Telling everything and nothing at the same time

She remembered waking up to a vague feeling of someone holding her hand, and a soft voice coaxing her out of unconsciousness. She couldn’t exactly make out the words, much less the owner of the voice. But somehow it was warm and reassuring, and so Eunbi listened. She listened and held on.

Like an anchor keeping her tethered, Eunbi held on to the voice and pulled herself out of oblivion.

But what greeted her after, she didn’t expect. Not once did she ever thought of waking up in a darkened room, and holding on to someone with an unfamiliar face.

That very same one that was now staring straight back.

She couldn’t suppress the small shiver coursing through her body when their gazes met.

There was definitely something about the way the other woman was looking at her, a myriad of confounding emotions reflected on those sharp, brown eyes.

It told her everything and nothing at the same time. 

She had a strange urge to dive in those dark pools for answers, but found her insides coiling tighter the longer she held her stare. Once again she could feel the blood rushing through her ears. Unable to bear it any longer, Eunbi tore her gaze away in mild discomfort, and let out a breath she didn’t know she was holding.

“Eheheh. Sorry, unnie.” Yena scratched her head, shooting a chastised grin at the other woman. She then turned, and with a small bow of her head, offered the same apology to the doctor. “Sorry for the interruption, Dr. Kim. Please continue.”

The older man cleared his throat and regarded Eunbi, not unkindly. “Like I said before, Miss Kwon, post-traumatic retrograde amnesia is rare, but not unheard of. In fact, majority of the patients who suffered the same condition are those that have sustained head injury from car accidents, such as in your case.”

“Her memory, though… will she ever get it back?” The very same question burned at the back of Eunbi’s mind.

She spared the woman another glance. This time, she could clearly identify the apprehension brewing behind those eyes.

“I’m sorry, but as of the moment, there’s really no way of telling if the memory loss is permanent or just temporary,” he answered truthfully. “Medical technology right now can only go so far as to tell us that there was an injury.”

This time, Eunbi was almost certain it was not unlike the one reflected on her own.

“Whether or not she can recover her memory, only time will really tell.”

*********

She took a deep breath, the parting words of the good doctor still echoing in her ears.

“You have been through a lot. Your brain has been through a lot, and even though your body suffered no more than a broken arm and a sprained ankle, the injury to your head was severe enough to leave you in a coma for the past 3 weeks.”

Three weeks. She’d been missing her life for the past three weeks, and god knows exactly how many years before that because of an accident.

An accident she couldn’t even recall.

Exhausted as she was, frustration – and a faintest hint of panic – was beginning to seep in. Eunbi had always prided herself as a strong and resilient person, but how could she find and piece together her missing past when she didn’t even know where to begin?

“So give yourself more time to heal. Don’t force yourself to remember things. Rest. Be with your friends, family, loved ones. I’m not saying it’s for certain, but sometimes that’s all someone ever need to trigger their memories.”

The last vestiges of daylight peeked from behind the partially drawn blinds, casting the dark room in an ethereal amber hue. Her eyelids felt heavy, body inexplicably sore and begging for rest. Her mind, though, wouldn’t dare let her go just yet.

“Unnie, for someone who lost her memories, you sure seem to be taking things quite well. As expected of Kwon Eunbi.”

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