Weeks dragged by for Hongbin. The day after his meeting with Eunjung he put on his war paint and face CEO Hwang-nim. He told him about what happened, his option and the leniency of their choice.

It has been a blood bath to say the least. The usually calm and loving father of JellyFish yelled at him. And the discussion that carried on when he broke the news of possibly keeping the baby without marrying the mother lead to even more yelling. Not a day had passed since then that Honhbin didn’t thought about it. The manager hyungs are torn between asking him to reconsider terminating the pregnancy, some especially who have children of their own understood his feelings. Their thoughts are both helpful and now, since they are one of the closest people to him, working under their care for years. The members are not more helpful in helping him reach a decision; all of them were quite adamant about stating their opinion, most opting to say that they will support him regardless. Only Sanghyuk was vocal about his disagreement of having a baby around.

The past 3 weeks had been exhausting for Hongbin, both mentally and physically.

Rehearsal for their upcoming tour wrapped up a couple of hours ago, but Hongbin tended to stay behind to smooth out many details in the choreography and his vocal, very aware that if he doesn’t spend the time to perfecting everything he will be a dead weight to the team, since everyone is improving so much with their stage presence.

He was so focused on his reflection in the mirror, checking his footing the tips of his finger on the dance break part of their added choreography he didn’t notice someone had join him the rehearsal room. Only when the person clap excitedly did he broke out of his one track mind.

“That looks so much better, Kongs. But next time try to stand up a little straighter, make yourself seems bigger.” Taekwoon said from behind him.

“I didn’t know you were still here, I thought you went home already.”

“I had a vocal touch up. I just finished, because I feel like there was this one note that wasn’t quite right in the musical.”

“Ah… working hard as always.”

“You too, you have worked so hard lately I’m proud of you.” Taekwoon said, approaching Hongbin to pat him in the back. His hand lingered on the sweaty line of Ravi’s promotional t-shirt Hongbin was wearing. His hand squeezed the tense muscle on the younger man’s shoulder. “I saw something when I was out for dinner with the cast member. And I thought of you, I don’t know if you like it, with everything going on but it’s too cute I can’t not get it.”

“What is it Hyung?” Hongbin said tuning around to face Taekwoon. This late at night without make up, his brother looked a little tired, he has yet to gain back all of the weight he lost when he was ill.

Taekwoon walked back to where his backpack was. “It’s so soft and cute.” Then Taekwoon pulled out a paper shopping back and handed them to Hongbin.

Hongbin accepted it and without looking what’s inside he reached in the bag. He was quite surprised when his hand meet soft and fluffy material. Confused he pulled the item out of the bag. In his hand he held a small soft piece of fabric. It’s deep red with a little orange tinge.

“A blanket.” Taekwoon said.

“A baby’s blanket”

“….. yeah… we still don’t know if you are going to keep the baby, but when I saw this in the store it’s too cute for me not to get. I saw a baby Hongbin with even tinier hands wrapped in it.” Seeing that Hongbin remained silent, he stopped. “I mean I can always return it. Oh wait, I can’t return it, I had it costumed.”

 “huh?” Hongbin looked at him confused trying to find something special with the blanket.

Taekwoon reached forward and show Hongbin the extra fabric usually used to cover the top of the baby’s head. The cap was embroidered with the word ‘Red Bean’ in bold white letters and on smaller font it says ‘VIXX’s baby’ “I noted you keep calling the baby Red Bean when you were on the phone with Eunjung. So I guessed we are calling it that before we got a name.”

“Hyung…. We haven’t decided yet.”

“I know, it’s dumb of me.” Taekwoon said, making a motion to Hongbin to hand him back the blanket.

“Nope. I’m keeping it.”

Taekwoon hid a small smile, because he can see the way that Hongbin’s big eyes got even bigger and sparkle when he saw the blanket and the Red Bean written on it.

The twelve week check-ups and scan came around faster than Hongbin was ready for. He agreed to go with Eunjung this time around, before he has to jump on chains of flights to the tour cities and this week they have to make the decision. He thought it would put him in a better mind for their tour when he at least have an answer of what the next year is going to look like for him. An attempt to get back to the old Hongbin that can plan ahead.  Making arrangement with the hospital to let them use the back entrance so that no one will spot him and took photograph.

“Miss Choi, how are you feeling?” greeted the nurse, he was standing in front of the ultrasound machine on the other side of the hospital bed.

“Good, a little tired but good.” Eunjung said with a smile

“That’s normal. Lay down please. We will do the ultrasound scan now, then you get to meet Doctor Min.” the young nurse gestured for Eunjung to settle on the bed and lift her shirt.

Hongbin hovered behind Eunjung, doesn’t know what to do or where to sit. This is the first time he came to these kind of appointments. Thankfully the nurse noticed his awkwardness. “You must be the father, you can stand here next to Miss Choi to see the screen.”

Then the nurse squirted some gel into Eunjung’s abdomen. She was wrapped him thick winter clothing so Hongbin didn’t noticed any changes to her body until he now saw it bare, her once flat abdomen had started to grow, and a little bump can be seen. Her face scrunched and mouthed to him that the gel was cold, and he can’t help but chuckled. Then a handheld device was pressed on her abdomen spreading the gel around. “I’m going to press quite hard, please tell me if it hurt.” And he started pressing the device harder against her lower abdomen.

“So we see that your uterus have gotten considerably thicker, it’s good. You can expect to see it on the outside. As the fetus grow larger and the sac along with it.” The nurse move the handheld device some more seems like searching for something. “Oh there you are little guy!!” the nurse exclaimed excitedly.

With that exclamation by the nurse, Hongbin was snapped out of the mini trance he was in, and he looked up towards the screen. Then he felt like his heart stopped, his breath constricted and hi eyes watered. On the screen in grainy black and white was the image of Red Bean, the image of him that he never thought he will have now. But it’s there. At 12 weeks it’s no longer the amoeboid Red Bean he saw at 7 week, now the shape of the head is obvious, the body was already there. It’s a little human now.

In the sudden silence of the examination room, Hongbin felt Eunjung’s hand touched his. Reflectively he gripped her smaller hand in his. And simultaneously both of them squeezed, a silent support to undoubtedly the unspoken overwhelmed feeling both are feeling. He took his eyes off of the screen and looked down to Eunjung’s face, trying to see what she is feeling and what she is feeling at this moment.

Her face was glued to the monitor, like his had been the moment before, eyes glistening with adoration to their little Red Bean.

“So, your baby is healthy, the growth is normal judging from the size of the neck. Now the fetus is the size of a lime, at this stage the finger nails and toes are starting to take shape. Oh, the baby is shy, look how the hand is covering the face.” The nurse broke the silence. “I will print this image for you, hoe many copies do you want?”

Taken aback by the sudden question directed at them, both of the younger people in the room missed a beat at answering. Eunjung recovered a little faster and started recounting how many copies the want.” I would to have 2, one for me and one for my mother.” Then she looked at Hongbin so that he can give the number of photo he wanted.

“I don’t know, 3?”

“5 personal copies coming right up, and dr. Min would also need a copy.” And he fidelled with a few buttons on the machine. “Let’s listening on the heart beat shall we.”

Then a loud rapid beating can be heard around the room. It sounded very fast, like a little bird that had just finished flying halfway across the world in a race. This is the first time Hongbin got to hear the heartbeat of his little Red Bean, and it has a larger effect on him than the image on the monitor. He squeezed down on the hand in his, forgetting that his hand and Eunjung was still connected.

On that rather hard clutch on her fingers Eunjung looked up, and their eyes met. For the first time since they entered the examination room, they had the chance to look at each other’s face and read each other’s emotion. And since the first time since the entered the whole ordeal together they met a silent understanding. There was no denying how they felt about their little Red Bean; head, spine heart beat and all.

After a short wait dr. Min came in the room with a folder in her hand. She sat on the designated chair in the room and faced the young pair. Hongbin had helped Eunjung hopped off the examination table after the ultrasound examination. “Miss Choi, it’s good to see you healthy. And this must be the father. Mister..?”

“Lee Hongbin.” He supplied after the hanging remark from the doctor, she was a warm woman nearing her middle age, her head was covered with a few sliver of white hair what she seemed to wear with pride.

With a calm demeanor the doctor shoot right at the core dilemma. “We are currently at 12 weeks, if you want to terminate the pregnancy, this is the last chance, we need a week to sign you up and ready for the procedure. So I would need your decision now.” She scanned both of their faces. “I will not give you the update on the baby before you decide, I do not want to make it harder for either one of you.”

The doctor was waiting patiently for their answer, with a soft smile on her face. A perfect bed side manner after years of experience facing similar situation with young and old couples alike.

This time it was Hongbin that took Eunjung’s hand, and confidently squeezed down. Unable to verbally communicate his wished; both due to his overwhelming emotion and not wanting to take the decision out of her and if she were to decide otherwise. The gesture was half and an attempt to tell her his preference, but a full intention to communicate his confidence and respect for her decision.

“We…” Eunjung’s voice cracked a little, hints of emotion spilling into the spaces between them. She cleared and tried again.

“We are keeping the baby.”