Chapter 1: Fill My Cup

Jongdae
The radio stations are already playing Christmas songs on repeat; the deejays, talking about celebration and family reunions. Jongdae grunts and mute the volume. He hasn't even had his first cup of coffee and it's too early for this, too early to be reminded that the only living relative he has is an aunt living in Korea, one that couldn't even remember his name, much less his face. Jongdae shrugs and directs his attention to the road, trying hard, and failing, to ignore the feeling of the void expanding inside his chest. Liar, liar. A wicked little voice taunts. She used to bake you traditional chestnut cookies whenever she visits. And they were the highlight of your entire evening. She knew that they were your favourite. Okay, fine. If it was wrong of him to put the blame on her Alzheimer's instead of himself, sue him. He is tired, but busy all the time. Could hardly pay any attention to himself, much less an elderly woman living thousands and thousands of miles away, in a luxurious care home, paid by yours truly. Years ago he tried to get her to move nearer, to London, to home but the old sentimental soul still knows that when it comes to home, nearer for him means further for her. She threw a fit which almost caused her her life and that was the first and last time Jongdae dared bring the matter up.

Jongdae didn't expect his life to turn out this way. Nine blissful years in Korea; six years was what it took to fully adjust to life in a foreign country and a further two years of 'Be sensible, rational and always use your common sense', his father's tag line, before he went and got himself a mistress, breaking his life motto, mum's heart and the family up in the process. Now Jongdae is twenty-five, founder of a gaming company. One that is successful enough for him to live comfortably in a relatively expensive city but not have a single employee arrive to work before him. Maybe he's just a workaholic. He glances at his wrist watch, 07:53, a good thirty minutes before work starts. Definitely a workaholic. That's want happens to you when the only thing that's keeping you alive is your dedication towards what you do. And regardless of what his best friend, Kai, might say, Jongdae insist that it's a dedication and definitely not an addiction.

It's already a quarter past eight when the first person stumbles into the office, apparently still not fully awake. Jongdae really needs to get down to briefing his staff about time management, again. "Mornin' babe." Speak of the devil himself. Kai's voice is chirpy, a contradiction to his appearance which is mostly bed hair, glassy eyes and rumpled dress shirt with studs lining the collar. Slightly too fancy for work. And if Jongdae squints his eyes hard enough, is that a faint lipstick mark on his cheek?

Kai smiles sheepishly as his places, or more like drops, a cup of coffee in front of Jongdae. A silent apology it is then. Jongdae narrows his eyes at Kai. He isn't going to get off the hook so easily. "Jongin," Jongdae starts and Kai visibly shrinks into himself. You see, when it's Kai, everything's jolly and good and well but when it's Jongin, he meant serious business. "Party's over. It's already Monday. Now get your lazy to work and go schedule some appointments or meetings for me." Kai's easy smile returns at that and he strides over to his work space, throwing a 'so much for being the first at work today. And I brought you coffee. The expensive type' over his shoulder.  

"Not meaning to brag but you're not first today, I am," Jongdae retaliates, taking a sip of the steaming coffee. It is just what he needed. Kai is a guardian angel sent from heaven but he does not need to know that.

Said angel is currently sweeping away random junks into his drawer in order to make space for his laptop. How he manages to get anything done still surprises Jongdae till this day. "You're first almost as often as I get laid, which is very often," he says, dumping a few half eaten bananas at different stages of decomposition into the trash. Screw the talk about time management, they desperately need one on cleanliness, and food wastage too. "Which brings me to this," he adds, peeling a fresh banana from god knows where. "My sweetest sweet-cheeks, as much as I fancy you and would be more than willing to help you get some banging, the both of us know that that's unprofessional work ethics and an infringement on our friendship code." Jongdae marvels at the fact that Kai had on a straight face whilst saying all that crap. Sweetest sweet-cheeks? Really, really Kai? That's a little too low even for his standards. "But, you seriously need to get laid. How long has it been since your last shag?" He gives the banana a suggestive and no thank you, Jongdae did not have to see that.

"It's not like anyone's gonna approach me if you keep up with those distasteful pet names anyways." Jongdae rolls his eyes and they landed on the stubborn red stain again. "You got something there," he says instead, unwilling to discuss his life with his friend. As though he has one. Hah! He gestures towards his left cheek. "Lipstick mark it seems. So it was a bird yesterday huh?"

Kai his thumb and smudges it against his cheek. "Bird? Nope. Got myself a lad. And a freaky one at that. Really unassuming with his owlish eyes and coy smiles but you should have seen him giving me head with those pouty glossed up lips last night. We've been fooling around for a few weeks. I think he's a keeper." Kai gives Jongdae a wink and starts to boot up his laptop, it's bulky and dented at too many places to count, so old even chrome doesn't provides updates for it anymore, and takes forever to starts but apparently ironic according to Kai because he works at a tech related company. The half eaten banana is laying on the corner of his desk, forgotten. And Jongdae, well, let's just say that he is too traumatised to even question the existence of this lad who's a keeper and why Kai is keeping him in the dark about it. Jongdae suddenly wishes that he had talked about his life instead. At least he'll be the of all of Kai's joke for the next few weeks and not scarred for the rest of eternity.

The drive back to his house is a relatively quiet one. The radio is still switched off and the only sound is the soft steady hum of the car's engine. Tapping his nails against the steering during a red light, Jongdae starts to contemplate about what to have for dinner. He could go fancy and whip up some aglio e olio and uncork a bottle of wine or take the easy way out instead, the drive through at McDonald's. Why get through all the trouble of prepping, cooking and washing when it all doesn't really matter in the end. Jongdae's phone beeps and a notification for his meeting on Thursday with a potential client pops up. McDonald's it is then. He's slightly behind schedule and has yet to go through most of the proposals. Jongdae hears a honk and quickly snap his eyes up. The car before him is already a good distance away and yet, all he could think of is how he longs for someone to be seated on the passenger seat right now. Someone who will suggest that they drop by the new Indian restaurant down th