It takes a lifetime for school to finally let out. And I don’t raise my head until I hear the last student’s footsteps leave the classroom.

I take a good look at the empty desks. The classroom is so much more peaceful when everyone’s gone. Sure would be wonderful if it was always like this. With a wince, I sling my backpack over my shoulder. I head through the back exit and down the rickety stairs that lead to the baseball fields. It’s an exit not many people use which is good for me, so I can avoid any encounters with teachers. It’s not really a surprise but I don’t get along with my teachers either and I don’t need to waste my time being questioned by them. My sneakers hit the grass and I take a breath of fresh air – well as fresh as a smoggy day like today could be. I turn to head downtown toward the Cool Bean, but I think of what kind of look Mr. Shop-owner might give me if I walk in with another injury. The only thing I hate more than Sehun and those girls, is when someone pities me. I hesitate, my shoes scuffing against the pavement. But for me, if I don’t go to the Cool Bean, then where do I go? It’s not like there are many places that I belong.

But I don’t have long to consider. I’m shaken out of my thoughts when I feel a hand pull on my backpack and immediately my hands rise to my face. If it’s those girls again or worse if it’s Sehun….I’m really not feeling up to another round with them.

I wait for it, their sneers, their laughter but nothing happens. In fact, the shadow stretching in front of me is tall and unfamiliar. I glance back to see a thin boy with brown wavy hair, with a confused expression. I recognize that confused expression, unfortunately, and if I just imagined a red 7-11 cap on his head then it would be almost the same scene from yesterday at the convenience store. What kind of bad luck do I have to meet that cashier boy here?

“You! Are you following me? If it’s about the convenience store I already paid you-”

“No that’s not it. I-I just wanted to know if you were okay.” He stutters out, his eyes drifting toward my arm.

“Are you saying I don’t look okay?”

“No, I just- You just look like you’re hurt, and I saw you with those kids.” He wipes his hands together and glances around. “My name’s Chanyeol. I go to school here too.”  Sure enough, he’s wearing the pants and matching tie in our school colors.

 “and I know that you’re…” He hesitates, rubbing his neck.

For some reason, I was feeling anger bubble up inside me. “I’m what?”

“N-nothing.”

“I’m what?” My eyes narrow at him.

“…Their victim.”

“Look.” I get close to him, my face inches from his. “I do what I want. If I hang out with them it’s because I want to. I don’t need some sympathy from someone who doesn’t know one thing about me.”

That look on his face. I finally realize what it is. It’s not confusion. It’s exactly the expression I hate. The look of pity.

It makes me sick.

I turn my back on this guy and march away, my fingernails digging into my palms in fists.

Thankfully, he doesn’t try to follow me, but he does shout out one last sentence that makes me freeze in my tracks. “Did they make you do it?”

I spin around to face the tall boy. “Make me do what? Going into the boy’s bathroom today... or do you mean stealing?” I straighten up, smile and spread my hands out. “Because the stealing part…that was all me. I’m just as bad as them, don’t you know?” I spit out the last words like venom. And I watch as his expression falls. I’d rather someone look at me with hatred then pity any day. So, I leave him like that, alone at the baseball fields as I round the corner.

I don’t go to the Cool Bean. I don’t go home. I just walk as far as possible, until I find myself in a small park on the outskirts of town. The sunlight shimmers off the lake and  I fall into one of the park benches, leaning my head back against the wood. And I must have just sat there for a while, trying to clear my thoughts because when I opened my eyes again it was pitch black.

So, I have no idea what time it is when I finally find my way back home. I take a large sigh when my shoes stopped at my apartment. All that happened today seemingly weighs down on my shoulders.

Light streams from the crack under the door. I must have forgotten to turn it off again, didn’t I? I turn the knob and freeze. The first thing I see is Baekhyun sitting on the barstool, taking a bite out of an apple. He pauses when he sees me.

“What?” He retorts.

Oh, that’s right. This guy is here.

My grip tightens on the doorknob.

But why… why won’t my feet move? Maybe it’s because I'm relieved to be home after such a tiring day. Or maybe it’s because it’s been so long since there was anyone waiting for me when I came back home, but I feel the edge of my eyes begin to water. Surely, I’m not getting emotional over something so simple. Pull yourself together Ji Ho. I wipe any signs of emotion off my face with my sleeve and clear my throat before plopping on the couch.

“What’s wrong with you? You’re acting weirder than before.” He takes another bite of his apple.

“Did I say you can talk to me, fairy-boy?” I snap.

He huffs in annoyance before pulling out his phone to admire his features in the reflection, again. I flip on the TV, to my favorite comedy show and try to forget about the embarassement that was today.

But it's not long before Baekhyun lets out a sudden scream and the remote nearly flies out of my hand. I look up in horror. “W-what, what is it?”

He shows me his phone screen and the name that flashes across it. “My manager! Dang it, Kyungsoo. I changed my number how did you find me so fast?” He taps the end-call button furiously.

My shoulders fall, and I sink back into the couch. And here I thought there was an emergency. It was just this guy being weird again. But for the first time today, I felt a tiny smile begin to tug at my lips.