I don't know how she always manages it, but Jisoo often looks like she is lost and dazed. Knowing her, her mind is either toggling between work or absolute nonsense. I looked at her pointedly and then at the Shepard's pie that I had made her this morning. The beef was no longer steaming. 

"You really should eat that pie while it's hot, I put in extra beef for you this morning." It was also one of the better ones from the supermarket, if I had to add. The birthday girl deserved better brunch on her special day, as much as she had already had this 28 other times. I watched as she gave me a mock death glare, before putting another mouthful of the pie in . She wouldn't admit it, but I know she likes it. She always does. 

That's what makes her so enjoyable to be around. She somehow always makes it known to the other person what she's feeling, and that makes living with her easy. 

Like now, she's complaining about the noise level I had with my date last night while munching on the pie. When she finished it up, I know my apology for my misbehaviour was to be forgiven. 

Somehow we can never really get angry with each other. 

I figured this would be a good time to pass her the presents, because somewhere in me I knew she would both hate me and love me for the choices. 

"You're rude, Byun Baekhyun." 

I didn't tell her that I'd snapped a photo of her looking fairly disgusted yet pleased at the same time to receive two condoms and a cup declaring that she's 30. 

"I know I'm adorable, thanks," I couldn't stop laughing at her expression. Her puffed out cheeks were so iconic and still holds that teenage childishness and fervour, that I could barely imagine we're actually 29. When you stay together long with your best friend from high school, I suppose time seems to slow for you. I constantly feel like I'm still young around her, and I can afford to be carefree. 

That was why I'd prepared her favourite cake for her tonight, chestnut flavour, with the words Forever 19 frosted on the surface. 

Yet her annoyed expression was such a view, I just wouldn't let her know about her special cake yet. 

"Don't be back too late, the cake will be done by 7pm," I said when I finally manage to swallow my laughing fit. 

She left the house then, but I didn't miss that small smile dancing on her lips and the sparkle it her eyes. 

Jisoo's happiness often manifests itself in the subtlest and most unique of ways. 

-------

I'm going to beat up Oh Sehun. Firstly, Irene notified Jisoo of their wedding first before that little piece of told me. It wasn't until I texted him that he told me he wanted to be the emcee for his wedding and all he said was "sorry hyung, love makes a man busy". I texted the middle finger emoji back to him, but said yes anyway. 

The second reason is that the meeting with Irene somehow brought whiny Jisoo back. Her birthday dinner consisted of us looking back at our friends from class, only to realise we were the only ones left single and unmarried. Although to be fair why wouldn't she be surprised? It's Oh Sehun. Yes, he's marrying Irene but, even Oh Sehun. 

"I can't believe even Sehun is settling down. I mean I know they have always been inseparable, but wow," I muttered to nobody in particular, "even Sehun." 

"I know. That's why my wish before blowing the candle is that some girl will finally adopt you so that you can move out of this apartment, I will attend the tenth and final wedding of our class and then we're officially done," she whined, "I'm officially done with getting outfits for weddings and buying gifts. I'm broke after the new TV we got." 

I rolled my eyes. We got the TV on discount and offer, and I was pretty sure the last thing she was done with was shopping. Part of my life mission was to salvage this girl's taste in her wardrobe. Ten years of friendship with her, and I realised she needed a fashion guide more than anything else in her life. 

What she said made abolutely no sense though. 

"Unless we marry each other, how's my wedding going to be the last of our class'? Not everyone married someone in class you know." Only Sehun and Chanyeol did. It's probably a trend involving tall, lengthy and immature men. 

I handed her a piece of tissue when she almost choked on her cake. She's so careless we'd once made a bet that she'll fall to her death before old age gets to her. 

The rest of dinner was a lot more bickering, and the usual banter. A lot more routine self-deprecation on her part. She decided that she would stay single, because she wouldn't have the demand in the market. 

I have no idea why Kang Jisoo saw herself that way. She was the same when I first knew her, after I transferred to her class in my second year of high school. She was the same when Irene first transferred. Half the girls in class were sending her death glares on the first day because our class clown Oh Sehun, the Sehun who would miss out on a girl's advances if somewhere in the background someone was talking about video games, actually paid attention to her self-introduction. What Kang Jisoo did, which was slightly shameful but I'll just take it as oddly characteristic of her, was to turn around to whisper audibly to me, "Oh gosh Baekhyun isn't she beautiful? I think she's the most beautiful girl I've ever met."

Jisoo likes to think everyone else is better, so she's happy not bothering to compare. It's like a fool's bliss that has been blessing her for thirty years. 

I guess Sehun's wedding got me thinking a lot more. It's not that I hate my own life, because as much as I don't want to brag, I got the money and the girls. I have decent work-life balance and an apartment in the middle of Seoul, albeit rented. There's just something missing, and I can't really pinpoint what it is. 

Maybe it's the deal that I'm supposed to cut at the business meeting tomorrow that's gnawing at the back of my mind. Or maybe it's the name of the girl whom I slept with last night, whose name I couldn't recall. Everything is just a blur, and I cannot seem to focus.

I'll just blame Sehun for it. It's his text message that completely shot me off the cliff. Our Sehun was getting married too. Even him. Even the freedom-loving, ever carefree Oh Sehun was embracing a life of marriage, of stability and routine, everything we hated when we were 19. 

"Hey focus, which one should we get?" Jisoo snapped her fingers at me. 

She was scrolling through the catalogue, looking at outfits for us to attend their wedding. Jisoo was shopping in her unique style again; browsing, pausing, hesitating, rejecting an option because she thought she'd look bad in it, then browsing again. 

"Choose the lilac outfits," I stopped her when the outfits appeared on the screen. 

If there was a colour that I was sure would look good on her, it would be lilac. Her high school prom pictures would be the proof, and I knew I could throw them at her if she argued with me later. 

She didn't. 

Prom was fun. She was in a lilac knee-length skater dress, and I had the misfortune of wearing an ugly tie because I lost a bet to Chen and Chanyeol. Still, I liked the bath of photos from then. 

"Honestly, Jisoo, you're not half bad." 

Please remind yourself of that sometimes. 

Happy Birthday Kang Jisoo. 

---

The moment I met Mijoo again was reminiscent of the first time I met her over a decade ago. It was in the corridors of my office building, much like a bittersweet throwback to the days of our high school's chaotic ones. 

The first thing I noticed, and I'm not sure what's that supposed to say about me, was that her wedding band was gone. Yet aside from the barely noticeable change, Mijoo stood there like the first time she hit me with her presence. She was like this unmoving force of tranquility against the buzz of everyday life. 

I know I'm 29, but I still have the right to be stunned in front of my first crush. So that was exactly what I did, for a moment. I had to mentally kick myself (or rather I mentally recalled the kick that Jisoo drove into my when we were in high school, when she urged me to talk to Mijoo and stop being, I quote, "a ing coward"). 

Oh, I was right, so she was divorced. 

She's back from the States, for good now. 

She works near my office. 

A reunion lunch? Sure. 

(A scarily familiar voice screams at the back of my head "Baek-freaking-hyun, you should have asked first! Is that how you treat a girl?" I could almost feel the pain on my again.) 

The lunch was a lot of me stuttering, so eventually I let her talk. I liked listening to her, and I supposed staying with Jisoo all these while made me a good listener. 

Mijoo and Jisoo were markedly different, despite the rhyme to their names. My best friend wore her heart on her sleeves, and somehow it was easy to get what she wanted and needed. With Mijoo she was a lot more reserved, but honest enough if you