stricken by the admission, Gunwoo whispered, “Did I mean so much to you?”

                “You were my world, Woo,” Changmin admitted with a shrug, reaching up to caress his cheek with a tender hand. “Watching over you as you grew up and then… falling for you,” he exhaled with a small shake of his head. “There was no one else.”

                That broke Gunwoo’s heart in a different way. “Oh, Minnie,” he whimpered, crestfallen, but filled with so much bittersweet joy he didn’t know what to do. So he crawled into Changmin’s lap and wrapped his arms and legs and wings around him, hugging as tight as he could. He wanted to give as much comfort as he could, but he needed it too. Arms and wings folded around his body, gripping tight as a face pressed hard against his shoulder and neck. “I’m sorry, love,” he whispered, petting soft strands of dark brown hair. “For not realizing sooner.”

                “You mean so much to me,” he admitted, lifting his head to look into Gunwoo’s eyes. “Between the two of us,” he murmured, leaning forward to kiss the other angel, fingers firming desperately. “I know we can do this,” he finished when he pulled away enough to speak, resting their foreheads together. “One day at a time, yeah?” he added, staring into Gunwoo’s eyes again.

                “Yeah,” Gunwoo whispered back, trembling inside and out. Still afraid, still uncertain, but with Changmin, it seemed as if anything might be possible after all.

                They didn’t do anything the first day, staying home and just absorbing the new knowledge of what they had and what they needed to do. But it was soothing and grounding and exactly what Gunwoo needed. And when they made love that evening, it took on a tender reverence where Gunwoo again felt overwhelmed by Changmin’s unwavering love for him. It was then that he realized he truly wanted to give this angel everything, and he knew he would do everything in his power to help make him happy.

                On the following day, they started their searching abroad. While they’d explored most of the plains and the forest, finding ocean on all sides, they had yet to tackle more than a short distance on the other side of the mountains. But when they did, it quickly became apparent that they were indeed on a smaller island. Small being relative. They could cover a great deal of ground by flying in shorter period of time. For all intents and purposes, they appeared to be an uninhabited island. That wasn’t to say that there were no people on the planet. Just none here…

                “Okay. So if we’re on an island, then there must be a larger continent somewhere around here,” Changmin stated confidently, looking around the horizon from the top of the mountain.

                Gunwoo joined him in observing for land in the distance. Now that they were actively searching, it wasn’t so difficult to notice a dark clump in the distance that could very well be land. “I don’t think we should try today, but it definitely wouldn’t hurt to make the trip soon to see what we might find,” Gunwoo encouraged, pointing at the blob of what he hoped was an island.

                “Looks a bit far. You sure you’re going to be up for it?” Changmin couldn’t help but ask with a nervous glance at Gunwoo’s stomach again.

                The shorter angel snorted and nodded, “I’m in the early stages of pregnancy. Not an invalid,” he reminded his companion. “This,” and he gestured at his stomach, “won’t do much to get in the way until much later, I assure you,” he explained, recalling Hyosung’s pregnancies. She had been able to do everything as normal until right around the eleventh moon cycle and even then…

                “Okay. Just making sure,” Changmin admitted with a still nervous expression. “First time and all,” he shrugged helplessly.

                “Well, this’ll be my fourth,” Gunwoo sighed. “Albeit from a different perspective. I’ve got a pretty good idea of what to expect. Mostly,” he amended, knowing that this wasn’t exactly standard.

                “At least one of us does,” his lover exhaled, both worried and grateful.

                On the morrow, they left bright and early for the blob in the distance. Colder temperatures were starting to make it harder to fly higher up and over the water, it was a fair bit chillier, but they’d managed to take a blanket or two and modify it for a coat of sorts. And gliding a fair distance helped them conserve energy so that it didn’t take them too long in the morning to reach their destination. It was smaller than their island, and more forest than plains or mountains. A quick pass after a rest on the beach showed no signs of humanoid life, though there were animals aplenty.

                From here, they could see another pinprick of what they assumed to be land in the distance, but it appeared to be further. Without complaint, they agreed not to try that day. Their first foray a success, the pair returned to the cave and settled in for lunch while Changmin volunteered to do a circuit around the island to see if there were any other islands within sighting distance.

                “I’m just gonna take a quick pass and see what I can from above the water,” he promised after they’d finished and were contemplating what to do next. “You stay and rest,” he urged, caressing the back of Gunwoo’s head with his hand.

                Gunwoo gave him a skeptical glance but then shrugged with a sigh. A nap did sound nice right about now. It just made him worried because he knew that if he was feeling tired now, it was probably going to be a tiring pregnancy. At least if his experience with the twins was any indication. Offhandedly, he sincerely hoped that it didn’t mean he had twins too but then he waved that off as impossible. Well, the pregnancy was already impossible. Why should there be something else that was impossible too?

                Changmin’s foray located quite a few more islands in the distance. Most of them looked like the small one they’d reached that morning, but there was a larger one that seemed promising. “We can hit the smaller ones but I think we should try for the larger island. It’s got a better chance of people being there,” he explained, gesturing in the general direction of the island he was talking about.

                “I think you’re right. While I’d rather leave no stone unturned, we have a time limit and I’d prefer to find something sooner rather than later. Besides, we’ll have time to investigate the other islands eventually,” Gunwoo shrugged, not up to making a new plan anyway.

                Together, they devised their next step and decided that they would probably need to spend at least a few days in search. They packed a bag each and made ready to go on an adventure the following day. If it was anything like this island, they’d be able to find water and food aplenty. And with divination, that possibility was even higher. It only took them a day to make it to the island, hopping from smaller ones to catch a break along the way. And from there, they found a small space to make their own on the beach. It had less shelter than the cave, but it was open enough to see anything coming. Fortunately, branching out from there, it didn’t take them long to find signs of life.

                There were plenty of the same kinds of creatures from their island, and a few new ones, but they also tracks and remains that were likely from other people. They couldn’t say what kind of people – humans, angels, demons, something else… all were likely. But try as they might, they were unable to find the people they knew had to be there. Within a week, they were frustrated and annoyed.

                “It just feels like we’re missing something,” Gunwoo grumbled, tossing a twig at the small fire they had going for the night.

                “I know, love. But there has to be something. We’ve been over the whole island and we know that there must be someone. We just have to keep trying,” he encouraged, brushing reassuring fingertips against Gunwoo’s arm.

                The pregnant man half-heartedly flinched away with a disgruntled groan. “It’s just so annoying…”

                “I agree,” Changmin wisely echoed with a nod, not taking offense. He was starting to learn how to navigate Gunwoo’s mood swings, after all.

                They both nearly leaped out of their skins when a new voice spoke at the edge of their camp. “As it should be.”

                In a flurry feathers and summoning weapons and armor, both jumped to their feet and went back to back defensively, eyes casting about for whoever was out there. “Who’s there?” Gunwoo started with a growl.

                “Show yourself!” Changmin commanded at nearly the same instant, every nerve on high alert.

                “Calm down,” the speaker laughed in genuine amusement, quiet footsteps sounding on sand as they slowly moved into the firelight. “I meant no harm,” the stranger promised with her hands raised in surrender, a gentle smile alighting her young and innocent face.

                Gunwoo blinked in surprise and thought it was strange that neither of them had heard nor even felt her nearby. It was stranger still that she was there at all since they’d seen no sign of anyone in person for a week now. “Who are you?” he asked again, flaming sword pointing at her cautiously.

                She seemed unperturbed by the appearance of their wings and weapons and armor. Instead, she shook her head, upsetting the soft golden curls until they settled back into place with ease. “No one you need to fear,” she promised, her dark eyes twinkling in amusement. “You can call me Sunny. I have seen you flying around recently and saw your campfire so I figured it would be a good time to introduce myself.”

                “Why haven’t we seen you before?” Changmin asked warily, inching a bit closer to place himself just in front of Gunwoo. “We’ve been over this whole island a couple times now and saw no one.”

                “You’ve looked but you haven’t seen,” Sunny agreed, her tone hinting there was more to it.

                “Why are you here?” Gunwoo asked, lowering his weapon and gently pressing on Changmin’s arm for him to do the same.

                Sunny’s smile brightened even further, an expression that was fit to rival her namesake. “To help you of course.”

                “But why?” Changmin demanded, sword tip down but not forgotten. It was clear he didn’t trust this stranger.

                She nodded in understanding, reaching down to brush at the simple white cloth dress she was wearing. “Like all who find their way here, you are searching for something. I only wish to help you find it,” she shrugged, clasping her hands demurely before her.

                “Like all who find their way here?” Gunwoo mirrored her, head tilting to the side curiously. “There are others here?”

                “Of course,” Sunny nodded once, freeing one hand to gesture behind her. “I can show you if you’d like.”

                “Why should we trust you?” Changmin asked, still cautious. Almost abnormally so, but Gunwoo couldn’t fault him. He was after all looking out for him and their child.

                “Why shouldn’t you?” she countered, glancing down at her person.

                Changmin’s eyes narrowed and he shook his head. “Just because you look harmless and innocent doesn’t mean that you are.” That was true enough. Angel and demons alike could look remarkably defenseless, but most were incredibly dangerous. Especially Royals. And Gunwoo knew that just because she didn’t have wings, it didn’t mean there wasn’t more to her.

                “You are understandably cautious,” Sunny conceded good naturedly, bowing once. “If you’d prefer, I can come back during the day and show you in the morning light.”

                “And how do we know you won’t just get more people to come back?” Changmin couldn’t help but ask, running through all the possibilities in his head.

                Gunwoo finally stepped close and laid a reassuring hand on Changmin’s shoulder. “Minnie. I think… we should go with her,” he admitted, biting his bottom lip hesitantly.

                “What?” Changmin chirped in surprise, looking at the woman suspiciously for a second as if she’d someone done something to make Gunwoo change his mind.

                “I don’t feel any danger from her. Divination would have told me something if we were,” he added with a shrug. “And if worse comes to worse, we are generally quite capable of taking care of ourselves,” he reminded the taller angel with a confident smile.

                They just looked at each other for a moment, weighing their options in silence. “Are you sure?” Changmin eventually asked with a meaningful glance down at Gunwoo’s stomach.

                “Yes,” the former Heir promised evenly.

                Not happy, but clearly willing to go along with his lover for the time being, Changmin took a breath and nodded. “Alright. But if you try anything,” he warned, pointing his sword at Sunny, “you will regret it.”

                “Of course,” she agreed, unbothered by his threat. “Now, if you’ll just follow me,” she gestured, shifting to motion towards a small path at her back.

                “Lead on,” Gunwoo murmured, grabbing Changmin’s hand in his, squeezing tight. He thought he was doing the right thing, but it was always hard to say for sure. Especially now.

                Hand in hand, Gunwoo and Changmin followed the diminutive form of the woman before them. In every way, she looked like a human, but there was something about her that spoke of more. Maybe it was her demeanor or her almost unnatural grace, or maybe it was just a feeling, but rather than be alarmed by this realization, Gunwoo was strangely reassured instead. And that reassurance only grew as they followed along until they came to a marker that could only be called a gate. It didn’t look like one exactly, with two large trees rising up, tops reaching for each other like an archway, but something about it felt like just such a thing.

                Sunny paused in front of it smiled warmly at them, beckoning with a small hand. “Through here,” she promised, taking the first step and abruptly disappearing when she passed the trees.

                Gunwoo and Changmin gasped, stepping closer to each other, immediately suspicious. “I guess that would explain why we couldn’t see them?” Gunwoo murmured, cautiously reaching forward as if to test himself.

                Changmin slapped his hand down, not unkindly, and shook his head. “I’ll check first. Just wait,” he urged, motioning for the other angel to stay for a moment. Gunwoo frowned slightly, but then rolled his eyes and nodded in mute agreement.

                Watching from his vantage, Gunwoo stared as Changmin’s hand disappeared first, followed shortly by the rest of him. He held his breath when the other angel didn’t reappear immediately though, and took a hesitant step forward. “Minnie?” he called, glancing around and using divination to see if there was any danger. No. Nothing had changed. There was just… no response. He was just about to step through himself when Changmin’s head popped back out, expression a bit overwhelmed.

                “You’ve gotta see this,” he encouraged, reaching out to take Gunwoo’s hand and pull the shorter angel along.

                Without resistance, Gunwoo stepped through the invisible gate and then froze, much as he imagined Changmin had upon seeing what lay before him. “By the Cosmos,” he whispered as a technological and natural hybrid paradise extended from his immediate view. The space seemed to be a crater of sorts and on the tops of the rising stone walls were what could only be field generators, their gentle hum and power obvious even from here. Extending below them were mixed rings of various bits of other technology – houses and maybe shops and strange decorations and architectural marvels, and the natural flora of the area. Trees and plants grew through and around and over just about everything, but rather than seeming like a nuisance, they appeared like a support or an actual part of the enclosure. And everything was lit just enough by both modern technology and beautiful structures of bioluminescence. “What is this place?” he found himself asking, eyes drifting towards Sunny as she seemed to be waiting for his response.

                “Essentially, this is… Nowhere,” she grinned, laughing at the moniker. “What one might call an actual paradise where almost anything is possible for the outcasts of the universe.” The shorter woman turned and gestured towards the open space, adding, “Almost everyone here was searching for some kind of freedom they couldn’t have back in their former life. So many interesting stories,” she sighed, almost as if to herself. “While it might not be the life any of them envisioned, here, there is a chance for true happiness. For everyone,” she finished, turning to look at Changmin with a nod and then at Gunwoo before her eyes glanced down at his stomach knowingly, though she said nothing else.

                He couldn’t help but react by placing his hands over his abdomen with a sneaking suspicion about who or what Sunny was. If he was right, he had little enough to fear. From anything. But it was still a strange thought. “And where do we fit in with all of this?” he asked, gesturing towards the… city really.

                “Wherever you want to,” she answered without hesitation. “You don’t have to stay. You are not prisoners. And the outside islands do not hold such great dangers, but here it is always safe. And even the weather does not reach so far within this space,” she promised, extending her hands towards the field generators.

                “Who else is here?” Changmin asked curiously, eyes wary but with a hint of hopefulness to them. By the way he moved closer to Gunwoo, it was obvious he would be happy to have a safe space for the coming moon cycles.

                “Oh. There are not so many people here. Maybe a couple hundred,” she admitted with a shrug. “But there are many kinds of people, from angels like yourselves to demons and both older and newer races as well,” she assured them. “Whatever rivalries there may have been out there, here… none such exist. At least none that can’t be handled with mere words,” she chuckled to herself. “But truly. Any who would willingly risk throwing themselves into a black hole for only the chance of happiness has every right to be here. They all know it too. You are welcome here. I assure you,” she promised with no hint of deception or intrigue.

                With a hint of hesitation but more hope, Gunwoo turned to his companion. “Minnie,” he called softly, squeezing the hand he was holding. “I think we should try.”

                To his credit, he didn’t reject the idea outright. Changmin met Gunwoo’s gaze, looked at Sunny for a long moment, gaze calculating and wary, but then back to his lover and nodded. “I think so too.”

                Gunwoo smiled in relief and stepped close to give Changmin a kiss on the cheek. “Thank you.” It earned him a warm smile in response and another squeeze to his hand. “So. Where can we stay?” he asked, turning his attention back to the shorter woman.

                “I can show you a house for the evening. You can look around more in the morning, but I imagine you’re tired tonight,” she laughed, gesturing with her hands as she had been, showing them the direction they should walk.

                As promised, the home was free and while it wasn’t particularly large, it did have power and running water and Sunny explained that she would be by with something to eat a bit later, once they’d had a chance to look around. It almost looked like a conventional house, except it was partially built into the ground and relied upon stone and trees to help make up the flooring and walls. Definitely a technology and nature hybrid. It was fascinating.

                They both scoured the interior with divination to make sure there would be no unpleasant surprises. There was even a lock on the door to allow further privacy. The shower – with a small bathtub – was large enough for them with their wings, and the bed itself was plenty roomy, to their delight. Letting down their guard just enough, they took a long, languid shower together and then checked the door after to see if Sunny had come by. As promised, there was a small box of food for them and they took it inside to enjoy, after another divination sweep.

                Finally, at the end of the day, they were clean, sated, tired, and felt like maybe they’d found a home. On the surface, it was everything they could hope for, which also made them wary. But really, only time would prove one way or the other. For now, the night together was enough. Curling close and taking comfort in the presence of each other, Changmin and Gunwoo fell asleep easily.

Like this story? Give it an Upvote!
Thank you!

Comments

You must be logged in to comment
No comments yet