18th December 2017

Onni, Jonghyun is dead. It’s because of you!

Will you come to his funeral?

You’re such a , you didn’t even care for him!!

He’s dead and you are here reading these comments, die you .

She massaged her head slowly, her head felt so hurt, her eyes felt so teary and her heart was also felt like stabbed by knives.

From: Soojungie

Onni, Jonghyun oppa wasn’t here anymore. I’ll come to his funeral tomorrow, would you like to join?

     She read a message from her sister and right after that her tears slowly dripping out of her eyes, she clenched her fist, trying so hard not to break down, trying so hard to tell herself that everything was a lie. So she turned off commenting on her instagram’s picture. It was hard, It was hurt.

21st December 2017

     Jonghyun’s body had already been buried. Yet people still critics her for not showing up at his funeral. And it still hurt. She felt like the need to scream to out of people there saying that she was hurting too, she was crying as miserable as people who attended the funeral. She loves Jonghyun too like everyone does. She was wanted to be there too.. but it hurts.

There were few people who closed to Jonghyun that didn’t come, like Jung Jessica, IU and Zion.T. Exactly where are they when their best friend was found dead?

“Onni-ya, it’s okay. Don’t mind them, okay? They don’t know what they are talking about.” Soojung has been saying the same thing for like three days continued. She took the phone and closed the news her onni just read.

“I know they keep comparing you and Taeyeon onni, but that doesn’t matter, right? Jonghyun oppa knows that you also feel loss.” She continued it with a little smile.

Jessica looked up to see her sister, she looked so tired, her sister was just like her. Both of them have been crying silently and pretended that everything was alright in front of each other.

“It’s not your fault for not coming to his funeral. SHINee’s members will also understand about your condition.” Now Soojung patted her shoulder.

“Onni, I have to go now. You’ll be fine. Do not open your instagram or any social applications also don't read the news! Their words are going to hurt you more.” She kissed her sister goodbye. And then she left to her schedules.

     And yeah, Jessica was back alone. She didn’t check her phone like her sis