II.

For a moment, you were simply too shocked to say anything as a dull ache came from deep within your chest, causing you to take shallow, shaky breaths as you shuddered despite the warmth that enveloped you.

When he’d left, you thought that was the end.

When he’d left, you thought you’ll never have to see him again.

When he’d left, you tried to move on.

And you did.

So why was life so cruel now, playing tricks with your heart 10 years later? He had not crossed your mind once since 10 years ago but seeing his photo again, sparked off thousands of memories within you.

As they say, you’d never ever forget your first love and he was the first for many things for you.

-

He was your first crush.

The first time you met him, it was during Physical Education lessons in your final year of high school. You were running tracks around the field when your eyes narrowed upon him. His lanky figure made him stand out amongst the jocks and his Mohawk hairstyle made him seem another head taller than the rest.

As if he wasn’t already tall enough.

But what really drew you in was his smile. When the sun rays shone on his face and he broke out into a huge grin that showed off his neat rows of pearly whites, you found yourself inexplicably drawn to this beautiful man.

From that day on, you kept a silent eye on him till graduation.

Always there, but never having enough guts to speak to him.

Needless to say, you graduated without saying anything to him for the entire year and you figured that was the end of your little crush, a little secret that you’ll carry with you to your grave.

Little did you know that every time you turned away, someone would be watching you like a guardian angel.

-

He was your first date.

Moving to a college rather far from home to pursue your passion, you never expected to see anyone from your old high school there. So when you spotted the familiar Mohawk hairstyle, lanky figure with tortoise shell glasses, to say you were stunned would be an understatement. Through the crowd of a thousand people, you both somehow miraculously made eye contact and he flashed you the same toothy grin that you loved so much whilst nodding his head a little in your direction. Against your wishes, your cheeks felt extremely hot that entire day.

Having a secret passion in music, you took up a degree in events management and you enjoyed your classes and life went on pretty normally for you. You had found out from another friend that said crush was doing Political Science and naturally, you found it weird when you kept seeing him around your campus grounds when the Political Science faculty was literally at the other end of the college grounds. You figured it was just you, but you caught him staring at you a couple of times. Were your eyes playing tricks on you? Or was it real? Whatever the case was, you couldn’t shake off the feeling of having a pair of eyes on your back whenever he was around.

September 15th

It was just another ordinary day for you and you left the café with your usual cup of coffee in hand. Just as you were about to turn the corner, a tall figure stood right in front of you, blocking your way. Looking up, you found yourself face to face with someone familiar: Jae.

“Hi there, Y/N, right?”

Tongue-tied, all you could do was nod.

“Phew I’m glad I managed to catch you…” Trailing off, he left his sentence hanging in the air and you continued to stare at him, your eyes egging him to carry on. Noticing your gaze on him, he quickly regained his composure.

“Erm, so I take Political Science and I heard you do events management and I’m actually doing a paper on that so I was hoping to get your help on it?”

It was rude to laugh but you couldn’t help the giggle that escaped your lips. How can an event management major possibly help with a Political Science paper? Also, you were sure event management was not a topic under Political Science. Jae definitely had another agenda, and it was plain for all to see.

“I at this don’t I?” Jae sheepishly rubbed the back of his neck as he peeked at you from beneath his glasses, a light pink of embarrassment dusting his cheeks.

“Well… I wouldn’t say that you …but next time why don’t you just tell me what you want straight? Is this your way of asking a girl out on a date?”

As a grin split across his lips, Jae nodded his head tentatively.

Now it was your turn to turn red as you tried to fight back the smile that was threatening to show on your face but that didn’t escape Jae’s eyes.

“Is that a yes Y/N?”

“Yes, sure, I’d love to go on a date with you.”

 “6pm tonight here Y/N?”

Perhaps you might have nodded your head a little too vigorously but this time, Jae didn’t hold back and showed his immense joy by gracing you with that huge grin that you loved so much.

Suffice to say, after that date, many more came and 3 months later, he asked you to be his as the first snow fell.

-

He was the first guy you had skinship with.

Even though you were officially together, treating Jae like your boyfriend still felt a little awkward. You blamed it on your inexperience – you never had any semblance of a love life till Jae waltzed into your life 3 months ago. You didn’t know how to act like a girlfriend; when was it alright to start holding hands? Should you be kissing already? Was it ok to hug him goodbye from now on? A million thoughts whizzed through your head and you started to wonder if you were good enough for him. You began to feel like a fool for not even knowing the basics on